WARNING ! YOU ARE NOW ENTERING THE TASTELESS ZONE!
(A selection of "adult" jokes. Nothing to do with NIT or football, just sixth form juveline humour)
Q. How do you annoy your boyfriend during sex?
A. Phone him!
Q. How do you make a dog drink?
A. Put it in a liquidiser
Q. What does an elephant and milk have in common?
A. They both come in litres
Q. What is pink and hangs out your trousers?
A. Your mum
Q. What do you get if you cross a rotweiler with a labrador?
A. A dog that scares the shit out of you, then gets the toilet roll!
Stephanie, the rather well-endowed but incredibly stupid hibs fan spent almost all of her holiday on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bikini the first day, but on the second she decided that since no-one could see her up on the roof she would take the bikini off to get an overall tan. She had hardly began when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was lying on her stomach so she just pulled a towel up over her rear.
"Excuse me miss" said the flustered assistant manager " We don't mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would appreciate it if you could wear your bikini like yesterday"
"What difference does it make" Stephanie asked "no-one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel"
"Not exactly" said the sweaty man "you are lying on the dining room skylight"
Mail to Grant Thorburn
grant.thorburn@ukonline.co.uk