SAUVE QUI PEUT!
AASC Club Skiing trip to Three Valleys -
Feb '97
This is the cry of the A-Team when we went extreme! The club has
had extreme skiers for years - idiots who get board with piste
skiing and instead climb up mountains and ski off them. The
A-Team is the advanced ski team class and we'd always considered
ski mountaineering as the preserve of the, well, foolish.However,
day 5 of the club ski trip saw a terrific dump of snow. It had
been weeks since any fresh snow had fallen and our instructors
blood was up! It was up the lift system to the highest point and
then climb.
Climbing up steep snow carrying skis and poles is recommended for
anyone seeking aerobic exercise, or was, just breathing quickly
through fear? Actually fear hadn't made its appearance yet as I
reckoned we could ski down the slope. We'd charged up without too
much trouble and it was only a couple of hundred feet down to the
piste. However, I then remembered this was a ridge, and ridges
have two sides. The view from the top was spectacular. The whole
Mottaret valley spread out two thousand feet beneath us with
little ants making their way slowly along the pistes far below.
And the way down there? Between two outcrops of rock down what
looked like a vertical drop covered in two feet of virgin snow.
Gary Raing had the somewhat dubious honour of going first and
managed to get a couple of turns in quite nicely. After that, of
course, the snow was all chopped up and most of us had to side
slip 10 or 15 feet before we could do out jump turns. I was
looking for hand holes and a proper belay point when I realised
it was my go next. Everyone else was in various stages of
disarray (except Gary who'd descended several hundred yards
without falling) but it looked a lot worse than it was. The joy
of flicking your heels and falling, in control, through space
until you land in soft fluffy stuff has to be experienced to be
understood. And looking up from the button to see your ski trails
wending down from a craggy ridge, well.....
Sixty six of us made it to Les Menuires in the high French Alps
this February, two people dropping out at the last minute due to
'flu (gutted!). Les Menuires itself is not the prettiest of
places, apparently, but I didn't notice as I was in the mountains
all day and only really saw it after dark. The ski area is vast -
the biggest in the world in fact. Usually you get to know a
resort and don't need a piste map after day 3 but I had to keep
mine with me until day 6. (That wasn't due to old age memory
loss!! - Ed). There was everything for everybody from beginner to
extreme nutter. We even had a dump of snow on day 5, providing
perfect powder for the last day. My only complaint is the lack of
street fighting on the slopes (sorry did you mean street
lighting? - Ed) so you can ski after dark ( don't laugh - they do
it in America inevitably!)
The hotel was, I suppose, a little modest but when people
realised it was an outdoor activities holiday and not some namby
pamby plush Trust House Forte management training course type
place ( and after we'd had our first meal) everyone mucked in. At
the end of the week the hotel got praise all round. More
important than anything else you could ski from the door in the
morning and back in the afternoon, no ski bus to wait for not
even a walk to the nearest lift.
Needless to say there was plenty going on in the evenings. My
team wuz robbed in the quiz, losing by just one point not that
anyone was at all competitive - but I bet they cheated.
Broomballing (ice hockey without skates) was pretty competitive
too. What made it quite amusing as there is no control over
anything much at all when you're on an ice rink in trainers. My
team were robbed at that too - the video playback clearly shows
their goal was after the final whistle. For the first time we had
a party out on skidoos one evening. They are motorised sledges -
a bit like motorbikes with tracks. Bum boarding (cheaper but more
dangerous) made its appearance and many of the party who are
younger than me ( and Dave Owens who isn't) made a couple of
visits to the local bars and clubs. By tradition the last night
is fancy dress, this years theme being 'P' hence pirates,
policewoman, prostitutes (3), prisoners (4), a piste map,
protester, punks (3), penguins (3), pied piper, etc, etc. a good
time was had by all and some of us weren't even drunk.
The other tradition is the awarding of
prizes, which went like this :- 
Mr Poseur - Jeff Fereiro for spending all week
looking amazingly like Ghandi (or Ben Kingsley)
Mrs Poseur - Shaungh Harvey-Kelly (her real
name) for having the stickiest nipples (you had to be there).
Chukka Noakes Memorial - Richard Hothersall
taken ill one day.Richard very carefully crept around the side of
a restaurant so that no-one could see him depositing his
breakfast on the piste. Had he been looking up instead of down,
he'd have noticed the chair passing overhead.
Diplomatic Relations - Rob Morling. Rob had a
little bump with a Dutchman who (everyone thought wrongly)
claimed Rob had damaged his bindings. To placate the man, Rob got
into the same bubble lift and promised to repair the bindings at
the top. How ever, Rob got out at the middle station leaving the
Dutchman waving his fist as the bubble whisked him away. Rob
really won for novelty : The foreigner he annoyed wasn't French.
(What are Dutch people doing in a hilly place anyway?)
Best Fancy Dress - Kevin Tozer. He was Popeye.
Julie Higgins got a nomination for coming in black leather skin
tight trousers "Not much effort, but what a result".
Steve Venton Award - Given this year to Steve
Venton for being....himself. The best thing is he still doesn't
understand why he was given the award.
Lost in France - Nominees : Yvonne
and Shaunagh took a wrong turn late one afternoon and
had to hitch their way back from the next village with a lorry
driver. Rumour had it they enjoyed it so much they tried to do it
again the next day, but lost their way and arrived in our village
by mistake.
Winner : Rob Morling for keeping up the
tradition of not being able to find his way back to his own room
one night.
Unluckiest Person of the Week - Richard Hothersall. On
the morning of departure, both alarms failed, fortunately his mum
rang him (at 4am). Then the taxi took him to the wrong terminal
at Manchester Airport. He finally arrived 20 minutes before take
off.
Four Valkyries - Yvonne, Shaunagh, Anne and Sue Kelly.
Have dinner with them like I did and you'll find out why.
Crash of the Week (also longest nomination of
the week). John Laidlow of 'Laidlow Gorge' for
his peer Roger Daltry - inspired rock outcrop pinball. During the
week the Extreme Team developed a new technique for steep
descents, based on the complete disposal of all equipment on the
way down. The descents are rapid, but fortunately an appropriate
method of stopping has still not been found. The record for the
longest such descent was set at about 300 meters by John Laidlow.
Initiated by a gentle stepping out of his skis, John's descent
accelerated down a slope, passing close by two on lookers who
stepped back to allow his progress to go unhindered. Having
covered 200 meters of hard packed 40 degree slope, John skilfully
steered his way into a rocky couloir, covering a further 100
meters partly airborne, before coming to rest in front of two
French first-aiders who swiftly approached John to congratulate
him on his feat. (Yes, he counted them and still and two). On his
way down, John broke his pride, his sunglasses, his thumb, his
salopettes and also wind several times.
Most Improved Skier - Jocelyn Miller. She was
rubbish at the beginning of the week but she was pretty average
by the end. (Just joking - She really improved more than anyone
else in the week - Well done!)
Many thanks to Bob Seymour for his help in
organising the trip Bob has now retired to get married, being
replaced by Carrie Nelson who hopes the same fate may be all hers
(no, I really am joking now), and thank you to everyone who came
along and made the trip so successful. Watch out for details of
next years trip which Carrie, Adrian Rogers and I will be very
pleased to take your money shortly.
Andy Stone.
(Pictures to be added Shortly........)
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