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Archive - 09/02/2001 to 11/04/2001

Ben at 09:33:34 Wednesday April 11 2001
Gavin loves Harry, Gavin loves Harry, Gavin loves Harry...

Drama Queen at 15:03:20 Tuesday April 10 2001
Gavin - take off those claret and blue glasses and have a good, long look at reality.

And then lie down for a day or two, because it ain't a pleasant sight.

Comatose at 13:57:04 Tuesday April 10 2001
In 1997 Harry offered his resignation before buying the 'Sons. If we got sucked in, he would no doubt do the same.

And no doubt the fucking board would turn it down again!

Gavin in Snaresbrook at 12:21:09 Tuesday April 10 2001
If we go down Harry will remain as manager. Nothing will change. I don't see what all the fuss is about. I feel for the bloke, I really do. He hasn't let the club down the players have. He's not everyones cup of tea, but for me he's tried to lift the club from a joke to a force to be reckoned with. Face the facts people we are not fashionable and never will. Everyone wants to play for ManU, Liverpool and Arsenal. So Harry works wonders when he brings in some excellent players who would give there right arm to play for the elite top five or so. We'll murder Derby saturday, we're having a poor run at the moment and its not very nice to have relegation breathing down our necks. But we're not a poor footballing side. If you saw the Boro v Sunderland game last night you would know that Boro are extremely poor and deserve to go down. We miss a bit of confidence thats all and all the booing in the world at full-time aint gonna help. Harry should stay and ignore the drama queens.

Paolo at 11:10:40 Tuesday April 10 2001
If we went down, Redknap might resign.

Worth a chance I think.

Dave iP at 02:54:01 Tuesday April 10 2001
Nik, you might want to think about running a quick archive, this page is taking 'kin donkeys to load

Dave iP at 02:10:43 Tuesday April 10 2001
Is anyone else wondering whether Mr Ridsdale made any phone calls to the Sunday Mirror on Saturday, or am I just being a cynical bastard?

Baz at 15:02:12 Monday April 09 2001
Dazza: Niki had some snaps online from various pissups.

Jamie at 14:34:13 Monday April 09 2001
Rumours about Frank Lampard jnr going to Leeds may well be laughed at. But look at Rio. He goes to Leeds, plays in Europe at the highest level, looks the thoroughbred we always knew he would be. Captains the side and is an England regular. Most of the team he knows from his youth. Frank may well be a fool not take the opportunity like what Rio did. One pundit remarked how excellent Rio looks lately and that he had become stale at West Ham, until his move to Leeds. Says a lot about Harry and his cronies at Chadwell Heath. If Leeds come in with a Ł10m pound offer it will be goodbye Frank Lampard. Leeds are heading for glory, West Ham have progressed about as far as an asthmatic ant with some heavy shopping.

Les at 14:28:18 Monday April 09 2001
Dont be fooled by Effenburg's recent interviews about how much he wants to play Premiership football. The guy is coming to the end of his career and like most other continental superstars of his age, know that they can obtain a nice little nest egg by playing their final years in the Premiership. Its the money not the football that attracts him...I can read that quant like a book!

Dazza at 14:21:55 Monday April 09 2001
Snaps of what Baz??

Paolo at 14:18:12 Monday April 09 2001
A point away and Freddie remembers where the goal is, so better news for a change. But yet another goal against us from a free kick given away by one of our so-called defenders. When is H going to realise: a) that we need some coaching in how to defend in dead ball situations, and b) Pearce and Stimac are liabilities?

Rhetorical, of course.

Baz at 13:49:39 Monday April 09 2001
Nik/Daz: are the snaps still on line?

Baz at 13:46:58 Monday April 09 2001
Effenberg

Fat Fred at 13:39:44 Monday April 09 2001
Can't remember the name of the player but I was reading late last week about a European International who is thinking of playing in England next season, he was quoted as saying that he wouldn't mind playing for "any of the three London clubs" West Ham doesn't exist as far as Europe are concerned.

kristian in working at 12:48:13 Monday April 09 2001
Might be, Baz. Might be. =)

Baz at 11:35:53 Monday April 09 2001
Scandanavian Arsenal fans are obviously worse than their London equivalents!

Kristian in Oslo at 11:18:58 Monday April 09 2001
Baz. I do find some comfort in your view on Arse vs. Spurs.
Thanks. But I still don`t like em :)

Baz at 10:03:36 Monday April 09 2001
Kris: you'd soon realise if you were in the East End that Arse are a far lesser evil that the scum from Shite Fart Lane. From my experience, Arse fans are a bit like us (just conditioned more to success) while Spurts fans are arrogant wankers who think success is a God-given right.

Good point but we are now 2 points closer to the relegation zone thanks to the Houdinis from Coventry.

Kristian in Oslo at 08:11:13 Monday April 09 2001
At last: a point. Maybe hope of better days? On a side note: I won a 45Ł bet vs. a Spurssupporter for the Arse`s win. Reason I got into it was enormous frustration from WHU`s cupdefeat to Spurs. Tis a strange feeling not too feel joy from winning a bet. It was scum that beat scum.
Anyway: Screw Spurs and their "year that ends with 1"....

Andyinottawa at 01:08:17 Monday April 09 2001
Hi Dave iP, Colorado Avalanche (Denver) plays in C&B. But I can't give them much credit for that as to me they are still the Quebec Nordiques - one of several Canadian based teams that got sold and moved to the US. I hope Premier League football doesn't go the North American way, though I fear it may: for instance, threats to the supporters that if you don't buy x season tickets by a certain date, we'll move the team to some other city.

Having said that, Colorado are a strong bet for the Stanley Cup this year, so there may be a major trophy hoisted by a captain in claret and blue....

Ottawa Senators finished well at the game I was at yesterday (5-3 over Toronto), but despite finishing the league (regular) season second in the East, they are too like West Ham to do well in the playoffs - like my dreams, they fade and die.

Dazza at 18:51:36 Sunday April 08 2001
tis gone !

Dazza at 18:45:59 Sunday April 08 2001
dont worry paolo, i'll wipe it now!

Paolo at 18:04:36 Sunday April 08 2001
Nik - I trust you'll be deleting this filth asap?

Paolo at 19:29:36 Saturday April 07 2001
DiP - oi!

Dagenham Dave at 18:37:29 Saturday April 07 2001
Oh fuck ...Cov won away ... and we gotta go to Middlesboro .... I can't handle much more of this....

Dagenham Dave at 18:35:33 Saturday April 07 2001
Get in there you Brummie bastards! Come on boys the only way is up now....

Dave iP at 03:41:24 Saturday April 07 2001
Shit, I'm beginning to sound like Paolo now....:o(

Dave iP at 03:40:49 Saturday April 07 2001
Andy, is it Dallas or Denver who play in the C&B? Sure I saw them getting stuffed in the Stanley Cup play-offs last year. Natch, I was rooting for them, what did I expect?

Mike the Hammer at 15:19:24 Friday April 06 2001
Cheers Andy.
You lucky,lucky....
I'm at work until 5:00pm your time.

Andyinottawa at 15:16:11 Friday April 06 2001
Mike the Hammer: I won't see your e-mail until this evening (my time), I'll be back to you then.
The only good news from here is that Hammers have not been shown on TV for months (since away vs Charlton) so I've missed the latest debacles.

Niki at 14:14:55 Friday April 06 2001
Allo everyone. Just had a letter through about my seat allocation in the new Dr. Martens West Lower stand for next season!!!!

There will be 28 rows of approx. 350 seats including the corners in 12 blocks. No weather affected seats or pillars to get in the way.

The Lower Tier will not be ready until approx. 5th November, and we'll all be allocated tempoary seats in the Upper Tier until it's ready. Also the pitch will be 15 metres away from the front of the Lower Tier until it is moved at the end of next season.

AND according to the letter they are pleased to announce Season Ticket Prices will NOT increase "in most areas", but a small number of supporters may find themselves in a new price band 'cos of the seat changes and there being no restricted view in the LW anymore.

Mind you they couldn't seriously ask us for more money - one we're pants, two increased capacity of the ground and three we haven't spent any serious money and we're still sitting on the Rio dosh.

Am I renewing? ..................... yes ..... probably

Ian in Northampton at 13:25:28 Friday April 06 2001
Paolo: I ask only because I have a feeling in my waters about this one - just as I did that we were going to get beaten by Everton. I think we might get a result. But it's probably something to do with the loss of bladder control that comes with old age....

Penny a pound. at 13:10:30 Friday April 06 2001
Deadcrap out. The man has lost it BIG TIME!

Mark in At Work !!! at 12:31:56 Friday April 06 2001
Aren't we down to the bare bones yet ?
Why has Rio started to say that to move was the best thing? (maybe it's somthing to do with him playing well now as apposed to him playing SHIT when he first started !)
Are we going to pay more than 10p on a quality striker?

Paolo at 12:00:31 Friday April 06 2001
Ian - a drubbing. Need you ask?

Del at 11:44:27 Friday April 06 2001
I see Redknapp has started to defend himself on the WHU site and digging out the people who are starting to moan.

Del at 11:42:39 Friday April 06 2001

Ian in Northampton at 10:18:57 Friday April 06 2001
So: how bad is it going to be tomorrow? They've just beaten Man City away and Leicester at home. A drubbing - or the beginning of the revival - or just a scrappy 1-0 defeat?

Mike the Hammer at 19:16:31 Thursday April 05 2001
Hi Andy.
Consider yourself mailed mate!
I'm still at work,so use that one to get back in touch for the next couple of hours.

Andyinottawa at 18:32:00 Thursday April 05 2001
Just came on for my daily lurk, amazed to find reference to our Ottawa Senators! Deathly hush when I mentioned them in the past, reminded me this is an alleged footy site. Mike-the-Hammer, e-mail me to discuss more. Senators have easily qualified for playoffs (which start next week), so will doubtless crash out to one of the teams who've had to fight tooth and nail to make it.

Mike the Hammer at 17:33:26 Thursday April 05 2001
Didnt know his balls had dropped...

Dazza at 17:27:06 Thursday April 05 2001
I did hear a rumour that after the hammerettes Doddy dissapeared to the little boys room (or the fucking short boys room in his case) and wasnt seen for a good few minutes. And when he came back the pages about the hammerettes in his programme were all stuck together
He hasnt been that excited since having his photo taken with Sinclair at the training ground

Mike the Hammer at 17:21:04 Thursday April 05 2001
face? er ...oh yeah....as if anyone was looking there!

Dazza at 17:16:13 Thursday April 05 2001
livened up my afternoon no end, but from the back of the BML I cant tell if she is a decent looking sort or if she has a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp... loverly bristols though

Mike the Hammer at 17:06:03 Thursday April 05 2001
Daz,I happened to look up at a most..er...inopportune moment,as said groping was occurring.Most invigorating....

Dazza at 16:57:51 Thursday April 05 2001
Del, at the Ipshit game there was a rea ldirty Hammerette, bouncing all over, the shop she was at the end of the routine she cupped her bristols in her hands and proceeded to grope them in front of the BML stand (so Ive been told)
i was busy, er urm... reading my programme !!!

MTH - cheers mate i'm sure you'll find him for me!

Mike the Hammer at 16:49:14 Thursday April 05 2001
Daz,no problem mate.Canada is only a small country,so it shouldn't be a problem.Just give us the photo,and I'll start having a go at any Canadian who seems to fit the bill...

Del at 16:45:37 Thursday April 05 2001
I must start paying more attention to the hammerettes!

Dazza at 16:37:00 Thursday April 05 2001
Oh and Mike, when you get to mountie land if you see my mate over there tell him to write to me. He emigrated 11 yeasr ago and i aint heard from the fucker for about 4 years now. Aint got a clue what he looks like now, but I have a photo of us in the 4th year at school if it will help!

Mike the Hammer at 16:33:48 Thursday April 05 2001
Dazza,great idea!
Just the one little problem,how are we gonna sneak a crate of Stella in?
The other thing is that even the local Ice Hockey team.the Ottawa Senators,are renowned for bottling it at the big occasion.
They are in the play offs for the Stanley Cup after having a great season...now watch them blow it!

Dazza at 16:28:31 Thursday April 05 2001
Mike - why dont we just bring a crate of Stella into the BML for the Saints game and get pissed while watching the footy.. and at half time you can run onto the pitch and grope a hammerette (preferably the real filthy one who grabs her tits on the end of the routine (so ive been told :o) ))
so what if you get banned for life, you'll get a season ticket at yer local ice hocky team in a few weeks and WHU will cause you no more grief!!!

Mike the Hammer at 16:24:09 Thursday April 05 2001
serves you right for typing with your arse!

Del at 16:22:01 Thursday April 05 2001
Some of the worst typos ever in that last one - sorry

Del in Mooning back at 16:21:14 Thursday April 05 2001
I think you'll fing that I need to emigrate to the moon with Harry, before we have a ggod season

Mike the Hammer,pok in g my tongue out at Del at 16:19:30 Thursday April 05 2001
But that means if relegation is avoided,we will have our best ever season....

Del at 16:10:40 Thursday April 05 2001
You lucky, jammy b#stard - no West Ham to kick you in the nuts.

Mike the Hammer at 15:47:03 Thursday April 05 2001
On a brighter note,I am emigrating to Canada this Summer,so if anyone fancies a beer or alcoholoic/non alcoholic beverage,packet of pork scratchings etc,I'll be around for the Southampton and Leeds games in various drinking establishments,both before and after the games.

Del at 10:08:00 Thursday April 05 2001
I still can't understand why Rio would want to leave a club with a manager who likes to slag his players in public when his own shortcomings are never mentioned, a club with absolutely no ambition and join a team of young stars, with a tactically aware manager who defends his team to the hilt and a board willing to splash the cash.

Who's laughing now - well not me for a start. I was gutted when Rio left because I knew that they would never spend the cash on quality. He was fantastic last night and it really hurts watching him in a Leeds shirt when I have to suffer Stimac.

Frank C at 09:57:07 Thursday April 05 2001
Thank god we got rid of Rio. From the clubs point of view it has made no difference at all.
And it's good to see Rio doing so badly also at Leeds. I mean 4/6 months on and he's only been made captain, scored in the Quarter final of the
Champions league and commanding a regular place in the England team. Leeds must be as sick as shit, their investment will only pay back after 9 months ha ha.
To think we've got Song, dailly and Stimac instead. H must be well pleased.
Oh look there's a pink pig with sunglasses flying over the moon.

Weakest Link Campaign at 09:11:25 Thursday April 05 2001
http://www.mangler.co.uk/weakest.htm

Sign up if you haven't already done so. All messages submitted will be submitted both to the board and to the press by Mangler.

danielle in westconsen at 01:36:50 Thursday April 05 2001
i think your chat is so cool the pepole are so nice...:)

danielle

danielle at 01:33:18 Thursday April 05 2001

The Spirit of Villa Park 1991 at 13:13:42 Wednesday April 04 2001
Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry & take Harry with you, Fuck off Terry take Harry with you

etc etc

ad nauseum.

Del at 09:27:08 Wednesday April 04 2001
So the two major summer signings will be ...

35 year old Teddy Sherringham & 31 year old Gareth Southgate. Cost Ł10m - down to the old bones etc.

I think Sheringham is a good player, but he played for Millscum, Tottscum & Manure - a list of our favourite teams. Southgate is a decent player, but a born loser.

Holsten Pils at 16:53:30 Tuesday April 03 2001
Shhtop!

What are you doing?

This Football team isn't ready yet!

There is no consistancy in this team.

There isn't even a decent manager.

It needs time to give it that fuller flavour.

George Parris at 16:01:27 Tuesday April 03 2001
I want Redknapp dead, I want his family dead.

JIOHN at 14:41:10 Tuesday April 03 2001

Del at 13:10:25 Tuesday April 03 2001
That should read the Morman!

Sorry all!

Del at 13:09:17 Tuesday April 03 2001
Boris, you are absolutely spot on. Our season with the exception of 2 cup games and Charlton at home has collapsed in the absence of Ian Pearce at the back. How he plays Stimac after all the cockups he has made this year is beyond me.

I've always enjoyed Redknapp as manager, put up with his favourite over form selection system and the odd 4-0 beating, but this year the football has been pants, tactics, with the exception of the away games like Leeds, Manure & Sunderland, laughable at best and his continuous spouting of crap has worn me down.

In the words of Viz's Norman the Doorman the Norman
"Now f*ck off while i'm still in a good mood"

Boris the Spider in the bath at 12:48:59 Tuesday April 03 2001
Glad to see that finally someone has come round to my thinking. I've been sayingall along that we need a target man in the box for Di Canio and Kanoute to aim for, someone to pick up the scraps. Which brings me on to Todorov. When H bought him for Ł800,000, he never stopped on about what a bargain Todorov was. A top class striker for peanuts he said. Yet most of the time he spends sitting on the bench. Which confirms my belief that H doesn't select his team on form but on his favourites. Stu Pearce makes a howler and H forgives him even though he probably cost us the game. Ian Pearce is guilty of some sloppy defending against Leicester and Harry crucifies him for it. Harry doesn't have the bottle to drop players he is 'pally' with. Stuart Pearce should been slated for his craziness Saturday yet Harry refuses to do so. Meanwhile Todo sits on the bench, Holligan is knocking em in for the reserves and Tihenen slips thru our fingers while Harry plans a summer raid on clapped out old War Horses like Sheringham who's next stop should be the knackers yard. God Help Us.

Frank C at 11:23:51 Tuesday April 03 2001
Didn't H let Marcus Stewart go to Huddersfield wwhile he was at Bristol Rovers?
Another one sliped through the net. Matt Holland doing the biz

gooner in laughing at uptin park at 10:41:38 Tuesday April 03 2001
whufc r a load of tottenham!enjoy grimsby away next season!
chim-chiminy-chim-chimany-chim-charoo-who needs anelka when weve got
weve got kanuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

leroy in brixton at 10:39:26 Tuesday April 03 2001
you mamma!

Dazza at 10:33:55 Tuesday April 03 2001
PS if the shares to rocket then maybe we can raise enough cash to buy out Tb and we can all own a bit of WHU!!! :o)

Dazza at 10:32:51 Tuesday April 03 2001
Hello chaps... now I am usually a bit sceptical about things that offer 'free money' etc but htere is this new Internet shopping portal site that is offering 1000 free shares to people who sign up before 9th April. now these shares may be worth **** all, but Ive done it just to see how they perform.. it is FREE, and you only have to login once a week to qualify for the shares... if you are interested follow this link and you will get 1250 shares if you sign up b4 next monday....

http://www.bluecarrots.com/cgi-bin/signup/referme.pl?parent=0a142228323c465461031019&htfu=method1

As i say, it may be worth **** all when the company is floated but you never know

Paolo at 10:27:25 Tuesday April 03 2001
Can't see a thing today - someone's been using naughty words again!

But at least Southampton got thrashed, that's cheered me up a little.

East Midlands Hammero at 08:44:35 Tuesday April 03 2001
oi stan one good result in the cup how many times have we been beat by lower teams in the cup under rednapp swansea tranmere northhampton and more so think about it what has he done mmm fuck all

Want tactics? at 08:06:57 Tuesday April 03 2001
Check this out:

http://www.westhamonline.com/features02-04-01-1.shtml

James in Taunton at 22:18:17 Monday April 02 2001
Redknapp's getting closer, he says we need a striker - hopefully by May he'll realise we need a manager.

Dagenham Dave at 20:26:34 Monday April 02 2001
He's like a council estate lottery winner........

Dagenham Dave at 20:26:03 Monday April 02 2001
This is only one real problem. HR don't know how to spend money. Simple.

steve in bristol at 18:46:32 Monday April 02 2001
Mr T Brown CUNT Top 6 side could be FUCK OFF NOW SALE UP PLEASE

Turd in Home, drunk, somehthin at 15:13:18 Monday April 02 2001
I dun like ya ass no more
Fuck all yas
I am da NIGGA
Late yo

Frank C at 13:33:06 Monday April 02 2001
Allo Niki, and Stan, teh result against Scum was excellent and will probably last me the season. However, we've been moaning about H's linitations tactically for donkeys...now it's come to crunch time

Niki at 13:08:41 Monday April 02 2001
allo again

Niki at 12:06:30 Monday April 02 2001
allo

Stan at 15:12:25 Sunday April 01 2001
Harry was the hero of the day just two short months ago, when we kicked the Mancscum arses. Short memories you lot.

East Midlands Hammer at 11:06:32 Sunday April 01 2001
theres only two words to say to harry rednapp FUCK OFF

U.S. Hammer in Minnesota at 02:59:14 Sunday April 01 2001
Harry couldnt manage a bunk up in a brothel!

Paolo - on the night shift at 00:43:25 Sunday April 01 2001
8 hours and several pints later and I'm still fucking depressed.

Dazza - what's next is another three home defeats. There were shouts of 'Redknap Out' today and chants of 'Fuck Off Redknap'. Much as I think he should go, I never thought I'd hear that at Upton Park. Sad day.

Go now Harry, while we still remember the good times. Another game or two like today's and it will be too late.

EA in a state of complete depression at 20:24:27 Saturday March 31 2001
Frank C - crying to the board aint no good - THEY ARE part of the setup.

Anyone know when we last lost 4 home games in a row ? --
wasnt this season was it?????

Dagenham Dave at 20:10:34 Saturday March 31 2001
ho bleedin ho .....

Dagenham Dave at 20:09:32 Saturday March 31 2001
The s-bend in the back of our toilet

Dagenham Dave at 20:08:54 Saturday March 31 2001
4 spliffs later and I still can't get my head round it

Frank C at 17:21:47 Saturday March 31 2001
What's The excuse this time?
I know, H is going to state ' it bare bones time again '
Come on board wake up!!

TerryTTT at 17:20:22 Saturday March 31 2001
Shoot the bastard NOW!!!

Dazza at 17:16:17 Saturday March 31 2001
I have just returned from yet another inept display by those so called 'footballers'.. all I can say is thank **** for the likes of bradford, Cov and Man City because if it wsnt for them we would be in very serious trouble...

Dagenham Dave at 16:51:50 Saturday March 31 2001
We just don't look like a team at the moment. It's another dark dark day

Dagenham Dave at 16:50:20 Saturday March 31 2001
0-2 to those scouse twats. What next...?

Dagenham Dave at 16:49:14 Saturday March 31 2001
well that was expected I sp'ose

EA in in a worse place than HELL at 21:16:22 Friday March 30 2001
Well I can distinctly remember being at Upton Park recently when we lost 4-0 at home to Everton.
Oh yeah - H is still in charge - WWWHHHYYYY????

We're FUCKED boys while H and TB are still in charge.
Another 5 years of FUCK ALL - well since 1980 in fact.

SHIT IT AINT FUNNY ANYMORE :-((((((((((((((((((

Professor Pants at 14:09:22 Friday March 30 2001
A wedgie - is the constriction of the testical/penis area caused by a sharp upward motion/tug on the waist band of a pair of pants/y fronts from the rear of the occupied underwear by a third party , popular amongst boys of between 5-15 years old , and Australien Rugby League participants.

Paolo at 13:00:11 Friday March 30 2001
What the hell is a wedgie???

Ian in Northampton at 12:56:10 Friday March 30 2001
Paolo: let me see... Crap side. Loads out with injuries. Have lost to every crap team in the division. Bogey team. Shit away record. On the edge of the relegation zone. Hmmmm... A dead cert away win, methinks....

billy no mates in melbourne at 12:25:51 Friday March 30 2001
that Sydney bastard should really pull his finger out

FF at 12:14:04 Friday March 30 2001
http://www.football365.com/content/otg/looka/fw_looka_520757.htm

FF at 12:05:34 Friday March 30 2001
Hmmm, makes you wonder doesn't it...............

Bit of humour needed quickly methinks. Has this happened to anyone on the pitch before? Aus: Ouch! League star banned after 'finger up bum' incidents In an extraordinary case in Australia, the now infamous John Hopoate, a National Rugby League player with the Wests Tigers, has been banned from the 13-man code for 12 weeks for pushing his fingers into opponents' rectums. Hopoate was fingered by North Queensland Cowboys players Peter Jones and Glenn Morrison who testified that Hopoate had inserted his digits in their anuses during a keenly contested game last Saturday night at the Dairy Farmers Stadium in Townsville - a venue for the Lions tour in June. Cowboys captain Paul Bowman was another to accuse Hopoate of interferring with his 'saddle area' after a tackle. "I felt fingers. He was pushing up my arse, I was disgusted, I couldn't believe it. If he was a man, he wouldn't do it," said Bowman. Morrison said: "It was dreadful, I had pain. It was like someone was trying to put pressure up there." Hopoate's aptly named counsel Bernard Gross QC, only offered the defence that his client had been administering what is known as "a wedgie". However Jones was certain about what he saw, or rather what he felt, saying: "It was in the anal area. I think I know the difference between a wedgie and someone putting their fingers up my bum." An NRL tribunal imposed the heaviest ban in four seasons on the winger, after hearing more than three hours of elaborate evidence about players grabbing opponents by "the nuts", "the stork" and "the arse". It seems to be a common occurence in the 13-man, testosterone charged Aussie League game. "It happens all the time," concurred Hopoate. "You get wedgies all the time, and jabbed in the stork. I'm a great believer that what happens on the field should stay on the field." Sympathetic Wests coach Terry Lamb estimated that such incidents occur up to 10 times per game. Lamb, who played a record 349 first-grade games between 1980 and 1996, said he had never committed such acts but had been on the receiving end of similar tactics. "There's all types of niggling tactics - wedgies, biting, gouging, grabbing blokes by the nuts," Lamb told the Sydney Morning Herald. "I'm no expert but I've had wedgies. I'm sure the panel has as well. The game goes on."

RUSSEL CROWE in melbourne at 11:37:00 Friday March 30 2001
FUCK THE U.S.A ,GOD SAVE THE QUEEN ,THANK CHRIST FOR
AUSTRALIA AND GO YOU FUCKEN `AMMERS!!!!!!

Paolo at 11:08:25 Friday March 30 2001
Am I the only one who made Friday this week?!

Anyone fancy us against our bogey team tomorrow?

Thought not.

eastbrook ernie in up north at 22:45:39 Thursday March 29 2001
usless fact
the church elms used have the the longest bar in england in the old public bar . last time i called the only the lounge was open.p.s whats the beacon like now my old local.

Paolo at 18:18:47 Thursday March 29 2001
click

TerryTTT at 17:27:53 Thursday March 29 2001
Dave iP - purely on a platonic level!

Frank C at 12:26:52 Thursday March 29 2001
Did someone forget to turn the lights out or what?

Dave iP at 23:04:03 Wednesday March 28 2001
Just the young ones, eh Terry? ;o)

TerryTTT at 18:12:15 Wednesday March 28 2001
Hear Hear Paolo. Fat Fred - even I don't think HR could ever work as a prostitute; however, he has prostituted himself and the truth in the sale of Rio. Moreover, he whinges and whines more than an old whore (not that I know too many old whores!!)

Dazza at 16:08:35 Wednesday March 28 2001
Lampard is on the bench according to Sky

Paolo at 14:01:50 Wednesday March 28 2001
Getting very Irish on here today!

Let's get something VERY straight here - Harry has got us to 5th just ONCE, and that was in a season when one or two big clubs had lost the plot.

Keeping us in the top half of the table for three seasons is NOT a wonderful achievement, it is a basic starting point for any medium sized club. We should be aiming higher than that. And at the moment, Harry's wonderful stewardship - with "the best sqad we've had for 20 years" - has got us to the dizzyt heights of 14th (only missing 15th on goal difference), with only 8 games to go.

Compare and contrast with Taylor (1st year in Premiership management) at Leicester, Hoddle at Southampton (max att 10,000), Burley at Ipswich (first year back in Premier), Curbishley at Charlton (Charlton!)....

Harry is NOT a good manager. In fact, if you check through ALL the players he's bought and sold (and their impact on the team), he's not even very good at buying players.

OK, so there's the Academy (and it's a bloody good job there is!) - but what part does Harry play in that?

Face it, sentimentality apart, we could do a lot better with almost anyone else.

Time to face up to the truth - he's mediocre, and we need better than that.

Henry at 13:40:44 Wednesday March 28 2001
Leave our Harry alone. One dodgy season and drama queens are calling for his head. Well I think he deserves his 5 year contract. In fact I would make it 10 if I was on the board and let him sleep with the missus.

Tout at 13:09:42 Wednesday March 28 2001
We could post a advert saying that Harry's arse is for sale. The calls he receive might drive him out.

Ian in Dublin at 12:42:39 Wednesday March 28 2001
People, we need to chill. HR is not really setting the world alight at the moment but just think what would happen if he left. A new coach would probably see (it generally does) at least five regulars leave or be sold over the next four or five months to be replaced by nothing better. HR has stewarded the Irons to fifth and a number of successive top half finishes. The appalling vista is a Man City type situation, with new managers every twelve months. He may not quite be hitting the mark at the moment but for one would certainly give him next season to see what happens.

Mike the Hammer at 12:34:05 Wednesday March 28 2001
Soory orange,but I have never found the word 'tax' even faintly amusing.
Even worse when put into practice.

Fat Fred at 12:08:01 Wednesday March 28 2001
Further to my comments about libel on the 'net last week, have a look at this. I realise it's more extreme than anything ( most things ? ) printed on here but note the judges comment that Ł10,000 was "totally inadequate " OUCH ! Copyright todays Irish Times.

Man named business
rival in sex ad

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A man who advertised a woman on the Internet as a prostitute willing to perform various sexual acts has been remanded on bail for sentencing on May 11th.

Francis Kenny (40), of Knock Road, Ballyhaunis, Co Mayo, admitted posting the advertisement in relation to the woman, a business competitor, saying that he knew she would receive phone calls as a result which would probably cause her distress.

He had been charged under Section 12 of the Defamation Act, 1961.

At Castlebar Circuit Court, sitting in Westport, Sgt John Hynes said the defendant was a sandwich operator who traded mostly in Mayo and Connacht under the name Fresh Cuts.

His victim, Ms Maureen Walker, was in the same business, trading under the name Exclusive Sandwiches.

On March 6th, 2000, Kenny had placed an advertisement on the "Escort Ireland" website, which advertised prostitutes and the services they offered.

In the advertisement, which he titled "Exclusive.Maureen", he typed a letter giving her description, age, services she would be willing to perform and the prices she would charge.

The advertisement featured her mobile telephone number.

The afternoon after her number appeared Ms Walker received a call from a man asking if she operated throughout the west of Ireland.

She replied that she did.

The conversation continued for some time before she realised that there was some misunderstanding.

She told the man that she operated a sandwich business and he hung up.

Over the next two days Ms Walker received 100 calls from men inquiring about prostitution services.

Many of them became abusive when she told them the advertisement was erroneous.

On March 8th Ms Walker made a complaint to the Garda. Kenny at first denied any part in placing the advertisement, but later admitted it.

"It was a woman's worst nightmare, receiving a phone call from a man saying he was ringing because he required the services of a prostitute. From then on my phone never stopped ringing", Ms Walker told Judge Carroll Moran.

The judge said it was an appalling thing to have done.

Counsel for Kenny said that his client was not a man of great means, but he had managed to raise Ł10,000, which he had in court.

Judge Moran said the amount was totally inadequate.

It would not come near what a civil remedy for the case would amount to in an award of damages.

He adjourned the case until May 11th, placing the defendant on continuing bail provided that he handed the Ł10,000 in to court.

Orange at 11:37:24 Wednesday March 28 2001
Sorry, but the word "Orange" must be the least funny in the entire English language.

Barking Baz at 09:58:43 Wednesday March 28 2001
The Church Elm?

Mike the Hammer at 08:55:16 Wednesday March 28 2001
Hi U.S. Hammer
Greetings from the East of London.
Cant think of the pubs name you're after...

U.S. Hammer in Minnesota at 06:50:23 Wednesday March 28 2001
Hi all from the US of A!
Hey Dagenham Dave whats the name of the pub on the corner of Heathway and Hedgemans?
I used to hang out there in my youf:-)

dazza at 23:53:35 Tuesday March 27 2001
woops. the clock is wrong!

Dazza at 23:53:11 Tuesday March 27 2001
morning!!!

Dagenham Dave at 17:48:44 Tuesday March 27 2001
Hey! Albanian Boy ... How the f*ck have you got onto a Computer....???

Albanian Boy at 13:37:33 Tuesday March 27 2001
5th in Div 3. Good chance of reaching playoffs.

By the way, our boyz is gonna kick your asses tomorrow!!

Frank C at 11:57:25 Tuesday March 27 2001
I'd forgotten about Tommy Taylor, a good loyal servant in his day at Upt. No idea how he's getting on at the Orient..Anorak help required.

Derek at 09:54:54 Tuesday March 27 2001
Rio was at fault for that goal the Finns scored.Just glad that useless prick doesn't play for us no more. I was even more disturbed to here how easily he decided that he wanted to move to Leeds United. All hype surrounding his love of West Ham and having to wrench himself away from the club he loves turns out to be a load of tosh. Apparently he had made his mind up to go to Leeds within 10mins of talking to the Leeds chairman shortly after West Ham agreed to the Ł18m. I only hope Lee Bowyer and Woodgate give him a right kick-in.

Harry rumours - from KUMB at 09:53:49 Tuesday March 27 2001
Redknapp rumours rumble on [26/03/01]

Despite news of a new contract, rumours continue to persist about the future of Harry Redknapp as manager of West Ham United.

According to reports Redknapp is poised to put pen to paper on a lucrative new 5 year contract which will keep him tied to the club until 2006.

But strong rumours are insisting that the board are far from happy with Redknapp's recent performance, and if they are to be believed Redknapp's future as manager is far from certain.

Fans, and those at the club are far from happy with the team's performance so far this season. Despite boasts from Redknapp that the current squad is 'the best for 20 years' the Hammers lie on the brink of a relegation battle, and out of both domestic competitions following the recent FA Cup quarter-final defeat against local rivals Tottenham.

And the suggestion is that should the team's performance not improve dramatically by the end of the season the club are seriously considering bringing in a fresh management team to revive flagging fortunes.

Harry Redknapp has transformed the club since his arrival in 1994. From perennial strugglers he has turned West Ham United into serious European contenders, with one UEFA Cup campaign already under his belt.

But fans are becoming dissatisfied with the club's direction, and Redknapp is the main object of their frustration. Disgruntled supporters are growing in numbers, and Redknapp is being held as the man responsible for the club's stagnation.

So who would be the club's choice as ideal replacement for Redknapp? Certainly high on the list of contenders would be Alan Curbishley; a former Hammer who has worked minor miracles at Charlton. Other possibilities would be Tommy Taylor - another ex-Hammer - at Orient, and Stuart Pearce who has made no secret of his desire to return to a coaching role.

But despite the rumours, it would indeed be a shock if Redknapp were to receive his marching orders. At the moment we take them with a pinch of salt, but what's that old saying ... there's no smoke without fire?

* Expect a categorical denial of the above story from the club via the official website sometime tomorrow ...

Paolo at 09:46:38 Tuesday March 27 2001
Blimey, that's a bit deep for a Tuesday morning.

kc - Mahoo hasn't been on here for ages, more's the pity.

kc in Canada at 23:54:57 Monday March 26 2001
mahoola: I noted that you quoted "when you gain a lover, you begin to lose a friend" in June last year. This is actually the song that I am looking for. Would you please tell me the name of the song and the singer if you happen to know? Many thanks.

Dagenham Dave at 19:28:30 Monday March 26 2001
Hello fellow miserable pissed off with footie can't wait for the summer people...... Been a bit quiet of late due to some serious smoking ...nuff said. Was at Anfield on Saturday and Rio looked outta place... ha fucking ha!!

Paolo at 19:12:29 Monday March 26 2001
And exactly how many has 'King' Kanoute scored????

The Radiator at 12:56:17 Monday March 26 2001
Why don't radiator and Gladiator rhyme?

The Ladiator at 12:55:27 Monday March 26 2001
Yes indeed, but that was months ago. He hadn't scored for a good 8 or 9 games since Millwall.

Picky in Northampton at 12:52:40 Monday March 26 2001
By the way: Alf's clock is wrong.

Anorak in Northampton at 12:51:47 Monday March 26 2001
Yes: if he'd scored away to Millwall, he'd have equalled the all time record for scoring in consecutive games - I think it was about 12...

Frank C at 12:34:41 Monday March 26 2001
Well Mister Gladiator, Defoe has been banging them in for Bournemouth all season, nearly breaking somekind of goalscoring record (An anorak will confirm, I'm sure) Does that answer your question?

Ian in Northampton at 12:31:58 Monday March 26 2001
Russell: that would be the time before this one.

Russell crows at 12:28:55 Monday March 26 2001
Defoe scores AGAIN on Saturday? When was the last time before that?

er

er

er

er...

