______ _______ ____ ------ / / // ____// |---------------------------------------------- U K / / // ___/ / / ' March 24th, 1998 / / // / / / / N E T W O R K part 1 Issue 90 --- (_____//__/ -- (_____/------------------------------------------------ The United Kingdom UFO Network - a free electronic magazine with subscribers in over 40 countries. This issue comes in 3 parts. If any part is missing please mail: ufo@holodeck.demon.co.uk giving the issue number. The issue will be reposted to you. Please put the details as below in the subject section e.g. Repost {90} part 1, part 2 or part 3. In this issue: Editorial --------- UK.UFO.NW social meet in Birmingham (UK) UK.UFO.NW now has a new IRC (internet relay chat) home Future UK.UFO.NW IRC guests United Kingdom News -------------------------- [UK 1] Strathclyde jolted by mysterious tremors [UK 2] UFOs seen over Bedford and Immingham [UK 3] Ten luminous UFOs hover over Glasgow [UK 4] UK men spot a UFO over Great Bently, Essex [UK 5] Sighting over Dunlop, Erdington, Birmingham [UK 6] Sighting M6 motorway [UK 7] Sighting over Small Heath, Birmingham [UK 8] Flying Triangle over M5 Motorway [UK 9] Hoped that Little Green Men will visit the Millennium Dome [UK10] Sunrise of the new Millennium [UK11] New book claims ETs are secretly among us World News -------------- [W 1] The cloning continues [W 2] Potatoes fight against cholera [W 3] Steve Schiff Won't Run Again [W 4] Red faces at the Pentagon as hackers drop in on the military [W 5] Probe finds water on the moon [W 6] German Cult Members Released [W 7] Jack Shulman's open letter to President Clinton [W 8] Nasa bids Pathfinder farewell [W 9] End of the world? Asteroid to hit Earth in 2028? [W 10] Biggest UFO conference ever, Brasilia, December 1997 [W 11] Flaming objects over California [W 12] God will speak on all TVs March 24th 1998 Book serialisation ------------------ A FEARFUL SYMMETRY A TRUE STORY OF ALIEN INTRUSION INTO HUMAN LIVES By D. Lynne Bishop Alien Humour ------------ A light-hearted look at ufology Editorial ====== UK.UFO.NW social meet in Birmingham (UK) If anyone lives in or near to Birmingham in the UK and would like to get together for an evening's informal, friendly, social chat about our favourite subject then please contact us. The venue, which still has to be decided, will be a pub somewhere in Birmingham. For further information please mail: ufo@holodeck.demon.co.uk Please put as your subject heading: Birmingham meeting --- UK.UFO.NW now has a new IRC (internet relay channel) home UK.UFO.NW are pleased to announce that we now have a new IRC home situated on the Chatnet servers, thanks to the hard work of Crow and Raine our IRC experts. Nothing else has altered. All meeting times remain the same. All meetings commence on Saturdays at 11pm (UK time). For the equivalent time in your part of the world please mail: ufo@holodeck.demon.co.uk with IRC WORLD TIME in the subject header. In the main mail include your: Country / Location / Nearest major city. For any help on connecting to our meetings via the IRC please send your questions to: ufo-irc-advice@crowman.demon.co.uk 16 bit and 32 bit versions of probably the best IRC software (MIRC) will shortly be available for download fully configured for connection. For those of you with IRC programs you will find a full list of Chatnet servers at the foot of this e-zine. --- Future UK.UFO.NW IRC guests Saturday 28th March 1998 - Ros Renalds "1982 late Sept. We decided to visit the relatives in Corby Northant's and at around 8pm we had arrived at Sudbury Suffolk. As we approached, a horseshoe shaped group of lights flew very low over the car at the same time that we passed under some power cables. I remember the lights, the silence and the blue tendrils bouncing off the cables, my first though was "Helicopter" but everything was wrong, it's movement, speed, silence etc. As we drove out through the town, through Long Melford and headed along the Claire to Haverhill Rd, it came back and zipped over the car 2 or 3 times scaring the pair of us." Ros arrived at her destination nearly four hours late. She will be telling us of her experiences and answering your questions live at our moderated meeting on Saturday 28th March. --- Saturday 4th April 1998 - Nick Redfern Nick Redfern UK ufologist and author of new book 'A COVERT AGENDA' "For almost half a century, you have been denied access to the facts which lie behind discoveries of monumental proportion." Nicholas Redfern The shocking truth of the British Government's UFO conspiracy is revealed for the first time in... A COVERT AGENDA WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY NICK POPE A conspiracy of silence has existed at the highest levels of the British Government to prevent the general public from learning the shocking facts which lie behind one of the most emotive issues of our time - unidentified flying objects. Now, the truth can be told. Nick will be answering your questions live in a moderated meeting on Saturday 4th April 1998. United Kingdom News =================== uk.ufo.nw says: It has not been so quiet in the UK these last few weeks. Here are a number of reports from various sources. [UK 1]****** Source: East Kilbride News Publish Date: 30th December 1997 From: UFO Roundup volume 3, number 2 Issue date: 11th January 1998 STRATHCLYDE JOLTED BY MYSTERIOUS TREMORS Strange earth tremors have rocked Scotland's Strathclyde region twice in the past couple of weeks. In mid-December, a strong tremor shook the multi-million-pound Centre One building in Stewartfield. "More than 30 Inland Revenue (the UK's tax agency--J.T.) workers were evacuated... Desks rocked, computer screens flickered and windows rattled as employees were whisked to a safety zone. The tremor triggered emergency readings at several seismological stations in Scotland." During the early hours of Monday, December 22, 1997, a second round of tremors struck the East Kilbride area, 30 miles (48 kilometers) southeast of Glasgow. "Frightened residents in Greenhills, Westwood and Calderglen have reported another round of tremors...A number of people called the (East Kilbride) News to say they had been all shook up by a quake in the early morning hours..." "'It was like a low overhead thunder directly above the house,' said Aileen Wilson, 39, from Gasgoyne, Westwood. She said that she "feared for her seven- month-old baby daughter when the tremor started just before 7 a.m." The tremor "'was followed by a series of noises like fireworks going off,' she explained, 'It sounded like a gas explosion coming from the Westwood playing fields. I jumped out of bed and lifted my baby Lynsay. Everything in the room was shaking. It lasted quite a long time.'" "Thomas Stewart, 39, from Carnoustie Drive, Greenhills, heard deafening whirring noises when his windows shivered violently around 7 s.m." '"It sounded like a rocket,' said the Ministry of Defence worker. 