stargate season two

Season Two

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The Serpent's Lair

Teal'c the Terminator
Got to admire Sam's style really
Teal'c sings 'Monty Python' Always look on the bright side of life...
Of course it was an "I told you so"
I do love the way Hammond undermines Samuels at every available opportunity
On the not so bright side, they're coming to execute you
I wonder how many times they had to practice getting the gate to fire up at that exact point in Hammond's speech?
"Alpha site" Hammond should probably add 'and no, we're not taking the piss' at this point
It launched Samuels, save the cheers until it's actually hit something
Maybe they should record as well...
Daniel has a decidedly ‘Why are you giving this to me?’ look on his face when Sam gives him that machine gun thing
"Huge fireball in the night sky" how often is that good news?
The rest of SG-1 are up there somewhere. Having a damn good float
It's a terrible thing to be recognised galaxy-wide for your baldness. Tell that to Picard
Notice Sam’s completely given up being surprised that Daniel isn’t dead
So what exactly did they say to Senator Kinsey at this point? Nya ha ha! would probably be a good start. With 'told ya' coming a good second. ‘You prick’ would be an excellent third

In The Line Of Duty

Doesn’t the carved head on that stick that they begin the first shot of the episode with look just like Ming the Merciless?
I know that French kissing can be like having a slug in your mouth, but Sam actually did have one in hers. Yuch.
Goa’uldish, Goa’uld-like, Goa’uld-esque, what is the correct term?
Ooh, miaow Sam
How come Teal'c can't sense Jolinar?
Jack and Sam get into a “who’s going to blink first” contest.
Oh yeah, point a gun at her because that's going to make the grenade not explode
It’s Mary Ellen from ‘The Waltons’ isn’t it?
"Get it out of her" I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Out Of My Hair...
Is he wearing blusher or is it just me?
Did anyone else have a Queen moment here, with the “They will not let you go” “Let me go!” speech Sam has with both Jack and Daniel? Yep, me too
Well, that freaked Teal'c good and proper, and that doesn't happen very often
I really wouldn't want to be driven by someone who'd just had that done to them
That's a lot of effort to put into last words which assassin guy isn't going to repeat to anybody
Oh Jesus, Daniel. One of these days he's going to learn
The announcer lady calls the gateroom the "embarkation room" (so the perky tour guide in '2010' was right)
Sam just rocks Jack's world there
Only Daniel would remember not just to bring flowers but to bring a vase as well

Prisoners

The linguist fails to be of any use whatsoever
And yet again, SG-1 assume that the guy running from the law is innocent
Sam gets picked to be Linea’s bitch in two seconds flat. I don't think Linea should had bothered, Sam could probably have taken the big guy. Headbutting is an underused skill, I’m glad that Sam is making use of it.
I suppose Jack is right, and signs of weakness aren’t good in a prison, but neither is stumbling around half-blind, cannoning into burly inmates.
How come all alien chemicals are green and glowy? I can't think off hand of any actual chemicals that look like that
So they escape but they leave their feet behind? People believe this? Probably not, but it’s their only Oz reference in this episode, and it’s a good one.
That's not food, it's ready-mix cement
Poor SG9 have to clean up the diplomatic chaos that SG-1 routinely leave behind them.
Hammond clearly expected to be doing nothing more dangerous that minding the red phone, intergalactic travel wasn't in the job description Yeah, but I bet he was dying for an excuse
Why does Daniel stand in front of them? What’s the logic there? Daniel logic obviously
Hammond and the diplomatic guy try and confuse the judiciary into giving up SG-1. Notice that Hammond turns into Jack on his first trip through the Stargate.
Yes but what do his eyes see?
Did anybody else notice Daniel coming around a few minutes before his cue?
Daniel actually listens in the planning briefings?
I'm kind of surprised that Daniel didn't stay by the trough to make sure all of the other prisoners got a fair share
How did they actually do it? Spin it like the ‘Wheel of Fortune’?
Hammond is so pissed that SG-1 have escaped, he thought he'd finally got rid of them for good
Isn't Daniel sexy with his glasses pushing his hair back like that? Yeah, but it’s hard to find an instance when he’s not, really.
So she's only the destroyer of half a world then?
As Linea heads off to do battle with the vicious forces of Manilow
It’s like ‘Galaxy Quest’. It gets to 1 and stops

