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back to episodes 9-15

Storyteller

It’s the We’re In England music. I’m guessing that this is Giles’ house - and I’d be very wrong!
Ok, not in England but Andrew is trying to be English
I like the pipe. The pan round to Andrew in pipe and slippers was hilarious. Andrew, the bizarre and unnecessary cross between Hugh Heffner and Roald Dahl
Didn’t there used to be a programme called ‘Story-teller’ that always used to start off like this and then go into the story proper? All the affectations that Andrew is using seem familiar somehow.
What’s with Andrew’s stupid pronunciations? If he keeps using ‘Vam-pyres’ I may have to do something violent.
Anya, you never walk in on a teenage boy in the bathroom. That way leads much ickiness.
Andrew has a point there, there should be some kind of documentary record for future slayers. Damn, I’m being a historian again. The historian in me agrees with recording things for posterity. And I’ve just read Tobin’s comment saying exactly the same thing. Talk about great minds thinking alike!
Anya seems to like kinky normally.
I love the queue of potentials with washbags in the bathroom. The first rule of sharing a house, figure out what time of day you all shower, how long you take and what time you have to be done by so you can get to work/lectures. My 2nd year - 7 people, one bathroom. Could take some planning, especially on the one morning we all had early starts! I missed Halls at that point.
He’s got the whiteboard out again! Andrew is much better at the artistic representation of the current crisis than Giles. He should be in charge of the potential’s induction programme from now on.
The ‘Idiot’s guide to Sunnydale, the Hellmouth and the Slayer’ somewhat pointless, but amusing all the same. Why bother with previouslies when you can have Andrew do it? Priceless!
‘Some Circumstances’? I believe it was called Andrew.
“Very mobile for blind people” - That is a very good point. Why didn’t one of us make it?
Low fat milk: Evil. None of those girls looks like they need that low fat milk, with their slayer metabolisms and all.
You'd think the women of command central, who effectively work nights, would get to sleep in
Poor Xander, he must be feeling hard done by if manipulative praise from Andrew has him grinning
Considering no one is actually going to work, how are they going to pay for more raisin bran?
God, Amanda is ugly.
I love the glamourous-looking character introduction sequences. The soft focus shots cracked me up.
“Face of an Angel,” Unfortunately, attitude of a self absorbed egomaniac.
Why in Andrew's fantasy does Spike have his shirt off?
Scary as it is, I'm with Buffy. This is idiotic, that slayer's identity is supposed to be secret for a reason, namely that the less the demons know about the slayer, the easier it is for her to kill them
I love the fact Andrew is as unimpressed with the ‘inspiring speeches’ as we are. Previouslies that make sense, editing out Buffy's moralising... I'm starting to like this episode
A villain yes, but not terribly super
The goggles on Sidekick!Jonathan and Warren are very funny.
Thank-you trio! I have been trying to point out the potential problems of being Magneto for ages but no one would listen.
Oh, I’ve missed the Troika.
Nah, she needs another ten minutes at least. I usually fast-forward through those bits
Willow looks bored. And Andrew just said exactly what I did. Should I be worried?
I wouldn't be as worried about the mirror saying I was fat as much as I would be worried that the mirror was talking to me in the first place
Well he’s either hurt or he’s saluting in a really individual way.
One rock out of three, not a bad ratio for a headteacher.
“The worst that can happen” - No, the worst that can happen is they end this series with some kind of loop that takes us all back to the beginning.
Oh gross, he actually exploded! That's it, Sunnydale High's last cleaning lady just quit
And annoying, don’t forget she’s annoying.
None of us knows why Dawn was the key either, Andrew, I wouldn’t worry.
Here’s an idea: Stop building things on the Hellmouth!
"What makes now so special?" Well, you remember the whole thing with the ultimate evil..?
Relate/Andrew, Andrew/Relate I can’t tell the difference.
Why can't evil energy keep my floor dirt free?
Teens already are monsters and victims. Trust me, I know.
Running to catch the bus naked is a nightmare, not a dream. Unless it’s someone else running to catch the bus naked, then it’s funny.
Those things didn’t look like vamps, Buffy, they looked more like Orcs. Still, a legitimate worry I suppose.
That would be thousands Buffy
That's absolutely true. Okay, Buffy may not have been technically evil, but she's been an utter bitch for the past seven years. “I’ve never been evil”- Well lets see there was locking your friends in a basement, being possessed by an evil spirit, leading Xander on just to make Angel jealous, using Spike, not to mention the cheerleading and wanting to be Homecoming queen.
Why do really serious cataracts have to mean someone is evil?
That’s it Buffy, concuss him some more.
That pig is still down there?
"God, I hope that's not a student." Love the way they don't even bother to check anymore
This programme really doesn’t need us.
“Merry-go-round of rotating knives” - Now I have playground fear.
Possessed students. Isn’t that a given?
Glowing seal, this can't be good
Somewhere in Mexico Not giving anything away there with the place name are they?
I have it on good authority that you can see both the cheese and the Cheese Man from ‘Restless’ appear in the dreams. I’ve not gone back to check yet, but just the thought cracks me up.
They packed pyjamas when they escaped to Mexico?
There’s something very endearing about Jonathan and Andrew.
Andrew and Jonathan, like Eric and Ernie except less competent and bringing less sunshine
I cannot cope with this much material.
A collapsible sword. How functional could that be?
What would Andrew do with a donkey? Maybe he's having that burro/burrito confusion
Both Andrew and I have similar expectations as to what being a God entails. Oh, I love the ‘god’ fantasy, that was hilarious. Where were the dancing Schnauzers! Did you see the unicorn run by in the background? I think that was the point I lost the battle to stay upright while laughing.
Eww, I even keep the cat-food fork separate
They didn’t notice that knife in the knife drawer?
Usually the languages sound pretty believable, but Twowarick?
So Andrew didn’t think about reading the ancient wording before he stabbed someone whilst standing over the Hellmouth seal? He is a born Scooby.
“Die Cheerleaders” - Well the First has won me over.
The marching band did that? Things have gotten out of hand.
Sexual tension between Principal Wood and Spike? I’m not convinced. I thought it was more along the lines of ‘You killed my mother, prepare to die!’ (I love that film)
I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who feels the need to narrate their life
Wow, Wood gets to attack his students!
And that is why we had to lock away our hockey sticks.
I did wonder why they didn’t bring Willow as well - she’s pretty powerful. Wouldn’t it have been useful?
So that’s how they make the bringers? Ick.
Heh. They just showed an Ad for ‘Darkness Falls’ which has Emma Caulfield in. Fighting a ‘tooth fairy’. Not at all cashing in on the Buffy connection then?
I for one am thrilled Spike took the chains down, that's something I have no wish to even think about
They’ve tried the ‘moving on’ sex before and it led to engagement.
Not fair, Wood gets to use a stick with nails in it! The one classroom accessory every teacher should have
Okay, we never got taught that in CDT
Teenagers with demonic strength, great, that's all we need
“She knows she’ll win because there is no alternative” - The fact that her opponents are blind also probably boosts the confidence.
The student minions were kind of pathetic. Watch that one scramble away!
But the blood that really awoke it was Spike's wasn't it? Who cut him? I can't remember
I liked the fact that Andrew was starting to face up to what he’d done, but the method was a tad on the cheesy side, wasn’t it?
That is a really wussy seal if it can be closed by a tear. Cry? That was it? Buffy didn’t have to get Andrew to own up to himself, she could have told him that George Lucas was scripting the next Star Wars film...
Wouldn’t it be a good idea to bury it as well?
Principal Ever Hopeful
I have a sneaking suspicion that Andrew might be one of the few who does survive. He's got too much tie-in potential for them to kill him. I can see the comic series now...
I can’t decide if that was a damn fine episode or not
Oh! What did the mutant enemy logo say? What, no Grr, Argh? I creased up again at that. I love it when they change the little monster.