Frank C at 12:28:24 Monday March 26 2001
Kenny: What about that chef from the muppets...he bears an uncanny resemblence to H anyway!

Russell's Crow at 12:27:52 Monday March 26 2001
I said a while ago that Harry was right not to buy Tihinen for 4 million as he didn't look that good. Well, lo and behold I was right. The Finn looked pants on Saturday.

So much for people saying that we should have snapped him up quick before he impressed at Anfield!!!

Frank C at 12:26:36 Monday March 26 2001
Excellent, H signs new contract, confirms he's only interested in over 30's strikers. Also farms out our best prospects to the lower divisions (Defoe scores AGAIN on Saturday) and we're not far from relegation land. Maybe just maybe someone should pay Guy Ritchie (topical, topical, oscars and all that) enough money to entice him into the movies, that was he'll have found his true vocation and we'll stand a chance of getting a change at the top - or bottom as it may turn out.

Kenny in Stanford Le Hope at 12:23:37 Monday March 26 2001
I reckon West Ham should do themselves a favour and do what the FA did, bring in a swede who knows what he's doing. Bjorn Borg, Ingrid Bergman, Benni from Abba...anyone who knows more than Harry.

Paolo at 12:16:16 Monday March 26 2001
The Paolo Depression Scale:

1. Very happy
2. Moderately happy
3. OK
4. Not too good
5. Rather depressed
6. Very depressed
7. Suicidal
8. West Ham fan

Bazooka Button at 07:24:00 Monday March 26 2001
Um, so why was Harry on his own site last month saying that he had already signed this deal?

Someone's telling porkies...

Caroline embarrassed to admite to reading the Sunday tabloids at 22:34:27 Sunday March 25 2001
'WEST HAM manager Harry Redknapp will sign a new five-year deal, worth pounds 6m next week.

As first revealed in Hotline, talks have been on-going with Redknapp and, despite plunging worryingly towards a relegation battle, terms have been agreed. No.2 Frank Lampard will also commit himself to the club for the next five years.

Redknapp will be given about pounds 10m to spend in the summer with his priority a top-class striker. Redknapp wants to sign Les Ferdinand from Spurs and is also interested in Manchester United's Teddy Sheringham - but must persuade the board to invest in another player over 30. The rest of the pounds 18m fee received for Rio Ferdinand going towards a training ground revamp. West Ham are set to compete for Spanish striker Javi Moreno, who has scored 18 goals in 27 games this season.

Redknapp and Lampard were impressed when they personally checked Moreno but know they face competition from Fiorentina, Valencia and Middlesbrough.'

I think our esteemed manager is also on A Question Of Sport this week.

STEVE in BRISTOL at 20:31:10 Sunday March 25 2001
Harry if you read this go now with some pride now if not punch Mr Brown in the face! bring in VIALLI maybe with his sence he meight try and get Matt Elliot Titus Bramble bring back Hannu Tihinen and go for a top striker Henrik Larsson The money is in the pot just spend it!

Paolo - at the weekend at 12:49:59 Sunday March 25 2001
Just thought I'd double the number of weekend postings!

Very mixed feelings watching Rio yesterday. It's clear now that that's where our season went wrong. It didn't feel like it at the time because Leeds had a bad patch and, for a brief while, we did OK. But looking back it's blindingly obvious that we should never have sold Rio. #18m does not make up for the damage that decision has caused the club and our future.

Unless he manages to redeam himself in the summer and next season, by using that money wisely (and I suspect he won't), I think H's career is effectively over. Selling Rio will turn out to be the mistake that finished him, that showed him up for what he is - a gambler, not a manager. He'd rather cash in his chips than build for the future.

Mo Hican at 11:01:46 Saturday March 24 2001
Saw Stuart Pearce last night at the Still Little Fingers gig , pogoing like a nutter , no injury problems there then?

U.H.H at 16:49:04 Friday March 23 2001
Now off for a couple of weeks to move house,good luck to the boy's against Everton.........
I FUCKIN' HATE FOOTBALL.

Boss Button at 12:34:29 Friday March 23 2001
So the World Cup is stupid now, is it?

No more stupid that losing 1-0 at home to Ipswich, I s'pose.

Frank C at 10:52:27 Friday March 23 2001
Why is the league stopped because of these stupid international matches...lets be honest who gives a bollocks anyway..??

TerryTTT at 18:41:48 Thursday March 22 2001
This may be a repeat because I don't know what happened to my last posting!! Thanks FF - good advice and I will note it. However, I still BELIEVE that HR is a moronic waste of space and I am still of the OPINION that more lies behind his absurd dealings than bargain hunting alone. Whatever, he is either sacked bloody soon or we are finished - and that is fact!

TerryTTT at 18:36:42 Thursday March 22 2001
Fat Fred, thanks that is good advice. OK, everything I have said is my OPINION. I still THINK that HR is a moron and I am still of the OPINION that more lies behind his dealings than bargain hunting alone. Whatever, the sooner we are rid of him the better (opinion!!!)

FF at 17:36:21 Thursday March 22 2001
Phil Gilchrist Leicester to West Brom, Ł500,000
Lee Matthews Leeds United to Bristol City, Ł70,000
Cameron Stuart York City to Aston Villa, Ł50,000
Liam Ridgewell West Ham to Aston Villa, nominal
Kevin Gall Newcastle to Bristol Rovers, free
Tommy Williams West Ham to Gillingham, free
Jamie Milligan Everton to Blackpool, free
Neil Midgley Ipswich to Barnet, free
Alex O'Reilly West Ham to Bristol Rovers, free
Andy Goram Motherwell to Man United, loan
Stephen Broad Chelsea to Southend, loan
Warren Cummings Chelsea to West Brom, loan
Ashley Dodd Manchester United to Port Vale, loan
Morten Hyldgaard Coventry to Grimsby, loan
Trond Soltvedt Southampton to Sheffield Wednesday, undisclosed
Gareth Taylor Manchester City to Burnley, loan
Kemi Izzet Charlton to Colchester, loan
Sam Parkin Chelsea to Oldham, loan
Andy Morrison Manchester City to Sheffield Utd, loan
Chris Shuker Manchester City to Macclesfield, loan
Shaun Byrne West Ham to Colchester, loan
Stuart Ripley Southampton to Sheffield Wednesday, loan
Peter Crookes Liverpool to Halifax, loan
Christian Hanson Middlesbrough to Cambridge, loan

Fat Fred at 17:32:55 Thursday March 22 2001
Probably not.

Dazza at 15:54:15 Thursday March 22 2001
SAMASSI ABOU
(Martigues, Lyon, Cannes, West Ham United, AC Ajaccio)
1991-present

THEN: A true favourite of West Ham's fans, Samassi Abou was admired for his weaving runs and pace which looked very effective but created few goals for him at the London club. The Ivory Coast international then had unsuccessful loan periods at Ipswich Town, Walsall and Kilmarnock before being released by the Hammers in the Summer of 2000.

NOW: It was hard to track him down after that because, as we found out, his name is actually Abou Samassi but an error in his registration at the FA has seen his name switched to what we all know him as.

Abou, 27, has gone back to France and is now playing at Second Division AC Ajaccio. He has made 23 appearances so far this season and he scored his first goal three weeks ago (Feb 7) when Ajaccio beat Wasquehal 2-0. For a striker, his goalscoring isn't outstanding to say the least - he has played 158 games and has netted just 18 times.

Harry the Dog at 15:46:34 Thursday March 22 2001
Tony Cottee joins the South London turds

Paolo at 13:35:13 Thursday March 22 2001
FF - what about if I write "TtTT - is it true that Fat Fred interferes with kids?" - is that libelous??

Fat Fred at 13:18:18 Thursday March 22 2001
T TTT, it was a website in Ireland, www.shannonrfc.com is the address. If you say " I think Fat Fred is a w**ker" that is opinion and not libelous, if however you say " Fat Fred interferes with kids" or "Fat Fred takes bribes" that is definitely worth a few quid to me if I choose to go to court about it. The site and its owners are responsible and I could alway take a case against you personally if I tracked you down through your ISP address. Even if you use a PC at work, the chances are that your IT dept has some kind of logon recording system, not only would you have to pay me a few quid, you might well lose your job as well. Not trying to put a damper on the slagging that goes on, just asking people to aware of exactly what you are saying. So Endeth the first lesson.........

Pĺ Ölo at 12:38:44 Thursday March 22 2001
According to Soccerupdate.com, Villa have been found guilty by a tribunal of poaching 17-year-old Liam Ridgewell from West Ham. They have been ordered to make nominal payments.

What goes around, comes around...

Paolo at 12:28:05 Thursday March 22 2001
Anyone ever heard of Liam Ridgewell? Apparently we've just sold him to Villa.

Grandstand at 12:08:09 Thursday March 22 2001
Why should I when I have you to do it for me?

Dazza at 10:44:38 Thursday March 22 2001
Why all the different names Baz, are you so embarrassed about sticking yer name down on Alfs ????

The Planetarium at 10:22:41 Thursday March 22 2001
So while every other site is buzzing with Harry Out and Doobs, this one gets 9 posts of which 4 are by the same person and 3 are blank!

Time for an advertising campaign to resusitate Alf's before it goes the same way as West Ham under Deadcrap?

Paolo - on the night shift at 00:20:54 Thursday March 22 2001
Dean - are you Dagenham Dave in disguise???

dean at 21:39:05 Wednesday March 21 2001

dean at 21:37:47 Wednesday March 21 2001
is curbishley to replace rednapp

dean in a pretty place at 21:34:05 Wednesday March 21 2001

dean at 21:31:40 Wednesday March 21 2001

Andyk in Midlands at 15:40:14 Wednesday March 21 2001
Dailly, todorov,song,camara, not woth Ł500,000 the lot of em, whatever next?

Frank C at 13:13:10 Wednesday March 21 2001
Exactly!

Brickbat at 11:53:30 Wednesday March 21 2001
So all that unparalleled success under Bonzo was really due to Harry! Blimey!

Frank C at 11:29:49 Wednesday March 21 2001
I seem to remember the reason H took over from Bonzo was that he was THE coaching genius mastermind behind the scenes....Just shows what a complete load of bollocks you can believe sometimes.

Penelope Canteloupe at 08:20:20 Wednesday March 21 2001
Interesting point about Cole, Carrick and FLJ now hjaving a week with proper coaches. Add to that the chats they will have with Rio (who will tell them how awed he is by the new regime of O'Leary and Kidd who OOZE success) and our young boys will start thinking they can do a lot better than working with Deadcrap.

The Club is disintegrating before our eyes.

Dazza at 23:49:34 Tuesday March 20 2001
**** it , we are taken to court then I'm dragging you lot down wiv me!

TerryTTT at 21:02:24 Tuesday March 20 2001
Fat Fred, interesting point you make. Which Rugby site was it? In the interests of keeping this great site alive, and not wishing to plunge its owners into court, I will refrain from such outbursts in future (no matter how true I believe they are). Point remains, HR is a catastrophically shit manager (is that libellous) who is almost single-handedly destroying WHU. He is pissing players off ad-nauseum and is leading us, almost lemming-like, over the edge into oblivion. Joe Cole and the others must be so relieved to be out of his clutches for a week and in the company of REAL coaches. Naturally, they will mix with the succesful, including Rio; then, what have thay got to look forward to on return to UP. A divided and despondant rabble, with a complete fucking Muppet in charge of a back-room full of cowboys - and don't dare make one mistake, or the Muppet will show outstanding man-management and loyalty and castigate you in front of the nations media. Great reasons for staying at UP I think not. Still, once all the 'gooduns' have gone, Muppet can have his wish and relish in the relegation of his 'rejects' and 'renegades'. I hope that is not too libellous!!

Dazza at 17:22:21 Tuesday March 20 2001
In, out, in out shake 'em all about

Ton Up Teddy at 17:21:15 Tuesday March 20 2001
Curbishley IN...Redknapp OUT.

Dazza at 16:18:55 Tuesday March 20 2001
;o)

BOZEAT BOUND at 16:18:44 Tuesday March 20 2001
IAN IN NORTHAMPTON; Give me a call 01908 580229 [9-5].

Mike the Hammer at 15:57:33 Tuesday March 20 2001
Daz,true,we had a very civilised chat last Saturday mate.And you want to get to know my better half a whole lot more......

Dazza at 15:18:59 Tuesday March 20 2001
I am nice to you all!!!!!

Frank C at 15:01:56 Tuesday March 20 2001
I ask again ' Whatever happened to Harold Smith' If you lived through the late seventies and are musically inclined as well as loving a good yarn, get this video immediately.
Excellent stuff...

test in here at 14:28:04 Tuesday March 20 2001

The Source in the sauce at 14:21:27 Tuesday March 20 2001
In which case Dazza had better start being nice to us all!!

Fat Fred at 14:11:03 Tuesday March 20 2001
This site, it's owners and operators would be liable for any libelous postings on it. It happened to a rugby site I know of, someone posted something naughty and the smelly stuff hit the revolving object.

The Source at 14:06:00 Tuesday March 20 2001
Fred: Could you really sue someone called Terry the Tosh Talker for libel? Doubt if it would stand up in court.

Fat Fred at 13:59:23 Tuesday March 20 2001
Vote for GG sucksessor at Spurs, Chas & Dave are leading at the mo. http://www.football365.com/poll/multipoll/

Dazza at 13:57:05 Tuesday March 20 2001
MSG to SS in S - and you read it first on manglers Baz!!!

Fat Fred in work at 13:52:19 Tuesday March 20 2001
Terry TTT's posting on saturday at 18.29.30 might be a bit on the libelous ( check spelling) side ? Wouldn't like to see Alf in court !!!!

Swedish Soothsayer in Sweden (funnily enough) at 13:48:19 Tuesday March 20 2001
Harry out by the End of the season, possibly end of the week.

Curbishley to come in for next term.

You read it here first.

Ronan at 12:59:42 Tuesday March 20 2001
Boo Hoo Hoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok I have to be honest I allways had only the best of respect fo HR,but while he has faired well he will never take us those few steps farther....upstairs and in with Curb's,a WHU man and all!!

Frank C at 12:35:15 Tuesday March 20 2001
I'd live with one or two shownmen, and I'd probably argue that PDC has his good days of grafting and shows 100% commitement. There's always a price to pay for brilliance...Hagi, Baggio, Romario and the like are all great players who have got results for their teams. Why even that twat cantona was as lazy as they come...talk to any Scum fan and they love him...+

in in at at 12:31:03 Tuesday March 20 2001
Hmm

Frank C at 12:28:18 Tuesday March 20 2001
Ian: I was hoping not to mention the Scum red nose bastard who has managed to achieve the entertainment with results scenario. It's not only the Northern twats who have acheived this , look at the really great teams of the past two or three decades...Milan, Barcelona, Real etc....all their fans rightly demand a level of football with results, there is no compromise. Rightly so managers drop like flies if they don't deliver. We have a great tradition and all that, as fans we support them 'cause we love to see PDC, cole and the like in full flow...the point is, it is achievable the West Ham way...we just haven't found the right mix of players to do it....and for sure the right manager.

Florin Apples at 12:27:58 Tuesday March 20 2001
Ian: The most successful sides of recent times have been attractive too - ManU, Arsenal in 1998, the Newcastle teams of Keegan, France and Holland and Brazil in the World Cup, Fulham in Div 1. I could go on.

Dinosaur football is out but who knows if GG might not add some steel to our silk? He would certainly out those who do not graft (PDC, Kanoute are in the Ginola mould) and would therefore retain Carrick and Cole and Lamps. A midfield featuring those 3 plus a doughty back 4 and a top marksman (rather than lazy, over-elaborating shwomen) could well give us the success we crave.

Ian in Northampton at 11:53:03 Tuesday March 20 2001
Frank C: the argument of 'good football' vs 'winning' got a good airing in the period after GG got the sack. Most commentators indicated that this was bullshit and that, while in an ideal world you'd have good football AND a winning team, the average Spurs fan, given a choice, would go for 'winning'. Are we any different? Which of us can say, hand on heart, that if we had to choose we'd go for an entertaining side rather than a winning, successful side? Or am I entirely missing the point of being a Hammers fan - after all, it does take a special kind of masochism.... (This argument is, of course, based on the precept that you can't have both - taking as examples the Wimbledon side of a few years back, Arsenal etc. who have been successful but not pretty. However, possibly the thing that pisses me off most is that Man Utd have managed to have their cake AND eat it...)

A very pissed off fan. in Kent at 11:04:48 Tuesday March 20 2001
I see Svetoslav Todorov was voted our man of the match against Ipswich. Little consolation I know, but he has impressed me with his performances lately. Thats until Harry slates him in front of the media. Poor Joe Cole, his confidence couldn't be any lower after what Harry did to him. Do yerself a favour mate, go play for Manu, Liverpool or Arsenal. So long as Harry is in charge, you'll be wasted.

Kev in Barking at 10:58:11 Tuesday March 20 2001
S o what happened to Harry's prediction that we would be in the top half of the Premiership by the end of the season? When we were at the bottom of the Premiership at the beginning of the season alarms bells should have been ringing. Harry is a top bloke, with a great sense of humour and is one of the lads...but so is Jack Dee but I wouldn't want him managing WHU. I like the idea of Alan Curbishley taking over. Spurs are trying to lure him away, but I think his heart is set in the East End. We thrashed them 5-0 on Boxing day and yet they bounced back under his management. We get beaten and it seems to take an eternity to turn us around under Harry Redknapp. Which only goes to show his poor management skills.

Frank C at 10:52:11 Tuesday March 20 2001
Move him upstairs, has to be the right move. Who to bring in is the real challange. All the usual suspects will not do...Whats the job spec???

- Some connection to West Ham an advantage but not essential.
- Will understand that we (the fans) will demand pure football..in other words a passing game with flair and entertainment an essential make up of the play. the trick is to combine that with winning ways.
Lets be honest, if H had a suitable replacement for RIO we wouldn't be in this mess. Why did we sell Rio? I mean the replacements who took his place are either over the top or a pure waste of the transfer money.
Now what other job do you know were a manager would get rid of a prime asset and replace the asset with inferior product
, reduce the output dramatically, lose money through lost revenue and still live remain in the same position.
You've been cheeky, sometimes entertaining, a good wheeler and dealer, sometimes made money, but H you've outstayed your usefullness, don't be rememebered as a complete Tosser. leave now while we can just about smile at the mention of your name.

Harry's email address at 07:53:10 Tuesday March 20 2001
Tell him you want him out!!!

Mike the Hammer at 07:44:51 Tuesday March 20 2001
Daz,you nwever know yer luck mate!

Beefcake at 07:26:03 Tuesday March 20 2001
West Ham 33/1 for the drop.

With any luck we will lose our next few games and that way force Harry out. Not the ideal scenario but the man has to go before it's too late. A FLS/SP caretaker duo will keep us up and we'll have Vialli for the new season.

And then it will be up, up and away!

Frank C at 23:24:00 Monday March 19 2001
Whatever happened to Harold Smith??
Far more interesting, than the other Harold!

Dagenham Dave at 21:47:50 Monday March 19 2001
too depressed to get bothered about it...
If we go down ..... then fuck it.
Toke anyone...?

Paolo - very depressed at 18:08:13 Monday March 19 2001
Finally steeled myself to look at the table, and it's not a pretty sight. Anyone who thinks we're safe from a relegation battle had better think again.

For a start, we're only 14th on goal difference - Derby, yes DERBY, are on the same points as us. And Everton and Boro are only a win and a draw from going above us. We are TWO games away from being 17th - one place above relegation.

And check out the fixture list. In theory, as we're playing the 6 clubs around us (2 above and 4 below), there's nothing to worry about - as it's in our hands - a few good results, perhaps even as few as 6 points, and we're OK.

But the way we're playing, we're easy meat at home to Leeds and Southampton (yes, Southampton, that's how bad it's got - they are 6 places and NINE points above us, with a game in hand). And our other two home fixtures are against Everton and Derby, both teams who will be fighting for their survival, so a home win for either of those looks unlikely.

And away we've got Villa and Newcastle, and the way we're playing, you can forget both those, even with our improved away record this season (that was before things went down the toilet). Then there's Man City, who will also be fighting for survival, and then, of course, our final game of the season, immediately following our humiliating home defeat against Southampton (who could be challenging for a European place by then!), is Boro.

A final game of the season relegation battle - away.

And if you think all that is bollocks, you obviously weren't at the game Saturday. Just tell me where even six points are going to come from from that lot? Two draws at home, if we're lucky, and maybe a surprise away win - that's 5 points max - and hello Division One football.

Ian in Northampton at 16:46:39 Monday March 19 2001
UHH: in that case, I perhaps ought to welcome you to The Red Lion that evening. Will you be up for a pint around 8:00 on moving-in day?

U.H.H at 16:28:37 Monday March 19 2001
I cant even bring myself to write anthing constructive.
A couple of good results for Derby/Boro/Everton and we are seriously in the shit.
Does anyone else see where this miraculous turn around is gonna come from?
Ian; how are you? i will be moving in on 31st.

Dazza at 16:18:07 Monday March 19 2001
Mike, any chance of getting to know yer missus ??? :o)

Del at 15:52:18 Monday March 19 2001
Yep, In 2 seasons time we'll have the best empty first division ground in the country.

Lenny at 15:47:58 Monday March 19 2001
What makes me sick is that I don't think half the team gives a fuck. Most of them are wide-boys who are out on the piss or gambling on their days off. They demand high salaries and honestly couldn't give a fuk. While we fork out Ł40 a ticket just to get a glimpse of these over-paid prima-donnas take advantage of our loyalty to the cause. I mean think about it. We're fuking mugs really. There we are every saturday afternoon out of pocket for the privelge of watching a bunch of under-acheivers on 20-30k a week, applauding when they wave at us, singing their names, trwating them like gods. When in fact it should be them applauding us for putting up with this diabolicle crap.
Its pathetic and they should hold their head in shame. I don't know how any one of them could look at their fans in the face and feel guilty about the money they steal from us every week. PS. The new stands looking alright!!

Del at 13:19:45 Monday March 19 2001
Of the list I would prefer Hoddle, although the chances are that he will close the disabled supporters enclosure!.
Tactically sound and we could do with the divine intervention. Mind you, I think we've got a few more years of HR to come yet.

Oh BUGGER!

Mike the Hammer at 13:03:14 Monday March 19 2001
I'd prefer Dick Advocaat to GG.Shot put......

Mike the Hammer at 13:02:00 Monday March 19 2001
Dazza,did I see week...I meant night....:o))

Pernilla Primm at 13:00:03 Monday March 19 2001
George would sort them loafers out, that's for certain.

Ian in Northampton at 12:45:18 Monday March 19 2001
So: H is tactically naive, not a clue etc. etc. Would we rather George the Gooner? Discuss....

Dazza at 12:38:51 Monday March 19 2001
So now I know why you're going to Canada!!!

Mike the Hammer at 12:24:38 Monday March 19 2001
I'd settle for being blown in a grand way 3 or 4 times a week....

Mack at 12:06:32 Monday March 19 2001
Something to think about when you get your season ticket renewal soon - Mr D Suker has taken to the West End casino society in a big way , he is a regular in several clubs and is known to blow several grand 3 or 4 times a week.

come get some!!! at 11:25:16 Monday March 19 2001
come on you tractor boys

what a load of rubbish!!! in la la land at 11:21:22 Monday March 19 2001
we want redknapp out say we want redknapp out!!!
we want redknapp out say we want redknapp out!!!
we want redknapp out say we want redknapp out!!!

Garnish the Gripplehorn at 08:59:24 Monday March 19 2001
Candidates to take over for Harold:

Vialli
Graham
Advocaat
Moyles
Hoddle
Keegan
Aldridge
Marcello Lippi
Arrigo Sacchi
Alberto Malesani

Just a pity Christoph Daum recently signed for Besiktas.

Dagenham Dave at 21:07:59 Sunday March 18 2001
Sorry.

Dagenham Dave's Mum at 21:07:29 Sunday March 18 2001
Pack it in the pair of you

Dagenham Dave at 21:07:02 Sunday March 18 2001
Dad? Is that you?? Where the f*ck have you been???

Dagenham Dave's Dad at 21:06:27 Sunday March 18 2001
Dave, son, you're ramblin'

Dagenham Dave at 21:05:52 Sunday March 18 2001
Good olde days eh....

Dagenham Dave at 21:05:24 Sunday March 18 2001
remember when we we're good......3.26 4 Sept 1927 i think it was

Dagenham Dave at 21:03:41 Sunday March 18 2001
we're shit at the moment then eh...?

Paolo at 01:55:17 Sunday March 18 2001
Dazza - that just about sums it up.

What a load of bollocks.

Dave iP - you walked right past me TWICE this afternoon!!!

Dazza at 18:54:34 Saturday March 17 2001
I think the worse thing than actually losing today was the fact that we lost to a side who showed us how to play football.
Ipswich are a team of no superstars or flair players, but their organisation, workrate and passing was awesome, compaired to us who were shite, lethargic, uninterested and could produce a shot on target in 90 minutes.
A ****in disgrace.

TerryTTT at 18:29:30 Saturday March 17 2001
An unadulterated farce - that is all we are. That filthy scumbag Redknapp will never leave - he will see us into the fucking third division as long as he is getting a salary. He is a liar and undoubtedly a bung-taking crook, (which is why we end up with evrybody elses shit at UP). No matter how much money the fucking board gave him, he would still buy crap as long as his back pocket is being filled. Well, until he goes thats it - I simply cannot stand the utter frustration and anger that that fucking moron generates. Fuck paying the prices to see that shit!!!

stagman in scotland at 17:46:08 Saturday March 17 2001
fuck off english scum

East Midlands Hammerw at 17:41:24 Saturday March 17 2001
what the fuck is going on we lost again
this bollocks Harry fuck off we wont win anything as long
as you are manager

Dave in Happy Spur at 17:36:04 Saturday March 17 2001
Get the Gooner Graham while he's goin' (he might even win you the Worthless)

Andy in a pile of poo!!!!!! at 16:56:43 Saturday March 17 2001
well what now ???????????????????????????

Dave iP at 11:56:30 Saturday March 17 2001
Oh yeah, Happy Paddy's Day to one and all!

Dave iP at 11:55:19 Saturday March 17 2001
Come on, it's about time we sorted this fucking season out, starting with kicking the soi-disant "tractor-fuckers" arses. Let's 'ave it! COME ON YOU IRRRROOOOONNNNSNSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS: YYZ is still one of the best bits of music ever. Check out that drum solo! (Sad old proggie that I am!)

Paolo - in quadruple (or possibly not!) at 11:24:31 Saturday March 17 2001
I think this is my fourth posting today, but I still can't see any of them!

This Freeserve 'Hometime' is a pile of stinky poo.

PS - the new Divine Comedy CD (which I am listening to as I write this) is excellent, takes a few listens to appreciate it, and sounds like a Radio Head tribute band in places, but it's well worth persevering with. Don't buy it if you liked National Express and Something in the Woodshed, though!

Paolo - at the weekend at 11:18:09 Saturday March 17 2001
Interesting summary of Harry's transfers this season on KUMB - see:

http://www.westhamunited-fc.co.uk/articles/howlett022.shtml

Nik - I wish we could post proper links!!

Paolo at 10:44:50 Saturday March 17 2001
Nik - where is the Barking Dog?!

Paolo at 10:44:11 Saturday March 17 2001
Just checked the table and realised we can't win the championship.

Ho hum.

Niki at 19:18:43 Friday March 16 2001
Seeing as you haven't asked, tomorrow I shall mostly be drinking in the Barking Dog.

Niki at 19:15:21 Friday March 16 2001
Haven't had the heart to face footie this week, but the delightful news that George the Gooner has been sacked and is gonna sue the Spirtz has rattled my cage!!

Come On You Irons tomorrow!! Let's finish the season with a bit of dignity left.

daniel brogan in at home at 18:08:48 Friday March 16 2001
very good

U.H.H in a Football depression. at 17:24:38 Friday March 16 2001
Finally a bit of good news in this truly depressing week. but why could'nt he have been sacked before last sunday? if you will all excuse me im going to climb back into the bottle i've been living in since sunday night.

Paolo at 16:45:04 Friday March 16 2001
Unfortunately he probably would. But I couldn't take that, and I don't suppose he'd want it anyway

Fat Fred at 16:18:16 Friday March 16 2001
Would George Graham be better than 'Arry ??

Dazza at 15:35:56 Friday March 16 2001
more importantly... Totts to div 1 ????

Paolo at 15:33:28 Friday March 16 2001
Hoddle to Spurs, Keegan to Southampton, Southampton to Div 1!! Yes, oh yes!

Terminator at 15:16:03 Friday March 16 2001
Harry - Send off yer CV pronto!!!!!!

Pottery Lesion at 15:04:16 Friday March 16 2001
Spurs sack Graham

George Graham's stormy White Hart Lane reign is over

Tottenham Hotspur George Graham has parted company with the club.
He was summoned to an emergency meeting with Spurs executive vice-chairman David Buchler and was told that the club could no longer work with him.

It follows Graham revealing at a press conference details of his meeting this week with Tottenham's new owners Enic.

Buchler said: "I had a private meeting with George Graham and David Pleat this week and then found details of it plastered across the press.
"I called George in for an explanation and asked for an explanation. However no explanation was forthcoming and he had a defiant attitude.

"I am building from top to bottom a cohesive team and this is a difficult time for the club with a semi-final coming up and negotiations with players over contracts.

"We agreed we cannot work with each other. I am not prepared to have someone who is not a team player and who is not looking after the club's interests."

Pottery Lesion at 15:03:52 Friday March 16 2001
Spurs sack Graham

George Graham's stormy White Hart Lane reign is over

Tottenham Hotspur George Graham has parted company with the club.
He was summoned to an emergency meeting with Spurs executive vice-chairman David Buchler and was told that the club could no longer work with him.

It follows Graham revealing at a press conference details of his meeting this week with Tottenham's new owners Enic.

Buchler said: "I had a private meeting with George Graham and David Pleat this week and then found details of it plastered across the press.
"I called George in for an explanation and asked for an explanation. However no explanation was forthcoming and he had a defiant attitude.

"I am building from top to bottom a cohesive team and this is a difficult time for the club with a semi-final coming up and negotiations with players over contracts.

"We agreed we cannot work with each other. I am not prepared to have someone who is not a team player and who is not looking after the club's interests."

Terminator at 14:59:47 Friday March 16 2001
Bye bye Mr Graham - ho ho ho

Frank C at 14:57:36 Friday March 16 2001
Paolo: That's because we're off for paddies day bank holiday on Monday...mind you all the parades are cancelled because of some foot and mouth thingy.....

Pan Flowers at 14:21:17 Friday March 16 2001
I disagree with everything you have said.

Paolo at 14:20:44 Friday March 16 2001
You sound happy today, Frank!

Frank C at 14:18:43 Friday March 16 2001
So there you have it, let me the first to proclaim Sven ‘ Swede’ Ericson a wanker and sell out. After the euphoria of the Spain performance and the impending media hype over the new Scandinavian messiah. Who is now seen as a cool dude and unflustered, uninfluenced own mind type person. Is in fact a clone of red nose day Ferguson.
Following in the aspirations of the Scotch git to take over the World by sticking Scum players in every team possible.
Of course Cole, carrick and FLJ haven’t a hope in hell of making the national team when there are arse busting dickheads available from the capitalist Mecca of the North. Bring back Ron Greenwood!

Frank C at 14:07:47 Friday March 16 2001
Tony: for you there are only sad memories of yesterday, and the sad fact that Irving ' wanker' Scholar and Twat Sugar played a large part in developing the current money orientated development of the game we love so well......Hourding money and Totts...now there's a surprise

From 365 at 14:06:56 Friday March 16 2001
JOE COLE TO BE DROPPED

One Of Four Players To Join Under-21s, Say FA Sources

By Sarah Winterburn

JOE COLE will be one of four members of Sven-Goran Eriksson's first squad to be relegated to the England Under-21 set-up ahead of next Saturday's clash with Finland, Football365 has learned from senior FA sources.

Instead of facing the senior Finnish side, Cole will be named alongside West Ham team-mate Carrick and Sunderland midfielder Gavin McCann in the side to face the Finnish Under-21 side in the qualifying competition for their European Championship.

This follows a terrible performance from Howard Wilkinson's Under-21 side in their friendly against Spain earlier this month. Eriksson has taken the decision to beef up that squad rather than call up the youngsters for his senior side.

As he intends cutting his squad down to just 25 players for the World Cup qualifiers against Finland on Saturday and Albania four days later, it makes sense that he should cull players who can be of use elsewhere.

Paolo at 13:29:55 Friday March 16 2001
According to the IP address thingy you're Tony in Dublin, not Tottenham!

Tony at 13:17:07 Friday March 16 2001
Paolo,
For you lot there is no tomorrow....

Tony in Tottenham at 13:16:00 Friday March 16 2001
Recovered yet chaps?

Paolo at 13:15:05 Friday March 16 2001
Bit quiet on here today. Anyone got any thoughts about tomorrow?

DiP at 11:13:03 Friday March 16 2001
And the Mancs will play Bayern Munich in the CL 1/4 finals, so...

"Always look on the runway for ice, doo-doo, de-doo-de-doo-de-doo..."

Del at 09:05:50 Friday March 16 2001
Harry adds:

"We've sold Rio, and that will be about it, surely.

"We have to add to these players, and the that is the key to keeping these good youngsters at the club; they want to see that we are going places.

"I have a few in mind but getting them will not be easy.

"Good players do not come cheap - with cheap ones you are taking gambles all the time.

"If you spend peanuts you get monkeys."

Is he taking the f#cking mickey or what!

Paolo - wishing he'd put his watch back on after shaving at 01:33:25 Friday March 16 2001
Christ, I didn't realise it was that late!!!

Paolo - on the night shift at 01:26:29 Friday March 16 2001
Anyone else having trouble getting KUMB? I thought it was our ruddy server/firewall at work, but I get the 'forbidden' page at home as well.

tony andrews at 00:04:06 Friday March 16 2001

Niki at 22:02:57 Thursday March 15 2001
http://www.dreamleague.com/comicrelief/

Paolo, Alf had an e-mail from the Site owner asking for a link!!!

Paolo at 21:44:58 Thursday March 15 2001
Daz - I believe every word...

Nik - how exactly did you find that site?!

Dazza at 20:53:26 Thursday March 15 2001
There is a book that has been written by Victoria and David beckam's ex-bodyguard that they are trying to have a certain part of banned from publication. This is not a joke or bullshit, this is the actual chapter that is causing all the problem's. ControversyCorner.com is able to exclusively reveal the detail of the extract from a forthcoming novel which is presently at the centre of a major legal wrangle in the United Kingdom. The novel, written by David and Victora Beckham's former bodyguard, allegedly contains 290 words which the couple find objectionable and are seeking to have suppressed by the court. ControversyCorner.com was approached this week by a broker acting for an insider at the publishing house for the forthcoming novel with an offer to sell a copy of the manuscript in question. We initially balked at the six-figure price the broker has asked for the text, but after seeing the first sentence of the disputed manuscript we immediately bought exclusive rights to the shocking document. The Extract in Dispute: Posh Goes to Hospital

"Posh and David's sex play became more and more kinky as their courtship progressed - while on tour it was not out of the ordinary to be sent out at night to buy personal lubricant, fruit and veg and spicy sex toys for the couple's randy sex romps. But things got totally out of control on a visit to Los Angeles in early 1998 when David was giving Posh a champagne enema in the spa of their swanky hotel suite. Posh apparently slipped over after a magnum of Bollinger had been inserted in her anus and cracked the bottle on the edge of the spa. The result was catastrophic colon perforation. She had a long jagged shard of glass protruding from her backside and was bleeding like a stuck pig. At first Beckham tried to reassure her that there was no need to go to hospital and that the end of the bottle would exit through her system normally. Unfortunately Beckham is not much of a medical expert and Posh passed out from loss of blood and shock within 30 minutes. When we finally got the call for help from David he claimed that he knew nothing about how Posh had injured herself. He just stood there looking very shifty. Eventually David allowed us to call an ambulance. Within an hour of tearing her chocolate spider, Posh was on the operating table at Cedars Sinai Hospital where she received 65 stitches and three pints of blood. When the anethstetic finally wore off, Posh was furious that Beckham had not admitted putting the bottle inside her. She ordered me to forcibly remove Beckham from the hospital and take away his credit cards. It was a pleasure to kick that lousy prick out on his arse. The forthcoming novel, due for release in October 2000, is now at the centre of a legal wrangle in the UK courts. According to Manchester United insiders, 'Backdoor Dave' Beckham is reportedly concerned that the taunts and jeers he regularly receives at football matches will get worse if the extract in question is published. On a number of occasions this year Beckham has been visibly shaken by taunts from the crowd of "does your wife like it up the arse?", a cruel reference to the rumors which have circulated around London since the incident. Punted out of hospital for perforating Posh's ring muscle .