The Gamekeeper

That's a really cool shot of the gate from the side
So Jack is worried about snakes, and Daniel is worried about flowers. Trust me, when you’ve got bad hayfever you’d rather face the snakes. At least they don’t make you sneeze.
Jack isn't exactly filling the rest of his team with confidence here
I don’t know about real, but it was sissy
Nyaahhh!! Teal'c! Hair! Nyaahhh! Make it go away! Pretty much my reaction, but I had the misfortune to be eating when I saw this episode, so there were more choking noises. Good grief!
Is Sam freaking at her clothes or her cleavage?
No, you can't do that to Daniel!
Good choice of casting with the parents
Well, if you're dumb enough to stand under two tonnes of cover stone... Killed by a museum exhibit. What a way to go. Especially one that looks like a Star Trek prop.
Oh, that challenges the evil Zipacna for the silliest hat award. This is true quality – no only do you get Dwight Shultz, you get Dwight Shultz with a faux-British accent in a silly hat. Who can ask for more?
Yep we are obstinate, it's a quality we pride ourselves on
Depends what the movies were really This was my reaction, word for word, only I had a comma between were and really
I wonder what Sam and Teal'c's scenarios would be?
I so hope to God that isn't the real General Hammond
At what point did Kawalsky make Daniel laugh? In the movie he just yells at him a lot and tries to kill him and in the pilot he dies
People always make the same mistakes twice, major flaw of human nature
Daniel's propping his glasses up in his hair again...

Need

You can tell that Sam really covets that naquadah
Daniel is moving up a grade, this time he gets everyone into trouble instead of just himself
Why thieves? And if they are, why put them into the mine with what they presumably want to steal?
It really was unfortunate that in trying to escape they drop a ceiling on Daniel
The Sarcophagus needs oiling. Who do you suppose is in charge of that?
So in order to seduce Daniel, she puts more clothes on him. She's obviously not had a lot of experience with men. Daniel's "royal robes" are exactly the same colour as my graduation sash. Yick
And Teal’c is mining one-handed, showing how tough he really is.
Listen little deluded woman, Daniel is not your destiny. I may not be able to lay claim to him, but I'm not letting her have him
Daniel, you are going to have to watch that compassion, just look at the trouble it gets you into
Yes it is surprisingly difficult to kill Daniel, but then he has a weeble gene
"Feast?" as Jack is clearly considering cooking and eating Daniel at this point
Doesn't Daniel's hair look a mess when he's been in the sarcophagus? Proof positive that it might be able to bring you back from the dead, but even it can't solve the problem of split ends. Daniel has frenetic hair to show the state of his brain
Jolinar’s memories are turning out to be dead convenient
Wow, they could have been given a bath before being sent home
Whoa, Daniel, Daniel threw Teal'c across the room
Uh oh, Daniel's loose
Bless the boy, he's coming apart at the seams

Thor's Chariot

This project at the beginning, what use is it? Even if they know a Goa'uld ship is coming, what's the benefit, other than more time to go "aarrrrgghhhh!"?
If Jack is Mr. Positive, what are the names of the rest of SG-1?
As Sam casts around for a reason not to be left behind. Sam wasn’t actually responsible for any of the crap that happened on the last mission to Cimmeria, but she knows that if she lets the guys go by themselves she’ll never see them again.
"She never doubted" although Gerwin clearly did
With all their highly advanced technology, the Goa’uld summon each other with hunting horns? Just for dramatic effect you understand
For a warrior, Gerwin is clumsy getting her sword out
Notice how Daniel has the little gun and gets caught up in the bush while Sam and Gerwin professionally ambush their teammates
Oh so luckily they go against all known custom and don't bury the grave goods, just so Sam doesn't have to exhume the hand device
Silly Sam. Looking at a hand device must be like looking down the barrel of a loaded gun with your finger on the trigger
Moment of Searing Eye contact TM
Daniel is like Terry Pratchett's wizards. Signs that say “Do not touch under any circumstances’ are like a magnet
See, Thor's a real god, no horns (you probably need to read the stuff on 'Red Sky' to get the significance of that)
Thor was not a wrathful God? What were the thunderbolts for? Tickling the naughty?
'Knightmare', anyone?
Daniel puts Thor on 'pause'. I’m amazed that worked
Slightly worrying that an ancient Greek could have solved that, we've had knowledge of pi for about 3000 years, not a totally reliable sign of advanced technology
Could they not just have poked at all the shapes to see if there was anything under them? Jack would have done, part of his 'find out if it works by kicking it really hard' approach
Thor’s a bit of a disappointment in his original form as gods go
Gerwin’s pretty blasé for someone who’s just met her God
How will the hammer know it's Teal'c?