Lies My Parents Told Me

They should just put up a notice saying “Watch the last 6 series” instead of bothering with the previouslies.
Aha! A dark and stormy night. Snoopy would be proud.
Spike doesn’t look right in a short jacket.
I assume that Spike and Nikki (the Slayer) are fighting in Central Park. It’s unfortunate that they actually showed her in the clip they used from ‘Fool for Love’, as now it’s obvious that they’re not the same actress!
Good fight/dance between Nikki and Spike though.
How old is Nicky supposed to be? Because Buffy is supposed to be amazing because she has lasted so long, but Nicky looks older than Buffy.
Why has Nikki bought her son along, apart from the obvious angst implications later? Seems kind of an odd thing to do, especially if you’re out fighting a vamp that already killed one Slayer. Childcare must have been a bitch in 1977 if she had to drag her son on the hunt. Surely her Watcher could’ve babysat?
“By the way, love the coat” Well, we’d guessed that, by the way you’ve worn it since, Spike
I can't help thinking that an ankle length duster isn't the most practical fight wear
Was she working ‘the mission’ when she got pregnant?
Ah, always nice to see the indoctrination starting at a young age
“The Mission is what matters” I bet you that they use that statement again later on in the episode. It’s just one of those sort of phrases you know will be reused.
Yellow wellies! One of the only two reasons I want to have children, the other being those furry animal suits with ears.
Excellent spade beheading
Buffy needs to hurry up with the staking too, now would be a really inconvenient time for her to get whacked
Spike still hasn’t realised who Principal Wood is in relation to the Slayer he killed has he? They know he’s the son of a Slayer don’t they, so wouldn’t his age be an indication as to which Slayer it was?
Was that blood strictly necessary? Okay, that must have been a sharp bit of wood. You can’t draw blood just by squeezing hard.
God what a horrible top
If Wood had really cut his hand he wouldn't be able to casually put it in his pocket like that
“Any apocalypse I avert without dying...” But it isn’t averted yet Buffy. Unless it happened when we weren’t watching!
And that’s not creepy at all Robin, telling a potential love interest that she reminds you of her mother. If she reminds you of your mother you shouldn’t be standing that close to her.
I love Giles’ righteous indignation over the state of the library. And he’s right about the books by the way. How funny is it to see Giles bitching about the new Library? I’d love to have actually seen his face when he saw it. I have to agree that although computers are good, and extremely useful, nothing quite compares to sitting with a good book
Or use it to close the door
Can we get back to more important matters. There are no books in the library?
Giles’ ability to switch topics at random is wonderfully reminiscent of Bitca when she’s in full flow.
“Did you bring back any potentials?” - No potentials, but a very nice sheepskin jacket.
Or gesture like that. Do these people have any idea how much palm wounds hurt? I had a cut about half an inch long in my palm and I couldn't move my last two fingers for days
Poor Robin, you can understand his confusion. Robin should learn to watch the previouslies.
I wish I had a cellar like that, they’ve got enough room to store their junk and keep a grown man chained to the wall. All I’ve got is a space under the stairs, and with all my junk there’s no room for anything (anyone) else...
Spike really doesn’t need anything else in his head. He wants to put a chewed piece of liquorice in Spike’s head? Well it’s certainly innovative.
Poor Spike, between Giles and Willow this can't be very reassuring
Giles beat me to the brain joke. That was remarkably controlled of Giles, considering the insults he could have made.
At least let him lay down first
Eww, it had to go in through his eye? Nice purloined 'Stargate' effect though. I had a distinct ' Star Trek: Wrath of Khan' moment with that silvery moving rock thingy. Yuck - I always hated that scene the first time round, so seeing something go in through the eye was even worse.
Ah, Geek!Spike. And h is poetry is still dire. I think that’s a different wig they’re using for this flashback to William. It’s still pretty atrocious - as is the poetry he’s reciting.
You’re just encouraging him. Why not try and persuade him to take up another hobby?
Gah, more Oedipus malarky. There is some seriously creepy maternal attachment going on here. Mother is doing her best to palm him off though
That wig is not a good wig.
I don’t think that William has to worry about looking after his mother for that much longer.
Coughing up blood is not alright
Could a consumptive have the breath to sing after a coughing attack?
It's "rising" not "shining"
Parents have a lot to answer for.
Found it
Well that kind of serves everyone right for standing around gawping.
Ooh, quality menacing glare from Principal Wood
The ‘I am calm’ comment from Spike would have been a lot more convincing without the freak-out that occurred just before.
“I clocked the niblet pretty fierce.” That was more than a little bit British.
What is that thing on Anya’s head? Was there cattle around that she had to get rid of?
“Spike’s got a get out of jail free card” - Also known as ‘fantastic in bed’.
This should have been shown before last week’s Angel, shouldn’t it? Is 'Buffy' two weeks ahead of 'Angel' in the States then?
Daffodils and viscera, lovely combination. The new room fragrance from Glade plug-ins.
I miss the chemistry between Spike and Dru - it’s so gloriously twisted.
Dru doesn’t look impressed by the idea of a mother in law tagging along. Parents always ruin these kind of trips
For once, Dru is the sane one.
"Little bit." There's a boy who was taught never to lie to his mother. I love how the mother manages to get the new evil vampire to feel sheepish.
Okay, this is just *wrong*
Willow wisely electing not to explain the LA situation to Buffy. I wouldn’t fancy explaining it to Buffy either. Can you imagine telling Buffy that the other vamp with a soul she’s slept with has gone psycho again? It wouldn’t be pretty.
Don’t kid yourself Giles, it’s not so much as the watcher/slayer dynamic as the Giles and Buffy one.
Buffy didn’t tell Giles about the little fact PW mother was a Slayer? Isn’t that a rather important bit of information?
Giles made the connection pretty quickly though, I’m impressed. I can't believe Giles didn't realise who Robin was before now. You'd have thought the Council would be keeping track of a slayer's child
Unwitting instrument of evil. Okay, that's less helpful to Spike than I meant it to be
Buffy never sees anything coming, she doesn't look and she's done alright so far
Don't lecture Giles about "the greater good"
Spike is at Robin’s house to watch over him? Buffy fell for that? She’s really off her game.
Yes Buffy, but the picture you’re looking at is a framed one of yourself.
Telephone men generally need inspirational speeches. Poor, poor confused repair man. That poor telephone man! He had no previous exposure to the speeches, he had no defense mechanism! No fast-forward either, he actually had to sit through all of it
“It takes more than rousing speeches...” Especially if the speeches in question are Buffy’s.
Making hard decisions and being a bitch to everyone you meet aren't quite the same thing
Spike should be backing slowly out of the room now.
Spike’s a dead man, if you think logically about it.
“Not much for self-reflection.” Well, it might be difficult. Vamp’s don’t appear in mirrors. Oh - it wasn’t that type of reflection he meant was it? There goes my cheesy joke.
Careen, that’s a good verb.
Spike was never oblivious to the misery he caused other people, it's just that when he was evil he enjoyed it
Ooh, the bondage equipment's coming out. And we all laughed at Andrew when he said there was chemistry there
“Killed a lot of people’s mothers” Spike really isn’t helping himself here. Spike, sometimes honesty is not the best policy, and now is probably one of those times.
Downloading songs off the internet is risky, you can end up with some really strange versions. Wood is lucky that he didn’t end up with a thrash metal version. That music could drive me to kill even without the trigger
If they’d used that song as the ‘Rocky’ theme tune it would have been a much better film.
She’s right, being cruel is quite liberating.
Parasites don’t slither away, do they? Surely sticking around is what a parasite does?
Poor Spike, your family can be your harshest critics. "Witless prattle" is good
Those poor books! Get him off them!
Another whole year with Dawn will change a person's perspective.
Buffy would let Dawn die now to save the world, despite sacrificing herself before, but she refuses to consider restraining the quite possibly still psycho, still triggerable Vampire? That’s insane logic there.
Why put the nice clean shirt back on now? It's going get all dusty and sweaty
That coat's never going to fit Wood
That is not something anyone ever needs to hear from their mother. Gagh, really scary Oedipus stuff now.
You still are a vampire, Spike
The fight between Spike and Principal Wood is very well done, and choreographed - it really does fit in with the idea of a ‘dance’ that Spike seems to view his fights as.
I did wonder why Spike appeared to deliberately trigger himself though. Any ideas?
“You cured me” - A brutal fight: Quicker and cheaper than therapy.
He realised his mother loved him and now everything's okay? I'm speechless, I honestly am. How cheap was that?
Good grief, a soul doesn’t stop you from doing bad things. Every murderer has a soul.
Buffy Summers, Brain of Sunnydale, "You're stalling me."
I have a very weird image of SMG as a cigar smoking Nazi now.
“ The mission is what matters” Didn’t I say they’d reuse it? The idea of duty of the Slayer over whatever other personal responsibilities they have.
“I think you taught me all I need to know” - Did he teach you cook lasagna? Everyone needs to know how to cook lasagna.
She closed the door on Giles. She won’t listen to anyone now. That’s not going to turn out well.