Our interview with the editor of the manuscript reveals that Posh Spice was unable to perform for two weeks while the stitches were in, and the scandal threatened to disrupt unity among the other members of her band. According to ex Spice Girl Geri Halliwell the incident contributed to her decision to leave the famous group. "After all, there is nothing posh about having a bottle stuck up your arse" said Halliwell. "Her sex life was just out of control and I begged her to never see Beckham again, but she would not listen" she said. The couple are believed to have kissed and made up after Beckham promised to refrain from any sex games involving any form of fruit, vegetable or inanimate object. Jennifer Mullins, one of Posh Spice's closest friends, said she was shocked when the couple got back together. "That dirty bugger almost killed her by not calling an ambulance immediately after the accident. She almost bled to death on that bathroom floor. Its disgusting." said Mullins.

ControversyCorner.com contacted Beckham's agent for confirmation that he had put Posh Spice's life in danger as a result of the accident. The Beckham's lawyer, Mr Rupert Squires, contacted our offices claiming that the UK courts had issued an order banning publication of the extract or of any of the details relating to the case. Early this morning, Mr Squires threatened an injunction preventing publication of the story. At the time of publication, however, Mr Squires had failed to properly serve papers on ControversyCorner.com

Dazza at 19:19:07 Thursday March 15 2001
I picked a cracking photo up on Sunday from a guy I know at West Ham. This pic sums up everything about Stuart Pearce. I lovethis photo, and rate it as high as the famous pic of him in an England shirt just after his penalty against Spain.
This pic is around 133k so it will take a few seconds for it to download, but it is well worth it
http://www.comeonyouirons.com/commitment.htm

Niki at 18:09:42 Thursday March 15 2001
www.soccerdogs.co.uk

Paolo at 16:37:04 Thursday March 15 2001
Planet Nigel must be a nice place to live....

Paolo at 16:35:49 Thursday March 15 2001
Read this and weep...

http://www.guardian.co.uk/Archive/Article/0,4273,4141789,00.html

Nigel at 16:33:56 Thursday March 15 2001
Alright, lets quit this crap about Tihenen and give Harry some credit. He's involved with West Ham's affairs morning noon and night. We on the other hand base our views on the situation read from the media. Harry obviously had his reasons for letting the Fin go. So come on guys, stiffen that lip and lets hear three hardy cheers for Harry Redknapp...hip hip HOORAY!!!..hip hip HOOORAY!!!...hip hip HOOOORRRAAYYY!!! Thats more like it...now dont you feel better after that?

Joe at 16:02:33 Thursday March 15 2001
Tihenien played 10 games in total. And in every one performed magnificently. Look at it from another way. He won't pay Ł4m for Tihenen, yet he continues to recruit old duffers in the twilight of their careers. Ruddock, Stimac, Winterburn, Pearce. How much must he have been paying these a week? The man is beginning to try my patience.

Parsley Breathe at 15:42:38 Thursday March 15 2001
While I want Harry out I wouldn't use Tihinen as evidence against him. The player only had a couple of games and did okay. What I object to is Deadcrap's insistance on saying the price was 4m when the world and his wife knows it was only 2.5m. The man is a born liar.

Jonny at 15:05:28 Thursday March 15 2001
Who was Johnny (with an h)? I'm the only Jonny. I agree - Holligan, Defoe, Todorov - he's supposed to be a gambler, but he won't risk within the squad - what did we ever have to lose?

Ben at 13:59:12 Thursday March 15 2001
This is the kind of prick we're dealing with. Harry won't sign Tihinen cos he reckons Ł4m is too pricey. Here we have a player who is highly regarded in Finland with a reputation as being an 'iceman' (Bobby Moore springs to mind). Plenty of years ahead of him too. AT a young age injuries will not be a problem like some of the old duffers H picks up. Ł4 will seem like peanuts in two years.

Gavin Holligan has been knocking em in for the reserves including 2 against Watford. Harry's reply is that he is willing to listen to any offers for Holligan?

The blokes fecking lost the plot ain't he?
Someone should get him committed. Upton Park is steadily turning into a scene from 'One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest'.

The mans a joke. Out him now!

Paolo at 13:49:14 Thursday March 15 2001
If we'd had Tihinen in the side for the Spurs game we'd be in the semis.

Harry has cocked up totally on this one.

Tihinen awaits offers at 13:41:57 Thursday March 15 2001

Hannu Tihinen is back in Stavanger still waiting to see if anyone tries to sign him before the new Norwegian season.

What a shame. I thought he was outstanding for us.

You're a first class Quunt Harry Redknapp.

Paolo at 11:25:33 Thursday March 15 2001
DiP - we hardly hear from you for months, and then suddenly you burst into prose! Have you been at DD's stash?!

But you're right, we do need to get behind the team. The season's not over yet, there's still pride and a decent finish to play for, and a win over Ipswich Saturday would be a nice start.

But what we do or don't do doesn't really matter if the team play like they did against Arse or Chelsea, or if H is his usual incompentent self. So we'll have to wait and see what happens Saturday afternoon.

If they come out on fire and beat Ipswich soundly, and if H shows some daring and tactical awareness, then we'll be right behind them. But if it's anything like it's been recently it's gong to be a long, slow death.

H has got a long way to go to earn my respect again.

Frank C at 10:54:42 Thursday March 15 2001
Amosphere can be broken down very easily:
1) Sit next to or in the group of people who are like minded and display a passion for the team that displays itself in singing, abuse and general heart felt shouting.
2) Sit as close to opposing fans as possible, this ensures another target for abuse other than Ian Dowie (oh sorry he's left, we can still abuse him).
3) Get totally tanked up before game, this ensures you are well bullet proof, and will in no way be limited by any shyness of personality once inside the ground.
4) Buy a hot dog off a stallholder on way to ground.
5) Stand up and sod the seats
The reality is that:
1) You're sitting next to either a day tripper who has no idea why bubbles is being sung all round, or a suited twat.
2) You have to sit down, with a restricted view.
3) Real fans cannot afford to pay the current asking price
4) Harry hasn't a clue

C&B at 08:35:22 Thursday March 15 2001
You forgot Scenario 3:

The team turn out as apathetic as against Chelshite and Arse and get soundly beaten.

There is no question about the atmo. It is always crap at UP. Has been for years now so won't change overnight.

Dave iP at 01:46:38 Thursday March 15 2001
Now it's Thursday, I'm not feeling quite as bad as I did Sunday night (ie, verging on suicidal - my mate's one consolation was that she wouldn't have to divorce her gooner husband if we'd lost in the semis) I can bring myself to think about Saturday and Ipswich. While the boys really need to show their professionalism and pride, we also have our part to play. Picture these two scenarios, and imagine how the team will feel in each.

Scenario 1

They trot out, determined to put Sunday behind them. They get a lukewarm welcome from a disappointed crowd. Put a move or 2 together, both of which breakdown, and as soon as Ipswich break, they can feel the anxiety/despondency from the crowd.

Result? Soft goal and a 3-0 defeat.

Scenario 2

They trot out, determined to put Sunday behind them. They get an absolutely ear-f***ingly loud cheer, from a crowd proud of the run, beating the Mancs away, the Mackems away, and fighting like f*** in the last game. Get a good couple of attacks in and, even if they don't score, they know that the sheer volume of noise is going to keep the ball out of their own net.

The point is this. We're are all devastated by Sunday. But are we as heart-broken as Joe, who reckons it might be his fault? As Flamps, who's just gagging to break all his dad's achievements with WHU? As Psycho, who know it might be his last season? As Seb, who sounds like he's desperate to become an Upton Park legend? As Paolo, who's, well, bonkers?

This is the game when, possibly more even than at the Swamp, sorry, Gold Trafford, they need us and our support the most. Ipswich will be thinking they're in for an easy ride, against a demoralised team and a bitter crowd. F*** 'em!

Make some NOISE! Games at Upton Park are so quiet! We need to show the team that we are still behind them, that we're not just going to turn our backs on them because we were knocked out of the FA Cup at a stage far later than we usually get. Show some belief! Give them the confidence that they may well be lacking on Saturday, the confidence that one heart-breaking result does not a bad team make.

We can put a run together. We can still scrap for Europe. Who have we got left to play? No-one that we can't shit on, on our day. It's time on Saturday that we told the boys that Saturday IS our day/ And every day that they go out and play for us, for the Claret & Blue, for everything thing that this great club stands for.

Fuck it! Enough's Enough. Compared to us, Ipswich, Everton, Villa, Derby, Geordies, LeedsScum, Mancs, Soton, Boro - you're nothing! Those of you that haven't just dragged yourselves up from the Nationwide, we've done you over the last year. Give up now. This is our time. We'll stuff you because ours is the beautiful game, the stuff of heroes. The stuff of legends.

The time is now.

All Together:

COME ON YOU IRRRROOONNNNSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DiP

Dagnehma Dave at 18:27:59 Wednesday March 14 2001
sup people??? anyone for a toke....?

Paolo - in triplicate at 18:06:00 Wednesday March 14 2001
Just tried to get to KUMB and got a screen that said "Forbidden" instead!!

How can something as dull as KUMB be dangerous enough to justify that?!

Paolo at 18:03:07 Wednesday March 14 2001
Just been thinking about that last posting - the lucky bastard gets to play for West Ham AND a French girlfriend!

Mind you, he is ginger, Australian and married, so I suppose that evens things up a bit.

Paolo at 18:00:43 Wednesday March 14 2001
Anyone seen the bit on Ironworks about Foxe? Apparently we've got him at last because he's married his French girlfriend, and now doesn't need a work permit!

By all accounts he's pretty good as well.

Lisa at 17:30:15 Wednesday March 14 2001
Yer sorry I was talking to someone here with that name and accidently typed it in.

IP Police at 17:18:17 Wednesday March 14 2001
Is Lisa (who posted at 16:38)
and Johnny (who posted his name at 16:47)
the same person?

I think they could be

Lisa at 17:17:33 Wednesday March 14 2001
Talk to me anyone!!!!!!

Lisa at 17:10:33 Wednesday March 14 2001
Yer paolo down boy!,

Not getting excited are we?

Lisa at 17:09:18 Wednesday March 14 2001
Hi Dave,

It is more comfortable plus I have just had an operation and I cant really put any on.

Paolo at 17:08:14 Wednesday March 14 2001
Down, boy, down!

lisa in the office - bored at 17:08:01 Wednesday March 14 2001
Paolo first of all what is wrong with girls liking football cause I used to play, so I know a bit. Leeds are a good team but you are right it was fantastic watching them get bet last year. I think everyone in their right mind will agree

Dagenham Dave at 17:07:07 Wednesday March 14 2001
Is it purely a comfort thing.....?

Dagenham Dave at 17:06:45 Wednesday March 14 2001
So Lisa .... tell us more about your decision to walk round panty-less ...... I am very interested....

Paolo at 16:51:39 Wednesday March 14 2001
Here we go again! Girlies popping up on Alf's without underwear - suddenly Alf's will get strangely busy!

And, no, Lisa, Leeds are NOT quality, they are a bunch of cheating thugs. And seeing us beat them at Elland Road last year was one of the best moments of my life!

johnny at 16:47:40 Wednesday March 14 2001

Lisa Jarvis in Working at 16:38:48 Wednesday March 14 2001
I dont wear underwear either what is wrong with that?I Should say this as a hammer myself but leeds are quality!

Paolo at 16:29:27 Wednesday March 14 2001
KB - just the World Cup in 66, we'll settle for that.

Kosher Boy in In hospital my sides had split at 11:12:21 Wednesday March 14 2001
Paolo: I'll always be here m8. It dont matter if the Woolwich Nomads beat us in the semi; they probably will. See the thing is I'm just enjoying the fact that my small little club that has never achieved anything in its 120 year history managed to beat the great WHU on their own manor. You know the West Ham that has won countless European trophies, FA cups for fun, became the first side to do the double in the 20th century. Oh! sorry have I got my facts wrong?

Henry at 11:01:45 Wednesday March 14 2001
I must confess, having watched the Manscum game last night, as much as I hate that red shite, you can't help but admire their movement, passing, imagination and general confidence that makes them the forse that thay are.

Jonny at 18:52:40 Tuesday March 13 2001
Lisa - how come you only managed to see highlights????

jonny at 18:51:01 Tuesday March 13 2001
p.s I'm not hibernating just yet

jonny at 18:48:53 Tuesday March 13 2001
Away from the end of the world - if Leeds turf out Woodgate and Bowyer then I reckon we'd be the only club immoral enough to take them - quality players, even if they don't wear underwear Paolo

Paolo at 17:55:09 Tuesday March 13 2001
What sort of a perv doesn't wear underpants?!

Paolo at 17:52:17 Tuesday March 13 2001
Lisa - is that out of choice?!!

Lisa Jarvis in work at 17:26:41 Tuesday March 13 2001
West Ham should have won. I only saw the highlights it looked like a good, exciting game. I have been trying to avoid spur fans but unfortunately I live with one.

Jonny at 14:12:16 Tuesday March 13 2001
I've been avoiding Spurs twats that I bet with on our banker home win.
I think if we'd won I could have forgiven H for throwing two games that I spent fortunes on getting to - but I'm soo f'ing pissed off!!
The players he rested were not match sharp - that is what happens when you don't play footballers in football matches!!!!
Can't pay Ł4 mil for Tihinen but Song , Minto, Charles.....need I say more.
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH I'm soo fucked off.
I agree Shaka's a great shot stopper but doesn't command box or defenders well enough.
I want to hibernate till the start of next season.

Fat Fred at 13:28:06 Tuesday March 13 2001
From F365......
BOWYER SAYS PANTS TO PANTS

Leeds Midfielder Admits He's Not Wearing Underwear In Court

THE trial of Leeds United footballer Lee Bowyer was briefly adjourned on Tuesday for the star to change his trousers after he admitted he was not wearing any underpants in court.

Bowyer, 24, was asked by the defence to get changed into the trousers and shoes he claims he wore on the night of the alleged attack on Asian student Sarfraz Najeib outside the Majestyk nightclub in Leeds.

The prosecution claims the shoes the footballer was shown wearing on a video had a large ornamental buckle on and were not the ones handed to police as evidence after the incident in January last year.

But defence barrister Desmond de Silva, QC, said he wanted him to change into the garments to prove that the buckle was in fact a patch of the star's skin, visible to the camera, because Bowyer never wore socks.

Before asking him to change into the trousers, Mr de Silva asked Bowyer: ''Are you wearing underpants?'' Bowyer smiled, appeared embarrassed and glanced to the back of the public gallery before replying: ''No, I'm not, no.''

Mr de Silva then asked him to leave court to change into the trousers and shoes.

Earlier he asked him: ''Did you, at any stage that evening, enter Mill Hill where the prosecution say the principal incident occurred?''

Bowyer replied: ''I never entered Mill Hill at all, like I told the police. I never entered Mill Hill at any stage.''

Mr de Silva: ''Were you, at any stage, involved in any confrontation with Asians?'' Bowyer answered ''No Asians or any sort of race. I was not involved in any trouble that evening.''

England international Jonathan Woodgate, 21, of Middlesbrough, midfielder Bowyer, of Leeds, and Neale Caveney and Paul Clifford, both 21, of Middlesbrough, deny causing grievous bodily harm with intent to Mr Najeib. They also deny affray. Mr Najeib, 20, of Rotherham, South Yorkshire, suffered serious injuries including a broken leg and fractured cheekbone.

Woodgate, Caveney and Clifford, with Leeds United defender Michael Duberry, 24, of Leeds, also plead not guilty to conspiring to pervert the course of justice after the attack.

Bowyer re-entered court wearing the black trousers and black shoes he said he had been wearing on the night of the incident. He was asked by Mr de Silva to walk in front of the jury box at Hull Crown Court and up and down a step to demonstrate how he would have been seen on video entering the Majestyk nightclub on the video film.

The trial judge Mr Justice Poole left his chair to walk over and watch Bowyer's demonstration, which he then had to repeat on the other side of the courtroom for prosecuting counsel Nicholas Campbell QC.

There was then another short adjournment while Bowyer left court to change back into the clothes he had been wearing earlier.

Mr de Silva took Bowyer through police interviews in which he had told officers that he had run down Boar Lane in pursuit of Woodgate and his friends but had fallen over and received a blow on the side of the face from an unknown attacker as he tried to get up.

He had told police: ''It's just that I haven't done anything apart from take a whack so I can't understand why I am here.''

Mr de Silva asked: ''Was that your position then?'' Bowyer replied: ''Yes. It still is.''

He agreed that he had refused to take part in an identification parade two weeks after the incident and his solicitor had told police it would not be fair in view of the intense media coverage that had followed the arrest of him and Woodgate.

Mr de Silva asked: ''Given the extent of the coverage did you think it could possibly be fair?'' Bowyer said: ''No.''

Police had gone ahead and compiled a video showing Bowyer at a function where he was receiving the Leeds United Player of the Year award and used it alongside footage of other young men in dinner jackets in similar circumstances.
The court has heard that witnesses picked Bowyer out from the video compilation.

He told the court: ''It's obvious they are mistaken. The only thing I can think of is they picked me out because they had seen me in the papers.

It is easy to see why they would pick me out when they had seen my picture plastered all over the place as a suspect.''

He said a description from a witness that he had been seen biting the victim during the attack was ''rubbish''.
The prosecution have alleged it was Clifford who carried out the biting.

Bowyer said he did not know how blood from the victim's brother Shahzad Najeib came to be in two places on his black Prada leather jacket.

Bowyer said: ''I can't believe I had his blood on my jacket. I really don't know because I wasn't in Mill Hill so I didn't get it from there. No matter how many times anyone asks me, I don't know. I have no idea.''

Dirty Dick at 12:46:42 Tuesday March 13 2001
Haydon Fox will be playing for the reserves on Wednesday.

C&B (just back to cyberland) at 08:39:11 Tuesday March 13 2001
Someone please tell me that Deadcrap has resigned.

Paolo at 22:22:30 Monday March 12 2001
Kosher Boy - if you've got any balls at all you'll come back on this site after the semis and take what's coming.

But I'm pretty sure we won't see hide nor hair of you - you'll be too busy watching your season disappear down the toilet. No one remembers losers.

Paolo at 22:17:29 Monday March 12 2001
And I've had to put up with bloody Spurs fans crowing all fucking day - it doesn't get much worse than that.

Come the semis, I'm an Arse fan for the day. They'd better stuff those second rate wankers good and proper.

And then PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE Harry, get it sorted out in the league and let us end up above the tossers in the table.

Paolo - on the evening shift at 22:14:32 Monday March 12 2001
If Pierce was fit enough to be on the bench, why wasn't he playing? Super Finn is the best defender we've had at the club since Rio, so why wasn't he playing? Todorov is just the sort of striker we've needed for ages, so why did he only come on when it was too late? When it became obvious that Spurs' tactics were to stifle our midfield, why didn't Harry change tactics? How did harry expect us to win a cup game against a side who believe it's their destiny, after the last two crap games he's put us through?

We can't score goals and we can't defend. We need a proper striker (I'm sorry, I know Freddie looks good, but he just doesn't score enough goals) - Harry has one on the bench, but doesn't play him until it's too late. Our defence is crap, but Harry won't fork out a measley #4m for one of the best defenders I've seen, and insists on playing fucking Stimac. Out tactics were wrong, but we haven't got a manager who has the ability to read a game, or know what the fuck to do about it. We need coaching, but we've got a manager who doesn't think players need coaching. We need a team, but we've got a manager who only sees individuals.

Harry out NOW!!

Oh, and I'm truly sorry to have to write this, but we need a new goalie as well. I was a great fan of Hislop, but he just isn't up to it any more.

Kosher boy in At the back of the shelf at 22:05:24 Monday March 12 2001
Oh dear oh dear the mighty WHU couldnt even beat lowly Tottenham at home in the cup. Just who do those boys from North London think they are? They even let WHU back in the game when any decent side would have killed em off! Just a passing thought- Is Harry Redknapp turning into Alex Ferguson or what? Moaning about everything except the truth. And slagging the best young talent in England off publicy is surely a way to piss him off so that he leaves. Oh well never mind boys obviously your name wasnt on the cup after all. Snigger snigger.

Dagenham Dave at 21:01:24 Monday March 12 2001
Gutted. But oh-so very predictable West Ham. Can't type no more. Goodbye.... maybe for good.....

Lower West Winkle at 17:24:37 Monday March 12 2001
I fuckin' hate football!

We were all up for it in the LW, shame the players weren't.

Sandra at 16:15:55 Monday March 12 2001
I cried myself to sleep.

Ronan at 16:08:44 Monday March 12 2001
so so painful!!!!!!!111

Ian in Dublin at 15:48:43 Monday March 12 2001
First time posting on this site. Last game I was at was the absolutely thrilling 1-1 draw at home with Cov. Don't know about Harry out, but surely, surely, surely, we need a new striker. Freddy has been good but he cannot play upfront on his own. Di Canio drops too deep to help him effectively. Maybe this Todorov is the solution, but this has been going on for ages. Can't see relegation but with the talent at H's disposal, to be looking over our shoulders is a disgrace.

Steve in doors at 15:23:32 Monday March 12 2001
Feck, arse, bollocks.

Gareth in Romford at 12:46:49 Monday March 12 2001
Shit result. Totally pissed off. But what a breath of fresh air Svetoslav Todorov was. Should be a regular.

Kim at 12:38:50 Monday March 12 2001
You know what? That Todo Bulgarian striker is what we have been looking for all this time. But in Harrys usual manner he leaves it until its too late. If todo is on the bench again for our next match then it only goes to confirm my suspisions. That Harry has his favourites and is biased when selecting his teams. Spurs edged it, we threw it away with slack marking. Fecking boolox! Harry's a gambler, its in his nature to take chances. Gamblers lose more than they win and the same goes with Harry.

Paolo - depressed at 12:04:13 Monday March 12 2001
Can't see a thing today, so obviously someone has been using bad language.

But I can't say that I blame you.

Life is shit at times.

Del at 11:49:56 Monday March 12 2001
Why has Redknapp had a pop at Joey Cole for coming off of the post when NO-ONE was marking Dougherty. Also, why is Joe expected to pick up their Ł11m striker at a throw - in?
Why does he persist in playing Stimac (little pace, average in the air!) and leave Ian Pearce (oh he made one mistake at Leicester I can't trust him anymore even if he is quick and at 6 foot 3 up for the battle with Ferdinand) on the effing bench.
I can't see us winning another game this season, so Bradf9rd, Man City, Middlesborough and Coventry better be bad for all our sakes!
I can't remember feeling any more p#ssed off than I was in the traffic last night.

Ian in Northampton at 11:12:15 Monday March 12 2001
Well done, Mr. Optimist...

"I reckon the yids will do us Sunday. Reckon a 0-2 result is on the cards. We will play well throughout the ninety minutes but just not score. I can see REbrov fucking
our day right up. Forget about Harry resigning. He's there til his contract is up. So you might as well accept it. What we need is a goal pincher, someone who's
always around for the scraps in the center of the box. A robbie fowler type player."

Does anyone else believe in tempting fate?

Frank C at 09:28:17 Monday March 12 2001
Wank fucking wank....we had the warnings i suppose with the crap games in the league and the excuses of holding off for the cup. Let's be honest, the current Yid team is absolute crap. yet they were ' up for it' more than we were yesterday. Couple that with what has been a pretty much suspect defence all season, and an over reliance on PDC to produce the goods...and bang....H should go definately...Too long has he survived on the cheeky cockney chappie routine.....On paper we should be stuffing the yids and well up in the league....so if we can do it on paper, and don't get the results on the pitch, ulimatly, the buck has to stop somewhere. This isn't a knee jerk reaction either, this must be pretty much the final straw. managers get judged on results and performances. We've been underperfoming all season, this is just the icing on the cake

Kristian in Oslo at 08:46:26 Monday March 12 2001
That was not fun. Not at all. I find myself agreeing with Bill: I actually hope the Arse sends em out. On the match: (IMHO) West Ham had problems for quite a while in the match, but overall I think we played ok, which reflected it the stats. More important I think we got severly punished for personal errors. Twice by Joe Cole, on the shiites first and third goals. Poor lad. Stuart Pearce is a god, no doubt at all. End note: my sympathies to you all. Back to work.

Neville at 22:04:24 Sunday March 11 2001
What a fucking downer. What are we to do now? We've had a shit season in the Premiership and after all that hard graft we lose out to another bunch of under-acheivers. I'm still proud of our boys and still feel we're moving in the right direction. But its not far enough. And I'm beginning to wonder if Harry is capable of taking us that extra mile. A couple of things tonight.
1. Our defence I thought looked much more solid when Tihenen was there. But Harry didn't want to pay out Ł4m and I think is now paying for this mistake.
2. Todorov comes with a good reputation as a consistent goal-scorer. Yet Harry leave it to the final dying moments before bringing him on. He's been on the bench past half-dozen games. Why?
3. I'm not happy with Shaka's command of the goal area. I don't think he communicates effectively enough with his defence. Time and time again there are cock ups between him and the rest.
4. Harry MUST spend the money he got for Rio NOW! No more fucking around hoping to get a cut price deal. If he doesn't spend soon we will lose the confidence of the younger players and they will leave. I think Carrick is first class but I think he will be the next to leave if we aint carefull.

Its been a shit night. I feel absolutely gutted. But this aint the first time and we'll get over this one and be back next season. Its tough, but what little consolation it is, I'd rather us go out now than in the semi's or lose in the final.

Cheers.

TerryTTT at 21:48:50 Sunday March 11 2001
So, all you Harry'fuckwit' Redknapp apologists; what now? The man, his 'tactics' and his man-management skills are the sickest joke we have ever had to endure. Todays result had that awful inevitability about it - so much for throwing the last 2 games in preparation for this one!! Sack the bastard and his fucking cronies NOW or, as I said last time, we will just have to shoot the perrenial fucking LOSER!!!

andy in exmouth at 21:24:35 Sunday March 11 2001
cuntfuck

andy in exmouth at 21:23:30 Sunday March 11 2001
will somebody invent a swear word to describe how i feel

andy in hu cares at 21:21:44 Sunday March 11 2001
?????????????????????????????????????????????????

andy at 21:20:11 Sunday March 11 2001

andy in exmouth at 21:19:07 Sunday March 11 2001
i cannot explain how i feel

barking dog in merthyr at 21:18:37 Sunday March 11 2001
west ham not too good spurs closed us down well and had a good finisher in rebrov.we just didnt click as a team not helped by harry resting everyone for three matches.harry to go then who replaces him stuart pearce , alan curbishley. i dunno im depressed!!!!

andy in exmouth at 21:17:01 Sunday March 11 2001
what@y do????????? where do you go????????????

andy at 21:09:06 Sunday March 11 2001
why why why why????????????????????????????????????????????

andy at 21:07:43 Sunday March 11 2001

andy at 21:06:40 Sunday March 11 2001
who is cole

andy at 21:05:23 Sunday March 11 2001

andy in exmouth at 21:03:25 Sunday March 11 2001
will somebody please tell me why i support this shite, & have done since the year dot

UNHAPPY BILL in AUSTRALIA at 19:58:47 Sunday March 11 2001
didn`t think it would come to this,but i hope arse
kicks the living SHIT out of the yids in the semis

Dazza at 19:35:26 Sunday March 11 2001
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

Niki at 13:01:49 Sunday March 11 2001
Right I'm off. LET'S 'AV IT!!!!!! COMEONYOUIRRRRROONNNNNNSSSSAHH.

Frank C in ex pat Limerick Hammers, across the small pond. On the early morning shift.. at 10:01:38 Sunday March 11 2001
In the famous words of the infamous twat called Glitter....COME ON >>COME ON..........COME ON ....COME ON ...COME ON.............errrrr do you want to be in my gang??

Lower West Winkle at 19:58:22 Saturday March 10 2001
What a dream, Wycombe in the Semi-Final, Liverpool / Franceanal in the final. Win or lose, we're in Europe next year, and as my new job envolves a bit of European Travel, I'll be following me lovely Hammers on the Corporation - 'andsome!

We're gonna do it tomorrow, I can feel it. Although that might be down to the 'kin 'andsome pink champagne, and several bottles of wine consumed this evening. Yes DD, you'ain't the only indulger - know wot I mean?

See all the usual faces at the POW - so named for the "fresh" rolls and luxurious accomodation.

TTFN

East Midlands Hammer at 16:14:40 Saturday March 10 2001
Good luck West Ham lets hope we stuff the yids

n.o.b(North of Border) in scotland at 08:39:44 Saturday March 10 2001
As I have only been introduced to this web site a short time ago this is my first contribution, but I feel someone should represent the views of the fans n.o.b. I have been extremely dissapointed with the performance over the last few games. It appears that if all of our golden three aren't playing and both our goal scorers are injured we have NOBODY to replace them. Is this what 'arry has done with the money bought NOBODIES a bunch of misfits that can't play and have no desire to play for West Ham? Are they only there for the money? I feel sorry for the people that are parting with their hard earned cash to see these teams that have been put out.
If they can't or won't play get rid of them 'arry and buy GOOD quality players.

Paolo - on the night shift at 01:36:51 Saturday March 10 2001
Bollocks.

Dazza at 16:42:19 Friday March 09 2001
there was more movement inside the top half of one those Hammerettes jumpsuits than the whole of our midfield in 90 minutes of football on wednesday nite.. i vote we keep 'em!!

U.H.H at 16:16:36 Friday March 09 2001
Disappearing for the weekend,hopefully we will have plenty to shout about come 5 on sunday.
UP THE HAMMERS!

U.H.H at 16:05:19 Friday March 09 2001
NAY.

Anon at 14:59:18 Friday March 09 2001
Nay

Bonkers at 13:46:32 Friday March 09 2001
Can all those in favour of seeing an end to that riduculous charade at half-time known as the Hammerettes, please say Aye!

Mr Optimist at 13:44:45 Friday March 09 2001
I reckon the yids will do us Sunday. Reckon a 0-2 result is on the cards. We will play well throughout the ninety minutes but just not score. I can see REbrov fucking our day right up. Forget about Harry resigning. He's there til his contract is up. So you might as well accept it. What we need is a goal pincher, someone who's always around for the scraps in the center of the box. A robbie fowler type player.

Frank C at 13:25:16 Friday March 09 2001
We might well be playing the worst Yid team in a long while, however, on our day we have proven to be more than capable of making a complete bollocks of proceedings, should the mode suit. Let's hope we stuff the Yids, this would just and i mean just compensate for the under achievement in the bloody league.

Dazza at 11:11:21 Friday March 09 2001
That's why we called it Alfs Moans Page instead of Warrens moans page

BIG N at 10:50:10 Friday March 09 2001
Love the picture of Alf Garnett, shame Warren Mitchells a yid in it!

Ted in Herts at 10:42:05 Friday March 09 2001
Why are a few of you ammers worried about Sunday? You are playing probably the worst excuse for a Spurs side in a very long time.

U.H.H at 10:27:28 Friday March 09 2001
I was'nt anyway.

Dazza at 09:53:10 Friday March 09 2001
it's a hoax.. there is no answer.. so I would stop worrying about it

riitta in Finland at 09:51:38 Friday March 09 2001
The riddle a few posts down is something I've heard earlier
and I'm sure there's an answer too but can't remember it.
Could it have been something to do with the lights?.. but
don't know what Scots and divisions would have different in
lighting than the Premier...????

U.H.H at 08:24:17 Friday March 09 2001
It must be nice to see your team doing well in europe on telly[well, not that well but just in europe]like L,POOL,LEEDS,MANURE,ARSE.
I wonder how that feels? Ah if only..............

U.H.H at 08:15:32 Friday March 09 2001
Dave;i really hope not but....... probably yeah.

Dag Dave at 00:29:38 Friday March 09 2001
innit???? I'm right aint i??

Dag Dave after too many JD's at 00:26:20 Friday March 09 2001
....and the fucking annoying thing is ..... If I put money on those spurs c*nts is .... it'll be a draw and we'll lose 3-0 in the replay.... no semi final and no fucking money

Dagenham Dave at 00:24:15 Friday March 09 2001
We are gonna fucking lose on Sunday I fucking know it. And we all fucking know it

Fat Fred at 17:49:40 Thursday March 08 2001
Can someone do me favour and give me the address of the Times Newspaper website please ?

Ronan at 16:38:28 Thursday March 08 2001
Sod this.....last night was soo predictable!!!
we were never going to win that game,.and if we lose Sunday,what then?,a relegation dog fight????
As Shank's said the league should be "our bread and butter",the cup run is fantastic,but it should be a spring board for our league form.
We should definately not be reserving everyting for the cup,in my opinion Harry is going about this all wrong!!!

U.H.H at 16:30:41 Thursday March 08 2001
According to recent rumours there have to be a bung in it for him as well.
and anyway it would probably be plastic heather that did'nt like travelling to away games.

Del at 16:08:24 Thursday March 08 2001
I hope you realise that Harry will only buy an out of favour piece of lucky heather, rather than a top class piece or an up & coming unproven piece because he doesn't want to pay over the top.

Brian at 15:49:08 Thursday March 08 2001
So Harry puts yesterdays defeat down to.

1. Pearce not rested.
2. Injuries to key players.
3. Nuisance of the game being rescheduled.
4. Bad Luck

When will he ever put his hand up and take some of the responsibility as manager. He has Ł15m burning a hole in his pocket. He's fecking around with Tihnen. This makes me wonder if he has completely lost it. He'll pay out for Liverpool rejects who didn't have to prove themselves worthy of there price. Yet this young lad has been remarkables and still he won't part with Ł4m. Just the interest accumulated alone on the sale of Rio must pay some way to the Ł4m asking price. He's bought a Bulgarian striker he claims is the muts nuts but never plays him. Harry, own to yer mistakes and stop blaming it on bad luck. You'll selling lucky heather next and consulting your crystal ball.

Del at 15:47:30 Thursday March 08 2001
That should read 'who know there is no answer'

Del at 15:46:32 Thursday March 08 2001
There is no answer, I believe it is one of those riddles that people make up know there is no answer

Redknapp Out!
Erm Anyone In as I cannot think of a replacement at the moment

Effing Riddle at 15:30:53 Thursday March 08 2001
Can you solve this 'effing' riddle?

What enters the field of play in a football match at half time, but doesn't leave until the match is over.
If its a Saturday it leaves after the game, but if its a midweek game it remains until the next day.
It only happens in the english Premier League, but not in Scotland or the lower divisions.

Dirty Dick in who cares at 13:34:35 Thursday March 08 2001
I think you're all getting carried away with this "we hate Harry thing!" remember we support WHU and can't be expected to beat teams like Chels-scum and Arse in the leage.
Wait for Sunday and watch a totally different side of the Hammers we've grown to love, warts and all, including Harry.

3-1 to the 'ammers to stuff Totts(I thought 01 was in the year, I must be wrong then!!!)

If I'm wrong, I'll join the arry slag club.

U.H.H at 13:12:36 Thursday March 08 2001
Go to official site and read HR's plans for the summer.......im depressed already just thinking about it.

Marty in London at 13:03:37 Thursday March 08 2001
Absolutly Disgusted! In my own sick little fantasy West Ham will be in a relegation dogfight, Spurs kill us 5-0 and perhaps then people will see the light! Fuck off Harry!

U.H.H at 12:32:15 Thursday March 08 2001
Paolo;That's like music to my ears,for one who is usually so diplomatic it's nice to hear you coating off HR.
And as you said the likes of IPSWICH! for fucks sake.It truly has been a bad week to be a hammer.

CB at 12:14:32 Thursday March 08 2001
Paolo: HURRAY!

Paolo at 12:11:13 Thursday March 08 2001
Blimey - I just 'Web Access Denied' myself!

Paolo at 12:10:30 Thursday March 08 2001
What was all that about last night?

So we've got a big game on Sunday, so we've got a few injuries, but NOTHING excuses that steaming pile of shit we had to sit through last night.

Chelsea weren't even very good! Harry just treated that game as something we had to get through, 3 points already lost. Well that just isn't good enough, we should be fighting for every game and for every point!!

What the fuck happens if we lose Sunday?????

Does anyone on here seriously think we can get as far as Cardiff and WIN?????

My patience is at an end with Harry. So he buys a few good players, but he also buys a load of crap. So he's done well with West Ham - but has he done as well as Sunderland, Leicester, Ipswich (Ipswich, for fuck's sake!), Newcastle - even bloody Southampton???

OK, so we've got some top kids coming through - but how much has Harry got to do with that? And what does he do with them when he gets them?