Message In A Bottle

They get to be astronauts! Cool! (So speaks the inner child that was raised on “Space Camp”)
What is that on the back of the astronaut suits? A portable mattress so you can fall on your back and have a kip whenever the mood strikes you?
‘Takes me back’ Back?
It glowed! And nobody saw! They really should keep an eye on glowing things in this series.
Daniel chokes on his foot.
The wonderful appearance of pissy queen!Daniel, "Oops. Hey the artefact"
Why are they going on a mission to a totally primordial world? What could there possibly be for SG-1, a first contact team, to be interested in?
Jack just doesn't care about the artefact does he? Just so long as it's scholarly
The artefact clamours for attention
Poor Daniel, so close to ordering the military around on his own authority
Oh God Jack. That really is a very impressive way to get injured in the line of duty.
Sam can surely understand why Jack wants it shot?
Is it just me or is Daniel looking particularly pretty during this ep?
Daniel's right, the NID will want it more if it's dangerous
Again the SGC engineers refuse to be bullied into working faster
Okay, here's a question, he calls Teal'c "sir", so does Teal'c have a military equivalent rank that states who he can and can't boss around?
Hang on, they said this thing was eating through Jack’s uniform. Not that I really want to see RDA naked, but I would have thought that you two would have been a bit miffed. Well, it's certainly a missed opportunity
Slightly radioactive? Surely it is or it isn’t.
They look like baby Daleks
My god, it's after the base
"Kill it" obviously that's the first option, well before trying to reason with it, or finding out what it wants
Teal'c is taking the piss, good for him
Oh crap
The artifact is listening
Hello? In an emergency, always take the stairs.
Teal'c's quite fond of that welder
Poor, poor Graham. As the boy gasps cos everybody knows how he feels about Carter.
"It's trying to communicate" I told you it was listening
"Get in the way." Hey! It wasn't Jack's fault he got stabbed through the shoulder and pinned to the wall, it's not like he dived in front of it
Jesus that's scary
Their reboot is a darn sight faster than mine, and I’m sure their computer has more systems than mine has
Ow that had to hurt.
His job done, Jack can now pass out.
My god that's a good episode. It is isn't it? I've never been that fond of it before, but the more I see it, the more I enjoy it

Family

How did Bra'tac know to wait until they’d decided to open the iris? Mice, methinks…
Teal'c impressively doesn't react with a "huh?"
Apophis is back from his dead break
"Teal'c is right" Teal'c is talking about himself in the third person
Something nicely incongruous about the robes and the gas masks
Daniel has a little perspective on this, considering he cheated on his wife a few weeks ago
Family show Jack, family show
Somebody gag that child
I want a house with secret passages
Trust is a very brittle thing
Why did they not bring Teal'c's wife with them to get Rya'c? Because they didn't need her in the middle of a firefight
“This is a trap” Yet they still stand around for ten minutes while they argue.
Jack trying really subtly not to listen in on Teal'c's private conversation then
You've got to admire his guts for trying to brain Teal'c with that chair
The obnoxious boy yells “Aphophis loves me!” and I wonder if there are hymns that little Jaffa have to sing, like “Apophis wants me for His sunbeam” Oh yes, and you know there are actions as well
It’s not surprising that with so many silly hats the boy gets confused
I'm distresses that they are going to electrocute a child no matter how stubborn and obnoxious. Actually, I think all child-care professionals should be issued with zats so you can stun them when they get too annoying (and if you have to kill them you don't have to waste time hiding the body) I second that motion