'I'm puzzled as to what exactly is going on and would like an answer."' "Glenn Ford of the British Geological Survey in Edinburgh said, 'This was NOT an earthquake and went on for too long for a sonic boom. It is very strange, but we are getting readings on our instruments, but the actual cause remains a mystery so far." (See the East Kilbride News for December 30, 1997, "Mystery Tremors," page 3. Many thanks to Dean Ladds of Flying Saucer Review for forwarding this news article.) [UK 2]****** Source: UFO Roundup volume 3, number 3 Issue date: 18th January 1998 UFOs SEEN OVER BEDFORD AND IMMINGHAM, UK Two UFO sightings were reported in the United Kingdom last week, over Bedfordshire and Humberside. On Wednesday, January 14, 1998, at 6:10 p.m., Andi T. was in a car "near the roundabout (rotary) where the (Motorway) A6 Luton-to-Bedford road meets the Bedford By-pass" when a UFO flashed by overhead. The sighting took place about 60 miles (96 kilometers) north of London. "A bright light shot across the sky about a mile from the roundabout," Andi reported. "This light was like a shooting star except it lasted a lot longer and had a tail. Not long after I witnesses this light, I saw two lights at the horizon (near Bedford), but those objects didn't move any nearer to me." (Email Interview) On Sunday night, January 4, 1998, at about 11 p.m., a UFO described as "a yellow harvest moon" hovered above a residential neighborhood in Immingham, on the river Humber, approximately 75 miles (120 kilometers) northeast of Sheffield. The object was first seen by a woman in the house, who immediately called her relatives to come and look. Among the relatives was Paul H., a local skywatcher. "There was a harvest moon in the wrong part of the sky--too low, too large and too yellow," he said. "Whatever it was, it was at about rooftop height, under conditions of low cloud. We saw the 'moon' from upstairs, and from there the 'moon' appeared to be at the same elevation as us. It appeared to be big, as is a harvest moon, but the actual moon had already been seen about one hour earlier by me, much higher up in the sky. The (UFO's) colour was yellow. I got out my 30mmX30mm telescope for a better look." Paul estimated the UFO's size as "about ten meters (33 feet) in length." "After five minutes of discussion and telescope viewing, we checked from another angle from another room, but in the time I moved from one room to another, it had moved so as to be no longer visible... I went back to my room, and it appeared that the 'moon' was rapidly being covered by cloud--much like watching an eclipse," he noted, adding that, because of the overcast, "nothing was visible above 50 degrees" from the horizon. (Email Interview) [UK 3]****** Source: UFO Roundup volume 3, number 4 Issue date: 25th January 1998 TEN LUMINOUS UFOs HOVER OVER GLASGOW On Friday, January 16, 1998, at 7:45 a.m., Gordon MacAndrews and his wife Fiona were waiting for sunrise in Glasgow, Scotland when they spotted mysterious lights in the southern sky. "I viewed the lights from the top of a hill in the north of Glasgow," MacAndrews reported, "which overlooks the city, as the lights were some way off. As I mentioned in my post, my wife also saw the lights and was as mystified as I am." He described the UFOs as "whitish-yellow" and "smaller than a small coin" held at arm's length. "They did not approach; they stayed in the same area," over the southern suburb of Busby. From their observation point near Springburn Road, the couple "watched the lights for 20 minutes...As the sun rose, we were unable to see them any longer." "As I saw them from the other side of the city, I was sure someone else would have seen the display but apparently not," he added. Glasgow, Scotland's largest city, is about 55 miles (88 kilometers) west of the capital, Edinburgh. (Email Interview) [UK 4]****** Source: UFO Roundup volume 3, number 6 Issue date: 8th February 1998 UK MEN SPOT A UFO OVER GREAT BENTLY, ESSEX On December 3, 1997, at 8 p.m., two men, one 18, the other 34, were walking in Great Bently, Essex, about 55 miles (88 kilometers) northeast of London when they spied a strange light in the sky. "To start with, it was very small," the younger witness reported, "Only about the size of a normal aeroplane light. But as it got closer to us, it got bigger and at one point it was much bigger than a coin held at arm's length." "We saw it up close for thirty seconds, but it was in view for at least a few minutes. It passed directly overhead at one point. The colour was white. The object seemed to be giving out light all over its surface." "It came from the northeast and departed towards the southwest. It wasn't very high up. It was much lower than a normal plane, probably only about 100 feet (30 meters). It traveled much faster at first, but seemed to slow down when it passed over me." (Email Interview) [UK 5]****** The UK.UFO.NW are currently investigating three strange sightings in the West Midlands area of the UK during the months of January and February 1998. The UK.UFO.NW are currently investigating three strange sightings in the West Midlands area of the UK during the months of January and February 1998. Sighting over Dunlop, Erdington, Birmingham Sighting No. 1: At 6.20 am on Friday 9th January 1998, rubber worker Stephen was driving himself and his two pals Jim and Derek to work at Dunlop in the Erdington area of Birmingham. The Dunlop plant is part of a large built up area, which includes other factory units. Dunlop's makes rubber tyres for vehicle's including motor cars, racing cars and aircraft. It is also on a major flight path to Birmingham airport situated 5.25 miles away. Weather conditions on this morning were very good. It was dark. The sky was clear. Both the stars and moon were clearly visible. As they drove towards the entrance of Dunlop they saw a man standing on the street corner looking into the night sky. They followed his gaze and saw a stationary single flashing red light. The darkness behind the light appeared to show the outline of an aircraft or it may have been a triangular shape? Work time was pressing so they had to move on. Unfortunately the man standing at the corner has not as yet been identified. Although a busy airline route Steve who is an avid aircraft spotter and knows his planes stated "It had only one flashing red light on and the rest was in darkness. I'm not sure what it may have been". UK.UFO.NW are continuing with enquiries. [UK 6]****** Sighting M6 motorway Sighting No. 2: At 5.23 am on Saturday 10th January 1998, traffic warden Margaret was driving north along the M6 motorway between junctions 3 and 4 towards Birmingham airport approximately 7 miles away. Weather conditions on this morning were very good. It was dark and clear. There were no motorway lights at this point. In the distance at an angle of approximately 40 degrees through her vehicles front windscreen she saw an oblong shape stationary in the air. She viewed the object for 30 seconds before it moved away retrospectively into the distance. Margaret who has worked at Birmingham airport for 7 years stated "I see aircraft everyday of my working life. The oblong shape of this was most unusual and not like any aircraft I have ever seen". UK.UFO.NW are continuing with enquiries, however it is worth bearing in mind that this sighting occurred only 24 hours after sighting number 1. We also found that the Goodyear blimp was in the UK for the first time in 20 years. It was seen later the same day over the Wolverhampton football field 20 miles from Birmingham airport. Margaret stated: "it was not a blimp." [UK 7]****** Sighting over Small Heath, Birmingham Sighting No. 3: At 6.00 pm on Friday 13th February 1998, June was in her neighbours south facing kitchen in the Small Heath area of Birmingham. Small Heath is approximately 3 miles from Birmingham airport. June stood in her next door neighbours kitchen with three other witnesses when they became aware of an extremely bright light that they could see due south through the kitchen window. It appeared to be hovering over Digby Park and remained there stationary for approximately 15 minutes. By naked eye the object appeared to be a diamond shape. When viewed through binoculars the object was too bright to define a shape. An aircraft