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In Memory of Tommy Fox (1981-2002) - Book of Condolence |
If you have any material or information you would like added to this site, please e-mail it to me at conrad@ziebland.com |
Message Archive:
Anon at 22:12:31 Tuesday May 16 2006 If There Are Roses In Heaven Will You Send One Just For Me So I Can Hold It Close To My Heart Where You Will Always Be I Will Lay It On My Pillow Each Night As The Angels Tuck Me In I Will Know That You Are Near Me And Feel Your Presence Once Again I Am Thankful For All The Years You Were There To Help Me Through I Will Always Remember “My Precious Brother” Whose Love Was Honest And True! Em Sister at 22:10:44 Tuesday May 16 2006 I Wish I Could See You One More Time Come Walking Through My Door But, I Know That Is Impossible I Will Hear Your Voice No More I Know You Can Feel My Tears And You Don’t Want Me To Cry Yet, My Heart Is Broken Because I Can’t Understand Why Someone So Precious Had To Die I Pray That life Will Give Me Strength And Somehow Get Me Through As I Struggle With This Heartache That Was Caused By Losing You emily sister! x at 21:52:58 Tuesday May 16 2006 I tell you goodnight with tears in my eyes, I wish I was there curled up by your side, I try to be strong But I'm not that tough Goodnight x dodge at 17:52:05 Monday May 15 2006 just read what i put properly and SORRY i was US looking down SOZ mark ( dodge ) at 17:49:18 Monday May 15 2006 elo m8 just sitting ere aving smoke remembering the days ov camdom, with u looking down at lisa lashes from the balcony and wat a view it was a tom! havnt been down 2 c u resently but will do next time i can and av a smoke coz im trying give it up but want 1 last 1 with u 4 old times mate. love u and we will c each other 1 day i know we will Simone at 12:37:37 Thursday May 11 2006 Hello Gorgeous Tommy, I was thinking about you so I thought id let you know. I sometimes sit and wonder where you'd be in life right now if you were still here, it upsets me so much to think you never had the chance to shine to your full potential, everyone has changed so much, we've all grown up and doing diffrent things, wish you were here to share it with us all, but as long as the stars are still shining we know you're up there watching - be good Tom x x Anon at 09:56:39 Friday March 31 2006 I love you x dodge at 17:15:18 Tuesday March 21 2006 elo dude 4yrs only yesterday i know u still partying somwhere aving it large like the old days at camdem miss u dude yu save a space 4 me ok i'll bring the smoke love u loads Amy at 13:17:12 Monday March 6 2006 I can't believe that it has been 4 years already, it still hurts like it was yesterday. You were such a good friend and I will miss you forever xx Amy xx Sister Em at 13:03:10 Monday March 6 2006 Hi tom, Sorry i didnt get to write yesterday, All your friends came down & we spent the day drinking & eating lots!! 4 Years has passed by & life still seems so wrong without you, I came to put my flowers down yesterday with mum & dad, Hope you liked them. Standing there staring at a stone with your name on does not help, because its just not you! I miss your face,voice & big smile more then ever & each day of waking up without you doesnt get any easier... I just want you to know that i love you dearly & your sadly missed. I cant express how i feel without you in my life & i cant explain to anyone how heartbreaking it is to have lost such a special brother...even now 4 years on... I Love You. x Jemma at 18:35:51 Sunday March 5 2006 Hey Tommy, oh my god i cant believe its been 4 years since you left us. I still remember that day as if it was yesterday saddest day of my life. I will never forget you tom. There is not a day goes past where i dont think of you. I miss you loads. Carry on looking down on us. Love you tom xxxx Anon at 10:20:47 Saturday March 4 2006 Hi tom, another year passed tomorrow without you, 4yrs. Will try to get and see you, I still miss you and talk about you. Love to your family will be thinking of you all. To my very special friend miss you mate xxxx Amy at 08:06:09 Monday December 5 2005 Its getting close to Christmas and another year has just rolled on by, but there hasn't been a moment of it that i haven't thought about you or missed you. You will always have a place in our hearts. xx Anon at 17:31:20 Thursday November 24 2005 Alright mate! I came to see you yesterday. There was so many flowers there for your birthday, I bet you had a good one, avin it large! I miss you all the time dude, there is so much that has changed since you have gone but I guess that is just what happens. Thanks for looking over us all, you have taught me so many things without even saying or showing me anything, if that makes sense. It does to me anyway. Anyway gotta go, peace. auntie Sarah at 08:11:24 Thursday November 17 2005 Hi Tom, I don't know if you can see what Conrad is up to but he has reached BASE CAMP 1 safe and well and he has some great photo's on the web site. The most special thing for me tho is that he has put some prayer flags for you at BASE CAMP which will fly in the wind forever for you. He is the only person I know that has been that close to you outside of an aeroplane and I know you would be really chuffed to think that you have some flags flying on Everest - the biggest mountain in the world. I love you so much Tom and miss you so so much. THank you for looking over Conrad on his expedition. love you. Sarah x TRADESTEVE at 20:30:30 Saturday November 12 2005 Happy Birthday raver! Missing you loads. Will come up and see you soon. Still think about you all the time. Every time I put on a hard house cd on in fact. Good thing you liked hard house...i would have had a hard job if had it country and western. Dont think i got any Dolly Parton. Trade had its 15th birthday 2 sun mornings ago. Yep, it started 5.30am old time as it was the day the clocks went back. So in typical mind bending style a simple thing as telling the time in trade becomes an ordeal. Half the club have changed their watches and the other half havent. In the end you just say "what the heck" and just get on with it. So we had Pete wardman at 12 noon followed by Rached Auburn right up to 2pm or 3pm old time. BONKERS!!!!! I felt you made sure I had a good time that night coz trade hasnt been around since Easter and i was a bit worried about how it was all going to go. The moment I got back home I thought of you so thanks for that ok. I hope you are still being your little cheeky self up there. You Tom will always be remembered and here is why. You made everyone around you happy. I only have to think of you when Im feeling a bit low and you cheer me up no end. Hope your family are ok! Promise to come and see you very soon. Take care raver! TRADESTEVE XXX Anon at 17:26:20 Saturday November 12 2005 Happy Birthday tom, 24 today, went to see you today your flowers are as beautiful as you were. loved and missed by all of us. You left behind our broken hearts And happy memories too. But we never wanted memories we only wanted you. xxxxxxx Jem at 17:23:00 Friday November 11 2005 Hello Tommy, i just wanted to say happy birthday for tomorrow. Me and em went out for her 20th last night had a right laugh and bumped into your mate chris! Havent seen him in years, he did not recognize emily at all!! She has changed so much little stunner now!! Its weird now that emily has just turned 20 and you left us at 20. Well tom i know you know this already but i'm thinking of you all the time. i love you as the big brother i never had! Well i hope you have a great party up there tomorrow night and come and visit soon. Love you with all my heart and always will.Love Jem xxxxxxx Emily-Sister at 12:04:21 Friday November 11 2005 Hello Tom, I Just want to wish you a very happy birthday for Tomorrow, Saturday the 12th! Your always on my mind, Im missing you alot recently, It seems as though ive been smacked in the face all of a sudden, I had my 20th On Tuesday & it doesnt feel right to be the same age already i didnt really want that birthday guess i was scared really. I Know you know exactly how i feel at the moment as your watching over me hopefully being my guardian angel! Life will never be the same without you, I miss you so much, I will come & see you tomorrow & lay my flowers for you, I seem lost for words, but as i said you know how im feeling, But i will get better, Not only for My Beautifull Parents, but most of all...You! I LOVE YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! XX Jem at 12:18:47 Saturday October 22 2005 Hey Tom, just wanted to say a quick hi, been thinking of you loads recently. Still missing you like mad i must come and see you soon, sorry i havent been down for a while. Well just wanna say you'll never ever be forgotten tom and we all miss you very very much. Not a day goes by where i dont think about you. Love you loads tom xxxx Emily-Sister at 22:26:09 Monday August 15 2005 Missing You Every Second, Every Minute, Every Hour Of Everyday, Thats All I Have To Say =o( x Amy at 13:07:17 Monday August 8 2005 hi babe, have been thinking about you whilst remembering the good times that we used to have at Peach, missing you loads now and forever xxx Emily ( Sister) at 19:33:12 Friday July 8 2005 Evening Tom, Just sitting here & wanted to write you a message, I think about you everday but youve been on my mind alot recently, I Am learning to drive in my car now & it seems so strange, I drove down last weekend & i parked my lil va va voom up & came to see you i sat with you, thought of you, & talked to you, thats all i can do now! I Felt a whole lot better once id left you there with a kiss to your stone, Day by day passes but you will never be forgotten. I Love You x X sabrina X at 13:18:52 Sunday June 19 2005 HIYA TOM HOW ARE YOU DOING UP THERE HOPE YOU ARE O.K MISING YOU LOADS THINKING OF YOU ALWAYS SORRY I HAVE NOT BEEN ON FOR A WHILE HOPE YOU DONT MIND YOU TAKE CARE UP THERE AND I WILL SPECK TO YOU AGAIN SOON LOVE YA LOADS SABRINA XXXX Emily..X Sister X at 17:28:48 Thursday June 2 2005 To My Dearest Brother Tom, I Havent written for a while, I dont like it when i leave you here with no messages, Seems so lonely! I just wanted to pop by & say a hello & send you all the huggles i can possibly send!! Im finishing work now so will write again soon! I just want you to know im always thinking of you & Missing You! Love You Lots Tom! x Anon at 21:43:05 Thursday May 5 2005 what a wonderful website sitting here reading all these lovely messages to tom a big void in so many peoples lives a great guy taken so young . Emily (Sis) at 21:45:22 Tuesday April 19 2005 Missing You...... sabrina at 16:19:48 Sunday April 3 2005 hello tom i am so sorrry that i have not been on for time but that dont mean i dont think about you everyday that god send's to as all i have got you a pome babe here go's i hope you like in hun (IN LOVING MEMORY OF YOU) YOU'LL BE FOREVER IN MY HEART) Time doesn,t seen to dull it It seems just like yesterday, When i cried a thousand tear drop Because you went away . People were supportive Trying to makethings right, But it didn't stop me crying every single night. I'll keep coming back to see you My soul mate and my friend, Every anniverary Untl my life come to it's end i love you loads babe you take of yourself up there and thank you for sending as such a lovley day i'm thinking about you always neave stop missing you babe love always sabrina xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Jem at 11:39:50 Thursday March 17 2005 Hey tom, i came to see you a couple of saturdays ago, your garden looks lovely. well i'm sure you know already but i passed my driving test on the 18th feb. i know you heard me that morning when i spoke to you askin you to look down on me. Tommy i'm always thinking of you and i will never stop missing you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Amy at 13:09:17 Friday March 11 2005 Hey hon, missing you loads at the moment, last week was especially hard. Unfortunately time doesn't seem to make it any easier for any of us. Thinking of you always xx Emily (Sister) at 17:32:11 Friday March 4 2005 Hello, Missing you more then ever, Tomorrow will be yet another tough day for us all, 3 Years Have passed on, when it only seems like yesterday. We all Miss you & Love you Dearly, Thinking of you tomorrow as always, Love You x Anon at 17:55:23 Saturday January 1 2005 Anon at 17:07:30 Wednesday December 29 2004 hope you are ok up there babe, thinking of you at this difficult time of year xx Amy xx Jem at 18:15:04 Friday November 12 2004 Heyyyyy tom, Happy Birthday babe, hope you are celebrating in sytle up there. me and em went to batch last night and when the clock struck 12 i said happy birthday to you dont know if you heard me or not. I came to see you today, your garden looks gorgeous. Been thinking of you loads tom miss you more than words can say. I dont really know what to say apart from i love and miss you so much. I still remember that time when it was ems and mine first day at Francis Bacon and i walked down to meet her and you were standing there in your boxers haha :). i'll never forget your cheeky smile or walking into your house and hearing you either doing the hoovering or playing your music as loud as you could. Anyway have a lovely birthday and pop in soon let me know your about. Love you loads tom xxxxxxxxxxx sister emily! at 14:01:03 Friday November 12 2004 To my Dearest Bro Tom! Just writing you a message to wish you a very happy 23rd birthday! Just been to the cemetry & put my flowers down for you they are all lovely & bright just like yourself! Thinking of you everyday & missing you more every hour! Words cannot explain how much you are missed by everyone but im sure you already know that! Missing you being around Love you forever more! xxx Anon at 00:19:00 Friday November 12 2004 HAPPY 23RD BIRTHDAY TOM,MISS YOU SO MUCH THINKING OF YOU ALWAYS GONE BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN XXXXXXXXXXX kerrie at 15:20:53 Thursday November 11 2004 Hey you. Happy Birthday x dont really know what to say babe....i suppose the same as always..i still think of you a lot and can still see your handsome face and cheaky smile. where ever you are tho im sure you are celebrating today in True Tom Style i will be down at the weekend to see you as it will be too dark after work. i really wish i could see you again just once. im going to go as i really dont know what to say babe but i just want oy uto know i always think of you. Happy birthday again Darlin x x Lots of Love x x x Em (Sister) at 20:36:48 Wednesday November 10 2004 He is a friend to remember, a friend we love so much. The memory runs through my mind of the last time we touched. He lived a life of happiness, a life filled with love. And from one little mistake he looks down on us from up above. He was always there to make you laugh when your day was going wrong. Where was he the day where we had to say "so long?" Why did it have to end this way in so much pain? Since he left this world, things have never been the same. I can no longer look forward to tomorrows anymore, because I know that they will never be the way they were before. Not seeing his face, not hearing his voice. I wish there could have been some choice. Life can began and ended so fast. The memory of Tom will always last. I wish there was some way I could have said goodbye. The thought of him runs through my head as I look up in the sky. Knowing he is looking down on us with a smile on his face, remembering the life he