Secrets

They're letting him go alone with only Teal'c?
Daniel's fabulous flowing nightshirt
I notice Daniel doesn’t say that it’ll be many seasons because he keeps getting distracted by interesting archaeological finds
Poor Daniel, Apophis knocked up his wife
Wouldn't you recognise your own father, even from behind? I recognised him and we're not even related
This whole episode should be retitled Poor Daniel
Love Jack's idea of lunch, two glasses of something
I love the communal "we know something you don't know" look that those three have got going
General Carter is right, their cover stories need serious work
That's got to be heartbreaking - not telling your Dad that you can travel through space
"Colonel Jack O'Neill" "I'm not sure" doesn't bode well for approaching senility
All they have to do is put 'pregnant' hormones in her body - the pill?
"When the pain comes, you have to breathe" breathing is important at any point
Jack's shades are excellent
Yeah, the film O'Neil was an asshole
Fantastic edit when Teal'c fires that zat
Doesn't it look like Jacob's been impaled by the Monument?
Does anybody on TV have a functional relationship with their parents? Brady Bunch excluded of course. (Although I’d be interested in the psychological damage that such relentless cheerfulness could cause)
"I'm here" nice and all, but I think she'd prefer an epidural
Ooh, budget increased this season so they could do the CGI completely retractable helmets on the Horus guards, instead of the ones that just clunk open
Problem solving with Jack. Well Jack didn't solve this problem, the question is "was it an accident accident, or was it an Accident?"
Bit of an odd ride this episode, I always think it's going to end after they get their medals, but there's still a whole other part to go
Daniel was among the warriors that destroyed the ships of Apophis, he just wasn't one of them
For those of you (like me) watching this on Channel 4, or good old S4C, when the bullets don't work, Jack throws a knife through Heru-Ur's hand (through the shield) and you get a cool gory looking close-up
All that forced kneeling must really hurt her knees
Where did she get the stupid hat from?

Bane

Perhaps the orange goo are the inhabitants
Get it off, get it off, get it off!
They used to make 'My Little Ponies' with wings that flapped like that
Ooh, a big stoic bald Teal'c bug
Now, that's in-flight entertainment
Shouldn't this be Daniel bitten?
Euch, this episode is kinda grim. The writers have seen 'Alien' and combined it with an irrational fear of house flies
Scientists always call things 'subjects' it's how you make sure you get impartial experiments
Maybourne wants Teal'c
Love the way Jack asks Hammond's permission to beat the crap out of him and Hammond briefly considers it
Is it necessary to chain him? Cos you know they aren't going to hold Teal'c the bush kangaroo. "What's that boy? Daniel's fallen down a mineshaft?"
It’s never good to be the driver in these things
Poor Junior! Just dumped like that, after all they've been through!
How phallic are the Goa’uld? If I were Daniel, I’d be pretty squeamish about touching it
Canine units? They're sending dogs through the gate now?
How many times has that striking an officer thing been used? I like Jack's version though
A lot of people say "I'd rather die", when it comes down to it though, opinions change pretty quickly
East side of Colorado Springs?
How are they going to catch a bug? With a big paper cup and a magazine? Nah, just a really big can of fly spray
Small child alert, although she's not too bad
I wouldn't have given him my chocolate
Oh, nice, Maybourne in disguise using unmarked white vans. Not black. Almost Machiavellian. You know, Maybourne looks a lot older and more haggard in these early episodes. Running from the secret services must agree with him
"I ain't seen nobody" talk about plausible deniability. I do love her reason though
Mystical cop ESP again
Jack pops in, rambles and unsurprisingly saves the day. Jack O'Neill medical researcher
Nice fringedweller logic to end on "How else would she defend herself?" The man has a point
Teal'c showing way too much enthusiasm as he dashes off to play with the big water guns

The Tok'ra pt I

"Found something"? What was she looking for?
Uncomfortable with the image of Carter having visions somehow
Why the navy hat?
If Hammond has known Jacob for a long time, then did he know Sam before she joined the SGC?
"More like your father" was that meant to be a compliment?
The Oz joke seems lost on Teal'c, which is strange, as you'd have thought Jack would have forced him to watch the movie by now. Quite fond of the picture of Teal'c in the little gingham dress and pigtails though
Stealth Tok'ra
Jack does a quick head count
"We are not a Goa'uld" well, that was convincing
Jack says "take me to your leader" I'm with the crew of Red Dwarf on this
What's Daniel going to do, hand over his boonie hat? Or his trowel?
How many times has Teal'c pulled tunnel duty, and who do you have to piss off to get it?
Tok'ra dress sense leaves a lot to be desired. Obviously the Tok'ra all have to make their own clothes and the women are upholding some good old stereotypes by being the only ones able to sew. This is why they get the slinky dresses and they men have to dress like slightly ragged Jawas
Wow, Jack and Faust, Renaissance drama metaphor. Let me reiterate that ‘Wow’. Wow
What happens if the symbiote and host support different teams?
Jolinar was a him? Martouf is gay?
Jolinar is a ‘she’ and Sam doesn’t know? How could she not know? I know I’m a girl all the time!
Men, honestly, always got an ulterior motive
Nice, her first male contact and Daniel appears on cue. Daniel ruining an otherwise very beautiful moment there
Bathing must be a pain if there are no doors or partitions
I wonder how many feet of Tok'ra tunnel they've actually got on set?
It's not disgust, it's fear