Dirty Girls

For a brief, shining moment, I wondered if that was going to be Lindsey
A priest in a pickup? A southern priest in a pickup? Something isn’t right here... Warning. Priests are never usually good in this type of programme.
How many southern-belle slayers do the PTB need? Surely they should spread them around geographically?
Everyone should be in bed at this time of night, it's a ridiculous time to be out
Caleb, hmm, suspicious name.
Excuse me! Where did he get 'whore' from? Well he’s direct, you’ve got to give him that
‘I’m not’, says Shannon, ‘I’m just a little grubby.’
You see, evil priest. This is why I have issues with religion.
She’s probably not going to remember that message, with the searing pain and all.
Willow, she’s just been thrown out of car at high speed, it’s unlikely that she’ll be OK.
This looks too good for Xander for it to be real, it must be a dream sequence.
Oh yeah, the pillow fight and the lesbian sex confirms it, dream sequence. Xander is always refreshingly straight forward in his fantasies: Slayers, lesbians and general worshipping of Xander.
Would those girls still have underwear on in a real dream sequence?
Poor Xander, even in his frustrated dreams he still scares himself
Xander coming back to Earth with a bump. That’s a tough way to be woken out of any kind of dream.
Can you just watch surgery in Sunnydale? Like a spectator sport?
I know Faith, I’ve been saying the same for ages.
They really thought that the ultimate evil was going to be kept at bay by the California Penal Service?
The girl’s the vampire, right?
I like the "I'm more reformed than you are..."
We believe you Buffy, thousands wouldn’t.
Faith mildly freaked about being the good slayer, "If I'm the good one, what the hell are all the rest like?"
You can understand Faith’s confusion, the roles have changed a bit.
Ooh, someone's got a complex
Some table lamps can be quite interesting if you’re into that sort of thing. I've had some very exciting table lamps in my time...
No same house, different furniture. Its only a different house if it’s, you know, not the same house.
Dawn is wearing a netball skirt.
Ooh, Dawn has an evil squint at Faith there.
You can tell Faith's reformed. The old Faith would have made a "squeezing you in" joke
It looks more like Ribena to me.
It's the Last Supper, you'll get what you're given
“Drink this wine in remembrance of me... it is a merlot”
“I was looking for the lord in the wrong places” Have you tried behind the sofa? Or down the back of the fridge? That’s where missing things always end up.
No Buffy, you are the only one who thinks you’re God. Even Spike has moved on.
SMG is so much more convincing as a bad guy than Charisma Carpenter is
He must have racked up no end of Air Miles
For a moment there I was thinking ‘I missed Ray Charles?’
“Woman’s first sin” my arse. I think that you had better put another link to 'Billy' in, I don’t need to say all this again.
"A large evil Mexican serape." Next appearing as the villain in 'X-Men 3'
I love Andrew’s montage, and the bit with the Vulcans is just fantastic. Vulcans... Oh I love Andrew
I hope Andrew is collecting all of these for a special DVD.
How does Amanda know about this?
He looks a lot better actually
It doesn’t look like it means a lot.
You don't have time for your job, of course you're fired
How is she going to afford to get them ready without a salary?
And Robin displays a refreshingly un-American view of the morality of war.
Good to see the writers are keeping up the smoking/dark side theme. Have we seen Faith smoke before? I know it goes with the bad-girl image and all, but I can’t ever remember seeing her actually smoke.
Neagh! The sight of a half-naked Spike wrapped in pale blue sheets just scared the crap out of me
Why don’t they let all the girls sleep in the cellar and then Spike could have one of the smaller rooms upstairs.
Lovely little scene between Spike and Faith. Spike and Faith could have some fun together, they’ve got a great rapport.
Ah, it’s always appropriate to have a dig at Mariah Carey.
You can tell Faith secretly liked ‘Glitter’
Buffy declines to tell them that she's been fired again
If I had been Buffy I would have been very tempted to hide under the bed when Dawn asked for me, if only to get half an hour's peace
Why do they need a photo of that? It looks fairly permanent
What does he have of hers? An understanding of her atavistic impulse to walk straight into a trap in an attempt to be a hero?
Who translates these speeches for the Chinese potential? Perhaps she remains in blissful ignorance
I looked and checked, Caleb doesn't have 'Love' and 'Hate' tattooed on his knuckles, or even 'Luv' and 'Hat'
Yes Giles, but you could have some very important stapling to do. Surely Buffy would know if Caleb had her stapler. Or is it just me that has such a strong link her to stationary supplies? I pity the fool that tries to take my stapler...
But Buffy and Faith didn’t know they were Potentials until they became Actuals did they?
“The cavalry is a frightened guy with a rock.”
But Matthew Broderick didn’t... Oh, ok.
I adore Andrew's Godzilla pain. So, so familiar
Yes it's scary going into the evil lair, but it's better than waiting for the Big Bad to come into your house
Oh God, now Xander's at it... Xander beats Buffy at the motivational speeches without even trying.
That's usually the signal
Actually Buffy, that's a cellar. A vineyard would be full of vines. Aren’t Vineyards usually outside?
Trust Spike to make a daytime TV reference.
One of the slayers, anyway.
Spike has the best 'this man's a psycho' expression
Would it be a pun too far to say that Caleb has a hell of a headbutt?
St Paul was an idiot.
1 Potential down, only 37 to go.
Buffy couldn't have just yelled "Retreat"?
Why does Molly have onions around her neck?
Xander’s eye! Oh no! Not poor Xander! Very bad edit alert! For once I’m glad I stumbled across a spoiler, or I would have no idea what just happened there
There should be a law about harming Xander, it upsets me.
Andrew’s voiceovers are much better than the priest’s.
Did anyone else notice the Buffy 6 DVD has karaoke on it?

