2nd March, 1998
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"Church Of Noise" by Therapy?Therapy? are the baddest bunch of noiseniks ever to pick up a guitar and gently strum it then think "nah", crank it up to 11 and smash it to bits. "The Church Of Noise" marks a comeback for the band, after a few years spent cooking up this malevolent metallic monster of a track, single-handedly rescuing rock from the likes of the dismal Reef. "Welcome to the Church of NOISE" screams head Beelzebub-collaborator Andy Cairns, as metal/rockabilly guitars explode around him like fireworks. Then drums like machine guns kick in and the track grits its teeth and goes over the barricades. Metal as anything. On the b-side is a "Messenger Mix" of the a-side, taking it into Prodigy country and leaving it on a hillside to fend for itself. It does rather well. "Suing God" is the other aural onslaught on offer here, a strangely plaintive rock opus that sounds a little like U2 with balls. There's also one of those enhanced CD-ROM video thingymibobs too. Therapy? Yes, please. Rating: 9/10
The Rest"Only You" by Portishead"Elysium (Parlor Talk Remix)" follows, with Beth coming on like a ghost scraping and scratching at your window as you huddle around the big beats on the stereo, trying unsucessfully to ignore her. Other extra tracks are an extended version of "Only You" and the instrumental of the "Elysium" mix. I defy anyone to play Portishead loudly alone in a dark room and not be moved by them. Or at least terrified by them. They are priceless one-of-a-kinds. Rating: 8/10
"Average Man" by Symposium"Journey" is first b-side, sounding like early post-punk bands like Eddie And The Hotrods. "Just sit back and enjoy the ride" they sing, and you do just that. Mind you, with lyrics like "we go quite fast", you'd be advised not to concentrate too deeply. "Little Things" comes next, a gentler acoustic number that sounds too much like Crowded House to be any great shakes. "Me" brings up the rear, a Nirvana-influenced (i.e. quiet bit, loud bit, quiet bit, loud bit, repeat) number that lopes along quite nicely. Symposium can be forgiven earlier mistakes as they were all only about 12 at the time. Now, with new material of this quality, they have grown up admirably. They'll be shaving next. Rating: 8/10
"Big Mistake" by Natalie ImbrugliaFirst b-side is "Something Better", a simple acoustic strumalong that is mildly diverting. Then comes "Torn (MTV Unplugged)". Unfortunately they forgot to unplug the microphone. This also has another of those enhanced CD bits on it, which should keep those of you with hairy palms out there happy. Rating: 6/10
"You Better...Stop" by The Candyskins"Just Another Day" is more of the same (perhaps even jauntier), whereas "She Don't Use Jelly" (recorded live in Germany with Tunic) is another fine mess, complete with megaphones. Ten years ago, The Candyskins would have been your favourite band. Rating: 6/10
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