The Tok'ra pt II

I love the kitchen counter with obvious glued on bits that Jack and Daniel lean casually on after pleading for their freedom
For once Jack’s red-neck xenophobic impulses are right - they are very Goa’uld like
That Tok'ra woman must have been waiting outside, or that dress must let her move really quickly
Two go back the rest remain, sounds reasonable to me
Actually they do sort of do want him to take messages to gods
I have to say, Jacob's taking all these revelations very well
Because you know, there's always a catch. Yes, the catch really is something else
Can Jacob function without the drips?
Jacob puts his finger on the Vancouver problem and the writers give the standard explanation
This evacuation obviously
Cool, the tunnels are eating themselves
Big ugly motherships
It's mildly irritating how they've had to make Jacob look stupid in order to explain the Goa'uld/Tok'ra thing to the audience again
Cushy acting job, lying down all day - only coma victims have it better
If the symbiotes have gender, doesn’t that make things confusing? Do joined people have gender issues with men waxing their legs and women scratching and farting in public?
Your future soul mate will be the ideal person to sort you out when you're ill and not judge you
As I'm sitting here knocking back the codeine tablets at an upsetting rate, I've decided, I want a symbiote too
Even in moments of extreme emotional distress, Sam's mascara remains intact
From what we know about the Goa'uld, you'd have thought that they would take pleasure from remembering their host's face when they were implanted. I think it's more likely that they don't do it in case some enterprising potential host bites down at a crucial moment
That was an ickle Goa'uld
What is it with Tok'ra women and Jack O'Neill?
Just put the table on wheels and push it!
Ok guys, no time to trip!
They really should pad that ramp the amount of times they come crashing through the gate
Pushy isn't she? "Come Selmac." Heel!

Spirits

They are always poking him with holes
I hope Jack got to keep the arrowhead.
So they can’t have looked too far for indigenous people
Cool how everybody suddenly speaks English
"They're with the Spirits" ah the inadequacies of language
"Concerned about..." God no, otherwise they wouldn't be working in the Pentagon. What’s that about history being cyclical?
Interesting point made throughout this episode and others, but it's most obvious in this one. The message, don't underestimate a people; just because they are technologically simplistic and trusting doesn't mean that they're stupid. Although the SGC fall for this on a regular basis
That vanishing trick is very cool and useful
I can't believe Jack has to get a girl to cock his pistol for him. Something in that sentence doesn't sound right does it?
The aliens actually look alien, this is fairly unusual. I love the way their gills move when they breathe
He must feel awfully silly bowing to a wolf
"Won't lie to you," any more than he has already that is
How come the wolf doesn't have to cross it's paws to make people disappear?
Tonani really is desperate to get off that base isn't he?

Touchstone

I would have kept one of the SG-1 team as a hostage to make sure they came back
"14:03 hours: Sgt Siler sneezes on stargate. No apparent damage"
It seems to work fine when they put it on the statue. Maybe they should have nicked that as well
"Son, do you know what colour this phone is?" Brilliant
I wonder what fake documents Hammond sent them with
I like Teal'c's culture as a way to disconcert people
"This gate is plastic" it's 2001, they're all plastic. You're telling me that nobody but Sam thought to check that the gate wasn't plastic?
I wonder if that is the problem with people in high command- thin air
Why didn't Carter start triangulation as soon as the MALP was through the gate? More to the point, why couldn't they just dial earth from the SGC and track the vibrations like they did in 'Solitudes', (or 'Watergate' for that matter)? The NID probably haven't had time to install all the dampening equipment that the SGC have got
"Another American" implying that if there are other nationalities present they can be gunned down with impunity
I really want to know military sign language
After all that snow, and the sudden return of the sun, they're going to have some terrible flooding on Medrona
That last speech of Maybourne's reminds me strangely of Methos' great lines though