Empty Places

Work today has reduced my mind to mush, on top of which I’ve just had several glasses of wine. This may result in even more tangents on my fringedwellings than normal.
That was a far more accurate scream from Xander this time. Oh, we didn’t see that shot of Xander last week, did we? Okay, so that's the shot they cut at five to nine last week, why show it at five past eight now (and at five past six on the Saturday repeat)? I really didn’t need to see the eye-poking scene. I’m squeamish about eyes and poking. I have issues with people putting in contact lenses in front of me. Ewwww.
Finally everyone in Sunnydale gets the idea: Get the hell out of there. It looks like the rats are leaving the sinking ship. This town largely ignores the bizarre things that happen on a regular basis, why are they leaving now?
Clem! Always guaranteed to brighten up an apocalypse.
Ut-huh. Must be bad if Clem’s off. I have a soft spot for Clem; he’s such a sweetheart. With a car I’d love to have. Although the old Beetles are much, much cooler. Just like minis. Clem has a nicer car than I do, it’s not fair! See, new Beetles, evil and the transport of demons
Buffy sounds really hoarse here.
Clem's pep talks are at least as good as Buffy's
Why is that Clem is more concerned about not demoralising the troops more than Buffy the supposed ‘General’? He really is digging the hole deeper each time he tries to recover though. Bless. Lots of Freudian slips.
Poor Clem is really putting his foot in it here.
Has Clem got different make-up this week? Is it even the same actor?
They tried leaving before, didn’t they, in a camper van? I don’t think it ended well.
What is with Buffy’s top(s) today? Isn’t it against the fashion law to wear a black bra under a white shirt? Or is there special exemption if you’re fighting the apocalypses?
* Sniff * that could be the last ever shot of Clem.
Giles as Interpol? They’ve got to have put a spell on the policeman or something. Willow and Giles don’t look that convincing. Have the Sunnydale police been on training in Smallville? Well, I suppose it’s as good as excuse for any. I can completely see ASH as one though. I suppose that would make Willow the Scully to his Mulder? Being short and redheaded. That sort of reminds me, 'Spooks' starts again soon. Coolness.
Willow can do the Jedi Mind Trick? I always wanted to be able to do that, "The homework does not matter..." She’s doing the Jedi mind trick. And just how many of us picked up on that I wonder? I swear I had it written on my note-pad before I looked at what anyone had already written.
Giles is looking yummy in that polo neck.
Never trust a man in a polo neck.
I like Giles' Police-impersonating trenchcoat
I take it the fugitive in question is Faith?
Pain meds are horrible on stomachs
Card games are out if he's got no depth perception.
You bitch Buffy, one game of cards wouldn’t hurt.
I think he should go with the parrot
Oh Xander. Dear, dear Xander. Oh dear, those jokes aren’t funny Xander, not now.
Okay, I’m sobbing already.
How misty-eyed did I get with whole Xander & Willow scene? The way they were trying to joke and then Willow was losing the battle not to cry and Xander was trying to console her and the handholding and the best friendliness of it all... Waaah. Definite lump in throat time.
Andrew is missing an umlaut on that u. (Sorry, couldn’t find a u with an umlaut, ironically enough)
I like Anya's helpful prompt cards
Well done Andrew, correct your mistakes.
Is it wrong that I still find Andrew’s whiteboard/flipcharts amusing?
In which case I suggest that they bring a mallet
Anya’s speech is about as helpful as one of Buffy’s, but I like the illustrations in the background.
Wow, Anya's wearing some spectacularly high heels. How can she stand up? Anya’s is looking rather 50’sish (as the decade, rather than the age) in that outfit. I quite like it though
Yes Amanda, but you have Connect Four on the shelf behind you so all is not lost.
Anya wins on the motivational speeches.
Far TMI there from Anya. And the slightly nauseated looks from the potentials as they move from the bed are snicker inducing.
Andrew, how did this show ever cope without you? It's the little grin as he underlines 'break up sex' on the board
Surely a bag of crisps is worth a lot more than soap and fags?
Yes Faith, but you tried to kill him afterwards.
The idea of covert religiosity freaks me out.
Why search the California records? That's obviously not where he's from
Because he rendered a slayer useless with one punch?
Faith is looking quite pretty there. And being diplomatic to the obviously in-denial Buffy. She’s grown up a lot from the rebel slayer we remember. (I have no idea what I just wrote that about!)
The punishment for talking out of turn, being forced to return to Anya's seminar
There’s something odd about wandering around a school when there’s no pupils there, it’s a very eerie feeling. I love schools when they’re empty like that.
Buffy cuts and runs to her happy safe place ON THE HELLMOUTH
They use that picture of the three of them a lot in the show. Is it the official ‘younger and happier photo, i.e. pre death or turn to the dark side or maiming?
Where did she expect Caleb to end up?
‘Little Lady’ Euugh. Words cannot express how much Caleb annoys me.
Will someone please castrate Caleb? Slowly? In public?
Ooh, solid empty threat from Buffy there
She’s going to be a messy, squishy part of all this if she doesn’t do something soon.
Don’t just dangle. Kick him with your high heels! Knee him in the balls Buffy! Or get thrown through a window, that’ll work too...
Ah, one of the perils of communal living is the food thief. Andrew is fixated on the food issue isn’t he? Mind you, house battles frequently start over such things. Or over whose supposed to do the dishes...
If Giles said ‘Shut up and pay attention’ in that tone of voice to me, I would probably do as he said. Mind you, I probably would be paying far too much attention to him anyway.
That's some high resolution photograph they've got there
He only picked Amanda because he can’t remember any of the others’ names.
Spike dying would have been a fairly real ramification
You’ve got to admire Andrew’s persistence.
Giles tea still has the bag in it
It might not be a bad idea not to talk about "Them" when they're all still in the room
The Bronze is still open? Bronze It’s the Bronze! Nice to see some Sunnydale institutions are still going strong. And according to my sources, the band playing on stage is actually Nerf Herder.
I’m not sure making Faith social secretary was such a good idea.
‘Living on a wing and prayer’ is a rather appropriate lyric for the entire situation I feel.
I'm so jealous! I've hit my head lots of times and I've never seen cartoon birdies. I've never even seen animated stars
Cheap disinfectant is probably the reason, but all hospitals smell disgusting.
It’s funny how The First seems to have the same throat infection as Buffy.
It’s a good plan, but it depends on the girls actually listening to Buffy. Buffy led them into an evil lair, Faith took them to a club. I’m thinking their allegiance may have changed.
Oh bless, Amanda’s drunk.
Yeah, like Faith was drinking 7-Up when she was seventeen
Oh this is just not the time. Was waiting for the Policemen to make an appearance after the mention of the ‘wanted fugitive’
The slayers in training are finally working as a team. Oh yes, and this is the message we want to be sending to young people
If Buffy was ready to risk their lives in the vinyard... thank you, Faith.
Oh, very grown up Buffy. Oooh, Little Miss Judgemental can't take any criticism because she's perfect and wonderful
Andrew is looking very comfortable with his arms around Spike there.
I love the Spike and Andrew bonding over snack food.
Spike has taken time to research the method of making the Onion Flowers? The mind boggles.
Not a lot of suspension on that bike is there?
Extreme walking is not as dangerous as extreme barbeque - you try barbequing on an Aberystwyth beach in high winds!
Willow and Anya, arguably the two most important people in Xander’s life have brought him home, and are looking very protective of him
I'm not entirely sure Xander needs two people to walk him through the door
If they really wanted to welcome him home they should’ve been naked and pillow-fighting.
"Going back in," because that worked so well for you last time. I hope this plan has foot notes
It’s a four letter abbreviation actually.
I like the idea of introducing yourself as the bad cop.
Andrew should just shut up, quickly.
Really odd mix of menace and compassion from Spike there. Andrew trying to be intimidating and failing miserably.
That Priest looks amazingly tall next to Spike. Mind you, James Masters is rather short.
To access the secret passage you have to squeeze Mary’s breast?
What does the inscription say? Get out of the way!
Shouldn’t Xander at least get to sit out these speeches.
Hallelujah. I spent most of this scene cheering as everyone stood up to Little Miss Sanctimonious. She’s been woe is me for so long, I think she’s forgotten what the others have suffered too. And the way they all backed each other up, shows how much she’s alienated the rest of the group. So consider the scene to be punctuated with lots of comments like ‘about time’ and ‘You tell her!’
They’re just not willing to follow her blindly anymore are they? And she can’t tolerate the thought of having to follow anyone else.
That Don Quixote reference is going to lose people, and that’s twice this week that I’ve written that. Windmills? Did Giles just say windmills? I have rewound that four times and he still seems to say windmills. Am I missing something? I got the Don Quixote reference! I felt all educated and proud of myself for that.
Go on everyone, keep kicking her whilst she’s down.
Democracies do win battles, generally because they’re forced to be very careful about which ones they fight.
Anya’s put her finger right on it there.
When Xander is against you Buffy, it’s time to give in.
The Chinese potential seems to be getting this just fine, even without helpful drawings.
However she's quite happy to lead them into disaster personally
“You can’t stay here” We need your bed...
Technically its Buffy’s house, so shouldn’t everyone else get out?
Kind of a ‘Passing of the torch’ scene. I did feel slightly sorry for Buffy. Not much though, after all the snotty ‘I know best’ comments she’s made towards everyone else (Giles, Faith, Willow etc...)
So where's Buffy going exactly? 'Away' isn't much of a direction
How ill was SMG this week? She sounded like Dolph Lundgren

