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DMI RECORDS PRESENTS
Created by David Bulmer
Boyband

DMI Records (in association with David Bulmer Management) is proud to present BoyBand, our latest pop sensations. BoyBand are a new concept in four-piece bands. They have four members;

Louis - The elder statesman of the band, at 22. He writes the songs, and nods his head a bit.

Tyler - 20 year-old Tyler hails from Cromer. He likes baggy pants.

Denton - Denton is also 20 years old. He waggles his hands and makes unexplainable finger gestures.

Jason - Jason is 21 and was born in Leicester. He used to play keyboard in his youth-club band, before joining BoyBand.

DMI Records, in an exclusive deal with The Wibble can now bring you not only the lyrics to their latest single "Christmas Number One", but also the music. Due to legal difficulties, we are unable to bring you the full mp3 of them singing the song.

Christmas Number One (7k MIDI)

Christmas Number One

We can appeal to any ages
We look like happy elves
We just sing other people's songs
'Cause we can't write them ourselves
You scream and yell when you see us coming
And don't stop 'till we're gone
We're a boy band, and we're Christmas number one.

We're friendly with TV producers
We still use words like "champ"
We think we're really sexy but
We're just overtly camp
We always mime at concerts and
We never sing along
We're a boy band, and we're Christmas number one

Hey look, we're men with bleach-blonde hair,
That must mean we're really hot
We make out we're talented
Although we're really not
We're not even singing this,
It's all done with robots
We're a boy band, and we're Christmas number one

We sing in only one octave
But we make sure you can't tell
We raise our arms while singing
So it looks like we do it well
In fact we're only dancers,
But it's dancing that will sell
We're a boy band, and we're Christmas number one

By looking shy and thoughtful
We can win your sorry hearts
We release the same old tripe
And it rockets up the charts
We will still assume we're good
When we're crumbling old farts
We're a boy band, and we're Christmas number one

We have guards and limousines
We're protected when it rains
We don't walk down public roads
Or ride on public trains
We don't give live interviews
'Cause we've all got bleach-blonde brains
We're a boyband, and we're Christmas number one

© 2000 David Bulmer Management BoyBand will be embarking on a worldwide tour of schools in the UK. Posters will be available. All schools must obey to a strict code of no fewer than 300 screaming girls, or the boys are obligated to not be available.