A Matter Of Time

Very cool FX at the start. That looks like a Star Trek opening sequence.
I think she should have just stuck with the apple. Poor Jack, Sam should have stopped with the apple explanation. Never start a metaphor you can't finish
Jack obviously thinking “Oh God, what’s Daniel done now?”
Surely it shouldn’t matter whose SG team is dying a horrible death, just that one is?
Obviously the physics here is skewed, because I remembered some vague stuff about red-shifting at about the same time that Sam started to get excited about it. There is no way that I would get physics right, so they must be wrong.
Negative, no, nada, non, nein, na, nyet – all meaning no.
They really should stump up the cash to fit Sam with a technobabble filter, just to stop Jack from having a nervous breakdown.
Is she sure she wants to follow a suggestion of Jack's? Especially when they have no idea what it’s going to do?
Notice that Sam sends Jack to do all the dangerous stuff.
Ooops. Reboot the universe, anyone?
Ah, the first appearance of the lovely Major Davis, the man who's job it is to tell General Hammond all the bad news the President doesn't have the balls to tell him in person
Where did Hammond get a dress uniform from?
Do the Pentagon freak if they don’t get an hourly report from the mountain? If someone was on their break when the call was supposed to be made, does that mean that a hundred armed soldiers converge on the base?
That wasn't the most professional patient lift ever
I am reliable informed by someone with A level physics that the physics in this episode is crap, however to the layman it all seems plausible, although some of it could just be lies to children. Admittedly they do cover their backsides with the "this goes against everything we know" argument, but still, it's a cop out and it ruins what is otherwise a really cool episode
Don't understand it therefore blow it up. Typical government
Using a doughnut as a prop to explain the laws of physics
Does the glass go through the iris or just stick to it? It just looks like it's sucked through
Because of the whole time dilation thing, Jack would actually have more than 20 seconds to get away from the explosion
Daniel Jackson's "Yes ma'am" line. Nice to know that they're making good use of the stuff they stole from the people in 'Spirits'

The Fifth Race

If Daniel's waiting for the penny to drop with those lot, he's going to be stood in the briefing room all day
Jack knowing the down side of announcing your presence very loudly to a possible enemy that you can't see
Love the thing that comes out of the wall. Very cool
Could none of them be trying to you know, help Jack when the big thing grabs him by the ears? What are they waiting for?!
Has Jack got a date or something? He seem awfully eager to leave
Great bit of pantomime
What is that thing on his crotch?
"Preparing to dance" oh so Jack does have a date
The thing where Jack starts dropping odd words of foreign into normal sentences sounds contrived at first
Daniel has a great room
Yes Jack, it's very odd
God just think what would happen if our fringedweller brains operated at 90%. Frankly I'd be happy if mine was operating at 9%, which is more than it seems to do at the moment
RDA looking beautiful and broody
I have issues with base 8 maths 10=8 my arse 10=10 that's why it's 10 That’s also why we’re not astrophysicists. In fact, in base 8 maths 12=>10 so there
Jack didn't get that longed for Lego set as a child and is making up for it now
Daniel's vengeance on the pen pushers
Something that consistently amazes me, how does the computer manage to adapt so quickly and display the eighth symbol? I know my laptop has nothing on a military mainframe, but it never does anything automatically unless it's something that I specifically don't want it to do
The answer to Hammond's question, this plan obviously
We have little grey men
Hear that thud. Ow
Jack assures the Asgard that they are thought of as good guys as if that would matter
I wonder if they know that we have a little rubber inflated version of them - also, would they assume that we have them for some nefarious sexual purpose?
"We are a curious race" is that curious as in elephants child or curious as in bizarre? 'Cause either works

Serpent's Song

Love Daniel's sexy centerfold sprawl across the stargate steps, particularly next to Jack's (and Sam's) very manly 'here are my genitals' pose
"Holy buckets"? Is that what Jack said? And if so why?
"Help me." Seriously, what are the odds?
There's good old smug!Teal'c again
I thought that the host of a Goa'uld was suppressed, destroyed or disintegrated by the Goa'uld. Nah, that's just what they want you to think
"Gods have no one to pray to"
Apophis can comfort himself with the knowledge that even though he's dying, he still hasn't smudged his eyeliner
I have serious issues with their i.d. on Sokar, it's all on the mythology page if you want to go and track it down
Daniel attempts to exact petty revenge as well as find Sha're, this would work better if Apophis didn't realise this
It takes Daniel long enough to think of dialing out to stop Sokar dialing in, and why does nobody else think of it? They know this
I'd never thought of that, how does Sokar expect them to send Apophis to him if he's using the stargate?
Martouf couldn't have mentioned this before?
Why did the SGC command not give the Tok'ra a signal GDO along with the box at the end of 'Tok'ra pt II' instead of now?
Interesting facts, Apophis is on his dead break, and the Tollan are friends with the Tok'ra