lived before he left this place. If his life didn't end so quick he would have gotten far. Only if he had chosen not to get into that car. So as I end this poem I want you to remember this: Live your life to the fullest because it could end real fast. Base your life on the future, but keep memories of the past lil sis at 20:18:27 Wednesday November 10 2004 We think of you in silence And often speak your name But all that's left to answer Is your picture in a frame. If we could have one lifetime wish One dream that would come true We would pray to God with all our hearts For yesterday and you. And heartaches make a lane We would walk our way to Heaven To Be With You Again! Amy at 14:00:22 Wednesday November 10 2004 HAPPY BIRTHDAY FOR TOMORROW BABE. I won't be near a computer tomorrow so I thought I had better put a little something on for you now. I will be coming to see you at some point tomorrow afternoon, we can have a Birthday smoke as we did last year. Its just a shame you can't really be there to enjoy it with me. It can be hard talking to you when you aren't sitting there next to me. Hope you are still smiling up there. And I hope that you have the biggest party tomorrow, just remember we are all there in spirit. Love always Amy (& Mark) xxxx TRADESTEVE at 03:26:44 Thursday October 21 2004 Alright raver! Sorry I havent posted anything recently but I only have to put on one of the Euphoria cds and listen to Bk and Anne Savage and I think of you (yep - shirts off bouncing all over the place to 140 bpm. Cant believe how the months go by but one thing is for sure my memories of you will last forever Tom. Hope you got your own clubnight up there...better have by the time I get up there. Im still there at Trade....part of the furniture I am...fixture and fittings. What makes me laugh is when trade clubbers take a break from clubbing and then return. The first thing they say when they see me is "my God! you're still here". Charming! Ill be there when until the cows come home. We had a bit of bother earlier this year with people taking certain liberties with dr**s. Well they werent on lozenges. Anyway we were suspended from Tunmills Easter until September when we came back for the Tony de Vit birthday tribute (hope you've met him by now up there). We had a massive queue and though we started 5.30 am Sunday morning we didnt finish until 3pm. God! I mean I nearly missed Antiques Roadshow on the telly. Tony's "apprentice" at Trade Fergie played a blinder guest set. He bumps into me outside at 3pm on the Clerkenwell Road outside Turnmills. I go "Ah, Mr. Ferguson". Fergie's reply was "Ah Mr Johnson" and kissed me on the lips nearly falling over me. Well what do you expect after being inside Trade for 8 hours. Well we got the Trade birthday end of October - No 14 - the awkward age. Ill be thinking of you then and also your birthday coming up. Im gonna visit soon. Miss you loads raver.....miss you loads. love Tradesteve Amy at 13:34:35 Tuesday September 21 2004 I can't believe how quickly time seems to be flying by - it will be mine and Marks 1st wedding anniversary in a couple of weeks. Even though so much time has passed we have not and will never forget you babe. I still can't believe that you weren't here to help us celebrate, although i know that you are watching down on us all. Love and miss you always honey xx emily (sister) at 16:45:34 Thursday September 9 2004 Heya Tom, Only me again! Just thought i would pop by and say a lil hello to ya! Hope things are alright with you up there! Missing You Heaps! Had a lovely holiday with rob in cyprus wheather was fab came home with a lovely sun tan to, Was horrible to come home =o(! Havent really got much else to say, I Love you x Emily (Sister) at 12:02:01 Friday July 23 2004 Hi Tom, What can i say? Sorry i havent written to you in such a long time, I just havent been able to find the words to be able to write up on your web site, A day does not pass by where i still think of you, your always on my mind. Its been a while now since you were taken away at such a young age from your friends & family..but it still seems very hard to be able to believe to this day that your no longer here. Things have healed a little the pain isnt as hard to deal with but it still breaks your heart knowing your not here, We all know your in a better place at the end of the day but you had so much to live for. Im going to go now as im lost for words! Love You so Much x Memories of you tom are longlife treasures! Your always in my thoughts! xx Amy at 08:12:49 Monday July 5 2004 My question to all of you is: Would you have made the same choice? At a fund-raising dinner for a school that serves learning disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question. "When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?" The audience was stilled by the query. The father continued. "I believe, that when a child like Shay comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes, in the way other people treat that child." Then he told the following story: Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, "Do you think they'll let me play?" Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging. Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and, getting none, he took matters into his own hands and said, "We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning." In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inni! ng, Shay put on a glove and played in the outfield. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat. At this juncture, let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible 'cause Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball. However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least be able to make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman, Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game. Instead, the pitcher took the ball and turned and threw the ball on a high arc to right field, far beyond the reach of the first baseman. Everyone started yelling, " Shay, run to first! Run to first!" Never in his life had Shay ever made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled; Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to second!" By the time Shay rounded first base, the right fielder had the ball. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions and intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward second base as the runners ahead of him deliriously circled the bases toward home. Shay reached second base, the opposing shortstop ran to him, turned him in the direction of third base, and shouted, "Run to third!" As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams were screaming, "Shay, run home!" Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the "grand slam" and won the game for his team. "That day," said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, "the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world." AND, NOW A LITTLE FOOTNOTE TO THIS STORY: We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail with! out a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people think twice about sharing. The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces. If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people on your address list that aren't the appropriate" ones to receive this type of message. Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference. We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the "natural order of things." So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present with a choice: Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up that opportunity, and leave the world a little bit colder in the process? You now have two choices: 1.. Delete this. 2.. Forward it to the people you care about. Friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have fallen. Anon at 13:51:48 Friday June 4 2004 anon at 23:33:33 Sunday April 4 2004 hi i just came upon this site and started 2 read all the msgs and it has really made me feel upset and realise that we have got to live each day 2 the full and treasure everything we have because it wont last forever Anon at 19:48:31 Monday March 29 2004 Amy at 14:03:35 Thursday March 25 2004 To realize The value of a sister: Ask someone Who doesn't have one. To realize The value of ten years: Ask a newly Divorced couple. To realize The value of four years: Ask a graduate. To realize The value of one year: Ask a student who Has failed a final exam. To realize The value of nine months: Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born. To realize The value of one month: Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby. To realize The value of one week: Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper. To realize The value of one hour: Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet. To realize The value of one minute: Ask a person Who has missed the train, bus or plane. To realize The value of one-second: Ask a person Who has survived an accident. To realize The value of one millisecond: Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics. To realize the value of a friend: Lose one. Time waits For no one. Treasure every moment you have. You will treasure it even more when you can share it with someone special. jem at 16:53:02 Monday March 8 2004 hey tommy its only me, well its now been two years and i still miss you so much! i went to see you on friday i layed some flowers down for you your favorite colour yellow, it looked lovely up there so many flowers, really shows how much people cared and still do for you tom. miss you and love you lots jem xxxx mark dodge at 15:10:13 Sunday March 7 2004 hello mate came up and saw you on Friday, nice to be able to have a smoke on our own again. Seeing all of the flowers made me realise just how many people there are out there still thinking of you and missing you as i am. Will catch up with you soon, next time smoke's on you! EMMA at 18:24:56 Friday March 5 2004 I FORGOT TO SAY THAT CHLOE AND I CAME TO SEE YOU TODAY AND VICKIE, WE BROUGHT YOU SOME FLOWERS THERE WERE LOTS OF BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS THERE BROUGHT BY THE MANY PEOPLE THAT CARE ABOUT YOU. THE OTHER DAY I HAD A DREAM THAT WE WERE ALL AT SCHOOL AND YOU HAD JUST LEFT US AND EVERYONE WAS CRYING LOADS OF PEOPLE WERE STANDING ON THE STAIRS AND I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STAIRS AND WHEN I GOT TO THE BOTTOM YOU WERE THERE AND YOU JUST HUGGED ME AND SAID "DONT WORRY EM I AM FINE". I KNOW THIS MAY SOUND WEIRD BUT I FEEL IT WAS A SIGN THAT YOU WERE LETTING ME KNOW THAT YOU ARE O.K UP THERE! I AM MISSING YOU LOADS AND THINKING OF YOU ALWAYS AND FOREVER EMMA XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX EMMA at 18:15:35 Friday March 5 2004 EMMA at 18:13:21 Friday March 5 2004 Hi honey i cant believe it has been 2 years since you left us, but there hasnt been a day where i havnt thought about you. I have kept your pictures under my pillow and kissed them every night! I have lots of really good memories of you from school and when me and chloe used to come round to yours and davids but i wish a had known you after we left school. There were often times that chloe and i had both said how it would have been really nice to have seen you again but it never happened and that hurts me but i will carry the memories i have of you and in my heart you will be with me forever. I know this may sound funny but they are lucky to have you up there coz the Tom that i remember was an amazing, funny, charming guy who always managed to make me laugh when i was down! so im sure you are one in a million up there! My heart goes out to Angie, Alf, Emily and Emily and all the family and friends that were close Tom and even the people that only knew him briefly coz im sure he touched there lives as he touched mine. ALL MY LOVE MISSING YOU LOADS EMMA XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX chloe at 17:56:17 Friday March 5 2004 just like i promised em and i came to see you,i still dont beleive you're gone,im waiting for someone to say toms back,we r all going out tonite to meet up with him,but the reality hits in and i know that it wont happenx i kept my black and white wax,that ive now had for 7 yrs,because u were the last to use it,and i found your hair in it,nice! i think its going to go off soon!i really wish i had seen you on that sat,the last time i saw you was vicky poulton's 18th,i didn't really talk to you because you were with emily,and i didn't really know what to say,because i could see how happy you both were,but i still liked you and that never went away,but from hearing about you and emily you were really good for one another,which makes me feel better that you left us happy. I WILL THINK OF YOU ALWAYS AND THE PEOPLE THAT WERE CLOSE TO YOUXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX chloe and emma at 17:39:30 Friday March 5 2004 Amy at 08:22:44 Friday March 5 2004 Hi honey, i'm really sorry i couldn't come and see you on my way to work this morning but even after 2 years i'm finding days like this hard. It makes it worse when i have to drive past your spot every morning on the way to work. I can't begin to imagine how your family will be feeling. My heart goes out to them. I have prepared one for after work though. I am going to come and see you with Sarah and we can have a smoke together, for old times sake, Mark will try and make it too as long as he is back from work. Love you honey, and will always miss you. xxxxx auntie Sarah at 10:16:11 Thursday March 4 2004 Hi Tom, Im so sorry it's been ages since I sat here and wrote to you, but you are always in my thoughts. I cant believe it is 2 years tomorrow since you went away. It hasn't got any easier. I just wish and wish you would come back, if we could have one last chance to talk to you and hear your voice. We all love you so so much my lovely. Love Sarah, Conrad, Ollie and Millie xxxxxxxxx Sam Harkess at 10:53:59 Thursday February 12 2004 Hey Tom, just thought i would leave a lil message. Still missing u. My grandad is up there in heaven with u aswell now. Hope you 2 aint sharing rude jokes! I know what your like ha ha. Hope your ok with all them other angels coz that is what you are and always have been. Love u lots, Sam xxx amy at 13:28:19 Friday February 6 2004 What a miserable day today, if only you were here to brighten it up. Miss you always honey xxx Amy xx kerrie at 11:19:34 Wednesday February 4 2004 Hi babe, god tom i've missed you so much lately its been really hard wihout you, Gav and i broke up just before xmas and if you were here i know you would have helped me through it and cheered me up, its been hard dealing with that and you not being around. Please shine down on me tom, im sure you have more important people to visit so when you get a chance please come and visit me and help me get through this. lots of love kerrie x x x x chloe at 23:28:40 Monday January 26 2004 HI TOM JUST TO LET YOU AND YOUR FAMILY KNOW IM STILL THINKING OF YOU,I CANT BELIEVE I HADNT SEEN YOU SINCE WE WERE 15,IT WAS A SHAME WE LOST CONTACT,I CANT BELIEVE HOW MUCH IT AFFECTED ME WHEN WE LOST YOU,I HAVE GOT 3 PHOTOS OF YOU,ONE WITH YOU AND I,ONE WITH YOU AND DAVID,THE OTHER WITH YOU LOOKING A LITTLE DRUNK,ITS REALLY STRANGE HOW THE SATURDAY BEFORE YOU WENT WE WERE PLANNING TO MEET UP WITH YOU AND JAMIE AND THAT,BUT JAMIES CAR BROKE DOWN,SO JAMIE SUGGESTED TO MEET UP THE SATURDAY AFTER,EM AND I COULDNT WAIT,BUT WE NEVER DID GET TO SEE YOU MAYBE THATS WHY IT