was seen to travel towards it or at least in that direction. As it got closer the light from the object: "went out and it shot off but it shot off at such a speed and there was all sort or red lights on it" said June "actually the way it shot off I expected it to crash into the church at the top of the road and I ran actually from the back door to the front to see if I could still see it but it had gone." June told us that as the object moved off at speed a number of red lights could be seen which appeared to be moving around the object. UK.UFO.NW are continuing with enquiries. One point worth mentioning is that June who lives quite close to Birmingham International Airport is very used to seeing aircraft flying near to her house. She is also used to seeing the West Midlands Police helicopter with it's powerful search light. Her 'UFO' was not like any of these. [UK 8]****** From: thegreenhouse@netmatters.co.uk Dave Dunworth UK Director Skywatch International Incorporated Sighting Date: Monday 9th March 1998 uk.ufo.nw would like to thank Dave Dunworth for sending this report to us. Flying Triangle over M5 Motorway Report submitted by Dave Dunworth UK Director SI Inc This report came in at 23:15 09 March 1998 At aprox, 19:45 until 20:00 last night Monday 09th March 1998 a Mr M Peast Mr D Matthews and Mrs J York were travelling south bound on the M5 Motorway heading towards Exeter UK SW. They were aprox 39 Miles from Exeter when Mr Matthews spotted what appeared to be a star in the south at a height of about 30,000 feet. As he watched the star it began to move just like a conventional aircraft with no obvious signs of erratic movement or obvious navigation lights just a small glistening not unlike a star. Mr Matthews alerted his companions and asked for their opinion, all were watching to try and identify the object that resembled a star and hanging in the same position for the last 5 mins. As they travelled on the object manoeuvred around and descended about 3,000 feet to display an array of bright white lights with a red light in the centre or the tail section, it was difficult to be exact, as the object was some distance away at that time. They began to take all the information and asses what they were actually looking at, just then the craft descended from a height estimated at 25,000 feet to a height of 5,000 feet within a couple of seconds and displayed a vertical lift manoeuvre which showed the shape of the craft as being triangular, the lights on the craft by this time became much more discernible. The craft displayed three highly luminescent white lights that were very bright and in the centre there appeared to be a large section of reddish coloured light that pulsated in intensity. The craft was about the size of a jumbo jet in our estimation although it was difficult to give an accurate account of its size. As the craft climbed they described seeing a small kind of yellow and orange glowing ball that dropped from the reddish area of the craft. This glowing balls of light shot off at high speed towards the south and was immediately followed by the triangular shaped craft. The ball compared to the craft was about the size of a tennis ball but as it moved so fast it's hard to give accurate information on the exact size. Both the craft and the ball of light rapidly disappeared from view into the night sky and all were left with an incredible feeling of wonderment at what they had seen. The motorway was steady with traffic and as this unfolded, other motorists must have also witnessed this because the traffic slowed down and everyone that passed us had their eyes on the sky at that time. We watched this for about 15 minutes and by the motorway signs had travelled about 9 miles at an average speed of 50 mph. Thanks to Mr Matthews who gave me this information. If anyone out there has also witnessed this event I would be very pleased to hear from you. Contact me at: thegreenhouse@netmatters.co.uk and don't forget us here at: ufo@holodeck.demon.co.uk [UK 9]****** Source: Teletext (ITV text service) Publish Date: Sunday 1st March 1998 Strange But True The Weird World This Week It is hoped that Little Green Men will visit the Millennium Dome. A punter stands to win 500,000 pounds (801,500 dollars) if little green men turn up to view the Millennium Dome after betting 10 pounds (16.03 dollars) that it will attract extraterrestrials. Bookmakers William Hill said George Vernon of Bristol had been given odds of 50,000/1 for his wager. Spokesman Graham Sharpe said "If he's right, he's going to be collecting a payment that's out of this world." [UK 10]****** Source: Teletext (ITV text service) Publish Date: Sunday 1st March 1998 Strange But True The Weird World This Week Sunrise of the new Millennium. This first sunrise of the new Millennium in Britain will be over the white cliffs of Dover - and not Lowestoft. Astronomers have calculated the tilt of the sun means dawn will break over the Kent coast at 7.58am on January 1st 2,000 ahead of the rest of south-east England. The news is a blow for Lowestoft, which had been billing itself as the place to be for the millennial sunrise. [UK 11]****** Source: The News Of The World Publish date: Sunday 1st February 1998 From: crow@crowman.demon.co.uk From: Lloyd@gwent-tertiary.ac.uk New book claims ETs are secretly among us............... By ROY STOCKOILL THAT neighbour you always thought was weird, the barman at your local who makes you uneasy, the boss who seems to be on another planet... it could he they're more spaced out than you feared. In his astonishing new book, Alien Base, best selling UFO expert Timothy Good demonstrates that extraterrestrials are living among us in secret bases all over Earth including Britain. Some of his chilling eye-witness accounts, documented over 40 years, indicate they are even able to take on human form. Today we present his evidence. But remember, the truth isn't necessarily out there it might be right under your nose! IT was a journey that newsagent Hubert Lewis had made hundreds of times before. Dawn had yet to break over the deserted country lane as he wearily powered his old bicycle through the wind and rain. All he could think of was getting to the Shropshire town of Church Stretton to collect the newspapers waiting there for him and getting home as quickly as possible. At first Lewis barely noticed the tall figure standing in the road ahead. But a second glance brought him stumbling to a halt-for hovering in the sky, to the right of the stranger, was a circular object, 60 to 100ft across. The panicking newsagent cried out, demanding to know who or what was there. But the tall figure answered him, saying there was "no need to be alarmed". Lewis recalled: "My visitor spoke quite clear English. He told me I had nothing to fear from the future. "He knew of my troubles and mentioned names of people I had known. He wished me well-then vanished." Thirty minutes had slipped by-and all the time the circular object had rotated above, whistling softly. A year or so later, in the summer of 1958, the Shropshire newsagent was confronted by another of the strange beings-this time in a field. The second stranger, says Lewis- who had taken on the appearance of a human male-claimed he was from Venus and that other aliens from his planet were living among us. It was arranged that Lewis would take the train to London to meet the alien, who brought with him a second visitor, a female. They were "well dressed, dark, with a likeness to Continentals." They went to Hyde Park and strolled for an hour by the Serpentine, then drove to Wanstead Flats. The