Touched

Why do they insist on showing that shot of Xander’s eye being gouged out? Uch.
"Power to the people” And Freedom for Tooting! I've just dated myself there, haven't I?
What's with the pointless fidgety camera work? I think we've all figured out that the house is unsteady and fragmented, we don't need the nausea inducing visual metaphor
Well that’s what happens when you get rid of your only short meglomaniac.
Faith's very laid back up to a point. At least she lets them air some ideas and talk. Unlike someone *cough*Buffy*cough*.
That was a dramatically well timed power cut. I bet Buffy cut the lights just to be petty.
With all the people moving out of Sunnydale, it should make it easier to house the SITs.
It took the power station shutting down to make that family leave?
Buffy would have a fight on her hands if she tried to evict me from my house like that. My front door is a lot stronger, anyway.
Buff’s all 'woe is me' again. So bored of it. And she kicked one of the few remaining residents out of his own place. Naughty girl.
Awww, look. Xander still has both his eyes in the credits.
Which episode is that snouty-thing after Xander in the credits from? I don’t remember it. Was it the thing that tried to eat Willow when she wasn't there?
Spike is on the verge of killing Andrew, and I don’t blame him in the slightest. Spike’s only pissed because he’s losing. "Boxes. More boxes. Even more boxes. And that's when I killed him your honour." Never play I-spy when there's nothing to spy
The worst thing that can happen to Buffy? Probably to wake up and realise that the sun doesn’t revolve around her.
Xander’s recycling part of his Pirate costume there. Very dashing.
Xander’s really trying with the pirate thing. Bless.
Last humans in Sunnydale. Bet there are lots of demons and stuff to keep them company though.
Caleb didn’t like you much either, Xander.
I would say that Caleb was worse then the vampires, Buffy actually managed to kill one of them
She was thinking more about torturing it for information
Willow's backing up Faith there, which is nice.
Faith may be telling them what she wants them to do, but at least she's explaining the reasoning behind the decision.
Ah, that awkward staff to management transition
Aren’t the Bringers blind? How can they dig and use tools efficiently?
Letting the blind guys free with a blow torch is a recipe for disaster
Caleb v. v. annoying. The First (AKA Buffy2 ) v. v, annoying too. That sounded like Bridget Jones there, huh. Anyone know the Aber link to Bridget Jones Diary?
Surely Kennedy isn’t dumb enough to... no, she’s just bait.
Action Giles. Mmmm. Who would have thought that Giles would choose the cowboy way
Oooh Casual!Giles.
If they're mute, then how do the bringers communicate? Sign language clearly isn't an option
Since when has Dawn been Research Girl? How could Dawn read Ancient Turkish? I’m pretty sure that there isn’t an English-Ancient Turkish translator on the internet. I know she’s got a lot of free time, I imagine learning Turkish takes a while. I do love her moment of rage when she finds out that someone has already translated it for her.
He’s taking the snacks with him to the toilet?
“Thank God I don’t breathe” This is Spike’s punishment for past sins.
"And..." threw the snotty little bitch out of the house
That’s just Willow’s polite way of saying that Buffy stomped off in a huff.
That sounded ad-libbed to me
Spike’s surprisingly self-righteous for someone who spent the last century and a half delighting in causing evil and chaos.
Giles is being particularly useless this episode. In fact, he’s been fairly inconsequential all season.
They've saved hers a time or two, so I'd guess they're even on that score
I find it slightly disturbing that Spike can seemingly track Buffy by following her scent. Must be a bloody strong perfume she’s wearing. The mind boggles.
I could’ve sworn Willow started that spell with the words ‘Cornish pasty’.
Andrew speaking for the bringer is rather cool.
“We also run errands and undertake light housework, no heavy lifting.”
That Bringer may have had a lot more information to give them.
In Sunnydale? There are bound to be a hundred underground places like that!
Now's definitely time for a Locket, or Andrew might appreciate the Halls Menthol man
How can Spike enter that house? What would happen if the owner returned to collect something? Surely Buffy's living there now? Or doesn't squatting invoke the invite-needing spell?
New scene Buffy was right? Did I miss something? I thought that Buffy was right about Caleb and the vinyard, but I don't think that they should go in like a pack of morons and get their arses kicked again
Poor Buffy, she's had her feelings trampled on, well welcome to the world. You have a duty with or without their support
That’s it Faith. The key to leadership is being precise.
“Faith. You’re doing just fine.” It was such a sweet moment. Giles knows just what to say to reassure her and she appreciates it too.
The Mayor. Still with the platitudes I see.
Oh, I’ve missed the Mayor.
That figures, Meg was an uptight bitch. Jo was my hero. Jo was one of my favourites. Although, actually, I quite liked Amy on occasion, although she could be rather spoilt. But she ended up with Laurie, so that was a major plus point.
The Mayor/First is playing on her old insecurities.
I think Buffy's dangerous. To the First
Maybe she doesn’t want the potentials back.
‘Unkempt’ what kind of a word is that for Spike to use?
Why did Buffy never have this much worry about putting the Scooby Gang in danger?
Save me from Buffy’s introspection.
Buffy and Spike are going to end up having sex soon, aren’t they?
I'm not entirely sure "unattainable" is the word. She seemed pretty damn attainable to me
Pity ditty. Love it.
“You’re insufferable” She really is.
Poor Spike's got a rant in here somewhere, if he can just manage to get it out... I could have phrased that better couldn't I?
I’m going to refrain from making a crude comment about where the blood was rushing. Spike’s blood shouldn’t rush anywhere!
Spike seemed fairly certain about the onion thing too.
"How you try..." How you so rarely succeed
He sees all that? Where is Spike looking exactly?
Oh God, she’s going to ask him to stay with her isn’t she?
That was an unexpected Python reference from Spike. "No! Not the comfy chair!"
Oh Spike was so hinting at sharing the bed anyway.
Ugh, “Will you just hold me?”, how vomit-inducing.
He’s right; Faith is looking a little spooked. Not surprising I suppose, I’d be a bit spooked too f I’d just seen my evil former-father-figure.
“The first what” says Robin.
Robin has a brief return to the classroom there as he patches up Faith’s poor cultural knowledge.
She was a completely different actress!
I do believe that they are going to have Potential End Of The World Sex (abbreviated after to PEOTWS), as first demonstrated by Cordelia and Connor. To be honest I am amazed Faith lasted this long. She was in prison a while.
There’s a lot of sex in this episode, and Faith is going to have to tie her hair back before it annoys them
That’s really not a flattering angle there for Alyson Hannigan. The way they’ve shot it, she almost looks double chinned, which she most definitely is not!
I do believe Kennedy & Willow are also about to have PEOTWS. Given the big deal WB made about Willow and Tara’s first kiss, I’m surprised they’re showing this.
I’d still be having nightmares about the Warren thing to be honest.
Do they only have one spoon in the whole house?
I think I know where this scene is heading - PEOTWS for Xander and Anya as well.
Xander, Anya, and the icecream, was the most romantic moment in this whole sequence.
Anya had better be careful or that patch is going to come off.
Buffy and Spike are cuddling, Faith and Robin are having athletic sex, the lesbians are at it and even Anya and Xander have one last fling, and still Giles doesn’t get to have sex with anybody. The poor man deserves some PEOTWS too. I’m sure I wouldn’t mind volunteering. I too am more than happy to volunteer my services to even out the score on Giles' behalf
Caleb and the First discuss the fact that they just aren't getting any
Buffy must have cramp in that arm by now.
They showed that stupid ad for that facial wash with the ‘little scrubbers’. It always makes me giggle.
Buffy will see them a mile off.
Robin is only useful in bed, it seems.
Okay, so they just separated the original Scoobies from all the others? I smell a plot.
Not something of yours, You.
The fight coordinator has been watching ' The Matrix, I think. It’s about time that Buffy kicked ass though. Ha! Everybody loves 'The Matrix'. Buffy remembers that there is no spoon. It's certainly been a long time coming, but when did Buffy suddenly get good? She had a great personal revelation and it doubled her fighting skills?
Be careful of the wine! I hate to bang on about this, but if Buffy had a flamethrower she could have killed Caleb after he soaked himself in wine. Or anytime she wanted, really.
Great planning, a pitched battle in a small, confined dark place. Not one of the greatest military decisions ever made.
Spring-loaded trapdoor. Handy.
Ooh, shiny. Am I supposed to know what that is? Because it looks like a glass harpoon.
Damn, that means Buffy was right.
Caleb did a 'Die Hard'. Gagh! Bomb! That’s a mean way to end an episode!