WAS SO HARD AND FRUSTRATING,I CAME TO SAY GOODBYE TO YOU,I WENT TO THE FUNERAL,AND EVERY YEAR ON THE 5TH MARCH I WILL VISIT YOU,IF ONLY I HAD GOT TO SEE YOU ON THAT SATURDAY YOU COULD HAVE KNOWN THAT EM AND I STILL THOUGHT OF YOU AND DAVID,I HOPE YOUR HAPPY UP THERE,EVERY TIME I THINK OF YOU I REMEMBER THAT FANTASTIC GREAT SMILE,AND THE TIME I CUT DAVIDS HAIR AND YOU AND EM JUST LAUGHING AT ME,THE DAY WE WERE IN YOUR ROOM AND EMILY KEPT WANTING TO COME IN AND SIT WITH US,AS YOUNGER SISTERS ALWAYS DO,I CANT IMAGINE WHAT EMILY GOES THROUGH,I COULDNT IMAGINE HOW MY EMILY WOULD FEEL,CAUSE SHES THE SAME AGE AS YOUR EMILY,I WANT TO SEND MY LOVE UP THERE TO YOU AND TO YOUR MUM,DAD AND SIS EMILY,I THINK ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIMExxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx chloe at 23:07:04 Monday January 26 2004 Amy at 12:17:57 Friday January 2 2004 Hey sweetie, Happy New Year. I hope we didn't make too much noise when we came to visit you on Christmas day. I thought having a drink with you would suit you better than some flowers. Missing you loads and thinking of you always. xxxx Amy Emily (Sister) at 10:03:39 Tuesday December 30 2003 Morning Tom, Just writing you a message to say Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year! Havent wrote sooner as i havent known what to say, Been Speechless! Christmas was a hard day Being the 2nd christmas without you, We all coped well, we came to see you in the morning and lit some candles for you to keep you warm. Im thinking about you always whether crying or smiling. Everyday seems as hard as the day we lost you but you will be forever in our hearts and we will have never ending memories of you & your big cheeky grin. Its empty without you around, a big chunk of our hearts will always be missing now your gone, We all know you have gone to a much better place at rest now although we can only wish you was still down here with us as you used to be living up the normal life!! Im lost for words to say now, Thinking you everyday, Missing You Even more Each Day! Merry Crimbo tom, Be with me at new year, I Love You Sammy H at 15:11:31 Wednesday December 24 2003 Hey Tom, Hope ur aight up there! It christmas eve n the 2nd christmas without u :(. I thought i wud write this message now coz i wont be in a fit state to in a few hours, ha ha. I hope ur there with ur family (in spirit) this christmas. Missin u loads still. My friend Ricky joined u on the 12th November so make sure u look after him 4 me please. Love u loads Sam xxxx Amy at 09:19:44 Friday December 12 2003 If your money was in a bank that credited your account with £86,400 each morning but carried no balance over from day to day … and every evening deleted whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day. What would you do? Draw out ALL YOUR MONEY of course! Each of us has such a bank. Its name is TIME. Every morning, it credits you with 86,400 seconds. Every night it writes off, as lost, whatever amount you have failed to use to good purpose. It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft. Each day it opens a new account for you. Each night it burns the remains of the day. If you fail to use the day's deposits, the loss is yours. There is no going back ... there is no drawing against "tomorrow." You must live in the present on today's deposits. So invest your time in activity that will win you the utmost in health, happiness, and success! The clock is running … so make the most of TODAY! To realize the value of ONE YEAR, ask a student who failed a grade. To realize the value of ONE MONTH, ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby. To realize the value of ONE WEEK, ask the editor of a weekly newspaper. To realize the value of ONE HOUR, ask lovers who are waiting to meet! To realize the value of ONE MINUTE, ask a person who missed the train. To realize the value of ONE SECOND, ask a person who just avoided an accident. To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND, ask the person who won a silver medal in the Olympics. Treasure every moment that you have! And remember that time waits for no one. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it's called the present ! Azanti at 18:16:36 Thursday December 4 2003 In the troubled times we live in Tom, with so much hate and anger in the world it is good to know the impact that one person can have on those around them and how the love for that person is shared by so many. Your friends and family all love you greatly and we need more people like that with such strenght of heart. Stay strong Emma. Az. x Emily (Sister at 13:00:24 Wednesday December 3 2003 Dear Tom, I am just leaving a message for you as i havent written in a while, There is not a day goes by without my mind being on you, Each day hasnt seemed to get any easier but i know it will take one day at a time, I know everyone is moving on gradually as time passes by, but i never want anyone to forget you! I was just looking at a picture an it still does not seem real that youve been taking away..not for a day but forever, Knowing that im never going to see you or hear you again is the most hardest & scariest feeling in the world. I dont know what goes on up there but i just hope you are watching me. I would love to write on this site to you everyday, but it comes to a point where you look and you read but you just cant think what to say anymore, My heart still aches to this day, but i know you know im thinking of you every day, I best get back to work now but i will write to you again soon I Love You x Anon at 23:38:09 Monday November 24 2003 we will get there, we will get there somehow, cross that river, nothings stopping us now, we will get through the night and make through to the other side.get there, well the night is cold and dark but somewhere the sun shines in and we feel it shine on us, we'll keep trying. we will get there, we will get there somehow nothing stopping us, we will get through the night and make it through to the other side. xx- we'll all see you soon tom xx Miss u!! at 13:11:22 Wednesday November 19 2003 A loved one is a treasure of the heart, and to lose a loved one is like losing a piece of yourself. But the love that Tommy brought you did not leave, for the essence of his soul lingers. It cannot escape your heart, for it has been there forever. Cling to memories and let them find their way to heal you. The love and laughter, the joy in the togetherness you shared, will make you strong. You'll come to realize that your time together, no matter how long, was meant to be, and that you were blessed to have such a precious gift in your life. Keep your heart beating with loving memories, and trust in your faith to guide you through. Know that, though life moves on, the beauty of love stays behind to surround and embrace you. Tommy has left you that.... To hold in your heart forever. Remember that he is still here in spirit and holds ur love in his heart! Your very dearly missed Tom and I will never forget you or the happiness you brought into my life! x Amy at 13:26:11 Tuesday November 18 2003 A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package: "This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package." He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box. “She got this the first time we went to New York, 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on. Was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing’s he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said: "Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion". I still think those words changed my life. Now I read more and clean less. I sit on the porch without worrying about anything. I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day. I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if i feel like it. I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to. The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come. I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters... letters that i wanted to write "One of these days". I would regret and feel sad, because I didn't say to my brothers and sons, not times enough at least, how much I love them. Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our lives. And, on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day. Each day, each hour, each minute, is special. auntie Sarah at 21:36:50 Wednesday November 12 2003 Happy Birthday Tom, we miss you so much, it doesn't get any easier and I just wish all the time that we could have you back, I would love to hear your voice and see you smile, to turn around and hear you say "alright Sarah" like you used to. You were such a lovely person, love you loads Tom, love Sarah xxxxxxx Nomsa.k at 20:23:33 Wednesday November 12 2003 Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to Tommy, happy to you!! I was singing that in the college studio! Hey tom, gwan happy 22nd!! i know ur celebrating hard tonight boy. Be good tonight! ah ah! your in a better place with no pain or hardships and still have many years to come. Keep having a great time tonight!! Take care p.s Happy belated birthday to you emily (18th) Sammy H at 11:22:05 Wednesday November 12 2003 Hey Tom. Happy Birthday mate. Still missing u n cant believe ur not here to celebrate ur 22nd birthday but no doubt u'll be doin it up there in heaven! I met a few of ur mates on Saturday night in London for Em's Birthday! They r wicked! Ronnie can dannnnnnnccce! It really did feel awkward as we were there n ur mates were there n u wasnt! It was an emotional night but i think/hope everyone enjoyed themselves! I kno a few people were a BIT drunk. I'm gonna come n visit u today so i will see u soon. Happy Birthday again. Miss u n Love u loads. Sam xxxx R.I.P. Sister (Em) at 10:16:40 Wednesday November 12 2003 We send you all our love now your birthday is here Say that we love and miss you every day all year We remember birthday's past in a very special way We celebrate the times Tom before you went away Sadly Missed Forever More... Amy at 08:39:50 Wednesday November 12 2003 HAPPY BIRTHDAY babe, hope you are having it hard up there, we both love and miss you and wish that you could be here so that we could celebrate as we used to. I miss the old days at Peach. xxxxx see you soon xx Amy & Mark xx lil sister at 00:20:20 Wednesday November 12 2003 Happy 22nd Birthday Tom, Thinking of you today as i do everyday..As you know it was my 18th on saturday & it was great, also it became one of the hardest days of my life without you there it broke my heart..I wish you was there it was amazing...and my birthday cake had the 2 most beautiful angels on...Myself & you, I knew you was with us all that night but you not being there tore me apart, i know you would have been proud of me tom & i hope you are! I wish you was here everyday..especially today on your birthday, I know deep down you will be having a fab time up there..but the question is..why not down here?! I love you so much & i dont think a day has got any easier for me yet, Anyway i wont get into anything to drastic or ill only get myself in a mess again and we dont want that its your birthday today...Happy Birthday tom, Thinking of you, I Love you x kerrie at 16:57:53 Tuesday November 11 2003 Hello Babes long time on speak. i havent been here to say hello for ages but i have still thought about you every day. Happy Birthday for tomorrow i thought i would write now while i have a chance to. God its still hard Tom here we're all are growing up and celebrating another birthday each yeah all apart from you and its horrible. i always though i would know you forever and our children would go to all the same schools just like me and you. i bet you would have been celebrating hard in true tom style this weekend. Keep looking after everyone babe and if you get a chance please please come and visit me. My nan Joined you up there last year if you havent seen her already please give her a kiss and a hug from me. Lots of Love Kerrie x x x x Amy at 13:24:13 Tuesday November 11 2003 Happy Birthday honey, missing you more everyday. Although i know you were looking down on us, I really wish you could have been here for mine and Marks wedding. Our love to you always Amy & Mark xxx moosie at 14:05:29 Tuesday October 14 2003 hey tom. hope ur ok up there! its my day of college, so im chilling out! my birthday in 8 days (22nd oct). having a big meal in zizzis on 24th!! i passed my driving test 2day. its da best thing thats put a smile on my face dis month. my great aunt has now joined you in heaven!! look out 4 her! better be of, i have enough work to do! you take care! From Nomsax kylie at 23:05:35 Monday October 6 2003 Hey tommy, i didn't really know you but i knew your sister. i can see how much this has affected your whole family and how hurt they are that someone so young and loved was taken from them. i don't think anyone can realise how much it hurts to loose someone so close to them unless they have been through it themselves. i remember the day when everyone found out that you had passed away there were tears everywhere. i have tried to be there as much as i can for emily she is a darlin' an so brave i know you are so proud of her. i have been to see you a couple of times with sam to. your stone does look beautiful. i can see how much emily misses you but we all know you are still around in your own special way looking over her and the rest of your family. takecare R.I.P x Heaven at 13:57:13 Sunday October 5 2003 LETTER FROM HEAVEN To my dearest family & Friends, some things I'd like to say. But first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay. I'm writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above. Here, there's no more tears of sadness; Here is just eternal love. Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight. Remember that I am with you every morning, noon and night. That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through. God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you. It's good to have you back again, you were missed while you were gone. As for your dearest family, They'll be here later on. There's so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man." God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do. And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you. And when you lie in bed at night the day's chores put to flight. God and I are closest to you....in the middle of the night. When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years. Because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears. But do not be afraid to cry: it does relieve the pain. Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain. I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned. If I were to tell you, you wouldn't understand. But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o'er. I'm closer to you now, than I ever was before. There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb; But together we can do it by taking one day at a time. It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too; That as you give unto the world, the world will give to you. If you can help somebody who's in sorrow and pain; Then you can say to God at night......"My day was not in vain." And now I am contented....that my life was worthwhile. Knowing as I passed along the way I made somebody smile. So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low; Just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go. When you're walking down the street and you've got Me on your mind; I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind. And when it's time for you to go....from that body to be free. Remember you're not going.....you're coming here to Me. Noms at 09:48:57 Friday October 3 2003 yes yes tom! still thinking of ya. soz its been so long me not flyin by to write ya. i havent forgotten darl. started back at college couple of weeks ago still doin performing arts, its going well and im happy. im gonna join an agent!! got my induction for my new job on sunday, i start p/time in cannons health bar. need da money!!u take care. all my love nomsa.x jem at 20:43:33 Saturday September 27 2003 hey tommy sorry i havent wrote to you in a while doesnt mean i'm not thinking of you, i know you know that! i miss you tom big time i miss you cheeky smile and everytime i was at yours, you'd either have ur music on loud or tidying up! well i've left sopwell now start my new job on monday quite nervouse but i know you'll be there to guide me! i came down to see u last week, still lookin peaceful! anyway best be off, love u loads tom xxxxxxxx litlle cousains claire and amy at 19:55:44 Saturday September 27 2003 hiya big cousain tom we both miss u so much and for always ive had to go back to school well i went to secondry school and amy went back to school.Never a day goes by with out thinking about you we both love u so much 4 always your love lil cousains claire and amy XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX uncle terry&untie cheryl at 19:50:44 Saturday September 27 2003 hello Tom were thimking of you all the time. sorry we havent wrote for so long,we will always remember the brillant times we had with you when you were younger.were always miss you tom we love you loads with all our hearts love from uncle terry and untie cheryl xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Litle Sister at 17:08:07 Wednesday September 24 2003 Hiya Big Bruv, How are ya? Hope your doing alright up there! Was flying with you yesterday evening in the clouds...You Looked beautifull as you always did! Missing you as much as the day you left us and it will be that way until the day we meet again. Had a lovely holiday away for 2 weeks nice break, Not one day goes by when i dont think of you, no matter how much fun im having..i think of you more because i know how much you loved your fun!!To this day i still cannot believe you have been taken from us, I know your still here, but not in the way you should be. I will write to you again soon as im at work and dont want to get myself all upset, Love you HEAPZ X Anon at 17:55:57 Wednesday August 27 2003 Emily-Sister at 18:15:04 Saturday August 16 2003 Missing You So Much.I Love You. Sammy H at 23:04:56 Sunday July 6 2003 Hey Tommy. Hope ur alright up there mate! Came to see u the other day, ur stone in the cemetary is beautiful! Me n Emz went on a bit of a mad one this weekend! We went out on Friday AND Saturday. It was wicked though n emz enjoyed herself which is the main thing! I've been thinkin bout u alot recently n i still cant understand how someone so young n so special can be taken from us all! I will always treasure the memories of when we lived at Burnside n at Secondary school! You were so funny n u always had a smile on ur face! I saw a pic on emily's wall of when u n her were little n it nearly made me cry coz i just thought to myself of when we were younger n now your no longer here but me, emily, garry, david, alex n james are! It just doesnt seem right! Anyway,i best go now b4 i make myself cry! Missin u like mad Tom! Take Care of urself up there n keep watchin over us! Love u loads Sam xx lil cousain claire at 17:42:28 Monday June 23 2003 Hiya tom sorry i have not spoke to you for ages but now i have got the cance to.Most people says it gets easier but it doesnt it gets even harder.I miss you even more now then ever.love you with the whole of my heart claire XXXXXX Lil Sister at 09:04:59 Sunday June 15 2003 Morning Mr Fox! Writing you a message as you know theres a big event going on for you today so i know you will keep the wheather as it is for us...Its so hot! Well As you know lil liviola is cycling her bum cheeks off right now from..London..to...Brighton!!!! For An amazing cause as well which is to raise money for the london air ambulance that came for you, tried there hardest but still we lost you, but i know your still here with us every step of the way...This money could help the london air ambulance to try and save many more people like you! I Hope you watch everything today, Its going to be a lovely day! I will be non stop thinking of you today as everyday..Im sure dad also knows that you want to mention 'happy fathers day' and im sure you are saying it right now and he will probably know that deep down!! Tom We miss you so much, Everyday is a struggle for us but we manage to pull through every one of them, Talk to you again soon, Love you with all my heart Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx liv at 09:04:06 Wednesday May 21 2003 Hi everyone – I am doing the London to bright this coming June and have decided to raise money for the air-crew that lifted Tom (The London Air Ambulance). I am dispatching a really bright colourful leaflet to everyone I know to build up this campaign as much as I can to generate more money for this life saving charity. Unfortunately I don’t have all of your addresses to send u one, but I have pasted it on here for you to view - obviously you won’t be able to see the images etc, but you can read the txt!!! The following text is what I have on the letter This coming June I will be taking part in the London to Brighton cycle ride and have decided to raise money for a very important cause, The London Air Ambulance. The London Air Ambulance provides vital transportation for victims who have suffered horrific injuries and need immediate medical assistance. This crew was brought to my attention last March when one of my close friends, Tom Fox died in a tragic car accident… The crew attended immediately and fought against time for his life. Unfortunately the speedy attendance from the team wasn’t enough to save Tom’s life, but it has and will save others. The London Air Ambulance is funded purely by donations only. Therefore I am hoping that, with your help, we can raise a great fund for them and dedicate it to the loving memory of a beautiful person who will never be forgotten, Mr Tom Fox… So come on, don’t be a squeaky bums, put your hand in your pockets and donate to a life saving charity…Please make all cheques payable to Virgin HEMS London Ltd and send them to me to forward at 125 East Street, Epsom, Surrey, KT171EJ. You can check out what they do on www.hems-london.org.uk If you would like more info - you can email me on livia@insightrecruit.co.uk... Thanx again, and I will let you know how I get on..... Livia xxxxxxxxx Hi everyone – I am doing the London to bright this coming June and have decided to raise money for the air-crew that lifted Tom (The London Air Ambulance). I am dispatching a really bright colourful leaflet to everyone I know to build up this campaign as much as I can to generate more money for this life saving charity. Unfortunately I don’t have all of your addresses to send u one, but I have pasted it on here for you to view - obviously you won’t be able to see the images etc, but you can read the txt!!! The following text is what I have on the letter This coming June I will be taking part in the London to Brighton cycle ride and have decided to raise money for a very important cause, The London Air Ambulance. The London Air Ambulance provides vital transportation for victims who have suffered horrific injuries and need immediate medical assistance. This crew was brought to my attention last March when one of my close friends, Tom Fox died in a tragic car accident… The crew attended immediately and fought against time for his life. Unfortunately the speedy attendance from the team wasn’t enough to save Tom’s life, but it has and will save others. The London Air Ambulance is funded purely by donations only. Therefore I am hoping that, with your help, we can raise a great fund for them and dedicate it to the loving memory of a beautiful person who will never be forgotten, Mr Tom Fox… So come on, don’t be a squeaky bums, put your hand in your pockets and donate to a life saving charity…Please make all cheques payable to Virgin HEMS London Ltd and send them to me to forward at 125 East Street, Epsom, Surrey, KT171EJ. You can check out what they do on www.hems-london.org.uk Big fat thanks, Livia xxxxxxxxx Hi everyone – I am doing the London to bright this coming June and have decided to raise money for the air-crew that lifted Tom (The London Air Ambulance). I am dispatching a really bright colourful leaflet to everyone I know to build up this campaign as much as I can to generate more money for this life saving charity. Unfortunately I don’t have all of your addresses to send u one, but I have pasted it on here for you to view - obviously you won’t be able to see the images etc, but you can read the txt!!! The following text is what I have on the letter This coming June I will be taking part in the London to Brighton cycle ride and have decided to raise money for a very important cause, The London Air Ambulance. The London Air Ambulance provides vital transportation for victims who have suffered horrific injuries and need immediate medical assistance. This crew was brought to my attention last March when one of my close friends, Tom Fox died in a tragic car accident… The crew attended immediately and fought against time for his life. Unfortunately the speedy attendance from the team wasn’t enough to save Tom’s life, but it has and will save others. The London Air Ambulance is funded purely by donations only. Therefore I am hoping that, with your help, we can raise a great fund for them and dedicate it to the loving memory of a beautiful person who will never be forgotten, Mr Tom Fox… So come on, don’t be a squeaky bums, put your hand in your pockets and donate to a life saving charity…Please make all cheques payable to Virgin HEMS London Ltd and send them to me to forward at 125 East Street, Epsom, Surrey, KT171EJ. You can check out what they do on www.hems-london.org.uk Big fat thanks, Livia xxxxxxxxx x Lil Sis x at 01:31:32 Sunday May 11 2003 Hey Tom, Sitting here wondering why your no longer here, as i do everyday, Came down to see you today, have been alot recently, today when i left you it looked stunning, shining stone, beautifull cream, yellow, and orange roses, My heart ached today when i came to see you, tears were wanting to come out as i held them back, eyes filling with water as i looked at the sky and remembered you so clear if only you were still here. I have memories and pictures of you everywhere, but none of them compare to the real you tom your huge smile, your laugh and those stunning eyes, You touched a heart of each soul out there and you will never be forgotten, I Miss You So Much! I look at photos of you everyday and staring right at your face is the most hardest thing to do because sometimes you get carried away and you sit there looking at it thinking its you and wanting to start chatting to you but then you come to realise its the photo its not you not really its a picture that are dearly loved oh tom without you around my life seems to be empty, I know you will look after me, just one day i hope you will come and see me again, I will never forget you in a million years! All My Love And Hugs, Your Sis x Lil Sis! x at 23:40:54 Sunday April 20 2003 Dear Tom, Missing You More Each Day, Happy Easter, Your forever in my thoughts and heart, I Love You. Goodnight! x Sammy H at 11:39:26 Friday April 18 2003 Hey Tommy, How u doin up there mate? I see u bought the sunshine out 4 us!! Me and Emzie went out last Wednesday for our mate Gemma's birthday, it was a wicked night! We had a limo that took us 2 London 4 a meal. We drunk Champagne all night and both me n Emzie were a little bit drunk! We were walking through Leceister Square singing!! Cant remember wot we sung but i was told the next day!! Ur living room looks really nice, went 2 see emzie on Sunday n saw ur mum n dad aswell! Oh yeah, cant forget George!! I was looking at your picture the other day Tom and it is still really hard 2 believe that ur gone! I was talking 2 my cousin the other day and i was trying to explain to her that she is lucky because she has never had 2 feel the hurt n pain people go through when u lose someone special! Ur the first person close to me i have lost n i never realised how bad the pain really was til 5th of March 2002. Me and my brother was in pieces yesterday talking bout all the stupid things we used 2 do when we were little n the stupid arguments we used to fall out over!! I miss them days when we were younger n we didnt have to worry bout anything coz our parents were there 2 do it instead!! ha ha. Anywayz Tommy I am gonna love u n leave u coz i got work 2 do mate! I am thinking of u always. Love u loads Sam xx p.s. Miss u liv at 13:47:40 Thursday April 3 2003 oi oi savaloy... hey you lil monkey, sorry i haven't been on here for a lil bit, but as you know i did come down to see you 2 weeks back. it was the first time I saw your stone down, and it made me cry seeing your beautiful name inscribed in that rock. just made it more real you know! even thou i still can't believe that you are actually gone. I still think of you on holiday, and in a way you are, but it's just so sad that we can't be with you to laugh at your jokes and watch you do all your crazy nutty stuff you used to do. As Trade steve said, your place did look the most colourful and bright, but then you always stood out from everyone else down here too!! I loved the lil fairy em layed for you. see thats em being near you all the time and keeping her eye on you ay! I am moving on with my life Tom, and so far things to being looking on the up, but i just feel so bad for Em man. i just try to imagine how i would feel if my fella was taken like you was from her, and it just makes me feel sick! she is young and a beautiful person, so she has plenty of time to rebuild her life, but it now that she needs you! keep her warm ay tom. she misses u so much and i can'r do nada about it. I wish you were still her! can't wait for the day that we all meet up again, so we can do all our stuff we used to do together! not for a while thou ay!!! :O) oki dokily my lil friend, i best get back to the old grind stone, but whatever your doing have fun and remember we all love and miss you to absolute bits!!! big hug, all my love, liv your palxxxxxxxxx Lil Sis at 12:47:20 Friday March 28 2003 Heya Tom, Been missing you alot lately and even more so as each day comes, I was thinking lat night how things are so weird without you around its been a year now since you were taken away time flies but its not the way it should be, you should still be here with us leading the life that you was a year ago, You still mean the world to me and not a day will go by where i dont think of you. I find it hard to cry as i have cried so much, last night i thought about you and tears just streamed out but i wasnt expecting it, I still see your face in my mind and hear your voice i will never forget the way you look or the way you sounded you will forever be in my heart. Take Care Of Yourself Up There, I Love You Emily (his girl) at 16:02:33 Monday March 24 2003 Hello there angel face!!..Long time no hear I know, but Im always thinking of ya and your beautiful