three then went to a nearby cafe where the couple from Outer Space had tea and sandwiches. The three had further meetings over the next week before the aliens saw him off back to Shropshire. Lewis said: "There is much that I learned. Many spacecraft land on Earth. Many aliens are living among us-one can't tell the difference." Author Good agrees, saying: "The evidence suggests that several extraterrestrial races have established underground and undersea bases on Earth, perhaps as a centre of operations within the solar system." He tells how a Sheffield-based market researcher, Joelle, witnessed an alien known to her as Mark land in his spaceship in the Derbyshire Peak District in 1963. Over 15 months Joelle had several meetings with Mark and another alien, Val. They said they were from another solar system, but that their people had bases in South America, Australia and the Soviet Union. "Once they asked her to translate a Russian manuscript at the British Museum," Good says. "She cooked meals for them at her London flat. Both Mark and Val had perfect manners, enjoyed wine and had a great sense of humour." In 1976 Jan Siedlecki witnessed a saucer-shaped craft land in Leeds. Two 4ft humanoid figures appeared. One said in English: "we apologise for the intrusion." Siedlecki says they showed him over the spaceship. Aliens were gathered around a circular pool containing a black, bubbling, oil-like substance from which flashes of red light darted in the air. A former equerry to the Queen says he had a two-hour conversation with an alien called Janus in 1954. The extraterrestrial made a request that stunned Air Marshal Sir Peter Horsley-he wanted to meet the Duke of Edinburgh. The former Deputy Commander-in-Chief of Strike Command, now in his seventies, says he ruled out such a meeting for security reasons. One alien's visit to Earth ended when he was beaten to death with a stick by a teenage boy, according to a report from Puerto Rico. Chino Zayas came across a group of creatures going into a cave in mountains behind Santiago in 1980. Sergeant Benjamin Morales of Salinas police said: "It had a head too large for its body and pointy little ears. Its skin was greyish green. Preserved............... Chemistry professor Calixto Perez, who examined the body, said: "In my opinion it was extraterrestrial." The creature was preserved in a glass jar at the Zayas home. One day men claiming to be from the US space agency NASA called and took it away, say the family. Puerto Rico has long been regarded as a possible site for an alien base. For four decades there have been reports of disc-shaped spacecraft. But sightings literally cover the globe. In Italy, photographer Filiberto Caponi claims to have met an alien creature several times outside his house in Abruzzo. He captured it on Polaroid film in 1993. Adapted from 'Alien Base: Earth's Encounters With Extraterresinals' by Timothy Good. To be published by Century on Thursday, 15 pounds and 99 pence. World News =3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D=3D [W 1]****** Source: Teletext (ITV text service) Publish Date: Sunday 1st March 1998 Strange But True The Weird World This Week The cloning continues. First there was Dolly the cloned sheep. Now the frontiers of science are being pushed forward by Mr Jefferson the calf. The birth of the healthy 98lb Holstein was announced by scientists at PPL Therapeutics, the company that brought Dolly into the world. It said the calf was produced by it US subsidiary in Virginia and delivered at Maryland College of Veterinary Medicine. [W 2]****** Source: Teletext (ITV text service) Publish Date: Sunday 1st March 1998 uk.ufo.nw publishes the below report because it never ceases to amaze us just what science and medicine are capable of. Strange But True The Weird World This Week Potatoes fight against cholera. US researchers say they have genetically engineered potatoes to carry a vaccine against cholera. The development creates the possibility that people could be inoculated by eating chips (french fries). "We anticipate that this system will be very useful in economically developing areas where cholera is endemic," said a university in California spokesman. [W 3]****** Source: The Associated Press Date: January 1998 From: Lloyd Bayliss Steve Schiff Won't Run Again By REBECCA ROLWING Steve Schiff said Friday he won't seek re-election in the fall because of his battle with skin cancer. The five-term Republican, diagnosed a year ago, has been absent from Congress since April. ``Because I have not yet recovered from my illness as anticipated, I must regretfully announce that I will not be seeking re-election in 1998,'' he said. Schiff, 50, is scheduled for a third round of chemotherapy next week to treat squamous-cell skin cancer, which spread from his ear to his face. Squamous cell is considered one of the more treatable forms of cancer, but the congressman said he has a particularly aggressive case. As one of two Republicans on the ethics subcommittee that investigated Newt Gingrich last year, Schiff signed a letter to fellow Republicans declaring they knew of no reason why he should not continue as House speaker. The letter was instrumental in helping the GOP leadership build support for Gingrich's re-election. In 1993, Schiff asked the General Accounting Office for information about the so-called UFO crash in Roswell in 1947, stirring up a new round of investigations of extraterrestrial visits. Schiff was first elected to the House in 1988, succeeding Manuel Lujan Jr., who was appointed interior secretary under President Bush. Before that, Schiff was district attorney in Bernalillo County. [W 4]****** Source: The Times Interface Publish Date: Wednesday 4th March 1998 Red faces at the Pentagon as hackers drop in on the military The sleepy Californian town of Cloverdale, north of the Golden Gate Bridge, awoke one morning last week to find the FBI roaming it's streets. Two students from the local high school had orchestrated what Defence Department officials called "the most systematic attack the Pentagon has seen to date." During February, the hackers logged on to at least 11 Air Force, Navy and Marine computer systems but, according to the Pentagon, the intruders got no further than unclassified files - although they did leave trap doors so they could return. The US military, which spends one billion dollars a year to protect itself from hackers, says it thinks the spate of attacks it has seen from many sources is unrelated to the tensions in the Persian Gulf. But more embarrassing than that naivety is the fact that the US Air Force had flagged February as Computer Security month. [W 5]****** Source: The Times newspaper Publish Date: Friday 6th March 1998 Probe finds water on the Moon By Nigel Hawkes Science Editor An American spacecraft has discovered water on the Moon, scientists announced yesterday. The water is scattered in small pockets over a large area around the north and south poles. It is found in craters, where deep shadow has protected it from direct exposure to the sun. The satellite, Lunar Prospector, was launched in January and went into orbit around the Moon. The first results from its instruments were announced at a press conference at Nasa's Ames Research Centre in Moffett Field, California. The north pole appears to have about twice as much water as the south, the results show. In total, there appear to be between 11 million and 330 million tons of water spread over the two poles. If it could be exploited - a big if, as it appears to be rather thinly dispersed - 33 million tons of water, towards