End Of Days

This is the 2nd to last ever episode of Buffy. I’m going into denial.
Really wish they’d stop showing the eye gouging though.
This is the penultimate episode, why are they bothering? If people haven’t started to watch yet, why would they do so now?
Big bomb, make big boom.
The Axe in the Stone, making Buffy the once and future avatar. ‘Sword in the Stone’? Oh please. If Buffy’s Arthur, I assume that would make Giles Merlin, and therefore Willow would either be the Lady of the Lake or Morgan Le Fey? Hmm.
"Can you prise..." Yep, looks like it
I think that Caleb may well be regretting that ‘girly-girl’ now Buffy has perfected her King Arthur impression.
I like Caleb's surprisingly restrained "Darn."
It's big and pointy, what more does she need to know?
That desperate attempt is never going to work Caleb.
If I had discovered that on an archaeological dig, I would have been very disappointed.
‘Faith go boom’ An accurate and succinct summary from the First. It’s not so much Faith go boom. Bomb go boom, Faith go splat.
However that desperate attempt went pretty well
They’re playing on what they see as Buffy’s weakness - her friends, aren’t they?
So, all the Potentials seem to be slightly worse for wear, but no-one’s dead.
What idiot potential went to the battle in a calf-length skirt?
It must be an older Slayer/potential-type thing. Bossiness comes with the package.
Run little SITs, run!
Nice to see the potentials working as a team, defending the unconscious Faith.
Chinese Potential is quite quick on the uptake now.
Uh-oh, it’s the freaky Master-type Vamps again.
“We can take one of these things” - With absolutely no weapons whatsoever?
They could take one Bringer, but two?
It’s 8.04pm! That is a ridiculously early ad-break.
Giles has his priorities right it seems, going straight for the Jaffa Cakes. I had a moment of kinship with Giles over the Jaffa Cakes. Giles shows Jaffa Cakes the respect they deserve. I adored the delighted sound of Giles voice when he saw them, and the lunge for the packet cracked me up. The man obviously has good taste. I could just eat one now, actually. I still can't see Jaffa cakes without thinking of Tobin's pack of Teal'c themed Jaffa Cakes
Andrew’s raison de etre - to provide and provision the Scoobies. It’s quite sweet actually.
It’s behind you!
There was never just going to be one Uber-Vamp was there
Buffy proves to the SIT girls that you have to make an entrance to have an effect.
Excellent. Make way for the professional.
It’s a double -ended weapon? I’m surprised no one’s thought of that before.
What is Willow supposed to do to the heavily bleeding girl anyway?
Well, the axe is shiny if nothing else.
They’re gonna need a bigger first aid kit.
Actually it did happen to her. That was part of the reason they threw her out in the first place
‘Are you back?’ She never went away.
That’s not a scythe, it’s an axe with a pointy end.
“Scythe matters” Oh bless them, they had to make that pun! It’s as good as “mythtaken” in season four. They haven't had a joke that good since the vampire bat. I laughed so much at that joke. The gleeful twinkle in Willow’s eye, Giles looking exasperatedly amused and Buffy trying hard not to snigger out loud, it felt like the old dynamic for a moment. Plus I’m a sucker for a bad pun.
Giles doesn’t look the least concerned by the fact that size matters.
There’s the axe, and the stake. What’s the third way to kill something with it?
True, it’s usually the villains that spill the beans to anyone that will listen to them.
Name? Like Arthur’s sword Excalibur? His shield, Pridwen? And his spear, the gloriously inappropriately named Ron?
Somehow I doubt the mystical scythe has a Visa card
Giles is still excited by the thought of researching a new weapon. Bless.
This scene has a first season feel to it. That’s good.
The wooden spoon splint is a nice touch
I think that Andrew and Anya are getting a little depressed there and feeling their mortality.
I think Anya's finding take-charge!Andrew kinda sexy
God love Andrew and bless his little cotton socks too
Xander is being put out to pasture like a cow. Are there hats involved?
It's when a horse is retired and doesn't need to be kept in a stable and fed all the time anymore
I really want to see one of those fighting cows that Xander is talking about.
"At the end." When we win and then party
I was just about to point out it was Willow that brought back Buffy from the dead, when I realised that Xander has too - way back in ' Prophecy Girl'. Willow was just the most recent.
Evil monks? Been there, done that.
Monks don't have to be Christian
That’s a very quick internet connection Willow has.
Ah, The research twins (Willow and Giles) are in full flow again, bouncing ideas off each other. I’ve missed that kind of interaction between the main cast members.
When Giles looses faith in the books it’s all over.
Have they checked to see if it's written on the handle? Or if there's a little sticker reading 'Property Of...'. The manufacturer’s name is usually printed somewhere.
M? It means they thought about it, ("Mmm"), and then still didn't have a clue ("?")
The explanatory finger pointing is back!
Giles working through a little Ivanhoe moment
But Tobin's right, that's quite clearly an axe
I always wondered what happened to Miss Kitty Fantastico.
OK, own up, who left the sword in the back of the car?
"No more fun and games." That's really funny
Okay we are loosing our power. Why did none of us come up with the eye joke? If Xander wanted, we’d make eye jokes. Good ones, too.
Xander and Dawn have a pretty good rapport - he really is an older brother figure to her.
Eh? What just happened? What in blazes is Xander doing driving off with Dawn? There’d better be a good explanation. Hooray for Xander! Hey, hooray for Buffy, this was her idea.
Ooh, temper temper
American Merlot should be flushed anyway. Bulgaria, that's the place for Merlot
“I am calm!” bellows Caleb.
Priests don’t get a lot of practice in seduction.
He's shagging the First, isn't that more of a self-service thing?
“I’m trying to make you a god.” Oh please. A god? With that hair?
I’m assuming that completely black eyes on Caleb are just as worrying (if not more so) than a black-eyed Willow?
Wars are also a lot about trying *not * to die.
Buffy looks unsettled by the thought of Faith and Principal Wood. Good.
Learn to share girls
"Good friends, or mortal enemies." That seems to be a theme with Buffy's lovers
There is a certain connection between the two, which just isn’t possible with anyone else, from actually being the Slayers.
Loved the reasoning behind why they’d didn’t get on with each other before Buffy: “Also, you were evil and killing People” Faith: “Also a factor”. The conversation just tickled me.
Cordelia did the whole ‘alone in a crowd thing’ far more succinctly back in series one.
“Thank god we’re hot chicks with superpowers.” At least Buffy and Faith have that much, some of us have to deal with life without the superpowers...
Holy Hand Grenade! Somehow I can see Spike watching the Pythons. So, all Willow and Giles need to do is watch Monty Python & the Holy Grail for the instructions then? That's his second Python joke in two weeks. Makes you wonder if we’ll get a reference to them next week. It'll have to be a really good one though.
I might consider ditching a bloke if I got one of those shiny axes.
Spike, you don’t have bosoms, don’t be so hard on yourself.
Shirty is a word isn’t it? Okay my computer says it isn’t. Of course "shirty" is a word, it's just a word you can say in front of your Mum
I though Xander gave her strength?
Buffy never seems to know anything.
Excuse me while I vomit.
In that case Spike needs to get out more.
The Buffy/Spike sap was rather nauseating. I just concentrated on the beautiful blue eyes full of emotion, and tried to block the “Best night of my life” drivel.
I’m not sure that there’s anything I could do and not spell. So either you've got an extremely limited repertoire or a very extensive vocabulary. Sadly, both.
“We’ll go be heroes”, was quite a good line, and appropriate for the whole gang, rather than just Spike and Buffy.
Oxygen tanks! Let's do that
“I've often thought so” Yeah, Anya, me too.
If it's the end of the world, then there's not really anywhere you can go to. Except possibly the Bahamas. That'd be nice
Anya is so strangely inspirational.
Anya has obviously been well trained in geekdom by Xander. And she’s obviously grown attached to the concept of humans, even if she did look uncomfortable when Andrew mentioned it.
Wheelchair fight? Oh you've just got to. Oh you know that we’d be playing with the wheelchairs too. Humm. While it’s nice to see uncomplicated mucking about, is there really time for that?
Those gates are a bit ominous. It's kind of neat how the ivy has managed to twine all round them, yet not grown anywhere that would stop them opening
How come they never noticed the mini-pyramid before?
Buffy's version of a stealth entry
Hello, who’s this and how come they haven’t stumbled on her in the last seven years?
She looks like an elf
The ancient woman said ‘nope’.
Not sure I’d have handed over the scythe to the random old woman like that, but then I’m not Buffy.
Pulling an axe out of a stone is one thing, but putting it in in the first place? That's impressive
“No, really?” I seem to remember that being my first reaction to Buffy’s name too.
At last, an answer to the eternal question “Who watches the watchers?” The Guardians, obviously.
Women who want to help and protect, but not actually do anything practical.
“And now there was you”? I think the Guardian has got a little confused.
I still go for the crossbow.
That Guardian was absolutely no use whatsoever
We really needed to hear that neck snap then, it just looks like she’s fainted.
She said "near", don't get cocky
Since when does Dawn have a tazer? Dawn, stunning the man currently driving the car along the road is not a very safe thing to do. Stupid girl!
Since when can she drive? How is Dawn driving the car? Xander is in the way of the pedals.
You can tell Caleb’s been recharged. Buffy’s being thrown about every which way. I’m sick of seeing Caleb beating Buffy up. Get good again!
Supporting Pillar!
Nice timing. Hooray! I had forgotten he was supposed to be here! Although he doesn’t seem to do much. Angel! Whooo. Such a cool moment when she first sees him.
Why does Buffy always greet him with ‘Angel’, instead of “Hello” or “Blimey!”
But how did he know to come? And isn’t he rather busy with Jasmine at the moment? Or are the two series running on slightly different timescales again?
Buffy and Angel can always find time to flirt mid-Armageddon.
Buffy, determined to look good in front of Angel is now kicking Caleb’s arse. Angel just watches smiling.
Two slayers, a vampire and hordes of potentials, and what is it that finally does Caleb in? Heckling. Come on, that's some quality heckling from Angel, you'd be distracted
Oh, they just wanted an excuse to use that music one more time.
Considering I haven’t been a Buffy/Angel shipper for ages (if ever, I don’t think anybody should have to put up with Buffy sometimes), the whole " Buffy N Angel 4eva" kiss had me smiling for joy. Such a wonderfully sweet moment. Of course, I doubt Spike agrees somehow.
You can tell Spike’s doing the ‘I’m such a big poof’ commentary in his head.
Oh she is going to break his heart
I’m guessing Joss Wheedon is back - that was a very good episode.
La la la. I’m not watching that trailer just in case.