face!!...The weather has been so lovely the past few days, its hard 2 believe that we r atil in March..The sunshine always makes me think of u and are time together..We first got together in June so it was sunny and hot all the time, u and your Dad n Paddy were doing your drive way and I remember sitting out there on the digger while u would be working away with your top of in the sunshine..Those were the best days Tom and I will never forget them...There r so many beautiful memories that I have of you, out raving having large as Steve says, or coming 2 get me on your bike from the station, or waking up with u and u would start singing and joking straight away,going up Camden or London...So many and I cherish everyone of them so close 2 my heart...So many cool things have happened lately aswell, not big things but good memorys but I feel that they will always have the thougth "I wish Tom was here 2 see or do it"...I have really bee fancying a great big Tom kiss n cuddle lately, well I always do but even more so now..I remeber the way u used 2 smell when the weather was like this, when u used 2 come in from outside or I did, we used 2 smell each other cause we loved tat smell, it was like a fresh summery skin smell, sometimes I can smell it on myself and it always makes me smile and I can close my eyes and imagine that its your skin Im smelling!!...I love u so much Tom and even though u r not here with me u r still my sunshine and u still make smile...We r all going out this wkend, I hope u will drop in on us for a lil boogie!!...Take care up there baby face!...Big big big kisses and cuddles,lots n lots n lots of love always your angel Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx TRADESTEVE at 22:09:13 Sunday March 23 2003 Tom,its tradesteve here.Still missing you deeply. I promised you I would visit you again and did so Saturday afternoon. You certainly laid on the warm sunshine compared to last year when the weather was freezing and the rain heavy. But the sunny day reminded me of you so much. You were like a beam of sunlight brightening up people's lives. Although emotional I had this vision of you on the decks playing the latest BK remix on full volume and as I'm saying "great track Tom", with your customary cheeky grin you're saying, "most definitely Steve, most definitely!" I noticed where you lie was the most colourful. I phoned your home and spoke to your mum and sister and told them I'd been to see you and said how beautiful everything looked and that it was me who added the white carnations. I'm bringing Lee Brett with me on my next visit...you remember he does the guest list at FRANTIC. I've been going to Frantic again a bit more now that Trade is moreorless monthly. Bumped into Joel recently. I'm taking Rod this week to Turnmills to see Lisa Lashes - its euphoria that night.Met Lisa in Ibiza last August at a Tidy Boys night.She joined me having my photo taken. I took off my t shirt and she got her boobs out - quite a photo! Managed to get her to play at Trade's 12th birthday last October. Keep your eye on all of us down here will you. You had a huge effect on all our lives. I only have to think of you with your t-shirt off, bouncing around to 180 bpm tracks and I have this incredible grin on my face. It works best when I'm feeling a bit down or if I've had a bad day. YOU AMAZING GUY!!!! I promise to return very soon ok. Take care Raver - Stephen xxx amy at 11:27:34 Sunday March 16 2003 Anon at 15:38:42 Friday March 14 2003 Carly Car at 16:39:10 Monday March 10 2003 Hey Tom. Mucking about on the college computers so I thought I'd say hello. Hope you are okay up there my darling. Today has been so boring. English Lang and Lit is a barrel of laughs!not. I wish you were still here mate. Just been looking at the photos of you when you were younger. It really breaks my heart but I have to be strong because life rolls on. I just hope you continue to look after us all- I love you lots. Sorry to go so soon, but I have the worst headache in the world- I will write again on Thursday- Laters sweetie- Carly xxxxx Anon at 16:14:47 Monday March 10 2003 Anon at 16:14:46 Monday March 10 2003 Anon at 16:14:44 Monday March 10 2003 theresa beach at 16:31:05 Sunday March 9 2003 Hi tom, i'm sorry its taken me so long to write to u but i know ur doing well up there. there's not a day that goes past that i don't think bout u and the good times we had at skool!! we had such a laugh and i'll neva 4 get that. love you always R.I.P Theresa xxxx. Carly at 13:21:11 Friday March 7 2003 Hello dear Tom. I have been trying to use the internet for three days now and everytime I haven't been able to get onto this site. I am here now, and fingers crossed I will be able to tell you how much I love you. I can't believe it has been a year now- I miss you so much and whenever I hear house music my heart aches. I think of you all the time, everyday. I know in my heart that you are looking down on me and saying don't cry-but it is so hard to keep the tears back when I remember you as the other half of our German rock band. We used to spend all day in our gardens, those days are the happiest of my life. I meant to tell you- Ollie got his car stuck in the mud when it was snowing. Emz was outside and I went and had a rant about him as we were arguing. Your mum and dad got back and i was laughing my head off with your dad. I love your dad- he has your funny personality- it could have been you standing there. Emily is doing well, just got herself a great little job at my sister's workplace- she is a little stunner and I know it is so hard for her but she always plods on. I admire her courage- I would've fallen to pieces by now. Not really much to tell you about me. I have been finding out uni info and getting all my work done. I get my AS level grade for the law exam I done in Jan next week. I am so scared- If its bad i don't suppose you can cause an error on their computer to say I got an A? When I find out I will either be depressed or get incredibly drunk- probably both! As for the weekend-I am going to Sandown horseracing tomorrow. I'm gona have a little flutter on the gee gees and see if this poor student can get any money! Anyway sweetheart- I have to get going to my lesson now. I love you and miss you and can't wait to see you again. I will write to you soon- Love you very much- Carkeys xxxxxxxxxxxxx Anon at 13:05:05 Friday March 7 2003 auntie Sarah at 20:26:17 Thursday March 6 2003 To dear Tom, I don't know what to say, I miss you so much and it seems harder now than ever. I dont believe people when they say time heals because I miss you more than ever and I just wish I could bring you back for your mum, dad and Emily, everyone misses you so much. Why you Tom, you were the best! I miss your voice, your smile, your jokes, I love you always Tom, auntie Sarah xxxxxxx emma wain at 16:55:06 Thursday March 6 2003 hiya tom, well i can't believe it's a year already, sorry i didn't write yesterday but it didn't mean i wasn't thinking of u. Even now people i talk can't believe ur gone! thinking of u alwayz!! also thinking of u em and alwayz well!! loads of love & hugs emma xxx Lil Sister at 11:39:45 Thursday March 6 2003 Well what can i say!? A year already, i miss you more and more as each day passes, I love you with all my heart, You will never be forgotten you are one in a million. As every day passes by a new tear is born, Our lives will never be the same without you here tom. Its been a year already, i sit here and look at your picture still thinking your here today i hear your voice, i see your smile....but only in memories why not face to face? I cannot believe i am all alone now on my own without you, at home the feeling is so strange and i know this pain will never leave my heart, until the day we meet again. A tear is shed everyday a thought is thought everyday I Miss you Tom, Love you with all my heart, May You Rest In Peace, Love Emily xxxxxxxxx Sammy H at 11:36:36 Thursday March 6 2003 Hey Tom, I came down to see u yesterday! Had a little cry, I couldnt help it! I was watching the clock and as soon as 3:10pm came it was the exact time i found out that u had passed! I cant believe it has been a whole year! Not a day has passed i havent thought about u and i am missing u like crazy! I hope u like the white roses i left! I didnt want to leave the cemetary yesterday because i kno u was there and when i left it felt like i had left u behind and i just wished u could be standing there next to me but i kno u was watching from above! Sabrina sang u a little song! She's crazy. I promised myself i wouldnt cry but when i got there i just couldnt help it. Sorry. I kno u dont like people crying. I will come see u soon. Missin u loads. Love u. Love Sam Harkness xxx R.I.P Simone Ametrano at 10:54:15 Thursday March 6 2003 Tommy Darling, Its me Simone! I can't believe its been a year now, its so strange not being able to see or ring you anymore, I loved our little chats we had, you always managed to pull a smile on my face, guarenteed!! I never know what to write really cos I hate talking to you like you're not here, cos you so obviously are still here in all our thoughts!! Well i'm coming to see you today so I guess i'll chat to you in a bit - take care baby x x jem at 09:36:05 Thursday March 6 2003 hey tommy, sorry i didnt write on here yesterday i went down to see u tho! i cant believe its a been a year already! it still feels like only yesterday that it happened! my heart went out to you and your family tom yesterday as it does everyday! anyway i dont really know what to say and tears are fallin down as i write this so i better go! miss you so much tommy! love always jem xxxxx Nomsa.K at 14:56:46 Wednesday March 5 2003 Wa Gwanin Tom. I honestly cant get over how quick a year has gone by. Its hard to believe mate your not in ppl lifes, but i know people havent stopped thinking bout you mate. much love goes out 2 Angie, Alf and emz. thinking of you all 2day. Peace. God bless.xxx Kerrie at 10:06:52 Wednesday March 5 2003 A Whole Year!! i cant believe it the time has gone horribly fast Tom. i still think of you as much as i did then. I think everyone is feeling pretty bad today espicially your family. Dont really know what to say hun i hope you are okay and i hope you know that everyone still loves you. i am glad you were part of my life while you were. There is so much more i want to say but cant put words together to say it Speak soon babes all my love Kerrie x x x x livia at 09:54:10 Wednesday March 5 2003 Dear Alf, Ang, and the two Emily's.... I can't believe it has been a year already. I know today is going to be so hard for you and it will bring back all those awful memories of this time last year. I feel weird and sad today, so I can't imagine what you guys are going through today! I know everyday is an up-hill sruggle to get through this, but I just want you all to know that I am thinking about you all.. I am gutted I can't be there with you all today in person, but my heart will be with you all day I promise!! I will be coming down on saturday to pay my respects to Tom so hopefuly you will be in for me to pop in and have a cup of tea with you all. I find this so hard to try and comfort you with words as I know that words will not help you in this time, but hopfuly try and make it that tiny bit easier for you all... Ok, i best get on now, but I hope today will pass quickly and not to involve too much pain! All my love, thoughts and cuddles with you all.... Livxxxxxxx lesley (Gavins Mum) at 06:48:51 Wednesday March 5 2003 Hard to beleivea year has gone by without you Tom..... You are still in my thoughts and the world seems an emptier place withuot you in it. They say that time heals, I hope that this is true. Angie,Alf,Emily and Emily, I am thinkong of you all today ...be strong .... Lesleyxxxx Ronsta at 22:36:00 Tuesday March 4 2003 How you doing Tommy Boy. It's the Ronsta here. It's the first time I've logged on this year. Don't think it's because I've forgotten you. Couldn't do that, could I now. It's just that I don't always know what to say (some might find that hard to believe). I think of you all the time mate. Last Saturday, Joel and I met up with the guys from St Albans and went to 'each goes hard on a Saturday' at Camden. Brierney, Ollie, Greg, Dan and Scott came. We all had a wicked time and it's a shame you wasn't there geez. We were all thinking of you though. Tomorrow it's going to be one year since you left us mate and a few of the London boys and girls will be coming to see you. This past year has been so tough for so many of us and it's going to continue to be tough, certainly for a while longer mate. There are always so many things that happen every now and then that remind me of you. Some make me laugh, but also some make me cry. The bottom line though is that you are never too far from my thoughts. I miss you so much Tommy Boy, it sometimes hurts, but one thing is for sure, I shall keep on smiling, especially when I remember your smiling face. I'm going to sign off now, but I shall be making contact again soon. Love you my friend xxxxxxx Emily(his girl) at 13:2:18 Monday February 24 2003 Hello my lovely angle fcae!!..I am missing you so much lately!!...I just want you here with me so so much!!...Jus want things 2 be how they used 2 be!!..We were so happy, I was so happy, but now I dunno!!..Im having a bad week angel face, I keep thinking that this time last year me n poor your had no idea that this would be are last week together. I can count myself lucky in the sense I have no regrets in sre last bit of time together, I knew how much you loved me and you knew how much I loved you. Are last few months together was proberly one of the best we ever had, and I am so glad of that. At least I can say you found a true love in your life time and that you was loved truely and I am so so lucky 2 beable 2 say that you had it with me. I am so proud of you Tom and the time I had with you!1..I love u so much!!..Ok Im going 2 go for now, just popped in 2 say hi and I love ya!!..Take care angel, miss you so much and love u always!!..Your angel forever,Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx jem at 13:09:31 Wednesday February 12 2003 hey tom, hope your ok up there!! i came to see u today as you know! can u do me a favour? my aunty joined you today can u just say hello to her for me!! i know i'll see u again one day but i dont wanna wait that long! i miss you loads and i cant believe its nearly a year it still only seems like yesterday that it happened!! anyway i better be going, miss u always tommy love jem xxxxxx Emily ( his grl) at 16:28:55 Wednesday February 5 2003 Hello my angel face!!..How r u lovely bum?....Sorry its been a while, but I think of u everyday!...Its eleven months 2day since Ive seen u,heard u,felt u or even known u was just a phone call away!..This time next month it will be whole year!!..I cant even believe it, when u was here I could never imagine being apart from you this long!..I still miss u now as much as I did when u was 1st taken away!..I man the pain had eased ver the year, but now it seems 2 be getin harder in some ways, I think its cause now I am finally waking up so's 2 speak. For so long I lived in like cotton wool, just living like in a bubble or something!!..But now everyone is moveing on and not worrying bout me anymore, well still worrying but not as much as b4 you know, and now its like Im on my own now, having 2 do my own thing, and u know its hard!..I Know people think I am doing ok, and I am really, but