the lower end of the estimates, would support 1,000 two-person households for over a century, without recycling. To lift the equivalent amount of water into Earth orbit would cost at least $60 trillion (=A336.5 trillion). The water could also be used as a source of oxygen for breathing, and to make both oxygen and hydrogen to use as a rocket fuel. It would enormously enhance the prospect that the Moon could be colonised, or used as a base for further space exploration. The presence of water also hints at the remote possibility of simple forms of life. Water is essential to life: without it, none can exist. With it, the possibility exists of some simple life forms such as bacteria, possibly beneath the surface. The water has been found using a neutron spectrometer which detects neutrons bouncing from the lunar surface as a result of cosmic ray bombardment. The neutrons carry the signal of hydrogen, which can be used as a signature for the presence of water. "Our data are consistent with the presence of water ice in very low concentrations across a significant number of craters," said Dr William Feldman, a spectrometer specialist from Los Alamos National Laboratory in New Mexico. The estimate is that the ice is mixed with the rocky soil, at a ratio of only 0.3 to one per cent. This would mean that it would have to be "mined" from the soil, rather than simply collected like ice. At the north pole, the ice is found over an area of 18,000 square miles, while at the south pole it is dispersed across about 7,200 square miles. The most likely source of the water is comets, which are "dirty snowballs" containing a lot of ice. Over billions of years, huge amounts of water could have reached the Moon through cometary impacts, but the bulk has disappeared. Dr Jim Arnold of the University of California at San Diego has estimated that the maximum amount that could conceivably be present on the Moon as a result of impacts over the past two billion years would be between 11 billion and 110 billion tons. That assumes that the water lies in the top two metres of soil. The Lunar Prospector neutron spectrometer signal can penetrate only about half a metre, so there could be considerably more water present than it has found - perhaps four times as much. But Dr Feldman and Dr Alan Binder of the Lunmar Research Institute in Gilroy, California, caution that their estimates could be wrong by a factor of ten in either direction. Dr Wesley Huntress, Nasa's Associate Administrator for Space Science, said that the results would cast light on the rate of cometary impacts in the history of the solar system. Lunar Prospector has also produced a new gravity map of the Moon, pinpointing concentrations of mass caused by lava which flowed into huge craters. It will remain 62 miles high for another ten months, before descending to as low as six miles above the surface to collect data at much finer resolution. [W 6]****** [edited for length] Source: Las Vegas Sun Publish Date: 13th January 1998 From: bernhard.nahrgang@ob.kamp.net (Bernhard Nahrgang) German Cult Members Released Nineteen Germans linked to a suspected doomsday religious sect were released without charge Tuesday, a day after being arrested for allegedly planning to take part in a mass suicide. The 19, including three children, were taken into custody late Monday after police searched a house owned by their jailed leader, said Mari Paz Bernal, a spokeswoman for the Interior Ministry. The leader, Heide Fittkau-Garthe, was arrested last week and accused of an earlier plot to lead her 31 followers in a mass suicide. According to police, the original scheme called for the followers to kill themselves on Jan. 8 -- the day they reportedly believed the world would end. The followers, police said, believed a space ship would come and pick up their bodies at Teide mountain on Tenerife, one of seven islands in the Canary archipelago, located off the northwest African coast. The sect, whose name was not released, has been linked to the Order of the Solar Temple, whose followers have carried out mass suicides in Canada, France and Switzerland. During their search of Fittkau-Garthe's home, police discovered a child's drawing of a UFO and then concocted the space ship story, he says. [W 7]****** Source: American Computer Company (ACC) Url: http://www.accpc.com/openreward.htm Home url: http://www.accpc.com/ ACC's Roswell url: http://www.accpc.com/roswell.htm Letter date: 23rd February 1998 Jack Shulman's open letter to President Clinton American Computer Company 6 Commerce Drive, 2nd Floor, Cranford, N.J. 07016 (800) 850-7710 sales dept. (908) 272-0016 tech. support A Quality PC, Laptop & Network Server Systems Integrator & Computer Manufacturer February 23rd, 1998 DELIVERED BY PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT HON. PRESIDENT WILLIAM JEFFERSON CLINTON THE WHITE HOUSE 1600 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE NORTHWEST WASHINGTON, DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA 20500-0001 Dear Mr. President: In a recent appearance, you told a citizen of the Russian Republic, a young person, that there was no "UFO" that landed near Roswell, N.M. in 1947. Then, speaking more frankly, you admitted that you tried to find out, and that the Defense Department either didn't or wouldn't tell you. I think my point to you that this issue is one of those issues that could potentially unite our fragmented world together, is well taken by the young lady's question in that far off land. For the Record: all of us, at ACC (and I think a very large number of Americans) who believe this entire issue is still an open question, STRONGLY RECOMMEND YOU CHANGE YOUR OFFICIAL PUBLIC POSITION ON THE QUESTION OF WHETHER THE DEFENSE DEPARTMENT, THE PENTAGON AND THE AIR FORCE, HAVE A SPACE CRAFT OF EXTRA- TERRESTRIAL ORIGIN. SEVERAL NOTED PERSONS FORMERLY EMPLOYED BY THE US GOVERNMENT WOULD DISAGREE WITH WHAT YOU SAID TO THAT LITTLE RUSSIAN GIRL! In support of this end, the American Computer Company is offering a reward to the Public as set forth here. The American Computer Company hereby offers a $1,000,000 REWARD to the first person who provides us confidential information which leads to the exposure of the whereabouts and leads to the public viewing of an Extra-Terrestrial Space Craft, that is: a Space Craft or other Flying Object designed and built by other than Humans or Human employed robotic devices, such as may be in the possession of the United States Department of Defense, the United States Army, United States Air Force, The Pentagon, or any other Agency or Organization of the United States Government. Said reward is to be paid upon formal verification by Public Auditors employed by the American Computer Company, and General Public viewing of the Craft. Excluded from the right to collect this reward are all employees of the American Computer Company and their families, and any person for whom such a reward would be prohibited by law. Mr. Clinton, we politely remind you of your OATH OF OFFICE, in which you agreed to uphold the Laws of the United States of America, one of which laws PROHIBITS YOU FROM LYING TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. Sincerely, Jack A. Shulman President American Computer Company [W 8]****** Source: Teletext (ITV text service) Date: 11th March 1998 Nasa bids Pathfinder farewell Scientists have declared the Mars Pathfinder craft "dead" after the end of a mission that produced the closest look at the red planets surface. Team members at Nasa's Jet Propulsion Laboratory said goodbye to the lander and it's little rover Sojourner 