Chosen

It’s weird to think that these are my last Buffy fringedwellings...well, at least until I catch up with the earlier seasons anyway. I know, I'm actually finding myself strangely reluctant to sit down and watch this, especially considering there were times last year when I would have begged for it to end. I feel all tingly with anticipation. “And now, the end is near; And so I face, the final curtain...” Ahem. Apologies for the cheesy opening. If it helps, think of Spike singing the Gary Oldman/Sid Vicious version.
Previouslies now? Are you kidding? That was an odd summing up for the season. No ‘The Gift’ type previouslies? That would have been fun.
Angel and Buffy smoochies. It’s actually rather sweet. It’s the last episode, so I can be a sap if I like.
No, please explain. I want to know what he's doing there
It’s easy to bask when you’re looking at that. Mmm, Angel!
Yeah, even Angel got that message
Gah! Not so dead. She should have hacked him into little pieces.
Caleb discovers what a bitch mascara can be.
I understand that it's irrelevant, but what is Caleb hitting Buffy with? It looks like a plastic greyhound
At least we know that Angel comes out okay. He managed to get another season
“You understand nothing!” Well, duh Caleb.
Good shot! Buffy finally gets to the heart (well, the crotch) of the matter with Caleb. Nice one Buffy!
Oh you've got to love the look to the left and the look to the right and the “Had to split.”
Angel has a dossier on what’s happened? Where can I get one? It might mean Season 7 confuses me less.
Buffy’s earrings would go surprisingly well with that.
Is this amulet something we would know about if we had seen the 'Angel' episodes in the right sequence with the 'Buffy' episodes?
“I don’t know everything” Oh Bless. Angel admits it.
See, Angel thinks it's an axe
They’ll be standing shoulder to armpit unless they put her on a box again.
He's been there since the beginning, he deserves to be there at the end
Even if The First managed to get a direct flight it would take more than a few days.
Maybe if he's there they won't lose?
I love Angel’s childish jealousy about Spike’s soul. The sulky three-year-old pout is hilarious
She's right. Angel is twelve. I think Buffy gave him to much credit with the “are you twelve?” line.
Captain Peroxide! This episode has got all the jokes that they’ve been missing out on during the season.
They finally managed to get that 'Dawson’s Creek' dig in!
I love Angel's moment of "Boyfriend!" triumph
Why couldn’t we have had this humour all the time this season, and not just the last episode? I’ve missed it.
She sees thin grandchildren?
I like the cookie dough analogy, particularly the mixture of confusion and lust it creates in Angel.
Angel got distracted at the "warm, delicious" part and his brain is having trouble catching up. Despite the analogy, I get where Buffy is coming from. I’m going to use that excuse for being single now, but I might not mention the cookies. I can’t believe the rest of you lot have resisted the ‘half-baked’ jokes about the cookie dough analogy. As a lover of incredibly bad puns and word play, I just had to mention it.
“If I want someone to eat...” Glad that she stopped right there, realising exactly where it was heading.
Angel’s sinking back into the shadows, lake he did way back in ‘Welcome to the Hellmouth’ was a nice touch. Symmetry and all that.
“There’s a party in my eye socket”. Eww. Eww. A world of ewws.
“Sometimes I shouldn’t say words.” Oh we’ve all been there.
“Tall, dark and forehead.” Snigger.
Actually they... thank you Spike. I would have used tongues. Not that that is a surprise to anyone at all.
Spike’s not at all bitter about the return of Angel is he?
Oh! The picture! I have no words to describe how funny that is
Look at the expression on Buffy’s face when she says “There could be oil of some kind involved.”, it’s like Diminuendo contemplating naked Clark.
It’s really hard to concentrate with that picture of Angel in the background.
You'll notice they didn't say champion what. It could be champion teapot maker for all we know
“You’ve got Angel-breath”. And the other squabbling three year old starts his tantrum.
Spike and Buffy. That will be one thing I won't be sorry about never having to see again
There's an arm/army pun in there somewhere
Don’t diss taunting Buffy, It’s a very effective weapon.
If Spike is dead, then could the First be Spike? I know it isn't, but would it be possible?
For the final time, Buffy isn’t the only Slayer!
“I’m drowning in footwear” - That’s nearly as good as “Don’t warn the tadpoles”
Buffy is only confident of victory now? No wonder her inspirational speeches are crap.
I think it would suit you if it were a darker colour.
Giles has a hoody!
“I think it’s bloody brilliant”. Giles was smiling. *Sigh*
Slightly too much information there from Willow. Okay, neither Tara or Kennedy had a pierced tongue so how would Willow know? That’s because Sky cut the scene apparently. There was pierced tongue and bellybuttons involved, or so I’ve heard.
Giles still reassuring Willow. It’s so sweet.
I love that aside from Giles
This speech isn’t starting out any better than her last one either. Last of the motivational speeches from Buffy. Actually, it not too bad, as her speeches go. Weird hair and top though.
Principal Wood beat me to the punch line. Foiled again.
Does Wood think that the fishtank is going to help keep the vampires back? Maybe they could put Evil Daniel in it. He'd finish off a vampire of two
This whole conversation about sex and relationships is gloriously twisted. Faith and Wood have great chemistry. Wood is really riling Faith here, it’s fantastic. It’s the thumbs up which makes that “enthused” so special.
Is Kennedy wearing braces in bed?
“Sweet girl, not that bright.” That’s Buffy’s epitaph, right there. And that’s her best friend talking.
And just when you were least expecting it, Andrew as Little Red Riding Hood and Giles reduced to playing Dungeons and Dragons. Thank you Joss! I would just like to say Joss Weedon is God. Hee. And for a moment, I did think they were actually strategising. Thank you Joss.
I love Giles’ misplaced faith in the ‘bag of illusions’. “Silly, Silly, British man”. I actually quite liked that as an insult. Now I just have to try and work it into a conversation.