Let's chuck those Claret and Blue glasses away and recognise Harry for what he is - a fucking failure.

Harry out - NOW!

Dazza at 12:04:32 Thursday March 08 2001
A hoax ??

Riddle at 11:59:42 Thursday March 08 2001
Can you solve this riddle?

What enters the field of play in a football match at half time, but doesn't leave until the match is over.
If its a Saturday it leaves after the game, but if its a midweek game it remains until the next day.
It only happens in the english Premier League, but not in Scotland or the lower divisions.

CB at 11:20:57 Thursday March 08 2001
The downside of winning the FA Cup is that it will mean Harry keeping his job.

In that respect it would be grand if Spurs absolutely paste us on Sunday.

Get that incompetent fucker out of the hot seat.

Shane at 09:21:46 Thursday March 08 2001
I feckin' give in I do. Whats the use. We can't even get a point at home against a much over-rated side like Chelsea. They were nothing special in fact very average for a side of supposed superstars. But there we go again, giving them all the time and space they want to do with ball. We didn't close them down quick enough, when we created chances there was no one in the box to meet the ball. Our talented players like Joe Cole and Di Canio were not provided with any support when they had the ball. At one point young Cole had a pop at Suker for just standing there and watching him try to trick his way out of 3 defenders. Our defence was all over the place. In fact if ever there was prove that we missed Tihenen it was last night. Song, Suker, Soma might just as well not turned up. If Cole had scored from that shot in the six yard box that hit the post, maybe we would have been singing a different tune. But Chelseas two goals were so obvious, you didn't have to be a bloody mind reader to see what was going to happen. There was nothing exceptional about the goals. We were guilty of letting them play. If Harry had done his home work he would have told his players to close those pricks down early and don't let em play. Instead we did the opposite. I'm hoping we get a result against Totts this weekened to lay this nightmare to rest. I've always liked Harry, but you have to sometimes question his tactics. Harry must understand that you cant play Park football in the Premiership and expect to do well. SHIT! SHIT FECKING SHIT!!! BOLLOX!! SHIT!!

U.H.H at 08:23:26 Thursday March 08 2001
Terry; A welcome return to one of the biggest Harry Deadcrapp haters around,i must admit i am also becoming more severe in my critisism of 'uncle H'. After half time last night all i did was curse the day he put on his sheepskin and stepped into B.B's still warm shoe's.
Short of a miracle on sunday[hopefully in the form of a little italian]our season is pretty much over......short of trying to extend the frail 9 points above the relegation battle that is taking shape.
CHEERS HARRY.

Ian in Dallas at 00:09:11 Thursday March 08 2001
TTTT: did something upset you?

TerryTTT at 22:41:14 Wednesday March 07 2001
I have not posted for ages because of the whole futility of WHU at the moment. Nothing we say is going to change the desperate situation we find ourselves in, nor is it going to overcome the utter frustration and desolation surrounding just about everything to do with the club at the moment. Stop fucking dreaming; only another miracle will see us through to a victory at Cardiff - so we had all start bloody praying like never before! Our performances are at absolute rock bottom but are excused by a disgraceful cretin, fuckwit, moron, liar, crook etc etc, with an almost inexhaustable stream of pathetic and untruthful excuses and whines. He is below pathetic. God, what have we got to do to get rid of the cunt - shoot him ?!!!!!

Ian in Dallas at 22:27:32 Wednesday March 07 2001
Shit shit shit

Ian in Dallas at 19:57:49 Wednesday March 07 2001
DD: yeah, from time to time. A highlight of my youth was playing for the university football team at the Ajax stadium against the Ajax youth team. We only lost 1-0 - but it should have been 10-0. The soundtrack to the week was, as I recall, 'American Pie' and the single off the Neil Young 'Harvest' album, the name of which escapes me. Was it 'Heart Of Gold'?

Dagenham Dave at 19:23:51 Wednesday March 07 2001
Lovely little coffe house in some quiant back street... drugs 'n whores ....oh what a life!

Dagenham Dave at 19:23:00 Wednesday March 07 2001
Visit Amsterdam much...?

Ian in Dallas at 17:53:17 Wednesday March 07 2001
UHH: Yeah, it's not so bad I guess. One of the perks of doing a European marketing job for a Texas-based company. By the way, does anyone know if Sunday's game is on Sky or terrestrial?

U.H.H at 17:45:48 Wednesday March 07 2001
Ian; you sound like a right jammy bastard[trip's workwise] all i have managed this year so far is a couple of days in Holland.Hoping for a trip to Canada at some point though!

Ian in Dallas at 15:53:35 Wednesday March 07 2001
I share Paolo's concerns about tonight and Dazza's about Sunday. We've all been here before - previous seasons have had their equivalents of the win at Old Trafford and Sunderland - only for our hopes to be dashed with another bout of, at best, mediocity and at worst, a flirtation with relegation. It comes with the territory.

On the good side, it's sixty-something degrees (in old money) here, the sky is blue as far as you can see (which is a long way in Texas) - and I get on the big silver bird tomorrow (having put on around ten pounds in ten days, there being little else to do in the evening but drink beer and eat).

Paolo at 15:10:37 Wednesday March 07 2001
Nik - tonight is not the night I would have chosen for that!

Del at 14:57:18 Wednesday March 07 2001
Bob, spot on with the aftermatch Harry crap. I think we're in for a 2 or 3 nil drubbing.

Dazza at 14:05:08 Wednesday March 07 2001
I hope you are referring to West Ham Nik!!!!

Niki at 14:04:16 Wednesday March 07 2001
Anyone know of any spare tickets for tonight's game. I've got a tame Mackem who wants to see London's finest in action.......

U.H.H at 13:30:38 Wednesday March 07 2001
Just heard Harry Deadcrapp on the radio already kissing Chelsea's collective arse. sorry H but i thought you usually wait till after we have been beaten to do that.

Lenny in Wanstead at 12:06:50 Wednesday March 07 2001
Don't it make yer sick. Yet again the FA show favouritism towards ManUre. They will not take action against Fabien Bartez for the kicking incedent on Leeds player Harte. I wonder if they would have come to the same decision had it been Di Canio who had lashed out with his feet like that. Niki, where are you drinking before the game tonight?

Paolo at 12:04:29 Wednesday March 07 2001
Nik - getting a lift up tonight after all, so probably won't be in the SC until the last minute or not at all.

Amy - you're more than welcome to join us here on Alf's, the more the merrier (there's some odd characters on here though, and some are not what they seem!) - but what does "and all i know is if west ham when i can get drunk" mean?!

I am NOT looking forward to tonight....

Dazza at 10:54:02 Wednesday March 07 2001
nik, if i get down in time I'll try to bump into yer in the SC...... I am really in 2 minds about tonights game.. on one hand chelscum aint won away for donkeys (a bad omen!) and they too have a few players out, so i think we could turn 'em over. on the other hand we are shit, have no players fit and everyone is more worried about sunday. Which brings me onto another point.... whe nthe draw was made a lept up and down like a madman at the prospect of turning the totts over.. since then my optimism has diminshed daily, and I am living each day in fear now, as I know WHU have an unexplainable ability of stitching me up and they will not get a result on Sunday.. God I am scared, dont let me down West Ham!

Big Mouth in the Bobby Moore Lower at 10:47:31 Wednesday March 07 2001
COME ON YOU IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bob at 10:34:06 Wednesday March 07 2001
Well, I'm gonna drag myself along to the game tonight...like I did the saturday it was postponed, only to be told at the gate that it was off. I think we'll get a point tonight. We'll firstly concede an early goal. Then scramble an equaliser in around the 70th minute mark. Harry will remark after the game that we missed seven first team players tonight, what a great side Chelsea are and how lucky they are to afford world class players while we struggle to make ends meet. Then he'll mention somthing about Pearcey and Winterburn should still be playing for England. Yes, I can read that qcunt like a book. See yer there boys and girls. Oh and ..Niki, where are you drinkning before the game tonight?

LW Winkle at 10:15:15 Wednesday March 07 2001
Mornin' all.

What's this about ring tones???

I thought they were all brown, unless you got "Farmer Giles", obviously........

U.H.H at 09:35:06 Wednesday March 07 2001
Thanks Nicki,a typically female comment.

Niki at 08:55:57 Wednesday March 07 2001
See anyone that's going tonite in the SC... 6.30ish

Niki at 08:54:53 Wednesday March 07 2001
Amy, erm.... yeah there are some other birds about. Apparently you are real, 'cos Alf told me you sent him an e-mail about Nokia ring-tones. He said he'll see what he can do. As for this lot knowing what they're talking about.... I wouldn't be so sure :o))

amy at 02:14:31 Wednesday March 07 2001
yes paolo i am on the right site......i just thought id see if there was any birds like my good self that come ere........nothing against u lads but u all know what ure talkin about when it comes to football and all i know is if west ham when i can get drunk.....anyway im off.....bye bye

Dagenham Dave at 19:07:41 Tuesday March 06 2001
Anyone got a West Ham shirt from 1978 then....? I've tried that ad in WSC but no luck. Someone must have one somewhere!

Dagenham Dave at 19:02:53 Tuesday March 06 2001
Can't see it being very pretty Wed night..... 1-1 my bet.

Dagenham Dave at 19:02:08 Tuesday March 06 2001
Eating people's vomit...!??!??? Oh Mannnn!..... I'm skinning up!

LW Winkle at 17:51:25 Tuesday March 06 2001
He is a nice bloke, I'm sure.

I bet he's a great laugh at the pub - plenty of dough from those Bournemouth shares, always got a funny story to tell, always got a tip for the gee-gees, can tell a few jokes, and all the rest of it. Great company altogether.

In fact, the only thing I don't like about Harry is that he is our manager. He makes a wonderful figurehead for the club, we just need somebody, anybody who knows a thing or two about how to use "the best team we've had since sliced bread", as we are forever reminded. I think that has a lot to do with it aswell. We're constantly told that we have a fantastic team, which raises expectation. If they said, "the same sort of shit we had in the early 90's" we'd all be a lot happier in the lower half of the league. Wouldn't we?????

U.H.H at 17:35:41 Tuesday March 06 2001
Paolo;it's not your vomit he was talking about eating.[something with a higher protein content].
Lower west winkle;Agree with Harry comments but why does every one have to say they "i think he is a good bloke but..........He never was the man for the job and never will be,fuck him off sharpish and lets start a new season with someone whose got ambitions of going somewhere and winning something.
P.S i really dont think we can get anything from the Chelscum game but saying that we will probably win 3-0[please].

2 morrows team at 17:23:57 Tuesday March 06 2001
Potts in midfield, PDC and Joey back, Ian Pearce starts BUT Winterburn out with a strained thigh, Carrick and Kanoute still unfit.

Paolo at 17:23:19 Tuesday March 06 2001
I was going to write something deep and meaningful, but the thought of someone eating my vomit has thrown me completely!

2morrows team at 17:22:56 Tuesday March 06 2001
Potts in midfield, PDC and Joey back, Ian Pearce starts BUT Winterburn out with a strained thigh, Carrick and Kanoute still unfit.

So, another capitulation is on the cards ladies and gents...

Dazza at 16:03:26 Tuesday March 06 2001
Hello!

Lower West Winkle at 15:39:31 Tuesday March 06 2001
Tickets -

I have a ticket for Sunday and if anyone wants to get silly with prices, I may consider selling.

Lower West Winkle at 15:30:40 Tuesday March 06 2001
Dave - I'd swallow Paolo's (DC) gentlemans relish - does that count???

Frank C at 15:29:02 Tuesday March 06 2001
Niki: I haven't made it over this season yet, however, I'm hoping that a trip to Cardiff in May is on the cards, so I'll see you and carl there for a bevvy.....

Lower West Winkle at 15:27:44 Tuesday March 06 2001
Nik - Is it that obvious?? Bollocks!

Actually, I've been wondering why we haven't said much about Chelscum tomorrow. Have we all stopped hating them and their supporters or summink??

Regardless, I reckon we'll beat them, then go on to FAC glory against our "auld enemy".

My new neighbour is a Tottenham fan (well of course, already...) and I plan to shit on his lawn when we win.

On the Harry subject, he has got to go. As far as I can see, he's all that's holding us back. We have players out on loan, who can only be called back under exceptional circumstances. Well, I say that having a shit second string to our squad is a very exceptional circumstance. Get Defoe back NOW!!!! We have been sadly lacking in balls slamming into the back of the net since Christmas, and yet we have a lad who seems to be able to score without trying langiushing in a lower league club. I mean, we're always told that Harry is the king of "duckin' and divin'", and yet he doesn't seem to duck and dive at all.

Don't get me wrong, I love the bloke, he always has something smart and funny to say to the cameras, and he was the ugliest winger we ever had, but it seems that he is sadly lacking in the abilities department. Let someone who can be a bit tough run the overall set-up, with Harry doing what Harry does best - buy cheap players with potential and make whitty comments on TV.

Wotcha reckon??

Message to all Lower Westies - SING THE FUCK UP - Me and Carl D keep getting sore throats making up the numbers!!

Dave iP at 15:22:11 Tuesday March 06 2001
Nik, the reason I said thta is because, even when it refers to the arse getting beat, I just cannot bring myself to celebrate any win for the manc scum. I'd rather eat Paolo's vomit (that's Eeyore, not PDC). (I wouldn't like to eat PDC's vomit either, but you know what I mean.)

Paolo at 15:08:52 Tuesday March 06 2001
PS - Harry is REALLY beginning to wind me up!!!!

Paolo at 15:08:25 Tuesday March 06 2001
Nik - I'll probably be in the Supporters' Club from about 6ish.

Why has no one mentioned the Chelsea game? This would normally one of our biggest home games of season! Are we all so sure H is going to field another crap side because of Sunday, and that we are going to roll over and lose to Chelsea at home? Lose to a side that can't win away?!

Come on you lot, this is unthinkable!!!!!

Paolo at 15:05:06 Tuesday March 06 2001
Talking of tickets (but not footy - for a change!) - anyone fancy two tickets to see The Lion King on Saturday April 7 (2pm performance)? Ł32.50 each.

I'm told it's a great show, and Ł32.50 gets you good seats in the Grand Circle. Cheaper than West Ham, and a guaranteed result!

Nik at 14:22:59 Tuesday March 06 2001
Dagenham Dave, are you feeling alright mate?

Niki at 14:22:25 Tuesday March 06 2001
Allo old Alf's bods. Stu, that's gotta be you! Welcome back. Hi Frank C and Caroline too!!!!

Niki at 14:21:04 Tuesday March 06 2001
Oh yeah, I went to the Library on Saturday......... Not a lot to say that hasn't been said. At least it didn't get any worse in the Second half.

I suppose the writing was on the wall when the announcer was running through the team-line up and saying "Welcome back..... Davor Sukor (#cheers from Gooners#)...... Nigel Winterburn (#fecking standing ovation from Gooners#)...... Kaba Diawara (#laughs#). The Hammers started up a chant of #You only lost 6-1#, and Dave iP said "I'm not happy singing that!". Ho hum.

Niki at 14:02:45 Tuesday March 06 2001
:o)) Allo Paolo, looks like I popped by at the right time. Haven't made any plans...... Supporters Club? What time is kick-off 7.45 or 8? Missed 15 minutes drinking time at Cov.

Anyway, I stopped by to say I'm updating the Website of a Ticket Agency and just had a chat with the bod there who says that tickets for Tottenham (restricted view Ł38 face value) are selling for Ł150. And he reckons they'll get more expensive!!

Paolo at 13:38:50 Tuesday March 06 2001
PS - nice one Len, first laugh I've had in 4 days.

Paolo at 13:38:14 Tuesday March 06 2001
Frank, the cup game is on SUNDAY!!!

And while I'm, at it, can I be the first to ask - Nik, where are you drinkning before the game tomorrow?

huey at 13:17:04 Tuesday March 06 2001
plan b.

1. replace harry with alan curbishley.
2. sell lampard junior to spurs.
3. bring in Defoe and put a block on loaning out players.#
4.install a mechanism under the goal posts the will widen the goal posts of the oppositions goal by a foot.
5 Introduce the all new topless hammerettes.

Frank C at 13:14:30 Tuesday March 06 2001
Lets hope it's all wortwhile with a win Saturday. I wouldn't totally blame H for keeping half the team away Saturday. i mean the Yids didn't exactly go all out against Derby on Saturday either. Just goes to show the difference between a good team and a crap team these days is the strength in depth. So in other words it's who can fill more prawn sandwich wankers in seats to boost the old cashflow and buy and pay class players to sit on the bench for half the season. Now isn't it American Football that have special teams for defence and offence. And with Scum tie up with the NYY it just about sums it all up.

kerry at 13:11:58 Tuesday March 06 2001
d'ya know what? i think a stint in the natiowide 1st is what we need. i think it will do us some good.

Fat Fred at 12:57:10 Tuesday March 06 2001
Try this, it's the bogs dollocks

http://www.eng.playasmanager.com/

Len at 12:34:27 Tuesday March 06 2001
I hear what your saying mate, but look at it from Harry's point of view.... lkdsv lkjdhsb u7yh43p9iuh875y3 1587h-28hfub0ugevbARTW6FRB 40GRT8 H1G3l]o987f

Jonny at 10:53:52 Tuesday March 06 2001
I know this is old news but I've been away . As a fan who paid on Sat - it was a disgrace - Harry gave them that game like we could afford to lose it and allowed fans to pay money to watch a team who could string 2 passes together I'm still in a mood about it . The team sheet and performance better be a lot better or I'm gonna be very pissed off - I'm not a millionaire you know .
I wonder how many will miraculously be available for Sunday, Harry is putting too much onto F.A Cup- Arse and Pool are still in it even if we beat Tottscum.

U.H.H at 09:36:03 Tuesday March 06 2001
[Gordon]is there such a thing as a good one?

Gordon at 09:02:55 Tuesday March 06 2001
What a terrible picture of David O'Leary on the back page of the Sun today.

GT Smith at 08:53:02 Tuesday March 06 2001
Did anyone see Crossroads? Thats all we need...another bloody poxy soap on 5 days a week and repeated over the weekend.

Ahmed in Asia...putting together yet another pair of football boots for a world brand name at a penny a boot finishing his 20hour shift! at 08:50:22 Tuesday March 06 2001
Good news for our footballers. Looks as if the new system of transfers, salaries and players rights will see that players are protected from scrupulous agents and clubs who would flout EC employment laws and tie players to impossible contracts that see them exploited. About time too...it must be a tough life earning Ł20k a week + bonuses + celbrity status + flash cars and the pick of page three girls. I pity them , I really do. Just the other day I saw Igor Stimac driving a top of the range Mercedes and I was ashamed to think he could be treated this way. Some of don't know how lucky we are. I'm glad I'm not put through the same degrading situation like our professional players are.

Brad at 08:31:40 Tuesday March 06 2001
Paolo; can't remember. I think he was too busy looking at her tits!

U.H.H at 08:19:46 Tuesday March 06 2001
Dave mate, no offence but try getting out a bit more often..... p.s anything left on that last one?

Dagenham Dave's Mum at 22:09:21 Monday March 05 2001
Are you smoking that pot again. What have I told ya? Pack it in.... ah fuck this!

Dagenham Dave at 22:07:41 Monday March 05 2001
so... anyone got a lighter?

Harry Redknapp at 22:04:00 Monday March 05 2001
Coming.

Harry Redknapp's missus at 22:02:16 Monday March 05 2001
Harry, get home. Your dinner's ruined.

Harry Redknapp at 22:01:24 Monday March 05 2001
Can I have him for Wednesday?

Dagenham Dave's agent at 22:00:41 Monday March 05 2001
Dagenham Dave can be hired at very reasonable prices for all you special occasions.

Dagenham Dave at 21:58:59 Monday March 05 2001
coming.

Dagenham Dave's Mum at 21:55:55 Monday March 05 2001
I'm not. Get home Dave. Your dinner's ruined.

Dagenham Dave at 21:52:12 Monday March 05 2001
yeah fine ....she sends her love. (is anyone else enjoying this..??!!?)

Dagenham Dave at 21:50:08 Monday March 05 2001
How's Mum? Keeping well?

Dagenham Dave at 21:48:48 Monday March 05 2001
good to hear it

Dagenham Dave at 21:48:04 Monday March 05 2001
Yeah cant complain

Dagenham Dave at 21:47:44 Monday March 05 2001
So how are ya Dagenham Dave? How's life?

Dagenham Dave at 21:46:44 Monday March 05 2001
I'm rolling again ..... any one got a lighter?

Dagenham Dave at 20:21:35 Monday March 05 2001
DESPERATE FASHION VICTIM PLEA..... Has anyone got that West Ham home shirt from 1978..??? I'll pay good money. It's got a blue top half that comes down to a point half way and then it's all claret. You know the one!!! Come on .... I'll make it worth your while.

Dagenham Dave at 20:13:45 Monday March 05 2001
I'm rolling a large one .... anyone want two's......?

Dagenham Dave at 20:12:28 Monday March 05 2001
I'll be happier when we've got 40 points in the bag ...... and have run Tottenscum all over East London.

Lower West Winkle at 17:27:23 Monday March 05 2001
Paolo - The BCFC fan said "Ug?" - Just guessing......

Lower West Winkle at 17:25:02 Monday March 05 2001
Tony in Tossland:

If we're so shit, how comes your shower of septic scabs has only managed a 0-0 and a 1-0 against us this season??

I just hope I can keep my eyes open on Sunday.....yaaaaaaawn

Tony in Tottenham at 16:42:52 Monday March 05 2001
Not long now boys-I'll be back on Monday to gloat.The funny thing is in your gut you know you're already beaten. Same old West Ham, same old Soft Touch defence. At least Harry's a traditionalist!

Paolo at 15:47:02 Monday March 05 2001
Brad - what did the BC fan reply?!

Brad in East Ham at 13:37:03 Monday March 05 2001
It amazes me how quick Harry is to praise the opposition. I wish he would concentrate on his own players when we play as shit as that. What is this 'Jeykl and Hyde' display we seem to have about us. Is it just because we had a few players missing? Or is it more than that?

Anyway, funniest thing I heard all weekend was the story about Sky sports presenter Kirsty whatsherface. Her who presents the football with Matt Lorenzo. Anyway, its the Worthington Cup final between Birmingham City and Liverpool and Sky have decided to interview fans from each team to commentate on the match. The selected few are dressed in the colours of there clubs and having a break when Kirsty pops in to say hi! 'I'm a Liverpool fan' she declares to one of the contestants who is wearing a blue shirt with white front and 'BCFC' written on its chest. 'I take it you're a Liverpool fan too?' she asks him. What a prat!!

U.H.H at 12:52:14 Monday March 05 2001
I feel a bit more like commenting..........What a load of bollocks! i agree with Del,we should have sat on them and defended for 90 mins and walked away with a point. we will probabaly get the same punishment on wednesday night as well,with the money HR has to spend he should be able to construct a good 'plan b' team to cover the injuries and suspensions we are suffering.But as said so many times before he is a gambler and not a good tactician.
Also how much further up Tony Adam's arse could he stick his toungue? does he run his fan club or what?
I think i will avoid the telly till sunday.

Henri Le Quaaaaant at 12:50:11 Monday March 05 2001
I take it the answer to my question on Friday was a big, fat NO then Harry???

I don't care what happens on Wednesday, so long as we stay in the Cup, I will not accept that our season can be all over in the first effin'week in March.

Top 5 team eh?? My cock cheese!

Del at 12:26:56 Monday March 05 2001
Saturday was abysmal. As soon as we went a goal behind the game was over. Why did Redknapp play Suker and Diawara up front when he could have played Potts and Tahinen there and replaced Lampard with Ian Pearce and had 10 defenders in the side. I kow we have massive injury problems, but a flat back four was always going to struggle with Arsenal's pace up front, so we took out the quickest we've got - Dailly and put him in midfield instead of playing a back 3, 5 in midfield and 2 up front. I left with 20 minutes to go as the second half resembled a friendly and went down the pub - I should have gone at half time.

I assume with the exception of Di Canio, we will be sporting the same side on Wednesday - Chelsea's first away win for months!
Oh Bugger!

Uriah Heep at 12:13:20 Monday March 05 2001
Very 'umble I am.

Paolo at 11:05:32 Monday March 05 2001
UHH - too depressed, too pissed off. Work crap, personal life crap, football crap, youngest sprog 18 last Saturday - too much for a man to take.

Amy - "littlebabyshedevil" - you sure you're on the right site?

U.H.H at 09:02:16 Monday March 05 2001
Blimey everyone must be as depressed as me about the result.
no postings all weekend? DD/MTH/Paolo/daz.

amy the ammer in barking at 02:58:33 Monday March 05 2001
am i the only bird who comes ere then???????????????????????????????/

paul wright at 23:22:20 Friday March 02 2001
Regardless of tommororrows result against goons,as long as we STUFF THEM DIRTY YIDDLES, I will be ecstatic, god has given us one more chance to beat stinking bastards!!!(In no means am I a Religious person in case ya wondering)P.S. I Still think we will get stuffed @ highbury the library, but who gives two shits when ya F.A. CUP WINNERS!!! C`MON YOU IRONS

Ben at 22:16:31 Friday March 02 2001
Come on u Irons

Harry the Rat at 19:06:23 Friday March 02 2001
How about I have it over the wall at Highbury tonight , turn off the underground heater , match postponed, until we have a fully fit squad?????

Fat Fred at 16:51:04 Friday March 02 2001
LEEDS have announced that Brian Kidd has been appointed first team head coach as of today - United boss David O'Leary explains the move on the eve of Leeds' clash with Kidd's former club Manchester United.
The former Blackburn Rovers manager, was the Academy Director at Elland Road, but will now head the coaching staff. Kidd worked as Sir Alex Ferguson's right hand man for eight years at Old Trafford before leaving to take over as Blackburn manager in 1998.

His appointment means he will be joining a first team set-up of Manager David O'Leary, Assistant Manager Eddie Gray and Reserve Team manager Roy Aitken, who will all work together.

Kidd, appointed youth development coach by Leeds last May, has been asked to take on the new role by Leeds boss David O'Leary.

The 42-year-old Irishman wants Kidd to train the first-team squad, working alongside assistant manager Eddie Gray.

O'Leary will still be involved in training sessions but will not take them from start to finish - freeing him up to concentrate on other things.

O'Leary said: "I've made Brian Kidd the new head coach at Leeds.

"There isn't a much better coach than him in the country or in Europe.

"He has fulfilled his task as youth development coach here earlier than I thought, so I felt there was no point in keeping him in that role any longer.

"I've never had a first-team coach - so now, with Brian in place, it will give me a break and I can step away from the lads a little bit.

"Instead of taking two hours for each training session I can step in for maybe 15 or 20 minutes and oversee things."

Kidd said: "I'm delighted to move into my new role at Leeds United.

"I've thoroughly enjoyed my time here and have received great support in putting together our new youth development team.

"There are some very talented and caring people on the staff. I'm sure the new youth set-up will go from strength to strength - but when the boss invited me to change roles I was happy to oblige.

"I am looking forward to working with the outstanding group of players we have here. It is a great challenge."

Fat Fred at 16:40:18 Friday March 02 2001
Don't need a big sqwad then ?........

'Big Squad Theory Is Just Another Fergie Ruse'

THE Great Liar has triumphed again...

Last weekend's shellacking of Arsenal by Manchester United was great entertainment in itself; it also saw the victory of yet another of the fantastic myths that have been introduced into modern football by the sport's very own Pinocchio, Sir Alex Ferguson.

Don't get me wrong. As far as I know, Sir Alex doesn't tell lies in his private life; neither Lady Fergie nor young Darren have been fed a diet consisting entirely of Melton Mowbray lattice-tops. But in his professional guise, he takes care to spout an endless stream of disinformation, myth, untruth, obfuscation and fantasy in order to baffle, bewitch and befuddle his opponents. Defending his own mendacity, Sir Winston Churchill once said: ''In times of war, truth is so precious that it should be surrounded by a bodyguard of lies.'' Sir Alex believes the same about football.

And the biggest lie of all that he has foisted on the football world – and the one which has been most readily swallowed by United's rivals, and which will most likely kill them all – is the idea that You Need A Big Squad.

How many times do we hear that phrase? Is it now in the contract of all managers that whenever they are confronted by a microphone or a camera, they must say ''you have to have a big squad to win/survive/get into Europe/tile your mum's bathroom''? Because that's what they all – without exception – say, all the time. And, as last weekend's hysterical events at the self-appointed Theatre Of Dreams showed, it is a large portion of baloney...

The truth, you see, is that Manchester United do not have A Big Squad. They have a great team, but that's a very different thing. Look at the facts. While every other big club searches the far corners of the globe for anyone with two legs to help swell their already bloated first-team squad, poor old United struggle along with what other managers of other outfits would no doubt describe as ''the bare bones''.

The Premiership champions have one great goalkeeper, a basic back four of Neville G, Stam, Brown and Silvestre; Irwin and Neville P provide cover at full back; Ronny Johnsen, if he's fit, occasionally slots into the centre. In midfield, they have the fantastic four - Beckham, Scholes, Keane, Giggs – and, erm, Nicky Butt, a player most think no better than the average Prem plodder. Oh, and Quinton Fortune.

It's only up front, where they permutate Cole, Sheringham, Solskjaer and Yorke (when he's not too busy climbing the north face of some likely looking lass), that they actually rotate the staff. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but that is not A Big Squad. Indeed, it's no larger than those of the mid-Seventies.

Now compare and contrast. Arsenal, in their desperation to believe the Big Squad lie, have no less than 19 full internationals. ''Pathetique'' comes the cry from Anfield, where, contained within a squad only slightly smaller than the passenger list of the Titanic, they harbour 20 full internationals.

And then there's Chelsea, always at the head of the largeing queue. Despite selling Chris Sutton and Tore Andre Flo in recent months and having Mikael Forssell on loan at Palace, they still have 20 capped players sucking on their supporters' monetary tit. They all have Big Squads, yet have spent the last few months, as usual, choking on United's dust.

So why have they all fallen into Sir Alex's trap? Well, for the clubs, it's a matter of vanity. Buying a load of international players, only half of whom can play at any given time, makes them feel like they're running something big and important, like Barcelona, or Microsoft, or 365Corporation.

And of course the managers pay full lip service to the Big Squad Theory. Of course they do. The logic is simple. If your club does, in the current vernacular, 'spunk up' millions, it does, I'm prepared to concede, vaguely add to your chances of success. But it also greatly increases the chance of the manager hanging on to his hugely paying job.

Once the club has 'spunked up' all the dough, there is nothing left with which to buy Johnny Manager out of his contract, and the empty coffers mean that it's also much less likely that you'll be able to attract a decent replacement anyway. Bingo! Good news all round for the incumbent! So when you see David O'Leary smirking like King Dong when Leeds have just 'spunked up' Ł18m on Rio Ferdinand, it ain't just because he's got a half-decent centre-back...

So The Great Liar has won. United are still miles ahead of the 'competition', but the competition have blown all their dough. Now United will go out and spend multiple millions on Thuram, Nedved, Van Nistelrooy, Campbell and others. Then they will have an even greater team. And, for the first time, A Big Squad

Henri Le Quaaaaant at 16:39:31 Friday March 02 2001
Do we actually have enough players to field a full XI tomorrow??

Fogerty Froghopper at 13:18:10 Friday March 02 2001
Hop hop. Ribbet.

cheeky f*cker at 13:15:47 Friday March 02 2001
dont time fly by. can you believe that momentous victory at old trafford was over a month ago now. seemed like yesterday.

Happy Hammer at 13:11:40 Friday March 02 2001
I reckon we've lost 3 points this Saturday. Don't expect too much. I will be over-the-moon with a point.

Di Canio Racing in the pits, preparing my team at 12:16:47 Friday March 02 2001
Hello chaps, just registered as Di Canio Racing for the Fantasy F1 game with The Times. It's not bad at all. Only a fiver to register with 1st, 2nd & 3rd prizes being Ł20K, Ł10K & Ł5K respectively.

If anyone fansies a go, log on to www.times-f1.co.uk

Tally-ho and good luck.

The Presbyterian at 11:40:09 Friday March 02 2001
He needs to sign before noon to play tomorrow. So he has 20 mins to get pen on paper!

Jonny at 11:32:51 Friday March 02 2001
Apparently we need Hughes for Sat ( no Carrick, Cole) but past then I can't ever see him starting. He seems a bit like Lamps but less effective.
I wish we'd stop over loading squad and sign quality not quantity.
I was proud of Lamps on Wed - Oh god I sound like his dad, but I don't look like him

The Presbyterian at 07:56:24 Friday March 02 2001
Not good enough for Arse and not good enough for Everton but good enough for West Ham. Familiar story!

Dagenham Dave at 20:48:39 Thursday March 01 2001
Yes yes Yes ... Wilkinson OUT! He has not got the respect of the players ....Northern twat.

Dagenham Dave at 20:47:17 Thursday March 01 2001
Did anyone else confuse Lamps with that McCann last night...? It was easy to work out which was Frankie after a while.... everytime we lost possesion outside our own box it was McCrap..!

Dagenham Dave at 20:44:31 Thursday March 01 2001
What's everyone going on about......?????!??!?!?

Paolo at 20:26:09 Thursday March 01 2001
UHH - you can never tell, but most of them sound new. Big Vern is from the old days though - but he's only one of the regulars pissing about. Check the ip addresses, it can be quite revealing - although usually it's obvious who's who.

U.H.H at 18:02:09 Thursday March 01 2001
[Ian] really busy at the moment,no more news on the move[wheels seem to be turning really slowly]but looking forward to spending the summer in Bozeat.
[Paolo] are these all new bods posting recently or old one's making a return?
p.s Got my hair cut by J.C cousin today!!!

dalgreg in hornchurch at 16:55:26 Thursday March 01 2001
what do we reckon about signing Stephen Hughes from Everton on a free transfer?

Big Vern at 16:03:45 Thursday March 01 2001
.........Not to mention fitting up anyone who had an Irish accent, hell even an Irish sounding name!!!

Once Filf, always filf.

Sweetasanut at 15:52:04 Thursday March 01 2001
The Sweeney 2 last Saturday on Channel 4. What a film. The muts nuts, the dogs bollocks. Call it what you like it was brilliant. A hark back in the days when coppers were doing there job properly and out nicking the real villains instead of pinching motorists for minor traffic offences.

Ian in Dallas at 14:08:48 Thursday March 01 2001
UHH: well yes, I'm sorta here, but then again, sorta not... How's the move going?

Hillary Fontainbleu-Smyth at 14:05:01 Thursday March 01 2001
I think it looked like a can of Red Stripe.

hbvf at 13:46:24 Thursday March 01 2001
What did you people think of the new England shirt?

U.H.H at 13:17:20 Thursday March 01 2001
[Ian] are you still there?
Lumpard looked pretty good last night,blah,blah,blah.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------> Percy Periwinkle at 12:25:54 Thursday March 01 2001
The difference is that Paolo isn't a target man.

So where did Phil Nevill eget all that experience from which you mention?

Not in the Man United first team, that's for sure.

Gaz at 12:20:16 Thursday March 01 2001
Percy, Heskey was put on to play up front. If he drifts over to the corner flag occasionally or happens to find himself running down the wing at some stage in the game dont mean he was put on as a natural winger. Jeez! Di Canio drifts back in defence occasionally, don't make him a defender do it? Phil Neville may not be the answer to our problems, but he is a darn sight better player than most people give him credit for with bags of experience.

Paolo at 11:26:24 Thursday March 01 2001
Only just catching up with last night - sounds like Frankie had a cracking game. About time he was recognised for the quality player he is.

But why doesn't he take the corners at UP?!!!!!

Nice one Dave iP.

Percy Periwinkle at 10:59:47 Thursday March 01 2001
Benny, so what was Heskey doing playing on the right wing?

And what about Phil Neville? He's not even the best right back in his family let alone in the country.

Don at 10:19:19 Thursday March 01 2001
The following was taken from an Italian footy web page:

West Ham coach Jemi Redknapp has said Cole and Carrick will stay at his club despite they
have both linked with a move to Liverpool.

I can see how they can get confused between Jamie (Jemi) and Harry. The resemblance is uncanny.

Benny at 10:14:32 Thursday March 01 2001
Oh one other thing..I think its about time the FA got rid of Howard 'common as cow shit simple Northern folk, bloody' Wilkinson. He is shit. Give Peter Taylor back the job!