250 days after it's landing on July 4th last year. The farewell came after the team got no response to one last set of commands. [W 9]****** Source: The Mirror newspaper (UK) Publish date: Friday 13th March 1998 End of the world? A 6.30pm on October 26th 2028, a mile-wide asteroid with the destructive power of two mllion Hiroshima bombs is coming.. By Mark Dowdney Foreign Editor A mile-wide asteroid could be on a collision course with Earth - threatening to wipe out civilisation 30 years from now, scientists revealed yesterday. The impact, at more than 17,000mph, would cause an explosion equivalent to two million Hiroshima sized bombs. These would be the consequences of the space-rock catastrophe "timetabled" by astronomers to possible happen in 2028: HUGE Earthquakes would be triggered and the blast heat would cause volcano-like meltdown. DUST clouds would blot out the sun, plunging the earth into a prolonged cosmic winter. MILLIONS would die in a total collapse of society. The exact arrival time of asteroid Armageddon is calculated at 6.30pm on October 26th, 2028. And British scientist Dr Benny Peiser said yesterday: "It would not necessarily mean the end of mankind, but it would wipe out civilisation as we know it. "We would regress to the level of the Dark Ages. All the trappings of modern life would be totally gone." The danger was detected three months ago by astronomers at the University of Arizona in America. They run a spacewatch programme to spot and plot the course of objects which might threaten Earth. Codenamed 1997 XFII, the mega-menace was added to the list of 108 asteroids - small planets orbiting the sun - which are considered "potentially hazardous". Early calculations produced a "miss distance" from Earth for XFII of 500,000 miles...which sounds a long way, but is less than any other previous prediction for an asteroid. Further observation suggested an approach to within 30,000 miles of Earth. Now the International Astronomical Union is warning: "There's a small chance, not entirely out of the question, of an actual collision." US asteroid specialist Jack Hills said: "This is the most dangerous one we have found so far. It scares me. It really does." If it landed at sea - in the Atlantic, for example - the coasts of America and Europe would be devastated by monster tidal waves. Dr Hills said: "Where cities stood, there would be only mudflats." On land, the explosion would leave a crater more than 10 miles across. Everything for hundreds of miles around would be destroyed. At present the XFII asteroid is seen by observers as a pinprick of light among many others. It's size is estimated from the amount of sunlight reflected from it. It will move out of view of all but the largest telescopes over the next few months. Only by the year 2002, will astronomers be able to asses the risk accurately. British scientist Dr Peiser, an anthropologist at Liverpool's John Moores University, has made a special study of asteroid impacts. He starkly spelled out the Armageddon scenario: "The effect of a one mile-wide object hitting the Earth would be catastrophic on a global scale. "There would be a complete collapse of society and the abandonment of agricultural settlements." There is one ray of hope - a space mission could be launched to deflect the asteroid. Blowing it up would only produce a shower of fragments, which could themselves present a danger. The odds on a collision are put at 1,000-1. But seasoned punters were last night wondering if either they or the bookies would still be left standing for any payout... ROCKS from space have been hitting the Earth for millions of years, ranging from pebble-sized meteorites to asteroids up to 10 miles wide. ONE of the latter is believed to have wiped out the dinosaurs 65 million years ago. TWENTY-three meteorites are known to have hit Britain since 1623. The largest, weighing about 46 kilos, broke up before impact at Barwell, Leics in 1965. THE biggest rock this century hit Siberia in 1908 killing 1,000 miles of forest. The blast was heard 600 miles away. [W 10]****** Source: UFO Magazine (UK) Publish date: March/April 1998 url: http://www.ufomag.co.uk/ From: duncan@life.com (information taken from a full and very informative report) The biggest UFO conference in history took place in the capital city of Brasilia between 7 - 14 December 1997. UFO Magazine was present throughout to cover proceedings of this momentous event. 'Graham W. Birdsall' History in the offing? Among the most intriguing comments to be made at the Forum, were those uttered by Russian Cosmonaut Alexandr Balandine, who spent six months aboard the Mir space station. He had travelled to Brazil with his fellow countryman and UFO researcher, Boris Chourinov. I noticed that Alexandr delivered his speech from prepared text, which came as no great surprise. Alexandr had already made numerous visits to and from the Russian Embassy, always collected and returned in a diplomatic vehicle. Some of my fellow researchers didn't think this strange: "After all," they argued, "it isn't everyday that a Cosmonaut comes to town.. perhaps he is being feted by embassy staff." Possibly so, but one can be quite certain that that his speech will have been vetted, making what he had to say in public all the more remarkable. Alezandr confirmed that former Soviet and now Russian cosmonaut's had seen and recorded numerous anomalous objects in space for many years. He went on to describe several of these, but then made two telling remarks: Alexanr said, "We Cosmonaut's had a golden rule." During their training programme they were told: "If you see something very strange, keep watching it, because you may never see something like it again...." He then went on to announce that "future anomalous images observed and/or recorded in space would be shared between the Russian Space Agency, NASA, and a special forum of UFO researchers." This was an incredible announcement, made all the more so if sanctioned by senior Russian aides. As is often the case at events such as these, the implications of what had been announced was lost among many present. I had to seek clarification, just in case our interpreter had made a mistake. I spoke with Peter Davenport, who once served with the US military while stationed in Moscow some 25 years ago. He concurred that Alexandr had made such an announcement, the ramifications of which have yet to unfold. The following day over breakfast, and with Boris Chourinov acting as interpreter, I engaged myself in a very fruitful conversation with Alexandr, who resides with his family in one of two special "space cities" built outside Moscow for current and past employees of the Russian space programme. Without going into specifics, it soon became clear that Alexandr was disenchanted with the current economic plight back home. He told me that he and his family struggle to make ends meet on a mere 50 dollars pension paid each month. A proud man, here was a hero of the Russian Federation who seemed ill at ease at having to attend a UFO conference on the other side of the world, but nonetheless remained adamant that some UFOs, reportedly seen by American astronauts and Russian cosmonaut's, were very real. Interestingly, when I raised the possibility that some of these UFO sightings could be directly linked to both American and Russian 'Star Wars' programmes, neither man ventured and immediate comment. I pursued the matter and said: "Look, you know and I know that the United States has been putting up all manner of things in space which has nothing to do with scientific exploration, so it follows