inside there is always something misiing, even when I tried 2 start seeing a guy well not seeing him I just kissed him it still felt so wrong!!..The only reason I did that was cause 4 sum reason I thought t was about time, but I was wrong, still I dont even know when I will be ready 4 all that!!..No rush though ay?!..I just wish so much that u was here Tom, things would be so so different if u was, so much better!!..Im doing ok though baby, I hope that Im doing u proud, Ive got a few things lined up that I know u will love!..Anyway my lubadly angel, Im going 2 have 2 love u and leave u for now!..I havnt had a dream about you for a while so pormise u will come and see me soon!...Sending lots n lots of biiiig cuddles n massive kisses up your way!..Love u with all my heart always!!...Your angel Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Simone at 10:52:28 Wednesday January 29 2003 hello Bubs, hope you're all cool and taking good care of yourself!? Still miss you like crazy, no other fella I know mounts to you, you were one in a million bubs!! When I think about you I just think how unfair it all is, why? why you? you were such a lovely, lively happy young lad who had his whole life ahead of him - I can't believe its almost a year now - I miss you loads Tom, you're always in my thoughts - take good care - Simone x x Lil Jo Jo at 16:58:08 Tuesday January 28 2003 HEY TOM, HOPE UR OK UP THERE AND THE BIG MAN IN THE SKY IS TAKIN CARE OF U!...IT'S BEEN A COUPLE OF WEEKS SINCE I LAST MAILED YA!..BEEN HECTICLY LOOKIN FOR A NEW JOB...GETTIN THERE I FINK!.. ME BIRTHDAY 2MOZ GONNA BE THE RIPE OLD AGE OF 26.. WENT OUT TO CELEBRATE AT THE WEEKEND, WENT TO SMILE @ THE VIADUCT WAS COOL!! HAD LOTS OF FUN ALTHOUGH I KEPT FINKIN' IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO NICE FOR U AND EMS TO BE THERE JUST LIKE THE OLD DAYS!!.. STILL FINDIN HARD TO BELIEVE YOU'RE GONE.. MISSIN YA LIKE CRAZY MAN!.. WELL U LIVE IT UP FOR ME 2MOZ JUST LIKE U WOULD HAVE DONE!! LOVE YA ALWAYS LOVELY..WILL MAIL AGAIN SOON... LIL JO JO XxXxXxXx Sammy H at 21:28:56 Friday January 24 2003 Hey Tommy. How u doin mate? I have been missing u LOADS!! Sorry I haven't wrote on here 4 a while been quite busy working 4 my pops and i got exams at college (nightmare)!! Happy new year! Not that is a very happy one coz ur not down here with us!! Don't worry in anout another 70 years or so i will see u again! I hope ur looking after Jessie!! Love u lots Sam xxxxxxx jem at 19:26:13 Friday January 24 2003 hey tommy its jem, hope ur ok up there just a little note to say still thinkin of u mate!! its my birthday tomorrow gonna be 17 :) well i better go! miss u more and more every day! love u loads jem xxxxxxx livia at 11:07:41 Tuesday January 21 2003 last message was from me.. Livxxxxx Anon at 11:07:02 Tuesday January 21 2003 Hey tom, Soz i haven't been on ere for ages sweety. just been so busy wiv everyfffinnngg!!! kinow thats no excuse but as u know i still fink bout u and what fings would be like if u were still ere! Was doing a spin class last night and that song by queen came on... "Bohemian Rhapsody" I was just finking what would you have been like if u had known that you were going to be taken away from all of us just like freddie murcury did.... i still cant believe it... it does seem to be getting further away from reality though.. it just takes me having a climps of ur foto on the side or a film coming on that reminds me of you, or a programme on tv where some1 dies that makes me think of what has actaully happened to you!! I know as time goes on it will get easier.. well for most of us anyway, but it stillis so unfair.... miss having you round for dinner, or txting during the week, or having a stupid fone call but most of all havingh a larf and doing crazy shit round rons and that!!!! u will always be the most creative, funniest guy ever and that is how i remeber u so vividly!!! anyway.... anwyay!! my life seems to be getting beta!!! my job is going wickely! i got consultant of the month!! and i've only been ere 3 months!!! my love life is getting... and other stuff needs a bit of work on!!! so all in all i seemed to be getting there agin!! not totally there yet, but def see a point now where as a few months back i couldn't see nothing!!!! ok thats me... gonna start thinking bout what to eat for lunch now, but it has to be light as I am TRYING to diet :O) AGAIN (typical girl)!!!!! :OP and i'm going out for a drinking and eating sesh tonight so i have to balance it out... wish i cud say cant wait to see ya, but just have to say we will meet again..... one day!!!!!.. take care up there you lil gem u!!! keep an eye on peeps down ere that need you!! love you so much tom!!! take care mate.... ur pal, Livxxxxxxx sabrina at 20:49:27 Tuesday January 14 2003 hiya tommy i am so sorry that i have not been on the web for time but i am back now happy new year babes all of us are still wishing that you was here to see it in with us but i hope you had a good one up there missing you more and more every day i am going to pop ronud and see how your little sis,mum and dad are doing on sat if they are in but i am sure that they are fine with you watching down on them 24/7 i miss you loads tom take care of yourself up there babes love you always sabrina xxxxx p.s i will be back on again soon Nomsa.K at 20:18:14 Tuesday January 14 2003 hiya tom m8. just thought i'd fly bye and say hi. sorry its been so long. wishing u a happy new year!! take care sweetie. always Nom's.XXXXXX sabrina at 20:17:51 Tuesday January 14 2003 jem at 18:46:34 Monday January 13 2003 hi tommy, been thinkin of you alot these past few days!! sorry i havent been down to see u in a while, i'll come down soon and see you!! well just wanna say happy new year!! missin u still tommy love u loads and always jem xxxxx LIL JO JO at 16:54:33 Wednesday January 8 2003 Hey Tom baby, Sorry i ain't been in touch, not very good wiv this e-mailing lark!! Anyway it's just to say Happy New Year me loveliness, missin' ya loads and i promise i'll be in touch soon! lovin' ya always matey.. Lil Jo Jo xxxx Emily(his girl) at 11:08:06 Monday January 6 2003 Hello there my lil angel!!..Sorry I havnt emailed you over crimbo and all that, but I havnt reall had access 2 a computer, dont mean I aint been thinking about you though honey!!..Its was so strainge over Christmas, I mean I had a good one thanks 2 all those around me, they wouldnt leave me alone for five mins, which was a good thing as it was when I was alone I would start 2 think about you, and what I would have been doing if you was here. I think New Years was harder for me as last year me you and Rich went out and had 2 wicked time, but yet again everyone was there Tom haveing a gr8 time, like you would of been proud of, I did get a lil down, but then I saw Squeker and he was haveing a gr8 time and he has had as much of a bad year as me, so I bucked my ideas up and made a good night of it!!..And then we all went 2 Rons 2 carry on an dthen on 2 your fave plae Camden!!...It was good in there u would of loved it, my legs were like wood so I couldnt dance but I had a rocking time anyway!..U should of seen Campbell, he was sooo funny!!..So now we r in2 a new year, a proper new satrt without you here with me!!...And Im going 2 do my best 2 make it a good one!!...I know soon that I am going 2 start moving on, well I have 2 I kno u would want me 2 angel face, but I knwo in my heart I will always love u Tom!!...U r an always will be, my soul m8, my true love, my best friend!!..I mean its 10 months since I lost you Tom and you can still mae me smile when I think of you, you are amazing!!..I watched Pearl Harbour last night, and when I saw the bit when Ben Aflleck comes back nd his girl thought he was dead, that would be a dream come true for me, but I know its not going 2 happen babe, and I have realised that!..I bet u r thinking abot time as well!!..I wil always love u Tom, and just cause certain things happenas my life moves on, dont mean that has 2 stop hey?!....Ok my loevly lil angel, IM going 2 go now, got 2 get back 2 work!!...Hope your doing ok up there, well I know u r!!...Missu ltsn lots as always, but love u 100 times more!!..Love u babe, your angel always..Emily..xxxxxxx Anon at 19:46:55 Sunday January 5 2003 happy new yr mate!!xx Lil Sis at 11:38:57 Sunday January 5 2003 Hello Tom, Missing you as always, Loving you more each day. Happy New Year! Love You Rodrigo at 18:05:13 Monday December 30 2002 Easy Tommyboy. I'd like to wish you a happy new year mate, and also to your family who miss you like mad! Lots of love, Rod. Sister at 16:41:08 Sunday December 29 2002 I Miss You Sammy H at 16:52:33 Thursday December 26 2002 Hey tommy. Merry christmas 4 yesterday. It's such a shame that u couldn't be here with all ur family and friends. I spoke to Emily and she wasn't looking forward to waking up in the morning and u not bein there! She's so brave. You would be so proud of her and ur parents. They have handled it really well but everyone knows it still hurts!! I can't stop thinking bout u still, i miss u. Remember seeing u driving down the road in that little nova a couple of days b4 u passed and then the next tome i saw it was in the newspaper!!! I love u tommy and miss u loads. I will never stop thinking bout u! I'll come see u soon. Lots of love Sam xxxxxxxxxx ~x emily (Sis) x~ at 00:11:34 Wednesday December 25 2002 Hey Tom, Well what a hard day this ones going to be, tougher then it already has become. Merry christmas, Miss you more then ever right now, dreading to find myself awake without you in the morning here with us, I love you with all my heart, I honestly dont know what to say apart from this is going to be a tough one not only for me but people close to you, just be with me everywhere i go. I Love You jem at 15:38:46 Sunday December 22 2002 hiya tommy, how are you? hope ut alright up there!! still missin u lots tom!! just wanted to chat with you so i thought i'd write! i was speakin with em this mornin bout you, she loves u so much tom and is so brave and all of ur family! i cant believe its nearly a year!! it only seems like yesterday and it still dont seem real i keep thinkin i'm goin to walk in ur house and see u again! i know u can hear me talkin to you most nights! well tom i better go but i miss you loads and loads! love u lots jem xxxxxxxx Emily (his girl) at 13:55:50 Thursday December 12 2002 Hello my lil angel face!!..How r u?...Sorry its beensuch a long time since Ive written to you, but I do come and see you here and in my head everyday!...Well as you know we all went out 4 Campbells birthday last weekend, and it was a good night, celebrated it true Campbell style!..Hope u was celebrating it with us up there babe, well I know u was angel!..I havnt really been up 2much else, just gearing myself up for xmas!..In a way I am looking forward to it, I mean u know how much of a kid I am when it comes to xmas's and birthdays and that, but it is hard without u here!!..I have seen so many things I wanna get u for xams, and sometimes I come close to getting them, and that part is very frustrating...I keep remembering r first crimbo together, u were well nervous, but u soon settle in hey babe. My family loved u. I miss u Tom, so much, I miss having a boyfriend, companion, soul mate, lover everything!!..I know that eventually one day I will move on, but dont ever think that u have left my heart, your name will always be carved in it, and my soul as well. THere will always be a part of my heart and soul that belongs to you Tom Fox. my angel!!...Hope my lil fairy is looking after u, I should be coming 2 see you Sat babe, try and make it a lil warm for me, bets its freezing down there now!...Listen IM going 2 go now baby, Im waffling on a bit here!!..I love u so so much, and will miss u always!!...Your angel Emily xxx Sammy H at 22:04:34 Tuesday December 10 2002 Tommy u may have been taken from all of us but u will NEVER be forgotten! All my love Sam xxxxxxxx ~x Lil Sister x~ at 13:17:15 Tuesday December 10 2002 Well What Can i Say?! Another Tuesday,Still seems as hard as every other single day that has passed and the days that are on there way sometimes the days dont seem to get any easier tom it feels as though they get harder for me and as though i dont want to live my life without you in my life! I was Just reading back on the messages and you were truly loved not only by me or mum or dad but by everyone that knew you! I havent written in a while but i visit the site everyday i havent been able to write ive wanted to but nothing would come out it was just 'blank' i just didnt know what to say because its just so hard wihtout you around,Its so hard being in this house knowing you came home around 4 from work and bring ya newspaper in and start making me and mum laugh in your funny voices, then hoover your room or go and have your usual mix, no music, no big smile, we have nothing anymore tom apart from memories and photos to treasure with smiles and tears that are shed everyday. I wish we could reverse that morning we woke up and make the day go alright so you came home, This year has been the hardest of my life and now here comes christmas which is going to be the most difficult. One thing keeps ticking over in my mind and thats when i walked down to see you when you were at rest laying in your coffin and i just walked in and it was the biggest shock to me because i stood by the side of you and expected you to wake up and hold me and just hug me and tell me everything was going to be alright, i never wanted to leave you i just wanted to hold your hand and stay there with you, i remember your hands and holding them and just wanting to shake you to wake you up but all i could do was stand there and cry and hold you for the last time that i had with you. At First i didnt belive it and i didnt believe it was you laying there but in the back of my mind i knew you had gone to a better place and would be alright up there but it was so hard.Anyway I hope Your alright up there and looking after everyone as i know you would, One day i hope we will get to meet again. I Love You craig at 22:57:37 Wednesday December 4 2002 hey tom i know that you havent met me but it sounds like you were a great guy and you are missed by alot of people. there is alot of people who love you and miss you. especially your lil sis. well i sopose this is the hardest thing that i have had too write, but you do sound like a top bloke i jus wish we could have met, well by for now and keep an eye on everyone from up there because everyone missed you. craig liv at 09:00:15 Monday November 25 2002 Morning Tom, Blimey what a w/e I had!!!!! I was lil misss action woman I can tell ya.. Friday did a combat class with emma,which totally knackered me, saturday morning, I got up nice early, was aching all over from the class the night b4, but anyway, I went horse riding across the blackheath forest..mate was it beautiful!!!!! had a canter and a lil gallop...forgot how much u have to use your leg muscles though... then sat night went out for a lil boogie wiv emma... got sooo drunk I couldn't even talk...oopppppsss. :O) then sunday went swimming with emma again..then chilled wiv jacuzzi, sauna and finished it all off with a yummy meal in the restarant at the club there!!!! all in all a wicked w/e... I am in aginy now though....can just about walk.. bet u were having a lil larf this morning at me...couldn't even walk up the hill without it busting up me legs :O(..funnnnneeeeee though... u only have to laugh ay!!! Well as u know tom