Holiday

As we descend into pantomime
It's a super bit of makeup they've done there, Ma'chello really looks nothing like MS In fact, I had no idea it was him. Well, I did guess, but not for anything MS did, more something in the smug storytelling gave it away
No wonder he’s always on the brink of horrible death, he’s far too trusting
Surely slightly dazed and out of it is Daniel's natural state?
Yep, from someone who knows, electric shocks do take it out of you (I had fun and games with electric fencing about two weeks ago)
Good bit of acting from MS, he even shuffles like Ma’chello in Daniel’s body
Daniel really does dress like a geek when he's out of uniform. Much better just to keep him in the nice neutral fatigues
Ma'chello obviously
"Let us feast together and celebrate our strangeness" working definition of a Fringedweller St Valentines Day Massacre
"1, 2, 3" uh oh. That's a definite 'oops' Sam could have hours of fun torturing them though
Christopher Judge must be dead chuffed to finally be allowed to pull an expression
Don't American's have to sign their credit card slips? It seems really easy for other people to use their cards, and should the woman behind the counter be serving him if he doesn't know who's card he's carrying? Or even what one is? What does she care? She’s got the card
Now usually I'm a big fan of keeping food and sex separate, but the image of Daniel Jackson and a Hot Fudge Sunday is just too good to pass by
Jack has hair fear
I wonder how long RDA had to practice until he learnt to do the one eyebrow thing?
Machello's actually kind of mean. You tend to think of him as sort of cute and well-meaning because he looks like Daniel, but he's actually a very unpleasant (if entirely justified) man
My favourite bit, musical bodies. I've been impressed by Sam a lot over the years, but never more so than when she manages to work all this out without a piece of paper and lots of little arrows
Random remark. Am I the only person who feels the need to roar back at the MGM lion?

One False Step

Jack's right, it is really cool
"Don't indicate any movement" they could be playing musical statues
Carter obviously had model planes as a child
Actually it looked like a sculpture, but hey
Daniel's allergic to this planet
Jack should look more carefully, I saw clothing
Why is Jack asking Daniel if they're friendly? Surely out of all the team it is clear Daniel has the least developed survival instinct?
Teal'c smiled, this is scary
Daniel striking fear into the heart of a nation with a single sneeze
Ware! Mime! Mime!
They are painting on Daniel, that's nice
I love Daniel's UAV impression. Very accurate
Should Daniel be rubbing that stuff off? If the people put it on him to communicate, wouldn't it be rude?
Why would Daniel be communicating with dogs?
Yes it is something to worry about. Or that was just really poor timing
Surely it's possibly for something to be known and understood, yet still be cause for concern
"The damage is already done" that's encouraging from Janet
The alien is trying to talk to the ultrasound
Why didn't they take two, one sick, one well for comparison? I think they were probably trying to freak out as few of them as possible, also how would they know that their comparison subject was normal?
They know that these plant things grow though, because the UAV crashed into one
Ooh, Jack giving out sarcasm
"Plant boy"?
Jack and Daniel arguing like six year olds
First you have they vagaries of the English language, then you have men trying to express their feelings for each other in the English language. This is so funny I could watch it for weeks
I think Janet was a little disappointed about not getting to do the exploratory surgery. I feel that in Jack’s case, this would have required microsurgery
Is there any way for Teal'c to get that off his fingers without betraying his cool exterior?
It's not that difficult a concept. I don't think they needed Sam, Daniel and Hammond to do the exposition
Sam needs a pet

Show And Tell

It's an Ewok
Hammond really should have been paying more attention to the gate if he failed to see someone walk through it
That's an auspicious start
No threat but he's weak? Surely that should be no threat and he's weak. Watch out! He's slightly malnourished!
"Your mother" Jack has a quick panic as he tries to figure out exactly who this kid's parents are...
Who is Mother (I hope there's no Pink Floyd involved)? Is one of us mad, cause I can't see her
One time? Oh come on, Teal'c's pulled Jack's arse out of the fire much more often than that
"Disturbed" could they send Junior for counseling? Can't you just see it on the little couch?
It is Mother in the Pink Floyd sense. Mother's after Teal'c
Mother is impatient so she throws a fireball at them
"Theories? Suggestions?" Piece of plywood and a few nails to board up that hole?
As Charlie picks up Jack's mannerisms
"If it is there"? What happened to "there is a Reetou in that room"?
How come the Tok'ra isn't all woozy too?
Yet another triumph for the gateroom's impact-proof glass
Whoa, and good shot Teal'c
Rubbish, they've dimmed the lights so it looks more dramatic on TV!
Rothman? I'm assuming that's just some soldier with the same name
Daniel distracts at a critical moment
Well, the cleaning crew have certainly got a job on. What gets out invisible dead Reetou gloop anyway?
The critically ill kid can walk up the ramp on his own?
That is the first TV kid who actually came across as endearing, instead of just annoying and saccharine