that the Soviet Union, and now the Russian Federation, must be similarly engaged?" Alexandr muttered something, and then Chourinov said: "Of course, we accept this. But some of the things seen have nothing to do with these. [W 11]****** Source: Teletext (ITV text service) Date: Saturday 14th March 1998 Flaming objects over California The sun had just set when the sky over Northern California was filled with flaming objects falling to the ground. Traffic came to a halt on Interstate 80 and police were flooded with calls about a possible plane crash. But a spokesman confirmed it had turned out to be "the king of all meteor showers" - a 200 mile swath stretching from Sacramento to Monterey. uk.ufo.nw says: Although the Teletext date of publication is 14th March 1998 and the reports are usually from the previous week we have no specific date for this 'shower'. Is there anyone out there that can pinpoint a date for us and perhaps forward a fuller report? [W 12]****** Source: The Fort Worth Star Telegram newspaper Publish date: 18th March 1998 UFO cult says God will speak on all TVs March 24th at midnight One week before God materializes March 31 in Garland, Texas, taking the physical form of a Taiwanese UFO cult leader, he will broadcast live at midnight on Channel 18, a spokesman for the group said yesterday. "It doesn't matter whether it's cable TV or regular broadcast TV," said Richard Liu of the God and Buddha Salvation Foundation. The TV set doesn't even need to be switched on when the clock strikes 12 next Tuesday, said Liu, a former English literature professor and poet who now speaks for Chen Hon-Ming, the group's silver-haired spiritual leader. "God will turn on the television sets and tune each TV in every house to Channel 18," Liu said. That's every set "in all the Americas" - North, South and Central, he said. And although most members of the Taiwanese cult speak only Chinese, God will be communicating in English, Liu said. The spokesman clarified that God will be heard, but not seen. The screen will be filled with pictures of Garland's leafy Ridgedale Drive where Chen has predicted God, assuming Chen's own outward appearance, will appear March 31, clone himself and speak any language. "God also will tell people how they should prepare themselves for his arrival," Liu said of the broadcast. "We don't have any further details." The Taiwanese, who number about 110 adults and 50 children, began arriving in the Dallas suburb last fall after Chen decided that Garland would be the spot where God would descend. To them, it sounds like "God-land," he explained at a December news conference. Chen's prophecies include a nuclear holocaust in parts of Asia with God manning a flying saucer to shuttle between the continent and Gary, Ind., saving lives --- A FEARFUL SYMMETRY A TRUE STORY OF ALIEN INTRUSION INTO HUMAN LIVES By D. Lynne Bishop A FEARFUL SYMMETRY Copyright 1995 by D. Lynne Bishop All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying, recording or otherwise without prior permission of the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages. First Printing September 1995 Printed in the United States of America BOOKFINDER PUBLISHING http://bookfinder.simplenet.com/ Lynne Bishop's home page http://www.geocities.com/Athens/3862/ --- CHAPTER 12 As the hypnosis session drew to a close, I pondered the new information that had been unearthed. The memories I had consciously recalled prior to the regression had not altered under the hypnotic trance, and the additional data had fit concisely into a cohesive whole. The proof of this encounter was based not only on anecdotal memories, but was substantiated by physical evidence: the pain in my hands and body, the pulled threads in the bedsheets, and the stain on my nightshirt. As I contemplated the weight of the physical evidence, I recalled one other piece of substantiating information that had lain forgotten in my mind: the dog had been ill for several days following the encounter. She had eaten nothing unusual at home that could account for her ailing, yet she had been lethargic and sick at her stomach. The images I had seen during the regression, coupled with her illness, strongly suggested she had been an accidental tourist during this abduction. I was very disturbed by this possibility--taking innocent pets by design or by accident outraged me. With a fiendish delight, I hoped she had torn the aliens' ship apart and spilled every garbage can they had on board. On the return trip home, my husband, Jack, Mary, and I talked excitedly about the abduction phenomenon. We all realized what an opportunity lay before us--particularly if my abductions were to remain on a conscious level. Jack and Mary owned a videocamera, and could attempt to catch an abduction on film. My husband and I, while not owning a camera ourselves, could easily borrow my brother's. With eager anticipation, we planned the method by which at least one of us might obtain proof on camera. Full of optimism, we parted that day--certain that soon we would obtain incontrovertible proof of the reality of the aliens--proof that could be shared with others. Several days passed, and we checked regularly with Jack and Mary to see if anything had occurred. My brother's camera was on loan to his older daughter, but he assured us we could borrow it as soon as she returned it. In the meantime, the evidence from Jack and Mary's camera was slow in arriving. We shared their laughter as they described the boredom of watching hours of film containing nothing but themselves sleeping. A week passed by in relative calm, and I became lulled by the sameness of the daily routine. The night hours remained a time of unrest for me; a dark mystery housing the potential of that altered reality I had come to dread. Insomnia had become my permanent bed-partner. The last weekend in November passed without further incident, and my husband and I made plans to borrow my brother's camera for the following weekend. I felt strengthened by my resolve to take positive action against the unseen foe--and also felt a new sense of control over my reactions to the phenomenon. It was a heady combination-- and too good to last. Monday, the 30th, was one of those days where you fervently wish you'd stayed in bed. Nothing went right at my job, and by workday's end, I was tired and disgruntled. After a quiet supper, my husband began flipping channels on the television with the remote control. Irritated, I decided I would go to bed, to escape the strangled sounds of the changing channels. My husband joined me sometime later, and he easily fell asleep. I dozed fitfully on and off, watching the digital clock as the hours leisurely strolled by, and the first seconds of December 1 were heralded. At 1:00 A.M., I was completely awake and alert. Suddenly, with no warning, a wave of lethargy overcame me, and my eyes closed--as if an unseen force had sapped every atom of energy I possessed. My world spiraled inward as my sense of hearing disappeared, and I lost contact with my husband and the dog. Panicked and paralyzed, I struggled against the invisible bonds that held me tightly in check--knowing it was futile, but determined to try. I will never know what that alien presence felt that night--if it felt at all--as it disdainfully lifted the covers off my will-less body, lying there like a sacrifice upon an unconsecrated altar. Prolonging a soul-deep agony, the creature removed each blanket, one-by-one. And I counted them, one-by-one, praying the alien life-form would not reach the last one . . . praying that someone--something---would