25th Nov
Jack Ripper wins cup
Ostensibly long dead vile stab-meister, Jack The Ripper has returned from beyond a range of hazy mountains to lay claim on what he says is rightfully his, the FA Cup... More...
Horrible rantings yield chaos from the deep
Deep sea fisherman the world over are basking in terror from today after the discovery of what they call the profanity squid. The enormous 60 metre tentacled upholder of decency is reputed to drag cursing sailors to their deaths lest little fishes and other water based wilderbeast be corrupted by their foul tongues. "Oh fouk!" said one cod fisherman shortly before he obtained the key to Davy Jones' locker.
Something found in acid-riddled den
The great acid lakes of Ontario have been attracted undue attention over the last few days as people fight to catch a glimpse of strange voices emerging from the stinking expanse. It began a week ago when local reporter, Gail Summers, heard something strange "Help me!" said a voice. "I'm stuck in this tree". Using all her expert powers of deduction she came to the conclusion that some kind of ghost had possessed the acid lake and was trying to find a body to bring a new reign of evil. Locals gasped in awe at the "Not there, up here - in the fouking tree!" rants and hurled rocks, only to flee in terror as they fizzed away into oblivion.
Missed pone
Maybe it was to be 'one' but once an error like that is induced we are in position to take it back.
Blattster! We take it back, leave!
