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It was my birthday yesterday, you know. I'm getting too old for all of this...
"Spit It Out" by Slipknot"Spit It Out" is born Slippy, being filled with guitar that sounds like Satan chainsawing his way through the spines of puppies, vocals that have had their rough shouty bits finely honed with sandpaper and broken glass, and enough dumb ass attitood and posturing to make the real Slim Shady stand up and run away to his dope-smoking mom. All the while, teen America laps it up as if it's fake horror movie blood made out of raspberry sauce and we smug Brits sit back, smirk for a while then join in a big red sticky noisefest of nonsense. "This song is your new national fucking anthem" says one of them at the start of "Surfacing", before surfing the crest of a nuclear explosion of arc-welding riffs, scratching so sharp it lodges into your bones, and vocals that hide under your bed until the light goes out. "Fuck it all, fuck this world, fuck everything that you stand for" may not be the most articulate or well-thought out of rallying calls, but it does it for me more than a treehouse-ful of hippies, anyway... "Are you guys ready to tear this fucking place down" another rubber-faced gibbon squawks at the beginning of another live track, "Wait And Bleed", and the crowd go "yay" and make the pointy finger sign with their hands dutifully then mosh their way to Mars. "Wait And Bleed" is that rarest of things: a Slipknot song with a tune, and it almost sounds easy-listening compared to the other two... The vid to "Spit It Out" seeps out of the CD too. The band re-enact scenes from The Shining, hit each other with baseball bats; the clown looks scary and falls over; Pinocchio grasps his nose and tells lies; the kidz go mad. It's all a bit of a laugh, really. Rating: 8/10 The Rest
"Disillusion" by Badly Drawn BoyB-sides are usually an excuse for BDB to experiment with a whole laboratory full of weirdness and wackiness, but "Bottle Of Tears" is relatively straight, although it does have a tendency to sound like a horrible old 60s skiffle band. "Wrecking The Stage" is more avant gardey however, an instrumental that posits the question of what the Beach Boys would have sounded like if they met the Silver Surfer and ate funny mushrooms all night. Rating: 6/10
"Jediwannabe" by Bellatrix"Happy Go Lucky" is even more distressingly perky and exuberant, the kind of thing boys with floppy fringes and girls with flowery miniskirts used to like. Now those boys and girls shop in Ikea for beds for the 2.4 children and the rest of us are listening to Slipknot. So go away. The "Helen Love Remix" of "Jediwannabe" plops out of the rear, bizarrely injecting the original full of SAW style handbag house and letting it march around drunkenly and frightened, trying to dance moves like Steps but ending up looking as though its having a fit. Rating: 4/10 |