intervene before that creature and I had no barrier between us. My prayer lay fallow on the bedroom floor, as I arose from the bed, devoid of will--a marionette played by a master puppeteer. With my emotions clamoring inside, I was relieved when my consciousness finally faded to black. Struggling back to consciousness, my first clear view encompassed the gray back of an alien, gliding purposefully a few steps before me. The long-fingered hand of another alien rested lightly upon my right shoulder, and I could barely discern with my peripheral vision the shape of its owner, walking slightly behind me to the right. We were moving through a curved hallway, the walls and floor a ubiquitous gray color. Two arched doorways stood before us. As we neared the first door to the left, the alien in front of me entered. I paused, unsure of my destination. With an overwhelming concern, I thought, "But I don't know where I'm supposed to go. Which door am I supposed to enter?" Within my head, the answer came, "Continue to the second door." I moved forward again, relieved to have an answer. Somehow I had been told the first door led into the pharmacy area; the second into the examination room. My thoughts in a tumult, and powerless to object, I stepped into the second room. Haziness engulfed my senses as I passed the threshold, and I blacked out. I awoke to find myself prone on a table--another sacrificial altar-- and facing a doorway. In mounting horror, I stared, wide-eyed, as one of the gray's entered the room, approaching the table where I lay unable to move. The nonhuman creature held an object in its hand, and as it neared my feet, my fears overwhelmed me. Closing my eyes, I mentally drifted away. After an unknown passage of time, I regained consciousness. To my surprise, I was now in a large circular room with two tiers. In the center of the room was a large, raised platform that contained a tube- or cage-like structure, surrounded by a metal railing, with ramps leading down either side to the floor below. There were two doors on the left-hand wall below the platform. Dazedly coming to my senses, I realized I was standing in this cage-like structure. Frantic, I ran around the inside perimeter, looking vainly for an exit. The metallic structure appeared to have openings at regular intervals, but some strange force prevented my exiting the holding cage. As I desperately sought a way out of the tube, I saw innumerable aliens coming and going through the doors below. I slowed my frantic run to a steady pace, and noticed several aliens standing below the platform, watching my movements. No emotion flickered across their impassive faces; no pity registered in their staring, black, endless eyes. Feeling like a caged animal in a zoo, I came to a dead halt within the confining tube. Exhausted emotionally and physically, I angrily stomped toward one of the openings--and easily passed through it. My performance had come to an end, as far as I was concerned. I would not "jump through the hoop" for these inhuman creatures anymore. I stepped onto the platform, toward the railing, and watched in consternation as the aliens began departing the room. The sense of abandonment I felt struck like a physical blow. Forlorn and bereft, I raced toward the ramp leading down to the doors, intent on catching one of the entities. I had to let them know I was human--not one of them- -and they couldn't just leave me there. As my foot touched the ramp, I was accosted by my "Oriental" alien. Physically barring my entry onto the ramp, he reached toward me with his alien hands. I mentally cried out to him, "Please don't forget to take me home!", and he hugged me. Engulfed in that hug that broke the language barrier and spanned the gap between two distinct life- forms, I was comforted in a manner as ancient as the world. With a child's wonderment, I watched in awe as he transformed before my eyes--once an alien, now a tall, dark-haired older man. I sensed an abiding humor in his response to my heartfelt plea, "These humans . . . as many times as we've dealt with them, and they never seem to learn." My head swam, and I blacked out again. With no transition noted from the altered state to present reality, I was once again awake, in my bed. My husband's respirations came very faintly from beside me, and the dog lay quietly at our feet. With the hairs on the nape of my neck standing up, I slowly turned my head to glance at the digital clock by the bedside. It read 2:37 A.M. After several moments spent in calming myself, I heard my husband move in his sleep, and the dog snuggled deeper into the blankets at the foot of the bed. On edge, I watched the clock as the hours slowly passed and night faded into daybreak. While my husband and I prepared for work that morning, I related what had transpired that past evening. The encounter had left me depressed, and I had difficulty in expressing the elements that had caused my deep sadness. Having been raised a "military brat," I had grown up under the stricture of giving only "name, rank, and serial number" to the enemy. With human beings, this motto could easily be applied, but in dealing with telepathic creatures, it had no meaning. My private thoughts and feelings had been used to manipulate me, and I felt raped. I had, at least, been hugged afterward--but for what purpose? What astounding secrets could I divulge about the human race--and why would these entities be so intent on gathering information? None of it made sense. Alien Humour ============ Do you know what comes from outer space, and has Three Testicles? E.T: The Extra Testicle!! -- Two Aliens in Detroit Two Aliens land in Detroit, next to a Gas station. The Aliens waddle out of their ship and look around. The first thing they see that resembles a being is the Gas pump. The two Aliens approach. The first one says "Earthling take me to your leader!" He gets no response. The first Alien looks at his buddy then addresses the pump again. "Earthling, I said Take me to your leader!" Still no response. The first Alien then turns to the second and says "If this Earthling doesn't show me some respect I'm going to blast him!" . The second Alien replies "O.K. but, I'm just going to stand down on the next block." The first Alien looks a little puzzled, but waits for the other to waddle to the next block. He then addresses the pump a third time. "Earthling take me to your leader!" No response. The Alien then pulls out his ray-gun and shoots the pump. After the explosion the Alien gets up dusts himself off then goes down the block to his buddy, He then says to the second Alien "If you knew that was going to happen why didn't you warn me?" The second replies "I didn't know what was going to happen, but I'm not going to mess with anyone who's pe**s can hang to the ground, wrap around his body twice, and still stick it in his ear!" --------------------------------------------------------------------- UNITED KINGDOM UFO NETWORK STATEMENT uk.ufo.nw statement: The articles or text appearing within these pages are not necessarily the views or opinions of United Kingdom UFO Network. REPORTS Please forward all reports to: ufo@holodeck.demon.co.uk WWW Visit us on the World Wide Web at http://www.holodeck.demon.co.uk/ BACK ISSUES & FILES For information on receiving back issues and other files send mail with REQUEST INFO in the subject area to: ufo@holodeck.demon.co.uk IRC - (INTERNET RELAY CHAT) The meetings take place at 11pm (2300hrs) each and every Saturday night. Times will vary depending on your location in the world. 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