1969

Love the way Jack's machismo has to cover his lack of knowledge "we know that"
Surely shooting anything at a missile is a bad idea?
I would have thought in a top secret facility, anonymity was positively encouraged
Why aren’t holding areas bugged? In 1969 and in the present day?
Oh dear, it seems that a lot of knowledge is a dangerous thing – Daniel, just because you can speak Russian it doesn’t mean that you should. Especially in Cold War era America! Daniel falls victim to one of the classic blunders, third after 'never enter into a land war in Asia' and 'never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line'. Never answer in Russian when the American military ask if you're a Soviet spy
James T. Kirk would have been known to anyone with a life in 1969
You’ve got to love Jack screwing with the mind of Bob. Particularly for the delayed effect in 1977 when Bob finally gets to see 'Star Wars'
I'm fond of "where there's a will there's an or"
How did he arrange it?
Jack had better hope that what he’s just done doesn’t get him court martialed
Just to make Jack feel even older, I wasn't even born in 1969, in fact I don't even think my parents were married by then
Teal'c wisely not taking the Claudette Colbert route to hitching a lift
Is it Woodstock they very nearly go to?
Do people in fatigues really seem likely to have a problem with the establishment? What is she smoking?
"We're at war with Canada?" thinks Michael, "I missed that"
"Someday I gotta get me a plane"
How can Christopher Judge keep a straight face in that get up? Considering some of the situations that Teal'c has kept a straight face in, the afro shouldn't present that much of a problem.
I quite like Daniel's white polo neck, although you'll notice that RDA has clearly pulled executive producer privileges so he can get the cool outfit
What a scary thought – a SG-1 road trip. Can you hear Jack and Daniel? “Are we nearly there yet?”
Something that always amazes me about 'Stargate'. The whole premise of this episode, not to mention the science, is really, really silly but somehow this doesn't make the episode any less brilliant
Yet another couple of people for whom 'Star Wars' has been ruined, and possibly 'E.T.'
Special awards should go to the hairdresser for creating authentic-looking German hair for Daniel. Unfortunately, creating an authentic German accent for Daniel seems to have proved more of a problem. Clearly, though he can speak 23 languages he can’t fake a decent accent
How did Jack know which part of the sun to look at?
Handy instant ramp
I love the idea of jump starting the Stargate
One of these days, Jack's 'close enough' attitude is going to get someone killed
At what point did Sam find out what time it was in the future so she could tell Cassandra in the past?
How did General Hammond not fall over laughing when he saw the outfits?
Sparky!?
Does Jack ever actually pay Hammond back?

Out Of Mind

My God! Gratuitous male nudity on SG-1!
The doctor's bedside manner sucks
Two time travel episodes in sequence? Bad planning there.
Wow! Did they microwave them out?
In 80 years they haven't redecorated? Or built a new ramp?
A problem with this sort of show is that the characters “remember” clips lifted from earlier episodes that they cannot actually have seen with their own eyes. Also, you can see the change in Jack’s hair colour. However, when introducing people to the show, they do handily recap two seasons for you, so you don't have to show them crap yet important episodes like 'Enigma'
The Nox would have to be invisible with hair like that
Did they film this episode at the beginning of season three? Because RDA has gone grey and MS has footballer hair
Oh dear, Daniel is having fringe problems in this episode. It actually distracts from the wet and naked image.
Why on earth has Hathor cut Daniel's hair?
How come Hathor's guards didn't whack Teal'c?
Oh God, those ******* corridors again. The cast must feel so ridiculous running up and down 18 feet of corridor all day. (That’s if the premise of the show isn’t ridiculous enough for them!)
It’s lucky that the hapless Goa’uld doctor bloke was exactly Jack’s size, wasn’t it? And isn’t it strange that Sam had to wander round in a silver sheet for most of the episode until she managed to find some miraculously fitting clothes? Humph. Definitely should have forced Jack to amble in a silver sheet for at least a scene
I would have thought that when Jack hits the guy who's with Sam it would have made a noise
Love the expression on Jack's face when he realises Sam is naked under that blanket
Can Teal'c not drop his SGC jacket on the table instead of on the floor?

Stargate Index