Benny at 10:11:46 Thursday March 01 2001
Well done England and in particlular to Sven. His interview after the game with Claire 'tasty' Tomlinson was refreshing too. No more verbal drival from Keegam, no more 'Karma' bollocks from Hoddle. Just honest views from a very intelligent man who knows his job and makes our past two England managers look like the Chuckle Brothers. Why do most of our managers and players come accross as thickos? Anyway, nice one England, not many teams come away with a three nil win against Spain. Frank Lampard has certainly proved himself worthy of a place. What suprised me more than anything was the players Sven chose who would never of had a lookin if Hoddle or Keegan were still in charge. How did Sven manage to spot these players and they couldn't? He also played players in positions they were comfortable in, unlike Keegan..who would attempt to play a striker in a left-back position or somfing like that. Congrats Sven.

Orangey Bloomers at 07:06:57 Thursday March 01 2001
Well done England, Well done Svennis. Two goals from Lampard corners. Any chance of him taking flag-kicks for The Hammers now?

As much chance of him taking pens when PDC is in the side, I guess.

Dave iP at 02:17:09 Thursday March 01 2001
Caroline, nice to hear from you again. Get in touch on the above address

Dave iP at 02:14:22 Thursday March 01 2001
Caroline, nice to hear from you again. Get in touch on the above

Dave iP at 02:00:18 Thursday March 01 2001
This used to be on a link on the old RJ Dawkins site. After tonight, thinking (probably naively) that we've at last turned the coner, and after the weekend, I thought it needed reposting (Nik, can you take it off and put it on its own special page where it belongs?). Read it and remember why you're West Ham...
========================================================

In honour of the eight anniversary of the great man's passing, I'd like to offer this tribute, which I wrote just after Sir Bobby died in 1993.

Interesting for me to re-read the last paragraphs (written not long after the acrimonious, abortive Bond fiasco, and while Thatcherism, in the scrawny shape of John Major, was still ruining Britain). It seems that West Ham have finally turned that corner, and are once again the pride and joy of East London. Hopefully we'll win the Cup; take Europe by storm; our midfield maestros will bring the World Cup back to its righteous home (Upton Park); and all of this will be achieved, as I so fervently hoped eight years ago, "while playing football which would make the great man proud".

Sir Bobby Moore: A Tribute by Steve Rapport / 11-Mar-93

WAY BACK in the Sixties I used to live in Ilford, just off The Drive. Every day after school, l'd cycle over to Valentines Park to play football. In those days practically every waking hour was spent playing, watching, talking or thinking about football. West Ham was the central core of my existence - everything else was just a distraction.

One particular summer evening, it must have been around 1968, l'd just finished playing with my mates and was securing my boots to the back of my bike when a little girl wandered over and started playing with them. I looked up as her Dad came over and apologised, ever so politely, with a winning smile and a fair degree of charm. I stared, but didn't speak. The man looked eerily familiar, but when your twelve you're not really very sure of anything. I mumbled something inadequate, like 'thanks', then rode off in to the sunset.

As I reached the park gates, somewhere opposite Beehive Lane, I saw my Mum and Dad. "You'll never guess who we just saw in the park" they said. "Let me guess," I replied. "Bobby Moore?". "How did you know?", they said...

That little girl who messed with my boots is called Roberta. She's 27 now, and a couple of weeks ago she had to bury her father. I know how she feels.

I WAS WORKING in my office when I heard that Sir Bobby Moore had died from cancer at the age of 51. Since last year I've lived in the land of the football philistine, so the news came via a fax from Big Joe in Peckham. For the first time since I left London for the surreal world of California, I really felt cut off from my previous life. I sat and cried, like I haven't done since my own Dad died 9 years ago. He was a West Ham nutter since his early years in Canning Town in the 20's, and he'd given me my love of one of the finest things life had to offer in the 1960's - namely, the West Ham United Football Academy.

Since I first got the news, my mates have been calling, faxing and mailing me cuttings about Bobby Moore, and every time I read them I get all choked up again. l'm genuinely devastated by the loss, and guilt-ridden that I couldn't get to Upton Park to pay my respects. I was there in spirit, believe me.

One of the (few) great things about being 36 is that I was old enough to see most of Bobby Moore's career as a Hammer. He wasn't exactly my hero: as a striker myself, that accolade fell to Geoff Hurst, a forward who embodied everything that I admired in a professional footballer. It was a white number 10 that I proudly wore on the back of my classic West Ham shirt, not a number 6. But Bobby Moore was on a different plane altogether. It wasn't just that he was the best defender in the entire history of football, the best reader of a game and, probably, the most accurate passer ever to pull on an England shirt. He was also a general, a true captain and a symbol of an era.

MY ABIDING memories of the glory days of the Academy (from 1964 to the end of that decade) are of Sir Bobby. I can see him clearly in my mind's eye, graciously moving in front of a leaden-footed forward, neatly intercepting the ball before the poor sod knows what's happened. As he moves forward from the edge of the box, his head is up, scanning the whole of the Upton Park pitch for options. His arms are pointing here and there, in a manner that lan 'Pointy Pointy' Bishop can only dream about. Inevitably, he spots big Geoff Hurst moving away from his marker into space, some forty or fifty yards upfield. With unerring accuracy, he sends the ball arcing over the half-way line, where it finds its usual home, on the chest of the Hammer's number 10.

Of course it's goals that fans usually remember, and fortunately a couple of Bobby's rare efforts are still fresh in the mind. In the midst of Geoff Hurst's utter humiliation of Sunderland in '68 came a Bobby Moore special, a thundering free-kick from 25 yards. A couple of weeks later, in a game that sums up the decade for me, he thumped a spectacular thirty yarder in our 4-3 win over QPR. As the ball flew from his boot, Sir Bobby raised his arm in acknowledgement, turned around and headed back to the half-way line, without even bothering to watch the ball hit the back of the net. How could I ever forget a game like that? Just reading the list of scorers - Moore, Peters, Hurst and Redknapp - makes me all dewy eyed.

BOBBY MOORE's death came as a shock, not just because it was untimely and sudden, but for a host of significant reasons. Bobby was more than just the captain of West Ham and England: he was the blond-haired, blue-eyed symbol of a happy, successful time when Britain seemed like a great place to live. His passing emphasises how much has changed for the worse since West Ham won the World Cup, and after fourteen years of greed, misrule, mismanagement, recession and depression, it appears that football no longer has the charm to ease the pain. The are no more Bobby Moore's, no more Geoff Hurst's, and no more Trevor Brooking's to take us away from the mundane grind of everyday life.

Also brought into sharp focus is the acrimony of the last eighteen months and the sad state of the club that we love. The ignorant, short-sighted board members and their stupid scheme left the club heavily in the red, and without a hope of strengthening a squad that would have been laughed off the pitch in Sir Bobby's day. However, now that the memory of Bobby Moore marshalling his troops, resplendent in his glorious, unsullied claret and blue shirt, is once more in everyone's thoughts, there must be a glimmer of hope that West Ham can pull things round. The huge crowds at the last couple of home games, and the stunning display of sadness and affection for the East End's favourite son, prove that the time is right for the club and the fans to honour Bobby Moore in the best way possible - by rallying together and helping West Ham to reclaim its rightful place at the heart of English football. And let's hope that they achieve it by playing football which would make the great man proud.

Caroline on night shift at 01:32:39 Thursday March 01 2001
I just want to say well done to Frank for his performance for England; obviously I'm biased, as anyone who remembers the Alf's of old will know, but I thought he played really well with one or two high quality passes and the great corners. He played quite a lot better than I expected, at least. A pity about JC not playing, I was hoping he'd get the chance to show his talent and really stand out in that team - but there is and will be ample time and chances for him to do that in the future.

Dagenham Dave at 18:38:09 Wednesday February 28 2001
Dont get me started with rogo....f*ck it I'm having a smoke

Del at 16:52:46 Wednesday February 28 2001
Of all the overseas players, the Scandanavians consistently prove the best adapted to English football. Redknapp is mad if he thinks he's going to get a better return from the likes of Song
GAMBLER!

Ronan at 16:33:03 Wednesday February 28 2001
2-2.5 million!!!!...TOO BLOODY MUCH???
Song cost that much,and he is worse than anything I have seen in the premier league!!!
by 'eck Harry you are a gambler!!!!!!!!!!

Lower West Winkle at 12:55:08 Wednesday February 28 2001
HANNU TIHINEN ORDERED HOME!

from our Scandanivian correspondent

Finnish international Hannu Tihinen is on loan at West Ham until the 6th of March and unless the club decide to buy him his Norwegian club Viking will not let him stay a day longer, with the Hammers hoping that he can stay an extra week.

"If West Ham don’t want to by him now, he is going home and will meet him for training with us the 7th of March. We will not agree on any delay," said Viking director Bjarne Berntsen, who also knocked back Harry Redknapp’s claim about Viking wanting Ł4 million for the player.

He added: "We normally don’t talk sums in the media on occasions like this, but Ł4 million is far from the truth."

MiDAS qualified guess is that Viking are demanding between Ł2m and 2.5m million for the central defender.

Which is still too much !!!

How fucking tight is that?????????

Dirty Dick in the City at 12:10:34 Wednesday February 28 2001
HARRY'S Ł40m TAUNT

West Ham boss Harry Redknapp has claimed that he could win the Premiership 'no problem' and all he needs is Ł40m !

Redknapp was appearing on Channel 5's 'Stars & Cars' when he, tongue in cheek, said that Rivaldo was fed up at Barcelona and has always wanted to play for The Hammers while Figo, sick of paella, knew of the pie and mash shops in the East End. That may well have been a joke, but Harry looked deadly serious when he said, sitting on his S-Class Merc, that the only thing preventing The Hammers from winning the title was money - some Ł40m of it

Big Vern at 10:36:39 Wednesday February 28 2001
If anyone on here is still interested in football, it looks like Joe-boy may make it tonight - latest news from the BBC........

Paul Scholes and Joe Cole face a race against time to be fit for England's first game under new manager Sven Goran Eriksson.

Cole needs a late fitness test on an ankle injury he picked up in training while Scholes is recovering from a bout of gastro-enteritis.

Eriksson is hoping both will be cleared to play, following the withdrawal of fellow midfielders Kieron Dyer, Steve McManaman, Michael Carrick and Ray Parlour.

If I could have 25 players like Paul Scholes I'd be delighted

Sven Goran Eriksson
England goalkeeping coach Ray Clemence said the prospects looked good for both players.

He said Cole's injury is not serious and Scholes is now eating well following the stomach bug which delayed his joining up with the squad.

"They left Joe out of training on Tuesday just as a precaution. He is to have have a fitness test before training today but it is nothing serious and the medical staff feel he will be fit."

The uncapped West Ham star will be desperate for the all-clear so he can make it into Eriksson's final 18-man squad for his senior debut.

U.H.H at 09:57:27 Wednesday February 28 2001
Bloody hell Dave! give us a bit more warning next time.

Dagen dave at 23:18:24 Tuesday February 27 2001
So..... West Ham for the cup yeah..?

DD at 23:17:06 Tuesday February 27 2001
schhhhmokin'! 30 years down the line .... i'll look back on these evenings with a smile..... yeah

DD at 23:12:16 Tuesday February 27 2001
Anyone want two's??

Dagenham Dave at 23:10:55 Tuesday February 27 2001
Some nice gear .... solid. Steady heart rate. Good tunes. Great times.

Dagenham Dave at 23:10:08 Tuesday February 27 2001
I'm having a late smoke ... anyone care to join me...?

Ronan at 23:08:33 Tuesday February 27 2001
Come on,Tihinen is quality! look at it this way,he is going to cost less than Camara and Song together,and is twice the players they are together!!! they are complete pants!!!
and nearly 1/5 of the price for Rio and you can't say that isn't a bargain and a half decent replacement.
Im with all the pro Tihinen's on this one!!

Paolo - in triplicate at 22:31:43 Tuesday February 27 2001
The Spurs game is sold out at an avaerage ticket price of about 38 smackeroonies - and we could have sold thousands more tickets. Makes you think.

Makes you think that, despite what we might feel, the board made the correct commercial decision.

And makes you think just what a fucking wonderful club WHU is, that that many people are prepared to pay that much to watch us knock Spurs out of the cup.

Brings a lump to the throat.

Paolo at 22:22:41 Tuesday February 27 2001
PS - nice to see some footy chat on here today. If Harry doesn't buy Tahinen just because he's miffed that he's had to pay a decent price, then that just proves what I'm always saying - he's a gambler, not a manager.

And I'll still be saying that, whatever happens at Cardiff.

Paolo - on the evening shift at 22:20:31 Tuesday February 27 2001
Dazza - no way, and I speak as someone who can't read Alf's at work if anyone swears. But football without swearing??? It would be like sex without cries of "Oh, oh big boy, do it to me again and again". And that would be very boring.

Dave iP at 17:46:25 Tuesday February 27 2001
I managed to get get arse in there, but only in a Daily Express sort of way

Henri LQ at 17:22:07 Tuesday February 27 2001
Daz - Wouldn't have it mate, couldn't even get "shit" on there.

Looks good though.

Dazza at 17:17:54 Tuesday February 27 2001
do us a favour please chaps... try out my demo page here please and let me know if encounter any problems.... also try some of your most foulest language you can think of too...
thanks

http://www.zone1media.co.uk/drive/mboard/index.asp

FF at 16:58:00 Tuesday February 27 2001
Swap, swap, I wouldn't swap faces....

Fat Fred at 16:57:06 Tuesday February 27 2001
Re Hannibal, Verger was not as gruesome as portrayed in the book but wouldn't sway faces with him for any amount of money. I enjoyed the film, the Director only made a few changes from the book and they seemed to improve the story. The boiled egg starring Ray Liota was priceless, a mixture of screams and laughter - some sick pervs in the audience. Well worth going along though.

Henri LQ at 16:22:13 Tuesday February 27 2001
Shall we call it the C word then???

Griff at 16:20:04 Tuesday February 27 2001
Dazza - I vote yes, if I see the word Camara again I'll be fucking livid.

Henri LQ at 16:09:18 Tuesday February 27 2001
SINCLAIR!!!!!

We're missing the boy, that's all. Our attacking options will seem far better when he is back, trust me.

Camara needs to fuck off, sharpish.

Freddie needs it in to feet, and to keep himself on side. I can't understand why he keeps getting caught, he is about five times the speed of most of the defenders in the league, so he could be about 15 yards on side and still have the advantage.

The team just seem nervous about something to me, like they don't have the faith equivalent to their obvious talent.

I'm fucked if I know what the problem is.........

Dazza at 16:08:17 Tuesday February 27 2001
can I have a vote please people.....
who would welcome the prevention of the use of swear words on Alfs???

Del at 15:40:34 Tuesday February 27 2001
The Tottscum game is sold out already. I have been very impressed with Tahinen I would sell Camara to raise ten pence to put towards the buying price. Redknapp is very happy to play the transfer system card when he wants to, but he has spent out on Camara, Dailly and Song. I really believe he just wants to live up to his wheeler dealer image and buy bargains rather than risk a large sum on a quality player. Tahinen would be a long term acquisition, Stimac will bugger off as soon as he is not first choice, Pearce has probably only got one more season in him before his age finds him out (although if any player could prove me wrong it's him). Will Foxe become the next Webster and never play? I agree that we are desperate for an attacking leftsided midfielder. The only guy I can think of is the bloke at Ipswich.
Gary Oldman was fantastically gruesome - a small headed elephant man!

Frank C at 15:38:04 Tuesday February 27 2001
Who's this bloke Hargreaves in the U21's playing for Bayern Munich?

Spot the mistake at 14:48:37 Tuesday February 27 2001
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport/hi/english/football/teams/w/west_ham_utd/newsid_1192000/1192517.stm

The final word at 14:27:59 Tuesday February 27 2001
"As I said before, im not going to pay Ł4m for him.

"I like him, he's a good player, but for that fee not a chance. We'll see what happens."

C&B at 13:53:25 Tuesday February 27 2001
A further indication of Tihinen's value is the dearth of clubs showing any interest to nip in and pinch him. Only Boro and they are so desperate they would sign ANYONE for ANY amount of money.

Let's wait for Soma. Then you'll all be saying "good job we didn't buy Hannu"!

Frank in eating a bolied egg at 13:24:07 Tuesday February 27 2001
Fat Fred - what was Gary Oldmans character like ? you get a mental picture form the book but I'm intrigued to know how gruesome it was on film.

Oh and Tihinen - no more at fault for any goals than Rio was before he left - Ł4m is a bargain for a young defender especially with Ian Pearce's injury problems and when you consider the limited shelf life of Igor and Physco

Fat Fred at 13:18:04 Tuesday February 27 2001
Saw "Hannibal" the other night, will never eat a boiled egg again.....

Adam at 13:14:38 Tuesday February 27 2001
I thought it was Tihinen who drifted off and left Andy Booth to head in that offside goal (that looked pretty level)and he also got dominated by Niall Quinn at home, unlike Stimac away. But apart from that I have been impressed with him.

Latest.... at 13:10:17 Tuesday February 27 2001
Carrick in Ł22m move to Toon Army.

Ha ha ha..... at 13:09:10 Tuesday February 27 2001
DANNY Dichio reckons young Sunderland midfielder
Tommy Butler is in the same class as England whiz kid
Joe Cole.

Joe at 13:03:46 Tuesday February 27 2001
I have to agree with Paolo. I too have been in a good position to have seen what Tihinen is all about and he is without doubt worth every penny of the Ł4m pound asking price. He reads the game well, plays it simple to our creative players and very rarely (if ever) loses concentration (unlike our Rio). People would refer to Rio as the new Bobby Moore. I think Tihen deserves to be compared with Mooro more than Rio for the above qualities. Rio is an excellent player but he was also guilty of some terrible blunders and lapses in concenttration. You only had to see his mistake Saturday that let Les Ferdinand through. Tihenen has Bobby Moores coolness and intelligence. To loose Tihennen would be a big blow. I would be very dissapointed. Harry, SIGN HIM UP YOU PRAT!!

Joe at 13:02:49 Tuesday February 27 2001
I have to agree with Paolo. I too have been in a good position to have seen what Tihinen is all about and he is without doubt worth every penny of the Ł4m pound asking price. He reads the game well, plays it simple to our creative players and very rarely (if ever) loses concentration (unlike our Rio). People would refer to Rio as the new Bobby Moore. I think Tihen deserves to be compared with Mooro more than Rio for the above qualities. Rio is an excellent player but he was also guilty of some terrible blunders and lapses in concenttration. You only had to see his mistake Saturday that let Les Ferdinand through. Tihenen has Bobby Moores coolness and intelligence. To loose Tihennen would be a big blow. I would be very dissapointed. Harry, SIGN HIM UP YOU PRAT!!

Paolo at 12:36:39 Tuesday February 27 2001
PS - I'm using a PC I haven't used for months today and when I went into Alf's I got postings for last October! Freaky!

Paolo - at lunch! at 12:34:49 Tuesday February 27 2001
We sit right behind one of the goals at UP, so I've had ample opportunity to watch Tihinen in the flesh, as well as seeing him on TV, and he is without doubt the best defender we've had since Rio. He reads the game as well as Rio, is always in the right place at the right time, and is totally reliable and unflappable - and he doesn't have odd moments when he is 'missing'like Rio,or make the rickets that Stimac does. The only critisism I've heard of him is he doesn't pass the ball well, but I think that is a missunderstanding - he doesn't make long 'passes' upfield, he just concentrates on getting the ball out to the nearest player who is free to do something with it. If you watch him, his passing is very intelligent, and he never gets caught with the ball in front of goal like some of our defenders.

The man is rock solid talent and a bargain at Ł4m. If we let him go because H thinks they're trying to pull a fast one, we will live to regret it, big time.

C&B at 12:01:20 Tuesday February 27 2001
Nor would Bobby Moore with Stepanovs and Grim-ando beside him!!

BT Bertie at 11:28:47 Tuesday February 27 2001
Phone lines have died into the ticket office

Henri Le Quaaaaant at 11:25:04 Tuesday February 27 2001
I meant Ashley Cole, obviously.

Henri Le Quaaaaant at 11:24:08 Tuesday February 27 2001
What about him???

He didn't do so well at the weekend, did he?

C&B at 10:51:34 Tuesday February 27 2001
But what have we seen? A couple of goal line clearances and going missing a lot leaving Dailly to sweep up. I'd rather wait for Soma and Foxe who the coaching staff have higher hopes for.

Frank C at 10:48:05 Tuesday February 27 2001
I think at todays prices that 4 million is a bargain from what we've seen of the guy...let's not forget that wanker Babb was valued at 5 million not too long ago....

C&B at 06:26:30 Tuesday February 27 2001
"Snap him up" suggests a bargain whereas 4 million would equal our record signing. Is he worth that? I really think not. Besides, look at what we already have to come at CB - Soma, Foxe, Angus, etc. As you say, let's buy a left sided player instead. What about Ashley Cole?

Dazza at 22:57:25 Monday February 26 2001
Dave - i think there is quite a good selection of pics on the redevelopment at KUMB

Dagenham Dave at 20:01:18 Monday February 26 2001
We should get shot of both Song and Camara .... hopefully we'll get a few quid! Left side wing back must be a priority... just can't think of one!

Dagenham Dave at 19:59:22 Monday February 26 2001
We MUST buy Tihinen. He's quality. Stimac and Psycho are getting on a bit so lets snap him up.

Dagenham Dave at 19:59:11 Monday February 26 2001
we MUST but Tihinen. He's quality. Stimac and Psycho are getting on a bit so lets snap him up.

Dagenham Dave at 19:58:00 Monday February 26 2001
Right... So Niki is the daddy then? Nik ... how about a few snap shots of the redevelopment of UP for the oversea's fans?

C&B at 15:30:11 Monday February 26 2001
We have too many centre backs and so 4 million can be better spent. Like on Schemmel or a left back or a holding player.

Ian B at 14:13:57 Monday February 26 2001
I cant beleive Harry is fucking around with Tihinen when Middleboro are sniffing around ready to pounce on a player who has proved himself an excellent asset to the team. Come on Harry, stop fucking around and sign him.

West Ham Fan at 13:56:58 Monday February 26 2001
What a sight. Not only the scoreline but see supposedly 'hardcore Arse fans' leaving after only 30 mins of the game. Wankers. A backbone like soggy bread!

dalgreg in hornchurch at 12:59:11 Monday February 26 2001
UHH - cant understand Harry's reasoning behind Camara - the crowd started signing 'we want suker on the pitch' and when camara got subbed they sung 'cheerio cheerio cheerio' - on the subject of suker, played OK having been out for months should have scored thorugh from a great move between him and PDC when he only had walsh to beat.

Paolo at 12:29:00 Monday February 26 2001
Got an e.mail Friday with a virus in it, it came from 'PMI Contruction' - does that mean anything to anyone on here?

Nice one Tim, enjoy spending the money!

tim in yorkshire at 11:14:10 Monday February 26 2001
you might want to read this
i live near bradford and my freind, a bradford s/ticket holder gave me his ticket for saturday while he was off skiing.Sitting amongst bradford fans in their family section i was the only one cheering when we went one up.
Got a few grumbles behind me but it was ok.When bradford scored it was obviously mayhem and i received a ripped up programme threw at me.A couple of hand gestures from the younger ones etc but you just grin and bear it dont you?
So when we went ahead near the end i was up again to the tune of a few "southern wankers" etc and general hissing.I pointed out to one or two of them that they should really be enjoying watching the future of english football because its quite likely that its the last time they will see it at valley parade again , save for a cup match. Anyway the final whistle went and a few pleasantries were exchanged and i wished them good luck against rotherham in the league next year...
Well. i got out alive and proceeded to j.wood bookmakers in bradford where i drew the proceeds of my bet.
5pounds on lamps to score the first goal doubled with a 2-1 west ham win.combined odds of 70 -1 gave me a return of Ł355 as i had the foresight to pay the tax.
They wondered why i was laughing at their insults.
Bye bye bradford and thank you west ham

Frank C at 10:40:51 Monday February 26 2001
There's one big difference between '66 and our boys now. I wonder how long Hurst Moore and Peters would have remained at the club if the current money oriented game was in place then. Cole, lamps and Carrick on the world stage will open up the bidding to either foriegn or home clubs....who would have thought RIO would be sold after about two seasons in top flight...get ready for the bids....Adam: Not a big rugby fan myself, however having moved here to Limerick which is the capital of Munster rugby, you appreciate the fanatics they are...if they get to the final, and it's at Twickenham you should go along...it will be different believe me.

U.H.H at 10:37:33 Monday February 26 2001
Morning Comrades,how i laughed yesterday at the Arse and that twat Seaman[not in goal for country]?.
Well done Brum,gave L'pool a run for their money.
And what was really an expected result for us. From all accounts not as comfortable as it should have been, good stuff from Lumpard[taken his time to find form]and what was HR doing with Camara? how did Suker do? not heard on that one.

Kristian in Oslo at 10:36:38 Monday February 26 2001
Thank you, West Ham. Nice weekend, had to pull out a bottle of bubblies(!) to celebrate WHU`s victory and Spurs`s defeat. Lovely stuff! (then again, I`d use any excuse..*cough*

And remember... at 07:34:58 Monday February 26 2001
Manchester United 6 Arsenal 1

Manchester United 0 West Ham 1

Bradford 1 West Ham United 2

Bradford 2 Chelsea FC 0

C&B at 07:19:44 Monday February 26 2001
More likely we'll be on the end of a fiercesome back lash.

Good result Saturday, mind. Pity Carrick might be injured for Wednesday.

Adam at 23:10:48 Sunday February 25 2001
I had a nice little treble on saturday. 3 aways, West Ham, Leeds and wait for it... Millwall.
I actually went to Twickenhem on Saturday, dont really like Rugby but got tickets for Harlequins V Newcastle. I spent the whole time on my radio checking up on the Hammers.
One thing i've got to say about Rugby, is how quiet and reserved the fans can be for a cup final.
Can't wait to get back to real football next week at Highbury, i reckon we may have a chance if Wenger persists on playing Stepanovs, Luzhny and Grimandi.

Paolo at 22:20:32 Sunday February 25 2001
DD - Nik runs this site, I just post a lot because I don't have a life.

Dagenham Dave at 21:54:45 Sunday February 25 2001
The redevelopment of Upton Park could be put in picture form ...??? Any plans to start snapping the building site that is the west stand??

Dagenham Dave at 21:53:34 Sunday February 25 2001
Coz I have a suggestion about the site .. do i speak to you...?

Dagenham Dave at 21:53:04 Sunday February 25 2001
So Paulo... are you the guv'nor of this site then...?

Dagenham Dave at 21:47:53 Sunday February 25 2001
Parlour, McManaman and Dyer all out the squad ..... That's gotta be good news for our boys.

Dagenham Dave at 21:46:57 Sunday February 25 2001
Darn technology ... just can't keep up with itself!

Paolo - now on IC24 at 12:35:55 Sunday February 25 2001
But now I can!!! Weirdness.

dg in hx at 12:34:47 Sunday February 25 2001

Paolo at 12:33:48 Sunday February 25 2001
Needless to say, I can't see the posting I've just written!!!!!

Paolo - on a lazy Sunday afternoon at 12:33:12 Sunday February 25 2001
Nick/Dazza - I've got to the bottom (almost) of this delayed posting thing. I usually use Freeserve Hometime from home, and yesterday at 5pm I still couldn't see the posting I wrote just before 2. But when I switched to IC24 (as I have to sometimes because Freeserve is SO slow!!!), I could see the posting - but, weirdly, when I switched back to Freeserve I COULDN'T see it!!!

So using this crap Freeserve 'service' isn't just delaying my postings, it seems to be giving me a view of Alf's which is hours old. Any idea what on earth's going on? And why does it only seem to affect Alf's?

dalgreg in hornchurch at 12:30:18 Sunday February 25 2001
anyone who was at Bradford yesterday would now be able to confirm how shit Camara really is - what was H thinking when he signed that total waste of space. On the subject of FLJ I was one of his biggest knockers but will now take it all back,over the last few weeks he has been class and yesterday he played himself into Svens team for Wednesday. one final point though, it was my first trip to Valley Parade; a div 2 ground for a div 2 team

Dagenham Dave at 17:22:46 Saturday February 24 2001
Well done Frankie ... and well done lads ...now lets get on a decent run

Paolo - at the weekend at 17:13:04 Saturday February 24 2001
Bloody Southampton! We'd have gone up two places if they hadn't won at Boro - typical isn't it, that Boro's run comes to an end just as we need it to cary on!

Wouldn't like to be a Sunderland fan at the moment though - out of the cup and starting to slide! Bet they finish the season with sweet FA.

Paolo - at the weekend at 16:53:03 Saturday February 24 2001
2-1 away! You little beauties! Both goals from Lampard as well. Let's hear the Lampard haters explain that one.

Paolo - at the weekend at 13:44:01 Saturday February 24 2001
Three WHU players (plus Rio) in the England squad!!

And, bizarrely, three players called Cole!

And it's snowing!!

JACOB at 02:33:49 Saturday February 24 2001

Paolo - on the night shift at 02:23:02 Saturday February 24 2001
Whats with everyone assuming I don't know how to sort out my internet settings?!!! Of course I've got it set to refresh every time I visit the page! But that isn't the problem - must be something to do with Freeserve. Should have known all I was going to get for #5 a month was bollocks!

Jonny Sandilansd in Harpenden at 00:30:16 Saturday February 24 2001
We're doing freat in the cup.no-one will disagree with that, but its noexcuse to be 14th in the league.Harry has got to get the team playing well on a regular basis, and get 2 new left backs under the age of 50 .

Dagenham Dave at 18:12:32 Friday February 23 2001
All three boys got in then... well done lads. ... but let's not forget the dodgy league position we find ourselves in! Chris Powell, 2 Nevilles, McCann??, James and Butt .... Bloody hell Sven ... and he left out Barry! Ut-oh!

Dagenham Dave at 18:04:12 Friday February 23 2001
What a great 2nd half Liverpool v Roma ..... Nothing quite beats a European game when it's "kicking off" all over the pitch. Great to watch eh?

Mike the Hammer at 15:10:39 Friday February 23 2001
Brillo,a bit awkward when he is out for the rest of the season mate.....

Brillo at 15:01:24 Friday February 23 2001
No Tricky then..to be expected I suppose. What a waste.

ENGLAND SQUAD at 14:31:45 Friday February 23 2001

England squad for friendly against Spain: Seaman (Arsenal), Martyn (Leeds), James (Aston Villa), Wright (Ipswich), G Neville (Man Utd) P Neville (Man Utd), Brown (Man Utd), Ferdinand (Leeds), Campbell (Tottenham), Ball (Everton), Carragher (Liverpool), Ashley Cole (Arsenal), Ehiogu (Middlesbrough), Powell (Charlton), Dyer (Newcastle), Beckham (Man Utd), Scholes (Man Utd), McManaman (Real Madrid), Carrick (West Ham), J Cole (West Ham), Lampard (West Ham), Parlour (Arsenal), Butt (Man Utd), McCann (Sunderland), Barmby (Liverpool), Heskey (Liverpool), Owen (Liverpool), Fowler (Liverpool), Andy Cole (Man Utd), Sheringham (Man Utd), Phillips (Sunderland).

Mister Magoo at 14:24:40 Friday February 23 2001
Can't see past the end of my nose let alone a Hammers win.

Niki at 14:02:23 Friday February 23 2001
Allo hammers. Did anyone see the Liverpool-Roma game last night? What was that Ref on do ya reckon? Large Backhander I'll bet! Nice touch from the BBC playing Arrivederci Roma in the closing credits.

Browser refresh problems: You lot need to change your settings so that the page refreshes automatically. I expect you're using Internet Explorer (5 hopefully) so here's how to do it in IE5:

From the TOOLS menu (on the grey menu-bar at the top) choose INTERNET OPTIONS. The GENERAL tab will be displayed, click on the SETTINGS button (under the TEMPORARY INTERNET FILES bit) and check the radio button that says EVERY VISIT TO THE PAGE (under the CHECK FOR NEWER VERSIONS OF STORED PAGES: bit). That should do the trick.

News just in.... at 12:04:32 Friday February 23 2001
Ostensibly Heterosexual Man
Constantly Threatening To Put Objects
Up Coworkers' Asses
IRVING, TX-- Though married and
ostensibly heterosexual, Westech Data
Systems office manager Douglas Briar is
constantly threatening to anally penetrate
male coworkers with office supplies. "Keep
it up," Briar warned coworker Trent
Lonegan Monday, "and I'll ram this toner
cartridge up your ass." Briar has made
similar threats involving staplers,
three-hole punches, coffee pots, and rolls
of fax paper.

U.H.H at 12:00:34 Friday February 23 2001
[Ian]just got your post,this delay seems to getting worse.
I would love to tell you where but not on the net[all the weirdo's you get here] but it's near the shops.

DiP at 11:47:30 Friday February 23 2001
Paolo, have you checked your cache settings @ home (NN: Preferences, Advanced, Cache - Document in cache is compared..., Every Time; IE: Internet Options, General, Temporary Internet files, Settings, Check for newer versions of stored pages, Every visit to the page).

HTH

Helpdesk Dave

Paolo at 11:34:00 Friday February 23 2001
House buying - solicitors - wankers - bastards - total rip off!!

UHH - I get posting delays, but only on home PC - sometimes a few minutes, sometimes hours before my postings appear. Very frustrating, especially as I tend to popst two or three things at a time!!

Perhaps Nik or Dazza can explain this?!

V busy at the moment by the way. And bloody STRESSED!!!!

U.H.H at 11:24:18 Friday February 23 2001
What's going on with this site? where's everyone gone?
Ian/Adam?

Ian in Northampton at 11:08:00 Friday February 23 2001
UHH: so where, roughly, is it in the village? Or is even that tempting fate?

For Sale: at 10:57:52 Friday February 23 2001

One wife. Good condition, one previous owner. First time starter. Reliable. Genuine mileage. Needs some attention. Ideal for first timer. P/Exchange considered. Genuine reason for sale. I have a newer racier model.

U.H.H at 10:37:18 Friday February 23 2001
[Adam] im looking at a bill for the best part of Ł2000, thats without a fee for the set up on the mortgage.
I have been told by a good source that you should put your foot down with solicitors when spending that much money,as it does not take them that long to process 'things'.
Also watch out for hidden 'admin'charges on your final invoice.

Adam at 09:22:37 Friday February 23 2001
UHH, I am also in the process of buying a house. am also getting crap from Solicitors.
They get untold money for taking ages doing a simple job.

U.H.H at 09:01:33 Friday February 23 2001
No Sinc's for the rest of the season!

U.H.H at 08:04:57 Friday February 23 2001
There seems to be a delay in the postings appearing on the screen. Anybody else finding that?
[Ian] no it's an older house[would that be second hand then]?solicitors giving us some crap about how long it will take to shuffle a few bits of paper, still aiming for April 01.
Bradford game very important[as the almost non existant Paolo say's]but i think we will do it with a comfortable 2-3 goals.
England team announced today,Carrick, Cole,Lampard?

nolvia at 03:18:10 Friday February 23 2001

Nearly Reformed Virtual Gambler in Betting Hell at 00:09:08 Friday February 23 2001
Why is the bookies always shut these days Dazza?

Paolo at 21:17:18 Thursday February 22 2001
EVERY game is a big game now, DD.

Dagenham Dave at 18:10:31 Thursday February 22 2001
Bradford is just the sort of banana skin we seem to slip on .... Check the tables gentlemen... this is a BIG game

Ian in Northampton at 16:56:20 Thursday February 22 2001
Hey, Brillo: didn't you used to be with Dr. Feelgood, those arch exponents of Canvey Island rock? You and Wilko Johnson and - what was 'is name - The Big Figure? And a drummer whose name escapes me. "Stupidity" - one of the great live albums....

Ian in Northampton at 16:54:57 Thursday February 22 2001
UHH: not so far as I know. The F&M scare isn't nearly so much fun as the S&M scare we had in the village a year or so back... Are you moving into a brand new house then?

Brillo at 16:51:56 Thursday February 22 2001
Is it true that Frank Lampard Senior once owned a chain of Dry Cleaners?

U.H.H at 16:33:59 Thursday February 22 2001
Hiya Matey,This moving lark is a load of Bollocks,being told this afternoon probably wont be in new house for next 5-8 weeks.
Has any of the farms around your area been quarantined[?]in the F&M scare?

Ian in Northampton at 16:16:55 Thursday February 22 2001
UHH: hello, I'm back from my five hour meeting....

U.H.H at 16:04:00 Thursday February 22 2001
What was the two scientist's called? beaker? or something.
we really should keep Hannu, One of the oldies will probably knock it on the head next season, and he really does look good.Dont let him go Harry you tight arse.

Jonny at 15:54:08 Thursday February 22 2001
I can't think of a muppet to be - but Nige Winterburn looks a bit like Gonzo???!!!