I had some more bad news on sun... One of the family friesn, sarah fonticoba died too mate... she used to be me sis's best mate many moons ago, she's been to Italy wiv my family loads of times.. after her dad dies bout 5 yrs back, she suffered from anirexia (sox cant spell it) and she battled that out for 4 yrs in hospital and got thru it.. and then out of the blue the other day. she callapsed of a brain hemi ridge.... can't believe it tom man!!! nto having a gr8 yr for losing special people are we... as she's new up there with you guys, look after her ay! it just opened my eyes even more... one minute ur here, the next your gone!!! obviuosly u were needed more up there, but wot bout us down ere!!!! we miss u... it sux that people get taken away... if we had known that the w/e we saw u was gonna be the last with u... i can't say we would of done much more... u knew we all lved u! and even wen u was wiv us we always spoke so highly of u!! and u know that too!!! I am just so grateful we got to spend that w/e wiv u and that u came round mine on the fri with em b4 it happened!!! anyway.. I am gonna stop rambling on! but take care sweety!! and say hi to sarah too for me please!!!.. speak soon, your mate, Livxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx :O) auntie midge at 11:43:35 Saturday November 23 2002 Hi Tom, it's been a while eh. So much to say but just not the right words to say it. Yeah right i can hear you saying me gobby stuck for words that must be a first!!. As i am sure you know we all miss you soooo much. We had your do and as expected was a great success. The only place on a sunday afternoon to be giving it some!! As usual your mates, the lads, big Em and little Em, mum and dad all came up trumps for you. I think you would have been proud. Any injuties on the pitch were quickly remedied with a nice J. so all was well and all were happy. I'm sure you were there having a gigle to yourself anyway. It was then your 21st, a weird day, a mixture of happiess and sadness. You are still here with us, we just cant see you. I hope you liked me singing happy b,day to you in true pub singer styley. It really got me thinking about you and the others. Amy and what she is doing, the things you all got up to as kids and the giggles we had with you all. These are all very precious memories that can not be taken away. I hope you can hear me jabbering away to you in my head,getting on your nerves no doubt. Well my darling Tomms my heart has been shattered into a thousand pieces but i know i will see you again, i carry your soul and your spirit with me every day and i know i will put my arms around you again one day. Never forget i love you, be good and remember bring the house down babe!! Love ya midgey xxxxx Lil sister! x at 18:14:55 Friday November 22 2002 Hiya Tom! Hope You are ok, Im fine down here missing you more and more as easy new day comes, But hopefully one day i will end up really strong for you and everyone else ay!! Hope You had a good 21st Birthday, we missed you very much on such a hard day for us and everyone else around us but as i know all your close friends such as ronnie and that lot had a wicked one for you as they know that thats what you would have wanted and also im sure you was with them all they way! My birthday was really hard without you but i seemed to cope, i promised myself i wouldnt cry but i woke up and was all by myself no one was home and you most of all you wasnt there and i just wished for you to come and see me again one day!! But Emily,Liv and everyone else made it such a wicked night for me and it was really good to spend it with everyone because they all remind me so much of you ya know...personalitys...dress sense....funny voices etc etc its all so hard but i still dont know whether its hit me yet or not that you have gone and i will never ever see you again, Apart from when the day comes when we do meet again. Hope your still taking care of yourself and everyone down here! I know you are because your to greater person to not be looking after us a! The worst is over now...Just christmas to come which im dreading without you as i know its going to be so hard as emily said all those lil memories, But as i always say its good to look back on the memories we have but its tragic that we cant have anymore to look back on! Anyway im going to go now and i will come and see you as soon as i can!! Love you Forever, Your sister always! Love Emily XxXxXxXx R.I.P xXxXxXxX Emily(his girl) at 23:34:58 Tuesday November 19 2002 I just wanted 2 say sorry, I keep forgetting to put my name down, its not that I dont wat 2 be known I promise!!!..Love u!!xxx Anon at 23:33:29 Tuesday November 19 2002 Hello my darling angel!!...Its me your lady!!...Im really missing u 2nite Tom, I had a dream bout u last night, that u came back and I couldnt get 2 u, the when I did I only had u 4 a small while then u had 2 go back!!..Its was so lovely and nice 2 see you again, but so horrible 2 loose you again!!...I love u so much Tom, and Im dreading xmas!!..Its wierd cause the memories of then seem so fresh like it was a fwe months ago, I can still remember we spent r 1st xmas day apart both with r own familys, but we missed each other soo much we called each other about 35 times!!..We had arranged 4 me 2 come down and see u boxing day, but cause I had family round I couldnt come 2 see you staright away!!..U kept texting me and calling me saying u wanted me there and when was I comeing and I kept telling u how much I couldnt wait 2 see ou and your face when u saw your pressies!!..Then when I did finally get there u and lil Em came and got me from Borhemwood in your lil car, and I had a biiig bag of pressie 4 u, and Em was like look at that Tommy, and u said I dont care about the pressies Im just gald 2 have my angel here with me!! :o) I remember it so clearly, its one of my clearest memories. I remember how wicked and specail I felt when u said that, and I still do when I remember it!...I just get a lil upset that I wont hear it again this year from you!!..Im so confused this year I want everyone around me at xmas 2 make it as specail as it can be without u, but its impossible!!..I miss u so much Tom ,I knwo u know how miuch, and I hope that u hear me when I talk 2 u at night!....Sweet dreams my beautiful darling angel face!!...Big big big kisses and big big warm hugs forever!...I love u!..Your angel always!!..Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx jem at 14:52:03 Tuesday November 19 2002 hey tommy its only me again! came to see u today it looks lovely down there! i was strong for your mum but when i got home i couldnt stop cryin! it still dont seem real and i cant believe ur gone! i miss you tom! anyway better go, but keep shinnin down on everyone! love u lots jem xxxxxxx Liv at 14:17:24 Monday November 18 2002 Hey batman, Tom sorry I haven't written on ere for so o o o o o long. I have been thinking bout you loads though mate.. i really have.. I talk about you all the time.. as you know, and still wen I talk about u.. I sometimes can't help but cry... I keep seeing u in your coffin, and I jjust still can't believe why u were taken from us!! we all went out for your 21st the other day and it was such an emotional proud night for me and the gang!! we all had a toast for you... bet you were looking down lapping it up ay :O) WE MISS U SOOOOO bloody much Tom!!! can't stress how much sweetheart! i just wish u was still ere, for your family, em, ron me everyone that misses you and loves you!!! I will def try and write to you more on here tom, just that I have been so busy and i have had a lot of change in my life in te last couple of months, but now I am settled in a good job with e-mail again I will write to you to say hi every now and then!!!! Ok, best crack on now but theres no need to say that you are greatly missed tom!! i lit a candle for you the other day on all souls day next to your photo... am always thinking bout u mate!!! All my love and hugs, Your pal, Livxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Anon at 17:51:48 Friday November 15 2002 Hello baby!!..Hows u up there!!..Still recovering from having a ball of a party I bet!!...I missed u so much on Tuesday Tom, there was so much I wanted 2 do 4 u, and its so frustrating that I couldnt do it. I made the best of i though angel face!!..Me and most of the gang met up for a meal and toasted u in the manner you deserve with a nice botlle of bubbly, I know u was theer with us. But I know u will be here with us more 2nite, cause we will be celebrating your birthday in true Tom Fox style!!...We will all be having it for you 2nite babe, in your memory!!..Its going 2 be hard without you there, but I ownt get sad cause I know for sure that u wouldnt be, u would be pround that the crew have got together 2 celebrate a life of someone who was so so special 2 them and always will be!!..Life will never be the same with out u around honey, but IM going 2 do the best I can 2 keep your memory alive the way I know u would want!!...I love you so much Tom, u r my world. U r the thing that still keeps me going and you are ot even here, that shows how great a person you was. I know I wont see you on the dance floor babe, but I know u will be there with me with all of us!!...Missing u so so much Tom, Love u always!!..Yours forever...Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx :o) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Simone Ametrano at 14:36:23 Thursday November 14 2002 Hello Gorgeous, still mising you loads!! I couldn't stop thinking about you on your birthday, it triggered so many happy memories of when we used to knock around together up the rec and at my house - thoughts of you filled my head all day!! I know if you were still here you would of had a blinding birthday, out raving somewhere no doubt!? You probably still had a blinder wherever you are, you were always the life and soul of any party!! You're still in everyones thoughts Tom, people always have stories to tell about you....and yeah, they're always funny ones!! I don't think anyone could ever say a bad word about you, you were one in a million, a proper lovely bloke who had everything going for him - you will always be in my hear making me smile whenever I think about the things we've done - Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave a footrpint in your heart - and you certainly did that Tommy - Take care Tom - Loving you, Missing you - Simone x x Mum & Dad at 21:43:39 Tuesday November 12 2002 To Our Dear Son Tom, Wishing you a happy 21st birthday On your special day today, Came to see you this morning with sarah we got soaked with the rain, we let a balloon go for you hope it reaches you soon sent with lots and lots of love. Hope You Like all of your beautiful flowers from your family and friends. We miss you so much, Loved Always & Forever, Mum & Dad xXxXx Sam Harkness at 20:37:00 Tuesday November 12 2002 Happy 21st Birthday Tommy. Came down to see you today and left some flowers, hope you like them. It broke my heart not being able to say it to your face!! I tried not to cry but I had to when I got home. Sorry. I like the way you have taken up loads of room! Greedy! I will come and see you again soon. Missin u and love u loads. Sam xxxxxxxx Lesley and Gavin at 17:37:29 Tuesday November 12 2002 Tom weve just been up to see you and left flowers.... Gavin had to climb over the gate .... i couldnt mange it ....lots of flowers and love from loads of people... we know you can see them.... love from us both xxxxxxx jem at 11:07:03 Tuesday November 12 2002 hi tommy, just wanted to say happy birthday, its such a shame that i cant say it to ur face! i think about u every day, comin down to see u soon! miss you so much, love u loads jemma xxxxxxxx Lil Sister at 10:38:05 Tuesday November 12 2002 Morning Tom, Happy 21st Birthday I wish you was here to celebrate it with Us and all Of your friends but i know you are celebrating it with everyone up there no doubt about it, The More i think about you and the more i miss you as each day comes More tears seem to fall. Life is hard without you around, Your big smile, Your silly voices, Your lil car that you absolutely loved and took care of, You just being yourself tom. Today the day outside is the miserablist day so far just on your 21st Birthday, But in some way i believe when rain falls it means your happy which im hoping you are happy up there and watching over us your our angel forever Tom. I think about you every day and sometimes it brings a grin as i look at memories we had behind us but most of all it brings tears as to why we cant have anymore memories to look at when we are alot older growing up with each other etc, Tom Im sorry we lost you at such a young age, But the day will come where its my time and day where i can see you again and we all meet up.I love you. Sometimes when i try to hold back tears my heart aches, it feels as though your there telling me to be strong as you are still everywhere i go or watching over me. HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TOM Love you & Miss You Forever More. Love Emily xXxXxXx Lesley (Gavins Mum) at 07:01:14 Tuesday November 12 2002 Tom.. Thinking about you today on your 21st birthday... we all miss you so much ..... I have been thinking about you a lot because all you boys are having your 21st birhtdays and I was remembering Gavind 18th when we all went to that Chinese and you all drank cocktails and stood on chairs and made silly speeches..... how things change... There will alway be aplace in my heart for you Tom..... love Lesley Lesley (gavins mum) at 06:57:52 Tuesday November 12 2002 Sarah at 00:01:42 Tuesday November 12 2002 To my treasured nephew, on your 21st birthday They say there is a reason They say that time will heal But neither time nor reason Will change the way we feel For no one knows the heartache That lies behind our smiles No one knows how many times We have broken down and cried I want to tell you something So there won't be any doubt You are so wonderful to think of But so hard to do without All my love forever, thinking of you on your special day Love Auntie Sarah xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Carly at 15:45:00 Monday November 11 2002 Hello Sweetcakes.I just wanted to say Happy Birthday a day early just in case i dont get a chance to get on the net tomorrow. Still miss you so much and wish you were here so i could wish you happy bday to your face. Went to your little do yesterday, it was nice to see Em, your mum and dad,etc. Your mum is looking a lot happier and she was strutting her stuff on the dancefloor at one point! Its good to see your mum and dad looking a little happier. It must be terrible for them and Emz, but I know you will help them through the hard times. Emily looked wicked yesterday, lovely looking lady-must run in your family! It was good to celebrate your life yesterday, although i was imagining you walking through the doors at one point. I hope you are alright up there mate, Ollie's grandad joined you on Friday, so look after him as well as us. Arrghh-i wish you were here-love you to bits mate. Your team won yesterday-it was great seeing all your mates there. Everyone is so willing to make an effort because when you were here you made an effort for us. So here's to the 12th-i will be thinking of you like i do everyday-take care mate-loving you always...your mate, Carly xxxx cousain Claire at 15:55:38 Sunday November 10 2002 Hi Tomyou are having a party today everyone is going to be there to celebrate i just miss you more then anything love you lots claire cousain Claire at 15:54:30 Sunday November 10 2002 Hi Tomyou are having a party today everyone is going to be there to celebrate i just miss you more then anything love you lots claire sister at 01:20:12 Friday November 8 2002 Hey tom, Hope Your ok up there my lovely! Well Im sorry about those stupid news papers what a shock that came to me even after Monday which was such a hard day for me and everyone else that was around me. I cried all the way through even though i tried not to, It just really tore me apart and i burst into tears. Well Happy Birthday To me a darl!! 17 Today yay! Wish you was right here to share it with me and most of all to wake up to you being you all funny and happy with your massive smile etc I would love you to try and let me know your with me all the way i know you will be! Anyway im going to go now. Love you Forever, Your sister emily! x mwah x Anon at 20:07:19 Tuesday November 5 2002 hi ya mate. beeen a shitty year thanks to you. haven't laughed half as much and cried twice as much. you know i think of you every day and i know your here somewhere. never knew anyone quite like you and never will but i'm proud i can say we were best metes once. love you n miss u. xxxxxxx davey. david nichiolls at 19:46:59 Tuesday November 5 2002 sarah at 07:42:31 Tuesday November 5 2002 Hi Tom, I just wanted to say I love you so much, and miss you more and more each day, it gets harder, I think this time of year is really hard. Love you always, why you??????love Sarah xxxxxxxxx Emily(his girl) at 00:33:38 Monday November 4 2002 Just wanted 2 say good night my lovely angel!!...I love you so so much! Please keep me strong 2moro, I know u will be with me!..Miss u so much angel face..Love u again, take care up there, come and see me soon!! Heres sum good nite kisses.... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, just a few!!..He he!!...Love ya babe!..Yours always..Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxx jem at 17:27:52 Sunday November 3 2002 hi tommy, how u doin up there? hope u ok! i'm alright i spose, finding it really hard now! i wish so much u were still with us all! sorry i havent been to see u for some time but like i said its getting harder! i'll come and see u soon! i'm quittin college i hate it there! but i need to find a job before i can quit! i'll let u know how it goes! well tommy i have to go coz tears are running down my face as i am writin this! keep lookin down on everyone and look after ur family! miss u, love u lots jem xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Emski (Your lil sis) at 12:20:36 Tuesday October 29 2002 Hi Tom, I know i havent written in a while since my last long message that i had written to you which got me in a right state but i look at this site everyday no matter what i look at it god knows how many times a day as well but sometimes i just look at everything on it and get to the part where i need to write and i just cant, It hurts to much, Well 10 days until my birthday today, What a day thats going to be a! Well i hope it will be cool and im going to try and keep a brave face all day, but i know for a fact waking up that morning without you hear thats going to be the worst part. Im sorry i have to go as im starting to cry again Love you so much xx Carly at 12:01:03 Tuesday October 29 2002 oh,and i hope emily has a great birthday. She is growing up so fast..18 nxt year! Make sure she has a good day tommy boy...Loves ya. Carly at 11:55:05 Tuesday October 29 2002 Hello mate. Just thought i'd say hello and come and speak to you.I miss you loads mate and this time of year is usually so great as its Emz b'day and then yours.Its hard to believe you are gone mate. I know it was your mums b'day. It must have been so hard for her with you not being there. Your b'day soon..hope you enjoy it mate,it's gonna be hard without you. Miss you loads mate, miss our little chats about life, miss seeing you out in the street, miss having you here with us all. At night, i lay there thinking of past memories and what a laugh we had when we were younger when you me and emz used to chill together. I cant wait to see you again mate.get really frustrated at times-just wanna see you again and chat to you. Hope your having a laugh up there, i bet you miss us as much as we miss you. We will all meet again and i cant wait! Well, i'd better go i suppose, im still trying to do a poem for you but i'll get it done as soon as poss.. i dont wanna rush it as i want it to be really special. Ah mate, I know i keep repeating myself but i love ya to bits and miss you with all my heart. Ill come say hello asap, say hello to my family members up there..look after my lovely grandad and tell him everyday i still think of him and that i will never stop thinking of him. Why do the people you love so much have to go and all the barstards stay around? It really makes me angry how unfair it all seems,anyway im going to stop ranting and raving and say goodbye for now. Love you so much mate....Carly xxxxx Anon at 15:57:07 Wednesday October 23 2002 i know there is a rainbow for me to follow to get beyond my sorrow thunder procedes the sunlight so i'll be alright if i can find that rainbows end there's a light in me that shines brightly they can try but they cant take that away from me that light tommy is you, and no-one can take it away from me xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Emily (his gilr) at 11:48:26 Wednesday October 23 2002 Morning my darling angel face. So how you doing up there babe? Still smiling I bet?! Well as you know it was your Mums birthday yesterday, and it was a hard day, I tried to keep her smiling when I was there Tom as I know you would of wanted that the most! I got her some beautiful flower with her fave lillies in them which made her smile, Emz spoiled her rotten, she got loads of cards as well which was nice 2 , but I think the thing that made her laugh most of all was Emz attempt at cooking her a birthday cake, you would have laughed your head off, I could just imagine u saying something like "Dad can use that as a brick 2moro at work!!" Bless her at least she tried ay?! I was actually brave enough 2 try a lil bit and it wasnt that bad at all Emz I promise :o) So baby another one of are many hurdles to climb over this year since loseing you down here! Next we have the inquest, then Emz birthday but dont you worry babe, Im goin 2 make sure she has a wi wi wicked time, just like u would have!!..Shes coming 2 mine and Livs house warming 4 her birthday, and Ron,Cambpell,Richard, Squeker everyones going 2 be there 2 look after her and make sure she has a great night!! And I know u will be there as well angel we wont beable 2 see you thats all, it will be like you are always in another room ay angel!!..Then its your birthday which again I am going 2 celebrate with the crew in a fashion I know you would of wanted ;o) Im not going 2 lie its going 2 suck big time without you there, but we will make it a good one in your memeory babe. We got the footie on the Sunday, wonder which team u will be supporting then, think I know in my own head who! And then of course its Christams, and I dont know how Im going 2 do that one, but one step at a time ay sweet cheeks! I cant beleive how much harder this is all getin Tom,Im missing u so so so much I know I carry on like normal, but I feel so empty inside sometimes.Im going 2 keep strong 4 your memory 4 your Mum and Emz sake but mostly 4 mine! I walked 2 the Station from your house 2day, I havnt done that walk since you were here, infact the last time I done was with you, I rememebr when we used 2 walk home from the station up that steep hill and I used 2 grab onto the back of your jeans so you could pull me up, and I remenbered when I used 2 come down and see you at the weekend I would phone when I got 2 St Albans and you would start 2 ride down and we would meet half way, I would be sooo excited about seeing you that I used 2 run my half 2 get 2 see you sooner, you would be on your bike and take my weekend bag of me and then we would walk, well you would ride home 2gether down the alley. I would give anything 2 wake up one Friday with my weekend bag packed excited as I was goin 2 see you at the end of the day!!..I know I will see you again though angel and we wont ever have 2 worry bout getting the train 2 see each other, or meet half way down the alley, cause then we will be together always.And just like we used 2 say here on earth we really will be each others angels!! :o) Ok sexy bum, Im goin go now as I am at work and keep getting interupted! Stay with us Tom through these hurdles and try 2 keep us strong and smiling. Keep having the wickedest time up there though, maybe thats whats keepin the last of the sun shining down here! I love you so so much and you will always be in my heart, take care of you and all of us, your angel forever Emily xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Kerrie at 17:50:31 Sunday October 20 2002 Hey you!! its been a while ay! that dont mean i never think about you babe, driving past where you lay every day two and from work is really hard, some times i cant even look. We are all turning 21 now and its so sad to think that you (the physical you) wont be! im sorry x x its been a weired year Tom ive missed you so much, i still cant delete your number from my phone. My bestest friend in the whole world the one i have known all my life, who i always talked to when i was down!! i keep remembering the time you came back from Germany and was telling us the stories about what you got up to, no one believed you, As we got older i did start to believe thoses stories cos you were so out going and amazing. What about the time when we all used to go to Colney in the eveningd to just chill and mess around and uit was Xmas and i had just got a pair of new trainers and didnt want to get them dirty walking home so you gave me a backie on ya bike and you were laighing at me cos i was sticking my feet to the side!! So much so that you couldnt ride!! i wish you were here now having this conversation with me, where ever i am i'll raise a drink to ya on your birthday darlin i know youll be enjoying it where ever you are. Best go now sweet heart. All my love Ems and Angie x x x x Night x x x x Mum & Em (sis) at 12:11:44 Saturday October 19 2002 Heylo Tom! Hope You are ok up there!! Our Birthdays soon a! We are getting ready for your Football Testamonial, London Rd Club Against Tom Fox! Everyone is Welcome To come and Watch And enjoy A drink with us to celebrate your 21st Birthday!! Once We Know all The final details, The time..where the game will be etc It will be put on here, Or Ill send more information to you all, as im sure Tom (You) Would like as many people there as possible and have a great day..Knowing you will be with us on that very day with us all!! We miss you very much but you are always with us in our hearts forever to stay, As carly said, It will be a Great day when we all come to meet again. p.s (Thanx for the lovely messages car) See u soon darl! x Anyway tom i hope you are still always looking down on us all, Its my birthday soon 17 finally! Nothing special but still a birthday..A birthday without you, My first one and i know its going to be so hard but i will try my best not to cry and I know you will be with me on my birthday!! And You will be with us on yours a sweetheart! Anyway It seems too hard to write on here for me today..Cold tears running down my face it seems as though Its not going to be such an easy day, Sometimes when i cry my tears are warm and i smile and laugh about the memories but some they are cold and i cry because i dont have you here to have anymore memories with me ya know! Its such a weird and empty feeling without you here Its just a big emtpy space and a hole in our heart that will last forever until it gets filled when we meet you again. I think about you everyday without fail, Your always on my mind No matter what, I dont like to cry because i know you really dont want that But sometimes you have to bare with us when we cry because its really hard without you around your big smile, Music, Just you being you and not here anymore..I Know you can see us and are always looking down on us right now but the horrible feeling is i want to see you and just hug you, Even if its just for 1 second id do anything for A hug From my big bro! Anyway Im going to go now i dont want to cry even though its too late but hopefully one day you will come and see me, even if im asleep just touch my hand And ill know your there please! I love you Always. Love Emily! x Carly at 12:56:57 Thursday October 17 2002 Hi Tom. Just been reading all these lovely messages and am trying so hard not to cry. Im in college in a packed computer room so im trying to keep myself together. I hope you are okay up there. Sorry for not writing sooner but you know i think of you everyday like all these people do. Whenever I hear house music I smile and think of you spinning those decks. I bet your the next Pete Tong up there! I am going to write you some poems soon and write them out to you. A lot of the time words don't really truly represent how we all feel. I wish i could see you again. I haven't seen Ems for a while but hopefully she'll come and see my little student house soon. She's always welcome. Can't believe how brave she is..i admire her for trying her hardest to be strong in life. She's looking great and im so happy about her exam results. I hope toms gal Emily is okay. He used to tell me how much he loved her..and he always will. Well Tommy, I suppose i'd better go but keep looking after all your family..and us lot! Love you Loads...Carly Carly at 12:26:33 Thursday October 17 2002 Hiya Honey. I feel really out of order for not writing to you sooner.I always told myself the first time i'd get on the internet i'd come and send you a message so here i am. Well,what can I say.. I miss you so much. I can't believe you are gone. I know in the last 2-3 years we didn't see much of eachother but you and Em grew up with me that day you moved in nextdoor. I'll always remember our games we'd play. Perhaps the funniest was when you and Em got back from Berlin and we were at the bottom of my garden pretending to be a german rock band. I can still see you sitting there bashing the bucket (or drums as we liked to call it) while i'd be singing the only thing i knew in German..Eins Zwei Drei!When i go to the bottom of my garden i can still see you there. I can also remember staying round your house and you'd join me and Em in the morning and we used to watch cartoons. I'm sure Em can remember that. I miss not seeing you anymore. You were taken away too young but I hope your being looked after. Your proberly sittin on a cloud playing cards with my grandad!Keep DJ'in for the angels darl. One last thing...thank you for giving me the priviledge of knowing you..I can't wait for the day we meet at those pearly gates. Keep looking over us all...Lots of Love always, Carly xxxxxxxxxxxxx Azanti at 12:39:8 Monday October 7 2002 Tom - hope my m8 is looking after you up there. I still come here and read your book. It is good to see how much love there is for you. We have done a memorial for Becky on the net now so the love your friends have for you has allready inspired other people. Little Em - I tell Becky I love her every night before I go to sleep. My heart reaches out to you. Stay strong. I'm sure Tommy is proud of you. sis! x at 23:30:50 Saturday October 5 2002 I love you |