22nd March 1999


Single of the Week

"Flat Beat" by Mr Oizo

This you are almost unbearably familiar with by now: that drunk-bluebottle-in-a-nightclub hook firmly lodged into your brain - and all because of a yellow puppet called Eric. I'm sorry for giving into the power of advertising so willingly, but Mr Ozio's "Flat Beat" - even though we'll all be sick to the back teeth of it in a fortnight - is the coolest and sharpest thing around this week. Unlike Sta-prest clothes, which suck (so your advertising's lost on me, Mr Levi).

An extended mix of the a-side expands the bluebottle's lifespan on the b-side, then "Monday Massacre" takes the same temple-throbbing bass sound and wraps it around another, slower tune, making it sound something like the moon running out of batteries.

The insert matter-of-factly advises "Do not eat this record". Now, whilst that might be advice better aimed at the likes of Cartoons' pre-school audience, it has a point - anything this tasty and addictive is hard to keep out yer gob (I'm sure there's a Monica Lewinsky joke in there, but I can't be bothered looking for it).

Rating: 9/10

The Rest

"B Line" by Lamb

Whilst the populist in me is happy making "Flat Beat" SOTW, the purist in me is sulking because I didn't give that accolade to this sci-fi-matic meteor smash of beats, Moloko/Portishead vocals and a chorus that takes your ears hostage. But, strictly speaking, "B Line" was out last week, so me and my schizophrenic chums (and me) feel justified. Catch the video to this and witness something rather extraordinary, like the X-Files exploding inside Toys R Us.

A couple of remixes follow. The Andy Votel mix plunges the track into a vat of treacle, the pneumatic beats slowed down to a more pedestrian pace; whilst the Herbalizer mix takes the song to Twin Peaks and buries it up to its neck in the middle of the forest. Damn fine remix.

Despite the greatness of this song (see Moloko also), you can't help but think that somewhere Portishead's lawyers are sitting down and drafting a very long letter...

Rating: 8/10

"Mo' Pop" by Dot Allison

After the leftfield sonic experimentalism of the previous two tracks this week, Dot Allison's St Etienne-ish liquid pop is - though rather pleasant - a bit of an anticlimax (even the whispered French bits, my leetle chooms). Gone are the post-baggyisms of One Dove, and in its place is, well, something not really as good. Mind you, this is perfect material for long hazy summer evenings - so best file it away for a couple of months.

"Melted (Edit)" is the first b-side, a nice enough instrumental ramble through ambient-land, then "Blind" takes over, a haunting, ethereal cloud of delicate Cocteau Twins-ish melodic pop which is the best thing on the whole single.

She went to the same school as me, y'know.

Rating: 7/10

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