Jonny at 15:51:45 Thursday February 22 2001
Back to tickets - the prices are disgraceful, and we have the most expensive kit in Britain (fact).
When UP is finished they'd better be Ł10 a go - unless we're all bankrupt by then.
Every other club in the Prem wants Hannu - which is why we can't let him be a star somewhere else. Also his sell on price will make it worth it.

U.H.H at 15:23:46 Thursday February 22 2001
Ah come on,does'nt any one want to play?
What about 4 million for Hannu?

Paul Mycock at 14:48:05 Thursday February 22 2001
I had a Burger King[Big King meal with coke].

Paul Mycock at 13:23:51 Thursday February 22 2001
Im just nipping out for some dinner,does anyone want anything?

Orangey Bloomers at 11:49:39 Thursday February 22 2001
Team for Saturday 4-3-1-2

Schemmel Dailly Stimac Nige

Cole Carrick Lamps

Paolo

Kanoute Suker

G-string at 11:42:06 Thursday February 22 2001
2-0 easy,i hope Suker does get to play.

Orangey Bloomers at 10:35:46 Thursday February 22 2001
Score prediction for Saturday:

Bradford 0 West Ham United 2 (Di Canio, Suker)

U.H.H at 10:30:06 Thursday February 22 2001
Is everyone hiding cause it's half-term?
Ian are you about today?

Ron and Reg at 09:05:11 Thursday February 22 2001
I dont care as long as they dont score against us.

Orangey Bloomers at 08:24:04 Thursday February 22 2001
Hats off to Super Leeds?

U.H.H at 08:20:12 Thursday February 22 2001
Morning chaps,did anyone else have a good laugh at arse last night? nice to see Foe again[get him back]

Miss Piggy at 21:39:56 Wednesday February 21 2001
hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiyaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh

Paolo at 21:21:55 Wednesday February 21 2001
And it's Paolo, with an 'o'!!!!

Paolo at 21:21:24 Wednesday February 21 2001
DD - Alf's just goes like this sometimes. You wait until summer!

Dagenham Dave at 21:02:31 Wednesday February 21 2001
Who are all these muppets???? Paulo do something!!!

James Caspell at 20:42:04 Wednesday February 21 2001
West Ham = Ken Livingstone - 'Bubbly', Has lots of promise but never actually does anything.

Paolo at 18:01:22 Wednesday February 21 2001
20 mins from beer o'clock!!

Dazza at 17:22:08 Wednesday February 21 2001
the same way they get the words in sticks of rock

That Bloke off the telly at 16:57:20 Wednesday February 21 2001
How do they get the stripes in toothpaste?
Answers on a postcard to.........

Ubald.Henrietta.Horatio in Bozeat. at 16:52:06 Wednesday February 21 2001

U.H.H at 16:45:25 Wednesday February 21 2001
Can we all start using our proper names now.......oops!

Heimey Goldsteinberg at 16:43:15 Wednesday February 21 2001
Enough with the stereo-types already!

Ian in Tel Aviv at 16:05:39 Wednesday February 21 2001
MtH: Bjork Schmork already my life.

Mike the Hammer at 15:54:30 Wednesday February 21 2001
I'd like to throw cooking implements at her.I said bork...not bjork!

Paul Mycock at 15:49:37 Wednesday February 21 2001
[Adam/Reg]That's nothing i've got three testicles.

Ian in Reykjavik at 15:46:09 Wednesday February 21 2001
MtH: what's the sudden fascination for female Icelandish singers?

Ian in Northampton at 15:45:10 Wednesday February 21 2001
UHH: "everyone's got to be somewhere" - right?

Mike the Hammer,want in g to be the Sweish chef in the Muppets at 15:44:36 Wednesday February 21 2001
bor,di bordy boo,di doo,gerdish gerdoo,bordy,bor,bordy bor,bork,bork bork (throwing cooking implements over my shoulders)

Ian not in Oslo any more at 15:44:25 Wednesday February 21 2001
Jack H: yup!

U.H.H at 15:43:09 Wednesday February 21 2001
[Dazza]Where's every one else?

Adam at 15:39:40 Wednesday February 21 2001
It sure is a weird thing, Reg.
But what about those strands of DNA in every one of our cells which are different in every single person.
Amazing.

THE CLARET AVENGER at 15:33:01 Wednesday February 21 2001
OOOH we're soooooo scared Tony.
If we're playing at being Muppets can i be Kermit?

Dazza at 15:32:10 Wednesday February 21 2001
you can tell its half term cant you.....

Reg Table at 15:32:04 Wednesday February 21 2001
Isn't the human body a funny old thing. I mean the next time you're home alone, take all yer clothes and look in the mirror..I mean really look in the mirror at this wierd thing before you. Its so funny!

Tony from Totenham at 15:29:39 Wednesday February 21 2001
You West Ham muppets are in for a pasting on Quarter Final day-not cos the year ends in a one, but cos you're shit-and you know you are.

Jack Hargreaves in The shed. at 15:27:03 Wednesday February 21 2001
[Ian]are you back from Oslo yet?

Orangey Bloomers at 15:24:11 Wednesday February 21 2001
I'll have cream with that, Pickles.

Mrs Doyle at 14:58:35 Wednesday February 21 2001
Ronan the Barbarian.....ha ha ha ha ha. Would you like a cup of tea?

Ronan at 14:31:15 Wednesday February 21 2001
Man,this site is becoming more weird everyday!!!
Is it because wer'e in the cup quarters?

Roger Amour at 14:00:21 Wednesday February 21 2001
Just bought a nice pair of trainers. Reebok for Ł54.99.

Gloria Snockers at 13:16:45 Wednesday February 21 2001
I said fuck off, bollocks, you're a cunt.

Markymarks Mum in Scotland at 13:15:05 Wednesday February 21 2001
Oi! you two, get home your dinners on the table.

Markymarks Dad in Kent at 13:08:56 Wednesday February 21 2001
Markymark, you should really check your wording son.However, I agree with you completely. Tottenham do suck and the irons WILL DO IT THIS YEAR.
Markymarks Dad

markymark in London at 12:42:23 Wednesday February 21 2001
Les your talking out your backside. Spurs to win the cup you have got to be JOKING!!! I'll eat my favour shirt if this isn't out CUP THIS YEAR.
Tottenham Sucks.

Big Vern in THE NICK..........but not for long. at 11:59:20 Wednesday February 21 2001
Ello boys an girls, long time no speak. I' bin aht of circulation for a few monffs, keepin a low profile in the remand wing at 'er Majesty's Parkhurst 'otel. What can I say, uvver than the gear in 'ere is good, the food ain't, and the Toms have got meat and two veg! Don't worry though, you're favourite cockney blagger'll be back in action very soon. My brief is the one 'ho got that geezer B.O. Simpson off 'is little legal misunderstandin', so I should be aht of 'ere in a few days. I tell yer wot though, judges are gettin' greedy these days, I' just 'ad to buy a new outboard motah for this beaks effin' ocean-goin' cruiser, to oil the wheels for my unexpected release. So, if anyone knows a little post office wiv a couple of old dears - and no effin' Alsations - be'ind the counter, give us a nod and I can top up the old Costa Del Sol fund...... Good to see that my loverly 'ammers are doin well in the Fa-cup, with just a couple of games to get to the 'allowed turf of Cardiff, and the next one aginst them dirty norf london scumbags, 'ho we'll effin' slaughter, especially wiv my mate Tommy Trigger - The Hoxton Hitman - up on the floodlights wiv is 50 calibre head-ventilator. So, don't be worryin' abaht all this "year endin' in 1" bollocks, cos they aint goin nowhere, capisce????? Anyway, better get on wiv me mailbag sewin', and I gotta get off of the wing's compootah cos Kenny Noye wants to email 'is bookie, and I'd 'ate to top a class A criminal like 'im for the sake of a poxy email. Speak to ya soon, my little 'ammers, look aht for me on Crimewatch! COME ON YOU IRONS!!!!!

Benny Spellman at 11:50:40 Wednesday February 21 2001
I've decided not to splash out ridiculous monmey on a ticket to see the spurts match and watch it on Sky instead. If the prices come down to Ł25 then I'll go but not those prices.

Paul mycock at 10:43:41 Wednesday February 21 2001
"My old man said be a Tottenham fan"............

Ticket Fury at 10:43:18 Wednesday February 21 2001

Hammers fans have condemned the club's decision to charge
Category A prices for the forthcoming FA Cup quarter-final
match with Tottenham.

The supporters have bombarded KUMB with complaints since
the price details were released on Sunday.

Ticket prices (for adults) range from Ł31 in the Bobby Moore Lower to a
whopping Ł45 in the West Upper. To take a family of two adults and two
(non-junior Hammer) children in the West Stand will set you back no less than
Ł139!

As a result our message board has been rife with complaints from angry fans,
like one post which read:

"This is disgraceful, outrageous, naked profiteering on a grand scale."

Those comments were echoed by another fan, who slammed:

"Is this how the club repays the supporters who covered almost 1000 miles for
two away games in the space of a couple of weeks?

"It's not exactly the best way to repay those that made both of those cup ties so
special."

Another said:

"West Ham will be receiving money from Sky to televise this match and they want
to make more profit from the tickets. They want to have their cake and eat it.

"Why was Sunderland's Stadium of Light still not full during the last tie? Because
the match was on Sky and it was cheaper for the home fans to stay at home."

Whatever the argument behind the decision to charge Category A prices for the
game fans have once again been left bitterly disappointed by the club. One
supporter sent a warning when they said:

"If prices don't come down when capacity goes up then I think the club will
deservedly get a nasty shock - i.e. a lot of empty seats in some games next
season."

News at 10:41:20 Wednesday February 21 2001
TIHINEN WANTS TO STAY

Despite Finnish international Hannu Tihinen's admission that he wants to stay
at Upton Park boss Harry Redknapp will still not fork out the Ł3 million asking
price.

Officials from his club Viking Stavanger have held talks with West Ham but
the feeling is that Redknapp is happy with his central defensive options, with
Aussie Hayden Foxe still to come in, and would sooner spend any remaining
cash from the sale of Rio Ferdinand on other areas of the team.

Tihinen, whose situation is being closely monitored by Middlesbrough and
Aston Villa, said: "I think the two clubs have discussed already a couple of
times, so impossible to say what's happened but I hope that I can stay here."

C&B at 09:44:17 Wednesday February 21 2001
Henry: Just asked them what happened in 1971.

Henry P at 09:32:24 Wednesday February 21 2001
This year ending in a 1 crap is beginning to bore the pants off me. Whever a spurts fan goes on about it (while I'm trying not to yawn) it reminds me of the days when they warned sailors that the world was flat and that there be beasties there that will gobble you up, the end of the world is nigh! God, piss off and get a life you sad bastards!

Paolo - still on the night shift at 01:44:29 Wednesday February 21 2001
And ha, ha, ha Wes Brown!!

Paolo - on the night shift at 01:40:37 Wednesday February 21 2001
Bugger me! Reading the Tranmere v Southampton report brought back some painful memories though...

Niki at 00:06:38 Wednesday February 21 2001
Tranmere and Wycome live to fight another round!

Paolo - too %%$ing busy to think! at 19:30:04 Tuesday February 20 2001
But just think how sweet it will be when we knock them out of the cup!!

Dagenham Dave at 17:59:38 Tuesday February 20 2001
Can I join you Dazza...?

Dazza at 17:25:48 Tuesday February 20 2001
that year ending in 1 bollox is really starting to do my head in....if i hear a totts slag say it one more time I think I'll be up on a murder charge!

Dazza at 16:56:33 Tuesday February 20 2001
Nik, wher does the littel totts slag live.. we'll go over and put his windows in!!!!

Black Rod at 16:29:21 Tuesday February 20 2001
In answer to your question[question] i think we would be,William Hague. Small and annoying and nobody likes him/us.

Niki at 16:26:24 Tuesday February 20 2001
Thought you all might like to share a correspondence with my mate Richie the Yiddo......

From: Nicola Golding To: Legg, Richard
Subject: let's av it

COMEONYOUIRRRONSSSSS
-------
From: Legg, Richard To: Nicola Golding
Subject: RE: let's av it

Dear Nik me little Iron grating,

it's nice to know that you still have a sense of humor and I'm looking forward to your comical correspondence...
BUT, I hate to disillusion you because .....the year does in fact end in 1.

I know you've had your little bit of fun in Manchester and on Weir Side, but all good things come to and end because you're mixing with the big boys now !!

Did you know that :-

it was 1901 when Tottenham first got there...........

xxxxxx censored stoopid Sputrz poem xxxxxxxxx

........It's lucky for Spurs when the year ends in 1
they first won the cup when the century begun
it's lucky for Spurs when the year ends in 1
SO THIS IS THE YEAR FOR SPURS !
-------
From: Nicola Golding To: Legg, Richard
Subject: RE: RE: let's av it

Yeah but someone forgot to tell you saddos that the year also has to START WITH 1........

Dream on!
-------

I'm still waiting for a reply!!

Paul Mycock at 16:22:47 Tuesday February 20 2001
I once paid Ł66.40 for a ticket in the west stand behind a pillar.....with the seat missing.....could only see one end.
you lot should stop moaning.If you want to watch cheap football get yourselves over to the Orient[Leyton that is,not the continent]Mind you it's probably a lot cheaper over there.........in my day...........

Question at 16:03:37 Tuesday February 20 2001
If West Ham were a politician, which politician would they be?

Joe at 15:52:25 Tuesday February 20 2001
UHH, they can and they will. And to hear a miserable voice on the end of the phone when you buy a ticket just makes you want to tell them where to get off. I won't be satisfied til they are put up against a wall and shot!

U.H.H at 14:27:54 Tuesday February 20 2001
I've heard it said before that we pay the highest price's in the league,i can't believe that they can get away with price's of Ł42[nick]for a footy match.

William at 14:16:37 Tuesday February 20 2001
I've come to the conclusion that ticket prices CAN be reduced by up to fifty per cent and the clubs could still earn a profit because most fans would put that extra cash they have left over into buying the new away shirt or something. They are just greedy fat cats who should publicly provide quarterly figures of just where all this money is going. In fact I wouldn't object to the Labour Government nationalising the lot of them.

Gary Baldy at 14:05:16 Tuesday February 20 2001
Come to think of it, I dunno about the fans being that loyal. Remember the home leg against FC Jokerit last season? Many fans stayed away due to the price of the tickets.

Duncan at 14:02:50 Tuesday February 20 2001
I'm sure West Ham know that their fans are one of the most loyal in the Premiership and know that this gives them a licence to do just about anything they bloody well like and the supporters will still fork out the necessary doe to watch their beloved team. It stinks and I think warrants a pitch invasion.

Adam at 14:02:03 Tuesday February 20 2001
Just had a look on the Arsenal official site. Their most expensive tickets are only Ł32. I think our most cheapest against Spurs are about the same as that.

Dazza at 13:49:28 Tuesday February 20 2001
Ľ finals of the CL that is

Dazza at 13:48:38 Tuesday February 20 2001
Speakign to a gooner ST holder made me sick.. he told me his ST price and what it includes...
For around Ł520 (cant quite remember the exact figure but it was no more than Ł550)
He gets - 19 PL games, AND 7, yes that is 7 cup games. These include the CL games/UEFA?FA cup and Worthless Cup games too. So far he hasnt had to pay for any cup games this season, and will only have to start paying if they reach the Ľ finals...

Betty Swollocks at 13:34:28 Tuesday February 20 2001
Utopia trip to Sunderland last weekend = Ł199
Arsenal trip to Munich in a couple of weeks = Ł169
Both one day trips , transfers etc etc
Ever been had?

Paolo at 13:07:47 Tuesday February 20 2001
Appropriate as the monika may appear, I can assure you I am not Billy No-Mates!

Pat Mustard at 12:33:08 Tuesday February 20 2001
Jesus it's a bit fekkin' quite on hear!

U.H.H at 11:07:49 Tuesday February 20 2001
Billy no mates sounds like Paolo having a rant!
For me it is getting more expensive to get to games these days.this season so far i have managed 3 games[usually 10 games]the average ticket being Ł35. so after buying 2-3 tickets,petrol/train,food and beer,cheering on the hammers is a costly exercise[mind you i did'nt complain much on boxing day!]
i unfortunatly have not been able to afford a season ticket but would love one..........................Dear Jim....

Billy No-Mates at 09:53:06 Tuesday February 20 2001
One other thing. A so called Footie Pundit in one of the Sunday rags said that it was clubs like Sunderland, Ipswich, Coventry Leicester etc who were preventing the Premiership from unleashing it full potential by selfishly blocking any attempts by the big clubs (ie Manscum, Liverpool, Arse, Chelscum) from breaking away and forming an elite league of clubs and producing matches the fans want to watch. What a selfish prick he is. What gives these clubs the right to think they have a god-given right to dump the rest of the Premiership cos the rest are not worthy to clean their boots. Just watching the Arse-Chelscum game yesterday was enough to show why this should never happen and why when big clubs get their pompous asses kicked by the minnows that makes the current format all the more appealing and exciting. A season of the same old top half a dozen clubs playing each other would be the death of football.

Billy No-Mates at 09:51:58 Tuesday February 20 2001
Well what a day. If any team deserved the FA Cup it has to be us. Twice now we've defied the bookies and TV pundits.
Didn't go to the game but watched it on Sky on my jack. I went ballistic when we scored. The neighbours must have thought I was having a fit or something.
Shame about the empty seats there coz I for one would have gone if I could have got a ticket. But as they were saying on the Sky last night, its an expensive day out now. Going to see two games in a week with your kid(s) and your looking at a few hundred squid at least. Ticket prices should be investigated and the FA should look into it. I mean they want Ł40 squid for the Totscum game and, with West Ham the exception due to the almost fanatical following of the fans, your going to lose fans to the TV. Anyway, I dunno what I'm talking about so I'll stop there. Totts won't be a walkover, but I think they have more to worry about than we have. COME ON YOU IRONS!

C&B at 07:54:52 Tuesday February 20 2001
Who was going on about that "Almost Famous" last week? I saw it last night and it was pretty good.

In fact it was "Crazy"!

Jesus H Christ at 21:14:38 Monday February 19 2001
Sorry Paolo, I cant help you

Paolo at 21:09:57 Monday February 19 2001
38 quid!!!!!

That 19 pints!

Paolo - too %&^$ing busy at work!! at 21:08:40 Monday February 19 2001
According to the official site it's Sky.

And my seat (BMU) is 38 &^%#ing quid!!!!!

Jesus H Christ.

Lenny in Lincolnshire at 18:59:21 Monday February 19 2001
I think the management have spent enough of the Rio dough, well if they are all going to have a divvy up that is ..and Tihinen will not be playing for us any more. if you asume that he is half as good as Rio (my guess is at least that) then he would be worth Ł9m at least but Ł3m must be a bargain for a player that has shown so much potential and commitment to the rest of the team.

Dagenham Dave at 17:12:12 Monday February 19 2001
Now in the sobering light of day I'm not too sure about Totts. This is reminding me of Arse in the Cup a few years back - Pen shoot nightmare... Please boys, do it this time. I'm gonna have so much money riding on this with all the Yids I now. bastards.

Ronan at 16:31:26 Monday February 19 2001
So I take the game IS on sky on the 11 of March...or is it ITV?????
I have to say I was disappointed that Tihinen didn't play but honestly Stimac did do a very good job..thats not to say that the Super Finn wouldn't have handled Quinn.
When is the england team announced?...will we have 3???
After Saturday,psycho should be there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

U.H.H at 15:03:29 Monday February 19 2001
Just announced;Due to sucess of Sky getting the Sunderland game moved to a 12 o'clock kick off.They have decided to show the Totts game at 7.30 am on the indian language channel.......pay per view......Jimmy Hill guest commentator.

Dazza at 14:48:38 Monday February 19 2001
is it?? I'm sure I read it was ITV....oh well

C&B at 14:47:35 Monday February 19 2001
Sky 4pm.

Dazza at 14:19:44 Monday February 19 2001
ITV @ 4pm

Lee H at 13:41:36 Monday February 19 2001
the game in live on sky i think

Nik at 12:34:54 Monday February 19 2001
UHH, no joke. And they aren't the most expensive seats!

U.H.H at 12:26:27 Monday February 19 2001
[Nik]Your jokin'? That's fuckin outrageous.

Dazza at 12:18:52 Monday February 19 2001
Ł31 for me....still daylight robbery.. but we're all mugs and we will all stump up the cash to be there..God knows what the price for final tickets will be at Cardiff!!
Ronan - the game is live on ITV at 4pm sunday 11th march 2001

Nik at 12:14:32 Monday February 19 2001
And it's on the telly.

Niki at 12:13:55 Monday February 19 2001
Ł42 to sit in my own seat for the Totts game. FORTY TWO QUID!!!!!!!

U.H.H at 12:09:00 Monday February 19 2001
Would like to see,
Us beat Totts.
Arse v Pool in semi.
Us v Leicester in semi.
Us v Arse in a real old fashioned london derby final with snot and blood flying everywhere[1980 replayed?] and Paolo lifting the trophy high to a claret and blue roar...........ahhhh if only.

Ronan at 12:08:47 Monday February 19 2001
Totts in the quarters!!!!!!!!!!!....lets be honest it ain't going to be easy!
Haven't heard when the quarters are on...can anyone enlighten me?

C&B at 11:58:07 Monday February 19 2001
I'm no Stimac fan but Harry did the right thing in picking him for Saturday. You need a big strong guy to fight Quinn and Stimac was collosal. I don't think Dailly or Tihinen would have coped.

Jonny at 11:15:07 Monday February 19 2001
News of World yesterday said neither Cole or Carrick would get in squad.

Jonny at 11:14:05 Monday February 19 2001
Great rendition of Joey Cole on Sat - the Spandau 'Gold' song. Franky did well, but although Igor did OK its sad to see Harry working Tihinen out of the team - the club seem reluctant to sign him.
Schemmel or Trev Sinclair?????

Jonny at 11:10:14 Monday February 19 2001
I agree UHH it brings a tear to your eye to finally see a true fan on the pitch - Paolo ran his socks off - proving his worth away from UP. I just love the guy. Come on Kanoute give us a smile(new chant?), Freddy did well, I know he was offside more times than Moncs has been booked, but he was playing on the shoulder and caused them probs all day.
Come on boys don't blow it now. Lets blow the roof off UP against Tottscum, I can't wait!!!!!!!!

C&B at 10:29:58 Monday February 19 2001
Oh and Kris, there is more chance of Stockport winning the Champion's League than Tottscum winning at Upton Park.

C&B at 10:29:22 Monday February 19 2001
Fred should spend the Bradford game watching the Sunderland video and learning when to check his run. With his pace, he has no need to hover so close to the offside line. Stay back a yard and burn the defenders as he did for the goal.

U.H.H at 10:14:28 Monday February 19 2001
[Dazza] i think it's about time Freddy was rested.we have a couple of other people who could probably do with a run out and too many teams are getting wise to the FK/PDC set up.

Kristian in Oslo at 10:02:33 Monday February 19 2001
wooot! That was bloody wonderful again! And Spurs. Almost nothing is as great as the thought of beating them at Upton Park, nothing is a terrifying as the thought of them winning it. It will be scary to watch, if if they are shit and we should win. *shiver*

Dazza at 08:55:20 Monday February 19 2001
Freddie may be missing from saturdays game.. he is one booking away from a ban and if he picks a yellow up at bradford he will miss the totts game.. HR said he may not risk him

U.H.H at 08:37:02 Monday February 19 2001
Semms like i missed all the fun over the weekend. But let me have my five minutes.
Brilliant performance on sat,Stimac was a good choice, the defence looked solid, midfield played well but up front Freddie looked like he was doing Wanchope impression at times[dont get me wrong great goal and worked v.hard]but why not put on Suker? at least for 20-30 minutes.
Sunderland did look poor but we won and that's all that matters.Paolo looked so happy again celebrating after, he really really wants this, as do we all. But know i cant stop having nightmares about that quater final against the Arse 3 years ago.......Tottscum in the next round!a good scalp to take on the way to Cardiff but a lot of hard work still to go [how will we fare in the league]evryone now focussed on the cup run.
"WE'RE ON OUR WAY TO CARDIFF"
[Dazza] i saw Hannibal on Saturday and thought it was a good follow up to SOTL.[an intellegent sequal for a change]

Whoops! at 08:34:21 Monday February 19 2001

C&B at 08:34:05 Monday February 19 2001
Bring on the Totts! An easier 1/4 game we could not have hoped for. Although they beat Stockport 4-0 on Saturday they were very unimpressive against rank opposition. If Kanoute can manage to stay onside, expect us to notch 3 or 4.

That's because Sunderland had no excuses. They were shit.

So are Tottenham and we're as good as in the semis!

DaveiP at 06:00:02 Monday February 19 2001
Very fair (t-i-c) report from Sunderland echo

http://www.sunderland-echo.co.uk/sport/spstory1.html

Fair play to Reidy, he hasn't tried in the least to make excuses. Compare & contrast with Taggart after the last round.

DaveiP at 05:35:48 Monday February 19 2001
I now get stared at when I go to my local!

Most people in my local were either your standard Saturday shoppers, or hoorays waiting for the rugby, not the least bit interested in the real game of the day (apart from the scottish bloke who took my hedged advice and went for 13-2 on Paolo getting the first goal - sorry, mate!).

Having failed to get a ticket for this one, after going to the Theatre of Shite and feeling sick all through the game just by being there, I was especialially p***ed off to see so many empty seats. I've seen reports of 3-11,000 unsold mackem seats ( & 50 WHU seats - what happened?). We could have sold all of those, so why didn't we get a bigger allocation?

That said, the 6,000 of you that did go up deserve a massive round of applause. Apart from the commentary, which for a change was almost pro West Ham, certainly not anti, and referred constantly to dumping the Manc Scum out, you were all we could hear.

When it got to about 55 minutes, there was only going to be one winner, the only question was whether it would be Paolo, Freddie, Frank or someone else that would score the winner. And still the pub stayed quiet.

Until 75 minutes. I went loopy, the pub went quiet, & my nails started praying for their lives. Having been through the same last 15 minutes at Old Trafford, I can say it don't get any easier watching on tv. And goodbye fingernails, that had only just recovered from Jan 28.

Twenty seconds from the final whistle, the (Barnsley) manager of the place says "happy now, Dave?". Yeah right like I could speak coherently enough to answer. Final whistle went, I went predictably loopy again, then about two minutes later turn round and say "Yeah. Now, I'm happy". More screams.

By this time there's a few more Chelsea fans in there (very chelsea area), and most of them are giving congrats, but saying they hope they avoid us next round. Sorry boys, but the Arse made that choice for you.

Now i'm going through Spirit of Radio, Tom Sawyer & Victor, reading all the reaction & you know what?

If they doubt us - F***'em! Am I still pissed? Too right. See y'all March 10th, our place, right?

Come On You Irons !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DiP

DaveiP at 02:18:20 Monday February 19 2001
I have to say (bloody hell, three in a row, must be a five year record for me!) that I thought that Frank was fantastic yesterday. I've always been one of his supporters, but his passing yesterday was sublime, and the way he beat three of them before laying off a slide-rule pass for Freddie's goal was a joy to behold. Keep that three together, & there's the heart of the England midfield for years to come.

Dave iP at 01:59:48 Monday February 19 2001
That last was from me. My cut & paste has gone arse up'rds

Paolo at 01:58:20 Monday February 19 2001
Paolo: Re: your post @ 19:52:54. I don't think that just cos we've got a home game, it's foregone conclusion. In fact, I'd rather have had Tranmere @ Prenton Park, than what we've got.

Still, if we can knock that year ends in one grin off their faces, who am I to complain :o)

Nik, I said we should have gone!! Oh yeah, to all others of us who were left behind, how gutting was it to see all those empty space, knowing we could have filled 12,000? Never mind, you 6,000 - you did us proud - we couldn't hear the mackems!

Roll on totts!!!

Adam at 23:00:30 Sunday February 18 2001
Mixed Feeling about the draw. They are the easiest Premiership team remaining and if we play like we have done already in the cup, WE WILL WIN.
However I will not be there, as I am away in Rome for that weekend.
Does anyone know of any bars in Rome that will be guarenteed to show the match?

Paolo at 22:50:52 Sunday February 18 2001
Thank god for that! I've been sitting here for ages trying to work out what you were on about!!

Dazza at 21:50:13 Sunday February 18 2001
that should be 'easier than the totts'

Dazza at 21:45:31 Sunday February 18 2001
can you honestly say away to the mickey mousers, or arse is harder than totts @ home?? I dont think so.. it would have been nice if they were drawn together, but hopefully they will in the semis, i think we'll get to the semi's... and depending if the semi final draw is kind to us we'll be having a weekend in Cardiff

Paolo at 20:45:44 Sunday February 18 2001
Greetings Dazza, I was beginning to think I was talking to myself (again!).

I've been doing a bit more thinking about the draw, and I'm begining to get a bit pissed off. At first I was so pleased we were at home and had missed Arse and Liverpool, that I thought we'd finally got a bit of FAC luck. But now, looking at the way the draw came out, we've actually got the hardest draw of the round!! If we get to Cardiff, no one will be able to say we haven't earned it.

Another thought - the club could really prove what it's made off if it allowed all those who went to the away games, and who aren't season ticket or bond holders, to have first chance of tickets for the Spurs game. Otherwise there's going to be quite a few who went all the way to OT and Sunderland and did their bit towards our victories, but who won't be able to get in to see the Spurs game.

Dazza at 19:56:32 Sunday February 18 2001
I have just visied a spurs chat site (i will reformat my HD after going to such a shithole)
the general response from the scumbags is that they will draw at UP and turn us over 3-1 at Shite Fart Lane...who are they kidding.. they aint gonna get a 2nd chance.. 2-0 to us, semi's he we come

Paolo at 19:52:54 Sunday February 18 2001
One thing we've got to do though is not start believeing for one second that our name is on the cup. Spur's belief that it's theirs because there's a 1 in the year is their biggest handicap. We have got to use our progress so far to make us really WANT the cup, but we've got to stay believing we're the underdogs - that's our strength.

If we go into the Spurs game thinking it's our's because we're at home, and it's only Spurs, and it's our year, then we all know what the result will be. We've got to be hungry and determined, not for one minute taking anything for granted. We've got to fight every inch of the way.

Let's hope that Psycho is seeing this as his last ever chance of getting to an FA Cup final, and DiCanio as his first chance in years for a medal, and our only chance this year of getting into Europe, and that they can make the others just as hungry. We've got to really want that cup and we've got to believe we can get it, but at the same time we've got to know that it isn't ours by right and that we've got to fight every inch of the way.

But won't it be just fan-bloody-fuckin-tastic to see those Spurs supporters' faces when they lose at UP and realise that the fact that there's a 1 in the year means sweet FA?!

Paolo at 19:38:59 Sunday February 18 2001
The rest of the draw, just in case anyone missed it:

Southampton or Tranmere v Liverpool
Leicester v Wimbledon or Wycombe
Arsenal v Blackburn or Bolton

So it could have been just a little kinder to us - maybe home against W or W, and Arse v Liverpool would have been good. But no real complaints!

Looking at that draw, you've got to fancy Leicester, but Southampton at home is never an easy one, and Arse could find they've got their hands full. And even Leicester could have problems with Wimbledon. But, if it all goes as we would expect (and we beat Spurs, of course!), then we've got to hope for Leicester in the semis. Cup form or not, I don't want to face Arse or Liverpool until we absolutely have to!

Paolo at 18:05:05 Sunday February 18 2001
Spurs at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is a god after all!!!!

Dazza at 18:04:56 Sunday February 18 2001
yeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssss
totts at home

Paolo` at 17:13:22 Sunday February 18 2001
3-1. Ah well, Liverpool it is then.

Paolo going YESSS! at 16:32:29 Sunday February 18 2001
City have scored!!! Go on you little Manc beauties!

Never thought I'd hear myself say that.

Calm, calm, calm.

Paolo - having a VERY lazy Sunday at 16:15:50 Sunday February 18 2001
In fact I only just got up! Hammers fans popping up everywhere last night - brilliant!

The Wombles, home or away for the next round. I think, Spurs or Leicester in the semis. Then Liverpool in the Final - that way I think we get into Europe, win or lose, as they are bound to win the Worthless.

Fuck me - just switched on the radio and Liverpool are 2 up after only 12 minutes! Definitely don't want to run into them until the Final.

So that's it then - Liverpool away in the next round!!!

Dagenham Dave at 16:01:34 Sunday February 18 2001
Ok.... that wasn't a bad second half. But you know wot I mean.... so rigid, tight, boring, gutless shite innit. Special mention to D. Wise ... ha fucking ha.

Dagenham Dave bored shitless watching the Arse-Chels crap at 15:39:52 Sunday February 18 2001
You never see an open entertaining ganme at Arsenal do ya...?

Dagenham Dave at 15:38:25 Sunday February 18 2001
Having never seen West Ham at Wembley it would be bloody typical if we'd got to a final this year.... especially now that the bulldozers have been delayed and Wembley is just sat there......

Dagenham Dave at 15:14:08 Sunday February 18 2001
Cheers Geordie. Not long to the draw now boys ...... Bring on those Yids!!!

Dave Patto at 14:02:05 Sunday February 18 2001
Alf, Well done ,I never thought I'd be saying that to a bunch of Cockneys, but any team that can sicken the Mackems is Ok by me!

Hope you had a good day out in the north-east,like any true Black and White I'm feeling almost as happy as you lot.Hope you reach the final, after last year's crap it would be nice to see some football.

Cheers!
Dave Patto
Darlington Mags.

Dazza at 13:22:11 Sunday February 18 2001
Nik, it was me, gumbo and his mates and Sukhfrom letchworth, we did have the 'nidge hammers flag (as seen in this months hammers news)
a lot of the nidge boys couldnt make this one though

Niki at 13:15:07 Sunday February 18 2001
Allo Steve! Nice to have you back!

Niki at 13:14:28 Sunday February 18 2001
Dazza, GOOD BOY! Did you go with the Nidge Hammers?

Postman Steve in his brother's bedroom at 13:14:06 Sunday February 18 2001
Lomg time no speak. Just dropped by to say YEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! Sorry about that. Alright Griff?

Dazza at 12:59:02 Sunday February 18 2001
Great day, great result, nice Stadium, and the mackems are pretty decent fans (well those that decided to turn up)
I was slating HR for dropping Tihinen but I must say HR got it spot on, Stimac was a rock in the defence and Pearce took Quinn out of the game, which effectively took Phillips out too, as without quinn phillips is nothing.
Sunderland were piss poor, they play the long ball game a la wimbledon, no skill at all.
If only Freddie had his shooting boots on from the first minute it would have been all over after 20 minutes.

I would love the Wombles away i nteh next round and take 15000 hammers t oSelhurst park and turn it into a home game for us..but I honestly reckon we'll get Liverpool, arse, or chelsea away....
Cardiff he we come!!

Adam at 11:18:23 Sunday February 18 2001
Brilliant!!!!!!!

wish i went. Plus I am in Rome for the Quarter Finals. Dont want to get Tottenham as I want them in the final.

On Stimac, I groaned when he started but he handled Quinn superbly, and after seeing how we dealt with Quinn at UP the other week, I have to concede his selection was correct.

Niki in Limehouse at 10:53:16 Sunday February 18 2001
THANK YOU WEST HAM! I love you I do.

Morning all. Mike the Hammer and all the travelling Irons - well bloody done. I'm gonna make sure I get in the queue early for the next round tickets. Can't risk missing another one. In answer to your questions, I was drinking in a pub called The Oaks in Grays, Essex. Three monster screens and packed with Hammers. You could hear the travelling supporters singing Bubbles etc. loud and clear. Superb. There I am biting my nails, saying we've just got to keep it nil-nil til 70 minutes and we can do it again, and flippin' eck we only went and DID IT. The place erupted. Great stuff, but I wished I was there.

Dare we speculate that our name's on the cup? Exciting innit?

Michelle Williams in Swinton, Manchester at 09:14:06 Sunday February 18 2001
Please can anyone help me. I'm looking for my dad, who I haven't seen since I was 3 years old. I know that he was an avid West Ham supporter and I'm hoping that he, or somebody who knows him will see this. His full name is Raymond Paul Williams, date of birth 7th or 8th of August 1950. He was last known to be living somewhere in Sheffield, about 16 years ago, but is originally from London.

I can be contacted at michelle.t.williams@virginnet.co.uk"

Paolo - on the night shift at 02:09:47 Sunday February 18 2001
Is that it??? Only one of you lucky bastards sober enough to post anything on here?!!!!

Mike the f*ckinh Happy Hammer,enjoy in g the victory at 21:05:02 Saturday February 17 2001
YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You beauties!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just got back.
Top trip,great stadium,blinding result,lets have a trip to the totts in the quarters!

