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Personal Advertisements (More of)
CRACK cocaine for sale. For novelty purposes only. We do not condone or sell illegal drugs. Except cocaine. Damn. BOX 6493 HORNY unicorn seeks Rhinoceros for fun times. No time wasters or hippos. BOX 5429 DESPERATE television station seeks low budget films featuring ladies with big breasts frolicking. Must be ITC friendly. BOX 4863 INFAMOUS f-list celebrity seeks minor occasions to appear at. Must have idiotic crowd of old ladies who will clap for the sake of it. Supermarkets/Village fetes preferred. BOX 6982
RUBIK'S cube isn't half as puzzling as this growth on my nether regions. Someone please examine me. Just use some rubber gloves. Urgh. BOX 3989 HATS Shat, and other not-quite palindromes a speciality at Rowd's Word Emporium. BOX 2561 UGLY bearded woman seeks ugly greasy haired alcoholic man for marriage and homelife on council estate with view to raising criminal children and living solely on benefits. BOX 2582 UGLY bearded woman seeks ugly greasy haired alcoholic man for marriage and homelife on council estate with view to raising criminal children and living solely on benefits and benefit fraud.. BOX 6862
News Chat RUBBISH comedian will work in downbeat clubs to downbeat clientele in delusion that he is any good. Mother-in-law jokes a speciality. Act now includes smokers cough and profuse sweating at no extra cost. BOX 4856

COMPULSIVE liar, and inventor of the telephone seeks ugly fat woman to make mad passionate love to and to spend his fortune on. BOX 3751

GENTLE Ben was an American children's TV show. BOX 2472