"A wounded dwarf with the mystical strength of a doily." Welcome to my world Giles
I could sleep on a night like this, or a day like that. I nearly fell asleep on my keyboard at work today
Either there is no breeze in Sunnydale or those bits of paper are stuck to the ground.
It would be a really inconvenient moment to need a pee
I think calling those guys "civilians" is a bit insulting
I’m assuming Xander’s with Dawn for his protection rather than hers.
Andrew’s little Oscar speech is great. Only Andrew could have prepared a death acceptance speech. “There’s some people I’d like to thank, both Good and Evil” Such a good start to the little speech. I think Andrew’s rather endearing sometimes. I can’t believe I just said that, either.
‘Are you wearing clean underwear?’ doesn’t sound anything like Goodbye.
Dawn obviously has the Summers Look of Determination down pat. It's unnerving in a way.
I wonder if there's a patch to stop buying books? "I can stop anytime I want, really." But who would want to stop buying books?
Ooh, a ‘core four’ shot, and a reference to one of my favourite ever Giles lines “The earth is doomed.” Aw, this is making me all nostalgic. I am not going to get misty over Buffy! Looking on the bright side, even if it does all go to hell, at least Giles will be proved right. It's dirt in my eye, making it water. I’m not sniffling at the sheer fantastic-ness of this little scene with the four going right back to the first episode, and the Gilesiness of his comments, honest. Waaaaaaah.
I don’t want to think about all the gross diseases you can get by doing that.
Welcome to Isengard. Buffy: When Orcs Attack.
“I’m not worried” Buffy sounds none too convincing there.
How much would they give for a really big petrol bomb right about now
Not wishing to criticise her strategy, wouldn’t it have made sense not to stand on the edge of the ledge, in full view of the hordes of orcs down there?
Now Buffy, that was a speech. I love the idea of all the potential Slayers out there being able to access their strength, although I wouldn’t want to be the pitcher throwing to the baseball girl when she whacks it. This might seem really cool and empowering, but those kids with the massive powers are going to be a bitch to handle in school. Not to mention all the super-powered toddlers kicking their cribs to pieces
Note the one, single, slightly chubby Slayer, just to even out the demographic
Hang on a sec, where did all these newly empowered potentials come from? I thought the ones in Sunnydale were the only ones the bringers hadn't killed?
Willow looked like a really old woman there, but I guess it was supposed to be the opposite to Dark Willow. The good witch look really suits Willow. Willow's dye job is better than Spike's. Mystical is obviously better than Wella. I liked Willow in the glowing white and the contrast with Dark Willow of the black hair. But could they not have found a more flattering wig? Otherwise, she looked rather pretty.
Bonus point for the word ‘nifty’. It was the rather hyper snickering as she toppled over that really had me giggling.
Ah, bunnies. That’s the key to spur Anya on. Anya discovers the "Call me Mr. Flopsy and die." philosophy
I would just like to take a moment to appreciate the shots of the men folk fighting. They were swashing their buckle well, so to speak. I love a man with a sword.
I love the way Andrew tries to excuse himself out of being slaughtered to death.
Behind you! Well, you should have been on the job, not yelling about it
Faith gently reminds Buffy she coped a lot better with being stabbed in the stomach.
I thought for a moment they were killing Buffy off, what with the so-called ‘mortal wound’. The passing of the scythe amongst the Slayers was a nice touch - they’re all equally entitled to use it now.
Ow! That had to hurt.
Oh! Anya! I know that someone had to die, but I did quite like her. How fitting that Anya’s last word was ‘bunnies’
Principal Wood! Not you too! No! I like Principal Wood. Oow. That looked sore. Nice moves from Giles there as he swings, kills the vamp, and catches Wood.
The first sounds very squeaky voiced today.
Slow-mo Buffy, this must be important/meaningful. Oooh, the Dramatic Orchestral music is starting up. Things must getting even more serious.
Spike is either being ‘purified’ or ‘bubble washed’ according to Angel. Either way, it looks like it stings.
They're destroying the school again. Good for them
How lucky there was a form of mass transportation with the keys in the ignition within running distance. I plotholed that either Wood/Giles thought that there would need for evacuation at some point and had it ready prepared, or Giles hotwired it, using the Ripper skills we know he has.
James Masters looks fantastic bathed in sunlight.
Good old Spike going out on an Alice Cooper track. Staying true to his proffered era of music then?
Oh yes, this is the perfect time for a heart-to-heart conversation. Move it! Run you stupid girl! Run!
That’s the second time Buffy’s sacrificed her boyfriend to save the world. It’s a worrying trend.
Sunnydale High goes boom again. Oh, my god, it just occurred to me that they made Spike into an actual blond bombshell
School buses do not go that fast.
onsidering her ‘mortal wound’, Buffy’s sprinting remarkably well. My God, Buffy could run in those shoes? She really is a superhero.
Buffy escaping from Sunnydale is probably some of the most ropey CGI I’ve seen on the show ever.
How does Buffy stay on the bus when it stops suddenly?
Actually, all Sunnydale going boom. Bit more drastic this time. And they even got the welcome sign! I love the sign that falls in the crater.
Oh, Andrew’s tiny bit of heroism started me blubbering.
That was a truly... son of a bitch! I was just about to comment on how well Principal Wood died, and he... Geaagh! Is it any consolation that he had me fooled too?
Poor Giles, “There’s another one in Cleveland”. The watcher strikes again.
“We saved the world” - I think that merits an ‘Again’.
I don’t think that could’ve been done any better. I can’t believe it’s all over now. On the whole, a pretty good finish to the series. This would really be a moment for Sky to let the titles run without a trailer. Unfortunately, it’s Sky, so not a chance.
We saw his face! The Grr! Argh! Monster showed us his face!

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