Paolo at 20:25:34 Saturday February 17 2001
Ronan - at one point he was about to be brought on as a sub, so presumably he's OK. I don't know what happened there - the cameras showed Tihinen getting ready to come on about 5 minutes from the end, and the 4th official apparently getting his board ready, but nothing happened. Maybe the shock of almost using a sub when he didn't have to was too much for Harry?!

dave patto in newcastle at 19:48:14 Saturday February 17 2001

Ronan at 19:27:02 Saturday February 17 2001
Paolo: Was super Finn injured?...I agree with you he would have been a bit more stable than Stimac who gave me a few heart attacks!!!
After all the stick,FLJ proved he is class,an absolutley fantastic player,and while Carrick went missing for a while,he controlled the middle,and snuffed out all the supply to the two front men...well impressive!!!
JC was good as was DI Canio,and then Kanoute...he had to score at some stage
Im getting drunk tonight....anyone share my enthusiasm??

Dave Patto in Newcastle at 18:01:20 Saturday February 17 2001
Well done ,even for a bunch of cockneys! Can't wait to hear the excuses from those Mackem bastards.Enjoy your week-end.As a black and white I'm as happy as you lot!

Ronan at 17:42:28 Saturday February 17 2001
YEEESSSSSS!!!!!!
I LOVE WEST HAM UNITED!!!!!!!!!

Paolo at 17:04:47 Saturday February 17 2001
DD - I thought the same thing - weird isn't it? You think he'd at least smile!

Dagenham Dave at 16:18:52 Saturday February 17 2001
We must sign Schemmel. We must sign Tihinen. We must offer Di Canio freedom of East London. I wish freddie would do something when he scores ....i was jumping around like a madman and glanced back at the TV and he was just stood there looking miserable ... I thought for a second that it had been disallowed. What is it with the French eh...?

Dagenham Dave at 16:11:17 Saturday February 17 2001
Ha Ha !!! Oh yeah ...Ginola's a wanker ...forgot about that!

Good Article on Frank from Today's Guardian... at 16:09:41 Saturday February 17 2001
http://football.guardian.co.uk/News_Story/0,1563,439190,00.html

Paolo again! at 16:03:54 Saturday February 17 2001
Apparently Freddies goal was at exactly the same time at DiCanio's at OT. Spooky or what?

Paolo at 15:57:39 Saturday February 17 2001
DD - the main difference between PDC and Ginola is that PDC is a football god and Ginola is a wanker.

Paolo at 15:56:01 Saturday February 17 2001
And I wonder how many text messages saying "Yessss!" were sent at about 3:25?!

One little niggle - what was Stimac doing back in the side?? Surely Tihinen has proved himself enough for Stimac not to be able to just walk back into the side the minute he's fit? I'd have felt a lot safer with Super Finn at the back.

And here's a handy tip - don't go clothes shopping after watching West Ham win a cup game in the pub. I popped into Next just to get a cheap white shirt for work and half an hour later I'd spend 170 quid!!!!

Paolo at 15:51:36 Saturday February 17 2001
Well I always said Freddie couldn't score and Psycho was past it!

Fuck me, we didn't just win it, we dominated!! My bad feeling went the minute I walked in the pub and saw how we were playing.

DD's right about Lampard, he had a magnificent game, but I hardly noticed Carrick - but that could have been down to the crap TV pictures, with half the ground in shade and half in sunshine it was hard to tell who was who most of the time.

Apart from that 15 mins in the second half, Sunderland played like a team who knew they'd already lost. And there were empty seats, for God's sake. A place that prides itself on being fanatical about football, and a 5th round tie at home against a team they beat 2-0 away a few weeks ago, and they can't sell all the seats!!!

And well done to the 6,000, we could hear you loud and clear.

Who do we fancy for the next round? I reckon we could take on anyone at the moment, but I'd still like to avoid the remaining big teams until the semis at least. But just a draw at home would be nice!

Dagenham Dave at 14:51:50 Saturday February 17 2001
Psycho was magnificant today. Paulo worked very hard (that's the main difference between him and Ginola) Stmac was strong and he had to be! But I wanna give special mention to FLJ He was superb in there ...showed Carrick a few things too. Quality. Boys, Im very f*cking proud

Dagenham Dave at 14:41:04 Saturday February 17 2001
I've opened the Jack Daniels and put away the funny fags (for a short time anyway!) Off to watch Chas 'n Dave tomorrow night ...Hope Stockport turn those Yids over ....I'll be giving the big one to the bearded duo

Dag Dave at 14:33:59 Saturday February 17 2001
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Dagenham Dave logging in from Heaven at 14:32:08 Saturday February 17 2001
at half time I knew we wearnt gonna lose ....COME ON!!!!!! iM FUCKING DELIGHTED .... tHE FANS WERE MAGIC AGAIN ...LOUD AS F*CK ...SORRY Paulo!

Dagenham Dave at 14:29:40 Saturday February 17 2001
YESSSSSSS YOU FUCKING BEAUTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Paolo - just crawled out of bed at 10:11:12 Saturday February 17 2001
Less than two hours to go - starting to get very nervous!

Anyone else up and about?

Michelle Williams in Swinton, Manchester at 09:03:33 Saturday February 17 2001
Please can anyone help me. I'm looking for my dad, who I haven't seen since I was 3 years old. I know that he was an avid West Ham supporter and I'm hoping that he, or somebody who knows him will see this. His full name is Raymond Paul Williams, date of birth 7th or 8th of August 1950. He was last known to be living somewhere in Sheffield, about 16 years ago, but is originally from London.

I can be contacted at michelle.t.williams@virginnet.co.uk

Mike the Hammer at 02:50:42 Saturday February 17 2001
Well,time to sort myself out,and get ready!!!
Speak to you soon,and see some of you sooner!
COOOOOOOOOOMMMMMEEEEME OOOOOOOOON YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUU IIIIIIIIIIRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mike the Hammer at 02:33:39 Saturday February 17 2001
Daz,but I bet as soon as you get on the coach,you will fall asleep!

Paolo - feeling sleepy at 02:32:03 Saturday February 17 2001
and just about to crawl into my nice cozy, warm bed....

Dazza at 02:20:18 Saturday February 17 2001
this no sleep thing is a piece of piss...its the middle of the night and I dont feel one little bit sleepy

Paolo - still on the bloody night shift at 02:09:51 Saturday February 17 2001
My PC just died as well!! That's only supposed to happen at work!

Good luck chaps, and any other Alfies going to the game. I shall be thinking of you as I get up about 11am, and walk all of 5 mins to the pub....

Dazza at 02:05:31 Saturday February 17 2001
Mike - me missus reda hannibal and said it was slow going.. the film is quite different to the book...ray liota has a nice flip top head at the end

Dazza at 02:04:36 Saturday February 17 2001
couldnt be arsed with CS......not long to go now... meetng me mate in 40 mins

Mike the Hammer at 01:51:41 Saturday February 17 2001
OK Daz,see you at UP maybe!
I've got me shades....

Mike the Hammer at 01:51:12 Saturday February 17 2001
:o))

Dazza at 01:50:56 Saturday February 17 2001
im off to play counter strike for a bit see yer laters chaps

Mike the Hammer. at 01:49:56 Saturday February 17 2001
Daz,I read both books,and preferred S.O.T.L as well...

Dazza at 01:49:37 Saturday February 17 2001
is that what you call her???

Mike the Hammer at 01:48:54 Saturday February 17 2001
Back again....my pc went down Daz...

Dazza at 01:45:48 Saturday February 17 2001
i think mike's fallen asleep

Dazza at 01:45:23 Saturday February 17 2001
Dunno how we'll do to be honest, if we judge our expectations on the last 2 games we're on course for one hell of a beating. BUT it is the FA cup, they have a few players out, and we are West Ham......Anything could happen

Paolo - on the night shift still at 01:39:46 Saturday February 17 2001
No, couldn't face that coach journey twice in one day, and couldn't get to UP for that time in the morning anyway.

Just come back in from Chicago Rock, and I've realised where they got the inspiration for 'Who let the dogs out?' from! It was DIRE.

You should have tried Almost Famous - a MUCH better film. Go and see it, you won't regret it.

How do you feel about tomorrow? (today!!) I'm not feeling as bad as I was about our chances, but I'm still not feeling good.

Dazza at 01:27:44 Saturday February 17 2001
Paolo.. r u going to mackemland later on this morning??

Dazza at 01:11:37 Saturday February 17 2001
mike, are you wearing yer shades tomorrow??

Dazza at 01:10:23 Saturday February 17 2001
ello chaps... i was beginning to think you had fallen asleep mike....
I have just seen Hannibal and that is enough to send yuo t osleep, a real shite film and not a patch on S.O.T.L

Paolo - on the night shift at 01:02:18 Saturday February 17 2001
Nice to have some company on the night shift for a change!

Mike the Hammer at 01:00:10 Saturday February 17 2001
Daz....over here......

Dazza at 00:30:23 Saturday February 17 2001
MTH r u out there?

Mike the Hammer,still not sleep in g at 21:08:31 Friday February 16 2001
If
If you can keep your loyalty when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can support West Ham when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait for that Cup Final and not be tired by waiting,
Or, sit at home and watch the grand occasion, longing for our day,
Whilst being knocked out by Torquay, or someone as humiliating,
And yet still go to work, and to the next game away;

If you can dream - and watch those dreams fade and die;
If you can hope – and you hope you can win the game;
If you can meet Man U on ITV or SKY
And treat those two TV channels just the same;
If you can bear to hear the crap that’s spoken,
Twisted by pundits to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the team you give your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can’t make sense of H ,no rhyme or reason,
Who risks it on a Di Canio turn and cross,
And lose, and start again the following season
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To shout and cheer your team though they don’t give a damn,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says "Come on West Ham”;

If you can go to pre season friendlies and keep your virtue,
Or play in Europe- nor lose the common touch;
If Chelsea, Spurs Arsenal nor Man U can hurt you;
If your fans stand with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving 90 minutes
With five thousand four hundred seconds shouting done-
Yours is the Cup and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be West Ham my son!

Bazbubbles all claret and blue in Clacton-on-Sea moaning cause I an'it going any one got a kleenxe at 20:01:17 Friday February 16 2001
Good luck to all those going tomorrow have a really safe journey, we set the standard at Manchester, now it is your turn make it a sea in claret and blue, sing better that we did at the Mancs, get right behind the team 200% is the standard, think of us all we are the greatest football club in the world with the worlds greatest supporters the family of IRONS. dO NOT FORGET US LEFT BEHIND, so do it tomorrow

COME ON YOU IRONS

Ian in Bozeat at 19:21:56 Friday February 16 2001
UHH: so dare you risk telling me where you're moving into?

Kev at 16:48:22 Friday February 16 2001
I like custard creams.

U.H.H at 16:12:51 Friday February 16 2001
[MtH]Nellie?

Mike the Hammer at 15:52:57 Friday February 16 2001
U.H.H.Now you're having a giraffe! Course I know!
Another nick in the long line of splendid nicks....Psycho,Stretch,Reggie,Tonka,Bonzo,Georgie,Wally,Nellie,Biffa,Mad Dog...........

U.H.H at 15:50:20 Friday February 16 2001
Where's the all knowing Paolo been today?

Dazza at 15:49:58 Friday February 16 2001
UHH - i didnt know I was going to the SOL until 4pm yesterday, so I vavent had that much time to go on about it!!

U.H.H at 15:39:54 Friday February 16 2001
[MtH]Dont worry i understood the 'SCOOBY' reference. did you know who i mean by Shaggy?

U.H.H at 15:36:08 Friday February 16 2001
[Ian] have a good trip, looking to move in on the 1st april by the way.

Ian in Northampton at 15:19:18 Friday February 16 2001
Off to Oslo Monday/Tuesday. Further fascinating insights into Northamptonshire village life on Wednesday. Betcha can't wait.

Ian in Northampton at 15:16:22 Friday February 16 2001
MtH: sorry, that passed me by - if I'd have been a bit quicker on the uptake, I'd have laughed. No, p*ss is not a banned word for me.
C&B: er....
If anyone is really, desperately short of something to do, F365 have an audio interview with H. Only interesting thing - in among the usual H platitudes about how it was really pretty good to only get beat by Liverpool 3-0 'because they beat everyone at home' and drawing at home against Spurs was a good result because they've had good away wins at Charlton and Man City (I'm not making this up) and drawing at home with Coventry was good given that most of the lads had never met each other let alone played with each other (?) (Never let me defend H again against accusations that perhaps he sets his sights a little bit low...) - anyway, where was I? Oh yes, a reference in the interview to a game at Roker Park in 1967 when we won 5-1: Hurst (2), Moore, Peters and, apparently, a 30-yard screamer by a young Harry Redknapp. Ah, them were't days....

Mike the Hammer at 15:01:53 Friday February 16 2001
Scooby was a weak attempt at humour in response to the 'Shaggy' reference...
I didn't want to say taking the p*iss in case p*iss was a banned word for you...

C&B at 15:00:09 Friday February 16 2001
Yes. What's the town in Cockney Rhyming Slang?

Tea Cosy Hat?

Ian in Northampton at 14:56:24 Friday February 16 2001
c&B: funny you should mention Bozeat - it came up in passing in a conversation with UHH. Is there anything you'd like to know about the village?

C&B at 14:49:31 Friday February 16 2001
Is there a lot of rhyming slang up Bozeat way?

Mike the Hammer at 14:44:17 Friday February 16 2001
Sorry C&B...too excited!
Del is going as well,at least he'd better be,coz I aint driving round to his house at 3:45am for nuffin'........

Ian in Northampton at 14:44:15 Friday February 16 2001
MtH: I take it you subscribe to the "Alan Hudson School Of Cockney Rhyming Slang" (see F365 passim...) Scooby? Giraffe?? I don't think so...

Gazza at 14:42:42 Friday February 16 2001
Bring back the hoops thats what I say. And while we're about it bring back Farrahs, Lois jeans, ska, space invaders, box jackets, Pringle jumpers, the rubik cube and chopper bikes!!

in at 14:40:36 Friday February 16 2001

at 14:40:17 Friday February 16 2001
http://www.timeanddate.com/counters/customcounter.html?day=17&month=02&year=2001&hour=12&min=00

C&B at 14:35:12 Friday February 16 2001
Michael: I said "who" not "what"!!!!

Bob the Builder (really) at 14:33:29 Friday February 16 2001
Before I forget...'Niki, where are you drinking before the game?'...goodnight folks.

MIke the Hammer at 14:32:28 Friday February 16 2001
C&B,something about some sort of Cup tie thingy that is taking place tomorrow,necessitating the requirement of getting up facking early,and making plenty of sarnies for journey to view aforementioned Cup tie and the return.
U.H.H. Cheers,and I never do!

U.H.H at 14:23:38 Friday February 16 2001
I wish you jammy fucker's with ticket's for tomorrow would stop going on about it!
Sorry dont mean it. Mike and Dazza enjoy your sarnie's and dont drink the local water.

C&B at 14:19:21 Friday February 16 2001
Who's going on here? Nik? Dazualdo? Michael?

Mike the Hammer at 14:14:25 Friday February 16 2001
Daz,I'm now going for the shopping at Sainsbury's,make the sarnies,get some kip,wake up around midnight,but I may well be far too excited,and stay up without sleep anyway!
Speak to you online....
Ian,please tell me you're having a giraffe about THE away kit? From late 60's to early 70's,and is the finest away kit we have ever had.(yes,even better than the white one we won the '80 Cup Final in.)

U.H.H at 13:59:29 Friday February 16 2001
I like the kit's Fila have come up with,i mean before who did we have 'buckta'[?] Pony[and trap].
At least Fila manage to sneak the little Hammer motif on as well,[Jessie]there have been quite a few teams recently who have let the fans decide the strip[Sunderland]most recently.
I heard a rumour[on here i think]that they might be considering using the old 70's away design with the hoop's on the next strip.[can anyone back this up?].

Ned at 13:51:37 Friday February 16 2001
COME ON YOU IRRRRROOOOONNNNNSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!...its getting awfully close folks!!!!

Ian in Northampton at 13:51:10 Friday February 16 2001
Who remembers the all light blue with the two claret hoops? When on earth was that? I always hated it.

Jonny at 13:42:09 Friday February 16 2001
Yeah Norm, we know we play in C&B - but we have to have an away kit. I think it's alright, at least it doesn't have lots of flashy tacky bits on it. I have to admit it though - we never quite get it right. Minimalist and classy would be good. I don't like the home light blue bits - they should be on the whole sleeve.

Norman at 13:17:01 Friday February 16 2001
Am I the only one here who does not like the new navy blue away kit? It doesn't say West Ham to me...more like poncey, mamby pamby stuff. Claret and blue son, claret and blue are the colours.

Jessie at 13:12:18 Friday February 16 2001
I like the idea of letting the fans choose the style of the next home/away kit like wot Southamton have done. I'm sure Fila can sort somefing out. I would like to see Fila have a go at that old 70's away style of the blue shirt with the two claret hoops around the middle. A variation on that theme would be nice. As mush as I hate Manscum and Tottscum, when it comes to Liverpool I wouldn't mind seeing them do well in Europe. So it was good to see them do an Italian Job on Roma last night. Love & Kisses XXXXX

Jonny at 12:53:05 Friday February 16 2001
Cheers for the positives Mack, 2-0 West Ham , same as the Roma snatch and grab last night.

Dazza at 12:03:53 Friday February 16 2001
MTH - I have opted for the stay up all night and get some kip on the coach option..
I'll be online until about 2.30 tonight so if yer about let me know.. if no one is about I'll probably be playing Counter Strike for a few hours, along with a 4 pack of red bull that should keep me up

Father Jack at 11:54:59 Friday February 16 2001
FECK!

Mike the Hammer at 10:03:51 Friday February 16 2001
Haven't got a Scooby U.H.H...

U.H.H at 09:52:08 Friday February 16 2001
How long before Shaggy is match fit?

U.H.H at 09:42:45 Friday February 16 2001
Personnel for tomorrow? Suker up front with Paolo and give Raggy or Toddy a run out.
Leave Song,Lamps and Camara on the coach.

Mike the Hammer at 09:39:35 Friday February 16 2001
Morning Del.
Have to agree on the itchiest kit mate.

U.H.H at 09:35:40 Friday February 16 2001
Oh Brother that was it. the only problem with this site is we all are starting to show our age.

Ian in Northampton at 09:27:00 Friday February 16 2001
UHH: 'All Gas and Gaiters' is the only one I remember. Oh, and 'Oh Brother'. Now there aren't many people on this ite who would have seen those.... I guess he made a profession out of playing clerical roles...

U.H.H at 09:22:56 Friday February 16 2001
Oh yeah, and that fuckin' awful beige away kit.
Thank god for FILA.

U.H.H at 09:21:12 Friday February 16 2001
I have still got the home shirt from 88/89, look's a bit battered but i always prefer the kits with no collars.what season was the one with the big PONY tick across the front? then after that they did that awful thing with the flappy collars.
[Ian]do you remember that program he used to be in?[Nimmo].

Del at 09:13:25 Friday February 16 2001
That 1977/78 chevron kit was the itchiest West Ham have ever produced it also the starting point in the theory of crap shirt = relegation. See the Mike Small/Mitchell Thomas 1991/2 kit and the 1988/9 Bye Bye Mr Johnny Lyall kit.

Mike the Hammer at 08:54:11 Friday February 16 2001
I think you're confusing him with a Rothmans....

C&B at 08:45:57 Friday February 16 2001
Wasn't Nimmo a fag?

Ian in Northampton at 08:41:52 Friday February 16 2001
UHH: yeah, let's. You know, just a mile up the road from Bozeat is Easton Maudit. Derek Nimmo used to live there - but isn't he dead now?

U.H.H at 08:10:27 Friday February 16 2001
Morning all, roughly 24hours to go and i still dont feel confident. but.....deep down i know we will win! hopefully in the same spectular way as OT with a Paolo wonder goal.
1-0 sounds good.
[Ian]shall we talk about villages or b-roads just to piss this lot off?

Mike the Hammer at 07:38:10 Friday February 16 2001
AndyinOttawa,where abouts there mate?
You will find yourself having a fellow Hammer there at some stage this year....

Mack at 07:31:06 Friday February 16 2001
We have a GREAT chance of another victory on Saturday , Sunderland have 5 first team regulars out ,my mole in the North East reckons they will play a very negative game and try and snatch a goal on the break , no change there then.Strangely, the vibes coming from the Sunderland fans I work with is that they have seen West Ham turn over the Mancs and fear the mighty Claret and Blue doing the same to them on their home turf.

Paolo - on the night shift at 01:22:49 Friday February 16 2001
A Dave called Ian, eh? You're right, you have got to stop smoking that stuff!

Have you tried that company that sells old replica shirts? Can't remember their name at the mo, but I'm sure someone on here knows what I'm talking about. They used to advertise in WSC (probably still do, but I haven't seen WSC for years).

I've got one of their old WHU shirts (30s or 50s? can't remember), but it's made of heavy cotton, and it's horrible to wear. Hard to believe they played in those things.

Just checked the label in my shirt, and they're called TOFFS - The Old Fashioned Football Shirt Company.

Dagenham Dave at 19:09:06 Thursday February 15 2001
Hey paulo ...you must have connections..... Do you know where I could get one from. I love that shirt. I need that shirt. Now ....I need a spliff ..... Laters

Dagenham Dave at 18:52:08 Thursday February 15 2001
Christ my typing sucks! Anyone know where I could get my hands on one...? Email me at ianhall10@yahoo.com Many Thanks. the "10" is my shirt number a la Mr Brooking... sad or wot!

Nik at 18:51:28 Thursday February 15 2001
Daz, dun it. Ah that feels better doesn't it? :)

Dagenham Dave at 18:50:09 Thursday February 15 2001
Right. Let's get serious. I'm after the West Ham home shire from season 1976-77 or 77-78 season ... (I think!) Its Claret at the bottom and a blue top hald that goes into a point. Anyone wanna got one for sale? Will pay good price.

Dagenham Dave at 18:48:22 Thursday February 15 2001
Gotta stop smoking that shit. There's a lesson there for us all.

Dagenham Dave at 18:47:41 Thursday February 15 2001
Feeling better now..... Shit! Just seen what I wrote!!

Dazza at 18:46:24 Thursday February 15 2001
i'll sort it tonight nik if yer aint already done it

Niki at 18:17:02 Thursday February 15 2001
You know you're neglecting your web-site when......... Alf's Moans Page is 401kb and is too big to load in your browser. It's just like the old days! Come back R J Dawkins all is forgiven.

Andyinottawa at 17:57:56 Thursday February 15 2001
Adam: New River Crescent, N13. Probably changed to Middle Aged River Crescent by now, since the "River" was new in 1613. I can't tell Ian or UHH where that is in relation to Milton Keynes, cos MK hadn't been invented when I still lived in the UK.

Paolo at 17:48:22 Thursday February 15 2001
Vic the Gooner - he of the famed moustache!

I just wrote a posting all about Saturday, but it hasn't appeared!!!! But the gist of it was I had a good feeling before the ManU game, and I haven't got it this time.

Not looking forward to Saturday at all. But please, please, PLEASE let me be wrong.

U.H.H at 17:21:01 Thursday February 15 2001
As a new bod i dont know who VtG is?

U.H.H at 17:18:00 Thursday February 15 2001
I agree with Vince and Ronan,not feeling good about Saturday at all.The last 3 performances have done nothing to follow on from the OT victory. But, if anything we could pinch it 1-0.

Paolo at 17:00:17 Thursday February 15 2001
Blimey - too busy to get on Alf's all afternoon, and when I do I'm being accused of doing nothing all day!! Just how long does Ronan think it takes to post something on Alf's?!

Vince - because we know where she'll be drinking before the game!

Andyinottawa - nice to hear from you again. I wonder how many of the old 'regulars' are still out there, just reading? VtG might even still be around!

Dazza at 16:55:25 Thursday February 15 2001
Niki.. are you going on saturday, if so wher are you drinking before the game ??? :o)

Adam at 16:43:03 Thursday February 15 2001
Nice one andy, which road did you live in Palmers Green? And was it a suburb of Athens in those days?

jonny at 16:08:13 Thursday February 15 2001
I fear too Vince but if we can't even hope or dream about winning something then my life becomes even shitter.

Dazza at 16:05:30 Thursday February 15 2001
Mike... me and my mate Mr Red Bull will be in full effect on Friday night.. going to see hannibal, should get in around 11.30... stay up 'til 3.. meet me mate in Letchworth and get a lift to UP, only for the coaches to drive straight past my house on the way up the A1 around 6am.. shame the bastards wont stop at J9 of the A1..oh well its free so what do I care...

Ronan at 16:01:19 Thursday February 15 2001
Hi all,it has taken a while to read everyones postings since the last time I entered this sacred site but I got there!!!
Well paolo still commands this site....Do you do ANYTHING???
looking forward to saturday...apprehensively!,I hope we can get a result,it would be fantastic...and we could try and forget about our ridiculous position in the league table!!
If we win,is 'arry a God again??
some very fickle fans on this site!!

Vince in Beckton at 16:00:32 Thursday February 15 2001
I'm preparing myself for a 4-0 wolloping saturday. We won't have chance. Alright you may say thats what they said when we drew Manscum. But the past couple of results have cast a shadow over our momentus victory. I'm beginning to think our victory was a fluke and that we caught scum on a bad day as opposed to us being an improved side. I hope I'm wrong, but I have a bad feeling about this one...like I did when we drew Manscum. I dunno. Why hasn't anyone asked where Niki will be drinking before the game yet?

Andyinottawa at 15:52:31 Thursday February 15 2001
After months of silence, I can't resist positing to tell Adam that I was dragged up in Palmers Green. (I became a West Ham fan in 1966 for three reasons: wanted to be different to my Arsenal/Tottenham school mates; my grandfather once had a trial for the Hammers; and after the WC, I thought I was onto a sure thing - which I'm still awaiting.) Your commuting tales make me quite nostalgic, and also remind me why I'm now living 3000 miles away.

Good news is that Sunderland game not on TV here. We get two or three premier league games each week, can't complain about lack of WHU but the selection has been poor - only victory shown was the shaky 1-0 over Newcastle.

Adam at 15:50:49 Thursday February 15 2001
Mike, are you going to drink your way through the night or do you have other things to keep you occupied?

Mike the Hammer at 15:38:58 Thursday February 15 2001
Adam.I'm not going to bother going to bed Friday night,as I need to be up at about 3:00am ,as I'm picking friends up and driving to UP.
I may well be rolling out of the coach at 11:00am though....

Mike the Hammer at 15:26:51 Thursday February 15 2001
Daz! Result geezer!
Now all you have to do is to stay up Friday night,and drive down to London for Saturday morning!

Dazza at 15:20:28 Thursday February 15 2001
OH YESSSSSSSSs... just had a phone call from a mate of mine.. he has got a spare ticket and free travel for Saturday and he's giving it to me!!!!!!!

C&B at 14:52:55 Thursday February 15 2001
Saturday: Sunderland 1 (Quinn) West Ham 1 (Di Canio (pen))

Wednesday: West Ham 2 (Di Canio, Kanoute) Sunderland 1 (Phillips)

Adam at 14:25:33 Thursday February 15 2001
Sunderland 1 West Ham United 2

that is my prediction for Saturday. Mike I wont be there for this one, i will be falling out my bed at 11am and watching it all nervously on Sky.

Dazza at 14:23:49 Thursday February 15 2001
some of us have work to do during the hours of 9-5.30 !!!

Paolo - surfing the net (which is an odd phrase, if you think about it...) at 13:36:53 Thursday February 15 2001
You wouldn't think we were only 2 days away from our biggest game of the season. Not only is it summer on Alf's, but KUMB's top story (their ONLY story!) is the impending redesign of the official WHU web site!!!

Quite an interesting 'should he stay or should he go' debate on Harry on Ironworks, though - http://www.westhamonline.com/features14-02-01-2.shtml

Mike the Hammer at 12:08:32 Thursday February 15 2001
Damn! It was worth a try.....

Turnip in Northampton at 11:57:41 Thursday February 15 2001
Paolo: that'll be me and, soon, UHH then?
Adam: you need to move out here to Turnipland. A gentle seven or eight minutes through the rolling Northants countryside, a five minute thrash down the A45 and there I am - in work in less than 15 minutes. Life as a turnip has its consolations...
MtH: sorry Mike - I'd know your voice anywhere.

Mike the Hammer.speak in g through an interpreter,so it doesn't sound like me at 11:16:17 Thursday February 15 2001
Anyone else going to Sunnerland?

Adam at 10:57:15 Thursday February 15 2001
My Journey to work.

Decided to get the 329 Bus instead of using the train from Palmers Green BR Station, due to WAGN's incompetence.
Waited 5 mins for bus but managed to get a seat. Took ages crawling through Green Lanes. This is mainly due to the Greek-Cypriot population owning roughly 10 cars per household.
Arrived at Wood Green station and refused to get on the first tube cos it was so packed. Got the next it was still packed, so stood all the way to Holborn.
Got off to change onto The Central Line, naturally the escalators are still not completely working there. Why does it take London Underground over a year to repair escalators?
Finally made the central line, that was packed as well. Couldnt get on the first tube and just squeezed on to the 2nd one.
Got off at Bank, had to step over that ludicrous gap and then made my way to the DLR.
This actually turned up immediately and I got a seat. Got off at Westferry and walked the 5mins to work. Arrived 1 hour and 10 minutes later, 15 mins late again.
Oh how i love the transport system in London.

Mike the Hammer at 10:55:21 Thursday February 15 2001
" "

Paolo at 10:47:30 Thursday February 15 2001
Sorry - I dozed off for a minute there.

Thought for the day - reserve one day a week for turnips.

Ian in Northampton at 10:22:18 Thursday February 15 2001
Paolo: would that be more or less riveting than the Arse - or Spurs - under GG?

Paolo at 10:21:20 Thursday February 15 2001
And yesterday I had TWO cans of Coke with my lunch! Just like that. I went up to the counter, stared the woman in the eye, and said "Give me TWO!". And then I drank them straight off, one after the other.

Life on the edge - you can't beat it.

Paolo at 10:18:31 Thursday February 15 2001
Anyone want to know the details of my bus journey from Maidstone to Chatham every day? Riveting stuff, I can assure you.

C&B at 10:16:18 Thursday February 15 2001
More boring that the arse under Graham?

Spurs under Graham!

Ian, cupping his ear,in Northampton at 10:16:06 Thursday February 15 2001
Sorry - did someone say something?

Mike the Hammer,be in g ignored at 09:53:18 Thursday February 15 2001

U.H.H at 09:35:40 Thursday February 15 2001
Cheers Ian, ignore MtH nobody could ever be as boring the arse under GG.
Cheers for the info, i should be o.k though, i start work at 8 in m.k so i should miss the 9am build up.

Boring Ian in Northampton at 09:31:51 Thursday February 15 2001
MtH: w aim to please. And I have got a tache, but it's much nicer than Vic's...

Mike the Hammer at 09:09:35 Thursday February 15 2001
Ian,congratulations.I think even Vic the tache would find that post almost as exciting as some of the Gooner perfomances from the early 90's under GG....

Ian the Nurse Botherer in Northampton at 08:57:26 Thursday February 15 2001
UHH: sorry for the delay - I was out all day yesterday (they were trying new medication on me...) Before you finally lay your hat, trying the drive to/from MK might be something you should do. What I was really doing yesterday was laying myself at Richard Branson's mercy to get me from MK to Euston. You don't want to hear about the journey on the train, but I left Bozeat at around 8:30 and didn't get to the station till about 9:10 - the traffic was pretty slow in places. Also, on the way back: I got to MK station at 5:30, but didn't get back to Bozeat till 6:15. Just to help you calibrate this, I'd reckon on a non-rush-hour journey taking around 25 minutes. Much depends on your timing, I guess. And no, we've never been snowed in, nor has there been any flooding in the village (but they still talk about the great flood of 1953, though...)

Mike the Hammer at 08:06:56 Thursday February 15 2001
Concerned,I think you're right....

Concerned about Dag Dave. at 08:01:50 Thursday February 15 2001
Dude!have you eaten all your stash?

daaaaaa at 00:29:52 Thursday February 15 2001

Dd at 00:29:26 Thursday February 15 2001
gotta go lie dowm . cAnt thnnk

dag dacv at 00:25:54 Thursday February 15 2001
gota cut throuh the shit. Is this really whjat we wanyt

Dag dave at 00:24:23 Thursday February 15 2001
Look past the scoreboard. I love the life I lead. I lead the life I love. right?

Dagenham Dave at 00:21:57 Thursday February 15 2001
It's not always about scoring goals ...... if you know what I mean.

Dagenham Dave at 00:20:01 Thursday February 15 2001
You have to look much deeper than that...... man!

Mike the Hammer,still work in g but not as pissed off as Paolo at 19:06:16 Wednesday February 14 2001
Good call Paolo....

Paolo - still at work and totally pissed off at 18:35:09 Wednesday February 14 2001
Here's a thought:

Win Saturday - brilliant cup win, can we make it to the final?

Lose Saturday - 14th in the league, out of all the cups, season over, probably lowest finish for 4 years.

As I'm always saying, Harry is a gambler, not a manager.

U.H.H at 17:22:31 Wednesday February 14 2001
[Johnny boy]I prefer the 'Linda block'[?] out of Dream Team
[shit program, fit bird]

U.H.H at 17:20:02 Wednesday February 14 2001
Some depressing reading for you;http://msn.co.uk/page/32-574.asp

Johnny Boy at 15:36:54 Wednesday February 14 2001
PHWWWOOOOOOAAAARRR!! Who ere fancies Claire Tomlinson? I think she's right tasty!!

Johnny Boy at 15:36:47 Wednesday February 14 2001
PHWWWOOOOOOAAAARRR!! Who ere fancies Claire Tomlinson? I think should right tasty!!

Luke Warm Larry at 15:31:20 Wednesday February 14 2001
Harry has to start thinking about playing Toddy (the Bulgarian striker) or Suker. They were both brilliant for us in the reserves the other night.

Paolo at 14:48:53 Wednesday February 14 2001
UHH - yep, and an excellent one at that. Best film I've seen in ages - go and see it.

And Trevor Brooking supported Thatcher - funny old world at times.

Arfur at 14:47:35 Wednesday February 14 2001
Ere! Whats that you say mister?

Harry at 14:44:31 Wednesday February 14 2001
You lot don't no what your talking about. West Ham are gods. I luv em I do I luv em!

Dazza at 12:38:26 Wednesday February 14 2001
is he related to you ??

U.H.H at 12:33:12 Wednesday February 14 2001
[Dazza]Compare it to Mad Jack mcMad the winner of last year's king of the mad people competition,and you have a pretty good comparison.

C&B at 12:26:17 Wednesday February 14 2001
Half as mad as two bags.

Dazza at 12:25:32 Wednesday February 14 2001
how mad is a bag of spiders exactly ??

U.H.H at 12:22:47 Wednesday February 14 2001
If we're still on about dictator's, Nicolae Ceausescu. Mad as a bag of Spiders.

C&B (grumbl in ng as usual) at 12:18:41 Wednesday February 14 2001
The sooner we get knocked out of the cup the better. I'd rather finish 17th than finish 18th and reach Cardiff.

Jonny at 12:15:09 Wednesday February 14 2001
What are you lot on about? Let's get back to slagging off WH. Teams used to shit themselves when we attacked them at UP, Monday there was no desire to score we need someone to put their head, foot, knee or whatever in where it hurts and bloody score.
Anyway I'mn already nervous about Sat - our seasons riding on it.

Adam at 11:58:38 Wednesday February 14 2001
There certainly have been some mad leaders in this crazy world. I'm sure there are more to come as well.

U.H.H at 11:56:55 Wednesday February 14 2001
For a good old fashioned nutters you have to go back to Ghengis Khan or Atilla the Hun,those chaps really knew how to rape and pillage. and they loved their mum's.

Adam at 11:54:24 Wednesday February 14 2001
and what about Pinochet, sort of the earth

C&B at 11:41:05 Wednesday February 14 2001
That Hitler was a good egg too. And Franco? One in a million.

Adam at 11:34:51 Wednesday February 14 2001
I agree with PDC on his views about Muss. He was a benevelant chap who did a lot of work for Charidee.

U.H.H at 11:13:41 Wednesday February 14 2001
That Satan vibe is not my bag man. That's like...well scarey man! Ozzy Osbourne is well heavy!! [18 stone]

C&B at 11:05:34 Wednesday February 14 2001
Actually it's more Black Sabbath than The Who...

Swap those lava lamps for inverted crosses and Pentangles.

U.H.H in A TIME WARP. at 10:29:03 Wednesday February 14 2001
Yeah man,im on the Magic Bus with Boris the Spider and we are going to Woodstock to smoke some joss sticks with Mick Jagger.......Who is driving a Mini........with a big flower on the bonnet.
I've finished now.

C&B at 10:02:04 Wednesday February 14 2001
Wearing flares and beads, I trust.

U.H.H in MY GROOVY PAD WITH MY LARVA LAMP...MAN! at 09:22:52 Wednesday February 14 2001

C&B at 09:09:54 Wednesday February 14 2001
Isn't it that film about the 70's Rock journalist? Memory Lane material for Golden Oldies!

U.H.H at 08:29:06 Wednesday February 14 2001
[Paolo]What's 'almost famous'? a film?
Im going to see Hannibal at the weekend[hopefully after see the boy's go into the next round].

One for Adam and Paolo at 06:38:56 Wednesday February 14 2001
Talking Sport: Di Canio paints odd picture with views on Mussolini
By Paul Hayward (Filed: 13/02/2001)

ANYONE who thinks sports reporting is easy should go to an England press conference when one of the less effusive footballers has been put up for an interview/teeth pulling. Fearing the next day's headlines, the interviewee sits like a captured fighter pilot, arms folded and eyes narrowed, offering his name, rank and serial number but not much else.

Paolo Di Canio: a fan of Il Duce
It got so bad a couple of years back that the man from The Mirror brought a merciful end to an especially awkward silence by asking Darren Anderton: "Is there anything you'd like to ask us?" It is in this context that any footballer who is willing to venture beyond the usual one-game-at-a-time stonewalling is listened to with the reverence which Sixties pop stars summoned in the presence of Indian mystics.

Which brings us to Paolo Di Canio and his Mussolini complex, which has created less of a commotion than you might have expected, probably because Di Canio is commonly thought to be one slice short of the full salami. In essence, the most naturally gifted Italian in the Premiership is a fan of Il Duce. Sort of. West Ham fans are so spellbound by the workings of Di Canio's feet that they seem to have forgotten that Mussolini's pal, Hitler, tried to turn the East End into a brick depository in the most savage bombing campaign waged against these isles.

Now there are those who think politics should be kept out of sport - and most of them live in Britain, where sport is regarded as a strange sub-culture or independent republic divorced from the rest of life (in America and Australia there is no such snobbery, which may be why they are better at sport than us). But since Di Canio himself introduced the darkest period in Italian history into Premiership dinner party chat, we ought to investigate what he meant when he claimed that Mussolini was "basically a very principled, ethical individual", and see where we end up.

In his generally fascinating autobiography (Collins Willow Ł16.99), Di Canio has this to say about his political leanings: "Perhaps precisely because I am right-wing, I am fascinated by Benito Mussolini. Remember those mobile phone advertisements where they asked people who they would most like to have a one-to-one with? Ian Wright picked Dr Martin Luther King, my choice would have been Mussolini. I own dozens of Mussolini biographies. I think he was a deeply misunderstood individual."

This view is not uncommon in the back streets of Rome, where Di Canio grew up. It stems, one hopes, from nothing more sinister than a superficial reading of the great dictator's role in the cataclysms of the mid-twentieth century. Di Canio is discerning enough to describe many of Il Duce's actions as "vile or calculated" and accuses him of "turning against his sense of right and wrong, compromising his ethics to save the country".

Unfortunately, this soft-focus interpretation of Italian history neglects to give due weight to the fact that Mussolini signed a `Pact of Steel' with Hitler in May 1939 and thus helped lead Europe into a war that cost more than 50 million lives. Forming an alliance with a barbarian and psychopath would not be high on most people's list of the best ways in which to "save the country". Di Canio swears that he is "not a racist or a xenophobe" and, in fairness, his political musings do not suggest blind allegiance to the 20th century's most destructive ideology.

Yet Jewish spectators at Upton Park must have felt a nasty jolt in the guts when they reached pages 256-7 of their hero's book (there are only 264 pages of text, which suggests that the publishers tried to hide the author's political views near the goal stats and the index). After July 1938, when he published a manifesto on race, Mussolini began a legal onslaught against Jews, stripping Italian citizenship from many and excluding all 47,000 members of the Italo-Jewish community from the professions. Jewish children were thrown out of state schools. Some ended up in German death camps.

What does this have to do with West Ham, football, and the sanctification of Di Canio in the East End, which still bears deep emotional scars from the Blitz? It shows that a little eccentricity goes a long way in getting people to ignore or forgive you, and that footballers wanting to break out of the intellectual ghetto had better be sure of their facts. Finally, it reminds us that nobody can ever predict who will be destroyed for expressing unpalatable views, and who will glide on unscathed.

Doubtless, Di Canio is fully appreciative of the freedom a liberal democracy affords him to express such views.

Paolo - on the night shift at 23:46:49 Tuesday February 13 2001
Just been to see Almost Famous - really, really excellent! Go and see it NOW!

Dagenham Dave at 20:03:16 Tuesday February 13 2001
Yeah we were shocking (especially first half) and all day Monday i had a feeling that Cov were gonna get something. Fucks me off. We're in for a tight end of season now boys.

Paolo at 17:40:09 Tuesday February 13 2001
UHH - I don't mind you chatting with Ian (after all it keeps him occupied and stops him bothering his nurse), I just couldn't believe I was getting blocked by our web checker on such a conversation!

U.H.H at 17:11:35 Tuesday February 13 2001
Sorry Paolo old chap but i dont know anyone else who live's there. I need to find out a bout the place before i 'lay my hat'.

Paolo at 17:06:46 Tuesday February 13 2001
I can't believe this, I'm getting 'web access denied' on a discussion about what it's like to like in bloody Bozeat, or whatever it's called!!!

U.H.H at 16:53:22 Tuesday February 13 2001
[ian] Have you ever been snowed in? and what's the traffic like in the morning[to m.k]

U.H.H at 16:53:03 Tuesday February 13 2001
Have ever been snowed in? and what's the traffic like in the morning[to m.k]

U.H.H at 16:35:44 Tuesday February 13 2001
We've actually got an open fire[very rural] and i've got some fishing waders,so i dont have to buy wellies[so im sorted on the cow shit]
not sure about chewing straw......yuk!

Ian in Northampton at 16:23:08 Tuesday February 13 2001
UHH: yes. 1. Don't step in cow shit. 2. Watch 'Straw Dogs' and be afraid - be very afraid... 3. Buy a lot of warm, waterproof clothes. 4. Learn to walk AND chew on a piece of straw at the same time. 5. Learn to repeat: "That Maggie Thatcherwas OK, but she was a bit of a wooly liberal for me." OK?

U.H.H at 16:18:05 Tuesday February 13 2001
[Ian] anymore country side tips for me today?

Ian in Northampton at 16:01:53 Tuesday February 13 2001
Paolo: I take your point - it was a matter of principle rather than a comment on last night's game. But: is all philosophy bollocks, or just that particular piece of it? Is that the patter of reindeer feet I can hear - so early in the year?

Griff at 15:50:31 Tuesday February 13 2001
Maybe he's suffered 'death by tache' after a particularly vigourous defensive cluster fuck.

P.S. 1-0 to Lyon I reckon. Foe header. Wish we hadn't sold him.

Mike the Hammer at 15:30:48 Tuesday February 13 2001
speaking of which...anyone heard from VtG??
Or is he keeping quiet due to lack of silverware?

Mike the Hammer at 15:29:58 Tuesday February 13 2001
tache's and curly perms mate.....

C&B at 15:13:31 Tuesday February 13 2001
Mick: I swear it was Souness. All those scouse cunts looks the same, eh?

U.H.H at 14:59:35 Tuesday February 13 2001
What did you disillusioned hammers think of Winterburn last night?

U.H.H at 14:53:39 Tuesday February 13 2001
[Dick]His ginger syrup.
[Griff]To have a sucessful defensive cluster fuck you need four defenders plus an iffy goal keeper all running for the same ball and not communicating.see also the build up to B.F.J.H disallowed goal.

Griff at 14:35:52 Tuesday February 13 2001
Dick - so do we, a defensive midfielder, a goalkeeper, someone who can score and someone to tell the team what to do.

Paolo at 14:35:41 Tuesday February 13 2001
Ian - don't give me all that philosophy bollocks, you weren't there. If that goal had stood we would have lost. Why? Quite simple: a) they can score goals, and b) we can't.

So maybe you believe that goal would have woken us up and spurred us on to victory? Well, while you're at it, you'd better leave a few mince pies out for Santa as well.

Dick in the City at 14:33:45 Tuesday February 13 2001
Griff - Di Canio will play against Sunderland but they have 4 key players missing.

Griff at 14:27:50 Tuesday February 13 2001
Does Di Canio getting booked last night mean he's suspended for the Sunderland game?

I'm off for a defensive cluster fuck.

Mike the Hammer in a very picky mood at 14:22:23 Tuesday February 13 2001
C&B,it wasn't Souness,it was McDermott that handled the ball on the line from an Alvin header....
Sorry....I'll get me anorak...

Dirty Dick in the City at 13:53:08 Tuesday February 13 2001
UHH - And his ginger what???
He also kicked Berkovich in the head!!

Del at 13:47:31 Tuesday February 13 2001
HR hasn't forgotten - he's never known the concept unless your name was Eyal Berkovic. Still I looked at our bench and there was only Ian Pearce that looked worthy of a place in the starting line up and so I wasn't surprised he didn't change it. One striker on the bench at home v Coventry - A*se.

Frank C at 13:17:08 Tuesday February 13 2001
Another thing, H seems to have forgotten the whole concept of Subs...last night was crying out to 'change things around' Why doesn't he do it????

Frank C at 13:13:30 Tuesday February 13 2001
How can we perform the way we did against Scum and then carry out 90 minutes of trash witnessed last night?
The midfield was outplayed for a lot of the game. Carrick and Lampard were missing for most of it....Cole was a headless chicken at times...going nowhere fast and running into dead ends. Dailly and not just because of the OG had a complete mare of a game. Pearce's age is tarting to show and hartson is just a big Welsh terd.......I reckon we're saving it for Saturday.

C&B at 13:01:50 Tuesday February 13 2001
And if we don't? Song?

Steve at 12:47:22 Tuesday February 13 2001
Schemmel is fucking ACE! His name is going on the back of my shirt for next season if we sign him.

U.H.H at 12:20:41 Tuesday February 13 2001
NO. He peaked 24 goals in one season,bad knee injury that reoccur's,drink and gambling problems,bad attitude.
never really hit good form since,wont keep Coventry up.
And his Ginger.........and welsh.

Question for Hartson haters at 11:51:56 Tuesday February 13 2001
Wish we still had him?

Question for Hartson haters at 11:51:42 Tuesday February 13 2001
Wihs we still had him?

C&B at 11:50:10 Tuesday February 13 2001
Ian - spot on. I never tire of making the same point about the 1981 League Cup final. Had Sammy Lee been given offside we would have won when Stewart put the penalty away. YES BUT, had Liverpool not scored when Lee was laying in the 6 yard box, they would not have defended in numbers and Souness wouldn't have handled the ball that led to the pen.

Anyway, we should have lost last night. That was a foul on Hartson at the end. 3-1 to Cov...

Ian in Northampton at 11:45:24 Tuesday February 13 2001
Paolo: "le nez de Cleopatre: s'il eut ete un centimetre plus court, toute la face de la terre aurait change" (with apologies for the lack of accents..) When you say "Hartson's goal should have been allowed, so we should have lost" you make a fundamental error - one which is made time after time. The fact is, if Hartson's goal had been allowed to stand, the entire course of the rest of the game would have changed. Sure, it might have been decisive. But, equally, we could have gone on to win 2-1, 3-1 or even 5-1 - or 7-4 for that matter. It's a philosophical nonsense for anyone to claim that "if that disallowed goal hadn't been disallowed, we would have won". Who can know what might have happened if any decision had gone the other way? Obviously, this thinking applies less as you get towards the end of the match - an 89th minute decision is less likely to have an impact on the final result than a 1st minute decision. But having a goal disallowed in e.g. the 1st minute, drawing 0-0 and then saying "If that goal hadn't been disallowed, we'd have won" is, to coin a phrase (and this isn't a personal attack, more a general observation) complete and utter bollocks.

Mike the Hammer at 10:40:53 Tuesday February 13 2001
Paolo,I was gulty for that one...started off with a multiple bowlocks,which obviously did the trick! Good to meet you last night mate.

Del at 10:34:24 Tuesday February 13 2001
When is HR going to realise that we are in serious trouble in the league. Every year there is one team that drops into the bottom three without realising it until it's too late. 'We're too good to go down' etc.
I enjoyed the game - I normally want Coventry to go down, but if they continue to try to play football as they did last night, I hope they stay up. What really peed me off was HR saying we defended too deep for the freekick - who coaches them for christ's sake (sorry for bringing religion into it). Kanoute had one of those nights when he couldn't hit a cows arse with a banjo, UHH is right about Joe Cole but I thought Schemmel is the most enthusiastic player (bar DiCanio and Cole) that we have.

Bugger! See you all at Sunderland

Val at 10:33:47 Tuesday February 13 2001
Positive points about last night?

Frank Lampard
Joe Cole
Schemmell
Tihenen
We got a point.
The pasties were hot.
The new west stand is looking good.
The Hammerettes were bouncier than usual.

Benny in Aldgate at 10:27:15 Tuesday February 13 2001
I would have been happier this morning with three points. But one point from playing a Cov side that every other side seems to beat without much problem is almost as bad as getting no points at all. John Hartson was always going to up for this game and I was pleased to see that we virtually kept him out of the game in the second half. I don't think he will do Coventry any favours this season. He looks overweight still and has a tendancy to lose the plot and put on the pounds once he gets recognition from the fans. He was much suited to the first division. If we are to compete with the best we need to brush aside teams like this without even breaking into a sweat. Last night we looked ordinary. Teams are wising up to Di Canio's tricks, Carrick was quiet, I was pissed of with Stuart Pearce whacking the ball 50 yards everytime he got it. Who decided he should take the free kicks and corners? Frank Lampard was better at free-kicks and Di Canio (I thought took the corners). We're not in danger of a relegation battle at the present, but another lack-lustre performance like that and we will be back to looking at other results with a view to digging us out of trouble. We will probably pull of a suprise result against Sunderland and a healthy cup run. Tihenen I think is an excelellnt asset to the team. But I am more impressed with Schemmel. He really does look good. I have been very very very impressed by him. Sign em up Harry!

Paolo at 10:24:42 Tuesday February 13 2001
Someone's been using naughty language again! All I can see is UHH's last posting.

According to the papers that Hartson goal should have been allowed, so we should have lost last night.

I hope the Lampard haters were watching last night, because he was one of the few players who had a really good game. Carrick, on the other hand, made ricket after ricket. But, curiously, I didn't hear anyone moaning about him, or shouting at Harry to get him taken off....

U.H.H at 08:22:14 Tuesday February 13 2001
Harry,stop J.C from shooting miles out side the box.....cause he's no good at it.

C&B at 08:20:24 Tuesday February 13 2001
I actually enjoyed the game last night. A lot of dire play but there was a lot of action - thanks mostly to a fired up Coventry side who deserved their point.

I think the sooner we are out of the cup the better as far as the league is concerned. Those boys obviously had one eye on Saturday. How else do you explain their reluctance to be "first to the ball"?

U.H.H at 08:18:55 Tuesday February 13 2001
A truly dire performance.as already said below, how can we have such a squad of players and play like the keystone cops? And on SKY all they went on about was B.F.J.H,who did as little as he did before he left us.
Our midfield trio looked very poor,Forrest always scares the shit out of me when he's in goal, but last night he was pretty good[?]
We really did look a bottom of the table team, that felt sorry for Coventry....so we gave them a point[Defensive cluster fuck]
Not looking forward to Saturday.

Mike the Hammer at 07:39:53 Tuesday February 13 2001
Bollocks,bollocks,bollocks,bollocks,bollocks.
Morning all.
Paolo,was a pleasure to meet you as well,and DaveiP.
Niki,next round is on me darling!
Dazza,gotta agree with you on that one...

Paolo at 00:36:31 Tuesday February 13 2001
And to those thinking - ah, but we've got the cup run to look forward to. Just remember, when that's over, this is the reality we have to come back to.

Paolo at 00:34:01 Tuesday February 13 2001
We are indeed deep in the brown smelly stuff. I can't honestly say I enjoyed any of tonight's game, even the goal left me feeling hollow. How has H managed to assemble "the best squad we've had in years" and then produce crap football like that?

Super Finn had an excellent game though, we've got to buy him - assuming he still wants to play for us after what he's seen recently.

And it was nice meeting up with MtH at last (and of course Nik and DaveiP!). Only Dazza to go now and I've got the set!

Dazza at 23:03:36 Monday February 12 2001
shit game... shit result.. but wasnt the hammerettes lovely and bouncy tonight

TerryTTT at 22:15:57 Monday February 12 2001
We are just about hitting rock-bottom now. Fucking hell, how much more of this unadulterated crap do we have to put up with? Even our good players are becoming really fucking ordinary. We have no fucking strike force, a lightweight midfield and a defence that is wobbly every fucking time the ball goes in the air. What the fuck do we practice on the laughingly-called training ground. Obviously not corners or free-kicks judging by the continually amateurish offerings we see week after fucking week. 1-1 against fucking Coventry; thats now one win in TEN sodding league matches and TWO goals in the last five. Yet what is fuckwit HR rewarded with - another fucking contract. The only contract that absolutley useless piece of shit deserves is one that will put the arsehole down!!!

EA at 21:01:09 Monday February 12 2001
For Gawd sakes - SACK REDKNAPP!!!!!!

2 forwards at home against a crap team like Coventry ????????????

The man has NOOOOO IDEAAA!!!!!!!!!

EA at 20:20:36 Monday February 12 2001
Gawd - SJH already netted

Ian in Northampton at 18:56:51 Monday February 12 2001
UHH - don't tell me you're a similar age to Paolo/me? Heaven help us all.... Nah, Bozeat isn't so bad - I'm kidding, really. It must have something going for it - I've lived there 20 years. Still regarded as a newcomer, though. If someone in the village asks where I live, I just tell 'em "Tom Cave's old house". 'nuff said?

U.H.H at 17:16:05 Monday February 12 2001
[Ian]No i touched the sky and it was all too beautiful.
Have you ever watched 'THE LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN'?
Bozeat is starting to sound like Royston Vasey.

Ian in Northampton at 16:40:32 Monday February 12 2001
Depending on the question... In Itchcoo Park: got high, I suppose? Or your surname. 9/10 people in Bozeat bear the surname Drage - hence the surfeit of fingers and toes.

U.H.H at 16:21:24 Monday February 12 2001
[Ian] which bit do you mean?

Ian in Northampton at 15:51:35 Monday February 12 2001
UHH: What did you do there?
Bumpkin Iron: start counting your fingers - and toes... And consider changing your name to 'Drage'...

Bumpkin Iron at 15:35:33 Monday February 12 2001
What's this crap about Harry letting Hannu go and giving Stimac another two year contract?

U.H.H in ITCHYCOO PARK at 15:31:54 Monday February 12 2001

U.H.H at 15:04:07 Monday February 12 2001
[Ian]Very well explained,i will sound like i've lived there forever.
I think i'll start calling my self 'BUMPKIN IRON'.
OOOO-RRRRRRR.
"Are you local?"

Claret and Swiftly Fading Bronze at 14:16:34 Monday February 12 2001
Ian: I knew I could rely on you.

Ian in Northampton at 14:14:17 Monday February 12 2001
UHH: take the 'Beauj' in 'Beaujolais'. Add 'ut'. Beauj-ut. Not Bo-zeet. Not Bozy-at. Beauj-ut. And yes, you will. Sorry...

U.H.H at 14:09:28 Monday February 12 2001
[Ian]Is the emphasis on the 'z' or not.
Does this mean i will become a carrot cruncher?

Paolo at 13:59:45 Monday February 12 2001
Jonny - Wednesday March 7th - just before our blank weekend (otherwise known as the FA Cup 1/4 Finals...)

Ian in Northampton at 13:51:51 Monday February 12 2001
C&B: "Oh, mustn't grumble..." UHH: glad to hear it. Now you need to learn to pronounce the name of the place....

c&b at 13:35:39 Monday February 12 2001
Bargain of the week: Small Faces Best for Ł3.50:

Gor blimey, 'Allo Mrs. Jones 'Ow's your Bert's lumbago?

Jonny at 13:33:45 Monday February 12 2001
Has the date for the postponed Chelsea home match been announced yet?
Also its nice to see us in the top end of the market - Harry went to see Christian (Brazilian striker at PSG)- but PSG lost 4-0.
I'm getting very nervous about tonight - the Hartson thing is really playing on my mind, he was great 4 us.
Come on you IRONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

U.H.H at 13:11:54 Monday February 12 2001
[Ian]Things went well,could be neighbours by the end of the month.
4-1 tonight-B.F.J.H wont score.
UP THE HAMMERS!!!!!!!

Mike the Hammer at 12:52:19 Monday February 12 2001
Paolo,OK mate...I'll be the guy looking like a piece of furniture in a three piece suite.....

Paolo at 12:03:07 Monday February 12 2001
and Dazza, of course!

Paolo at 12:02:53 Monday February 12 2001
MtH - you could always join me for a beer and a moan in the supporters club. I'll be the bloke looking like a complete prat in a coat and a three-piece suit.

Bring back Saturdays games!!!!

Mike the Hammer at 09:43:59 Monday February 12 2001
OK mate..see you there.

Dazza at 09:43:16 Monday February 12 2001
sounds good to me

Mike the Hammer at 09:32:22 Monday February 12 2001
Daz,where's easiest for you mate?
Last resort,BML before the game for a balti pie and a beer....

Dazza at 09:19:54 Monday February 12 2001
would like to Mike but I dont finish work until 5.30... if the roads are kind I might make it by 7.30.. where yer gonna be?

Mike the Hammer at 09:16:22 Monday February 12 2001
Morning all.
Anyone else fancy a beer round UP before the game?

Ian in Northampton at 08:47:51 Monday February 12 2001
UHH: how did your visit to Bozeat go?

Michael Carrick in the words of Claret and Bronze at 07:49:32 Monday February 12 2001
"My ambition is to win things and I can do that here."

But not with Harry as manager...

Caroline in a blast from the past at 19:45:59 Sunday February 11 2001
If anyone is still interested in Rio there is an interview with him on the Sunday Times web site. It cover his childhood growing up in Peckham, signing for West Ham, etc. (And L***s.) http://www.sunday-times.co.uk/ and go to Sport, Football, etc.

Dagenham Dave at 19:21:44 Sunday February 11 2001
Cat your mind back to 1983 (i think!) Liverpool tanked us 6-0 at Anfield. I was dragged to school knowing that 80% of kids there were Liverpool "Fans" ... and yes, they were all waiting for the only Hammer (except my younger brother who was sadly brainwashed along with yours truly!) I was chased round school all day..... It was a bloody nightmare but I remember thinking that I was happy to not be following the herds in their shite yellow "crown paints" shirts. Doubt many of them still follow Liverpool now ...probablyy changed to Munichs circa 1993 ... bastards.

Dagenham Dave at 19:16:58 Sunday February 11 2001
I'm from Walthamstow ....but we moved out when i was a kid. Lived in Swindon since 1977 ... Dad's a big Hammer so you just get brain washed don't ya! Years of misery have followed, loads of fights in the school playground, taunting, cup semi-final agonies (much to the pleasure of all my school mates)But I'm West Ham through and Through ... and no-one can say otherwise.

Dagenham Dave at 19:12:26 Sunday February 11 2001
I'm not really from Dagenham you know..... never even been there.... My name ain't Dave either ....it's Ian. My Dad's from Dagenham and all my mates nicknamed him "Dagenham Dave" for no reason! My Dad's name is Edward!

Dagenham Dave at 19:09:19 Sunday February 11 2001
Tomorrows game is a big one for the boys now. Bloody hell even Southampton are ahead of us!!! COME ON YOU IRONS!!!

Dagenham Dave at 19:08:18 Sunday February 11 2001
Don't do it Paulo ...!

Paolo at 14:15:06 Sunday February 11 2001
Anyone around today?

Any thoughts on yesterday's results as they affect us? Seems to me that whatever happens, one thing is for sure, we can't afford to lose, or even draw, tomorrow.

A glance at the table in today's paper was about as depressing as it's possible to get. We might end up (just) in the top half come May, but we can kiss goodbye to any thoughts of Europe. And if Harry's pinning all his hopes on FA Cup success, then he's an even worse gambler (and manager) than I thought. Even if we did actually win it, it would still have been a gambler's call, not a manager's.

Where's that razor blade, I'm sure I left it around here somewhere....

PH in East London at 21:27:26 Saturday February 10 2001
http://anzwers.org/free/westhamfc/

Paolo at 15:30:47 Saturday February 10 2001
Dick - it's Paolo - with an 'o'!!!!

Anyone else going to be in the Supporters Club before the game?

Frank C in At bloody work at 13:52:31 Saturday February 10 2001
US Hammer: There was a true white horse at that one....theer's so much pollution in the atmosphere these days that to find a true white horse would be impossible. So ban ggoes that thoery. Mind you scum Totts are suggesting it's there year because of some sad notion that they always win when there's a one at year end......Wankers.

Dick in the City at 09:29:16 Saturday February 10 2001
Nik & Paulo. Can't you use the 'phone or another site. All this dating is doing my head in and as for UHH....
Let's see some football talk, you should never mix pleasure with the game we all love.

U.S. Hammer in Minnesota at 06:39:29 Saturday February 10 2001
We appeared in the very first Wembley final losing to Bolton.
Lets hope we dont get to Cardiff and bloody lose too!

Nik at 20:30:12 Friday February 09 2001
Oh have they? Shows you wot the feck I know!

Dazza at 19:01:41 Friday February 09 2001
I thought they cancelled the strike??

Nik at 18:02:48 Friday February 09 2001
Paolo, remember there's a Tube strike on Monday. We might all have to walk from West Ham!!

Paolo at 17:43:39 Friday February 09 2001
Nik, if you're around, I'm coming up under my own steam again Monday, so you can buy me a beer in the supporter's club if you like! (6:30 ish)

Paolo at 17:41:43 Friday February 09 2001
Ian - I was only there for a year - 69/70 (they expelled me!) The head of English then was a guy called Frenchum, I think. I didn't realise it went back to 1959!

UHH - ha, ha, ha - the old war joke - haven't heard that one for a while!

Ian in Northampton at 17:31:58 Friday February 09 2001
Paolo: long, long time ago (cue for a song?): 1959 - 1964. (UHH: so not that long after the war then) He was Head of English. From memory, you're the same age as I am, and at the time, I was 7-12, so I guess you might have been there just after his time? Hello Griff! UHH: there's aa much chance of me being in the pub then as there is of - well - us finishing top six this season. Apart from incurring the wrath of 'er indoors, I'm supposed to be taking my daughter to play for the county hockey team. You're probably not old enough yet to be experiencing the dubious joys of fatherhood - or at least, being a father to a teenage girl who does hockey Monday and Sunday, football Friday and Saturday and rugby on Wednesdays. Perhaps if I told H we'd definitely sell another three shirts in Bozeat, he'd sign her?

U.H.H at 17:06:30 Friday February 09 2001
[Paolo]your alive then, Ian's dad probably taught there after the war,not before.[joke]

Griff at 16:57:06 Friday February 09 2001
Haven't been on here for a while. However, if we lose on Monday, I will be forced to change my opinion of Harry to "Nut-Job".

Hang on, the big hands on 12, and the small hands on beer. Which can only mean one thing.......

Paolo at 16:16:35 Friday February 09 2001
Ian - I went to North Romford Comp!! When was your dad a teacher there?

Adam at 16:02:52 Friday February 09 2001
My History as a Hammer:

My Great Grandfather on my dads side was a West Ham fan, he was born and brought up in East Ham. My Grandfather on my mums side was also a Hammer brought up in Whitechapel.
However I was born in Edmonton and lived all my life in Southgate, N14. Living in a staunch Arsenal/Tottenham area I could have easily have been tempted by the dark side (my dad is a Spurs season ticket holder). But luckily for me, my brother and his mate Roger supported West Ham and got about 5 others to follow.
I was 2 years younger than my brother but followed his team (and it was around 75), me and a mate got about 10 others in our year to support West Ham.
I know of at least 10 people who still follow the Hammers from my primary school.

U.H.H at 15:59:57 Friday February 09 2001
IAN-I lived in Clifton RD.Relatives still in Romford and Chelmsford,Dad was from Stratford, mum from Romford,brought up in CLARET AND BLUE...and i'll be buried in it.
Incase i dont post again, i will pop in the pub on sunday at 2pm on the off chance you escaped for an hour.

Ian in Northampton at 15:39:03 Friday February 09 2001
UHH: I lived in Hornchurch - Grey Towers Avenue - just round the corner from where the Odeon used to be, and across from a huge great park whose name temporarily escapes me. My father taught at North Romford Comprehensive which, I understand, has now been demolished. Never lived in Basildon, though. I went there once, but it was closed. I was born in East Ham, which is my excuse for supporting Harry Redknapp's C&B - er - team, I guess... Truly, the world gets smaller snd smaller.... Adam: you're right - out in the sticks, you don't want to be relying on public transport or cabs.

Ian in Northampton at 15:34:56 Friday February 09 2001
Adam: I'd have thought so - I don't use taxis much myself, but Peterborough is a fair way from Rushden - perhaps 25-30 miles?

U.H.H at 15:28:21 Friday February 09 2001
[Adam]too fuckin' right! you obviously have never visited Milton Keynes, it's a drive to get anywhere. and when you do get there it's not worth it!

U.H.H at 15:22:24 Friday February 09 2001
[Adam]Also i am Essex born and bred[Hornchurch,Basildon,Romford then up to Bucks.]

Adam at 15:21:04 Friday February 09 2001
U.H.H , I've heard that when you are out in the sticks, they charge extortianate amounts for taxis. I hope you have a car and your woman drives.

U.H.H at 15:18:23 Friday February 09 2001
[Adam]Ł28 for a taxi anywhere is not reasonable, that's nearly a full tank!

U.H.H at 15:15:40 Friday February 09 2001
[Ian] will reveal adress if offer sucessful, dont want to jinx it!
so everyone's coming out of the woodwork.Apart from Paolo, do you think he suceeded with bic?

Adam at 15:03:14 Friday February 09 2001
Ian, any other humans.

Is Ł28 a reasonable price for a taxi from Rushden to Peterborough station?

C&B in Sweden at 15:03:08 Friday February 09 2001
Nuff said.

Ian in Northampton at 14:58:00 Friday February 09 2001
I'm reminded that this is how Alf's used to get on Friday afternoons...

Ian in Northampton at 14:57:18 Friday February 09 2001
Adam: any other whats? Others? It does seem to have been just me and UHH for a little while... Has anyone else got any house-buying stories?

Adam at 14:55:16 Friday February 09 2001
whoops just realised there arent any others on here

Adam at 14:53:51 Friday February 09 2001
How many others on here do not live in East London/Essex.

I have an offer accepted on a flat in New Barnet. I will be moving from Palmers Green, North London. The first time I have lived not in a London postcode. Although its still only zone 5 on the tube.

btw my girlfriend is at Rushden's ground as we speak.

Ian in Northampton at 14:50:33 Friday February 09 2001
UHH: Nah: I'm only allowed out Saturday evenings... Yeah, it's not the biggest pub in the world. The 'public bar' is a bit of a hole with projector TV for footie etc., juke box, pool table etc. That's where they do the live music - it can get very sweaty... The lounge bar's pretty pleasant - not usually that full (the pub was in a bad way twenty years ago and the villagers have long memories (as well as six fingers on their left hands)) so it's mostly only the desperate old codgers (like moi) who go in there. It's a good atmosphere, though. Where's the place you're making the offer on?

U.H.H at 14:41:12 Friday February 09 2001
It truly is a small world! we've been up there 3 times so far and like it.the pub's o.k? looked a bit small,we passed it on sunday but decided not to go in.
Decided to leave M.K, It's a bit of a dump. we will be up your way on sunday again, will you be in the pub?

Ian in Northampton at 14:24:52 Friday February 09 2001
Yup, it's Bozeat - centre of the known universe. If the house you're putting in an offer on is on a new estate, chances are it's immediately opposite our house or immediately behind it. Bozeat's OK: The Red Lion is a reasonable boozer with live music Friday and Saturday nights, a Spar/Post Office, its own Chinky, a newspaper shop, a decent junior school and more churches than you can shake a stick at. It's also one of the few places for miles around that has its own skateboarding half pipe - cool or what? And if the bright lights beckon, it's a) 15 minutes from J14 or J15 on the M1, and b) 25 minutes from Northampton, Bedford or MK. Houses five miles down the road in upmarket Olney, Bucks command a 25%+ price premium over houses in Bozeat, so it's not bad value.

U.H.H at 14:01:27 Friday February 09 2001
[Ian]So it is Bozeat? putting in an offer on a house this w/e.sure i dont know you.

Ian in Northampton at 13:50:18 Friday February 09 2001
UHH: you ARE Mahoolah! Or you're not the 'new bod' you claim to be. Or, in some strange cosmic coincidence, we actually know each other?

U.H.H at 13:50:04 Friday February 09 2001
[Ian]also thought Suker looked really good at that friendly,
What's happened to him? he supposed to fit again.

U.H.H at 13:40:25 Friday February 09 2001
[Ian]That little village would'nt happen to be Bozeat would it?
It was a cracking game at R&D, nice ground too,should be on for a repeat next season if we keep DR.M's

Ian in Northampton at 13:34:04 Friday February 09 2001
UHH: I was there too - it's a cute ground, isn't it? PdC was great... Unfortunately, it seems R&DFC are known as the ManUre of the Conference - pots of money etc. Looks like they'll come 2nd again this season, though. Wellingborough's OK: it's a bit of a hole, but the twon council are doing their best. I live in a village about 5 miles outside. Re: Mahoolah - a guy with what you could best describe as a thoroughly off-the-wall sense of humour: his contributions are greatly missed - by me, at any rate. TGoM: there's no law against ghosts posting, you know....

U.H.H at 13:26:08 Friday February 09 2001
What is it with HR and players over the 28 mark?

U.H.H at 13:24:04 Friday February 09 2001
[Ian]Im a new bod,dont know MAHOOLAH?.
I post even if i dont have a strong opinion.i might be moving near Wellingborough[What's it like?] we went to see the friendly against the Diamonds pre season.

The Ghost of Mahoolah at 13:09:15 Friday February 09 2001
I was buried alive beneath an avalanche of IT fault reports...

Whoopee - Harry's after another old man!! at 13:07:59 Friday February 09 2001
http://www.sky.com/sports/football/premier/westham/story11.htm

Ian in Northampton at 12:56:44 Friday February 09 2001
UHH: Never been away - I just rarely have opinions strong enough to feel the urge to post them on the site. Like my feeling that we're dooooomed...! You're not Mahoolah in another guise, are you? M of blessed memory was also from MK, but long time no hear...

U.H.H at 12:07:20 Friday February 09 2001
[Ian in N'TON]You're back!
I live in M.K.

Ian in Northampton at 11:39:39 Friday February 09 2001
Paolo: save the blades for Monday at 10:00pm.. We're dooooomed, I tell you - dooooomed. Haven''t I said this before...?

Kristian in elation (can i say that?) at 11:34:15 Friday February 09 2001
Its FRIDAY!!!!!!! Just got paid.
Lovely! And regardless of what pains I inflict on myselves, I`ll be able to watch WHU on monday. COME ON YOU IRONS!!!

C&B at 11:26:26 Friday February 09 2001
And what if Hartson and Stimac have a reenactment of their famous clash?

Or if the Welshman finds himself marked by the Craot as a tempting corner swings over?

I know who I fancy in both cases and it won't be the player in Claret and Blue this time.

U.H.H at 08:39:17 Friday February 09 2001
Morning chaps,
[Paolo]Dont do it mate,Women and West Ham intresting comparison,they can both make your heart sing, you feel fantastic the world is yours!![super sunday] Then the next minute they treat you like shit and still expect your undivided attention[the following two results].
Anyway Paolo cheer up were gonna stuff Cov 4/5-0 on Monday and then we'll all be walking around with our heads in the clouds.
[D.D]I thought i was the only one who was getting pissed off with Freddy eating humble pie all week and saying how he's a shit tackler.What happened to the 'Blood and Guts' element of our precious game,i dont recall SP crying when he ended up with a broken leg twice last season.
Also i think the Welsh lardarse will be well guarded by messers Dailly and Tihinen.