Recall Notice

By

The Editor: UK Atheist & Science E-Zine


Important Announcement

Due to basic design errors it has become necessary to seriously reconsider the role of the humanoid unit within the Galactic society.

Justification follows:

Introduction.

Ever since its introduction into varied environments the humanoid unit has demonstrated significant flaws in several key areas. As such it's future must now be carefully considered.

Design.

The basic humanoid unit is of bipedal design (a cylindrical central section with attached bifurcate limbs and a high-evolution all-aspect device - sensor array ("HEAD:SA" or "HEAD"). The units CPU, also located in the HEAD, gives a full 120 degree stereo optical capability with 360 degree sweep, rapid feedback and reaction time. The advanced Protection, Holographic & Enhanced Audio-visual Reaction system (PHEAR) is particularly acute.

Justification

The unit, originally designed to function as a serf race to its creator/s, has been found to be fragile in most conditions. In collision with the majority of objects the unit often suffers the greater degree of damage and is, in physiologically terms, an abysmal failure:

The intelligence potential of the unit is reported to be variable but the most serious problems can be seen in the units psychological profile which demonstrates an apparently infinite capacity for hatred, deceit, falsehood, avarice, jealousy, disobedience & violence.

The history of the unit has also turned up some interesting data. It seems initial problems were reported in the prototype model/s when the female breeder, following a conversation with a legless reptile and in defiance of clearly stated rules, ingested fruit from a tree she understood to be the font of all knowledge. Shortly afterwards she convinced the male prototype to do the same and, as a result, the authorities banned them from the area and denied them further use of the local amenities. Further research on education by ingestion has been carried out but the results were, well, fruitless.

Summary.

It is recommended that the humanoid unit be recalled from service and replaced by one that addresses most, if not all, of these issues.

The only issue remaining to be resolved is the chosen method of removal and the new VX:N system could well be the best option. Nano-probe based sterilisation systems such as VX:N are highly target-specific and have shown very positive results in planetary scale tests.

Some of the more vocal protest groups have protested the use of VX:N on the basis that slow dissolution is highly distressing to the target and is understood to cause considerable neural damage and pain. However since these effects only last for a few weeks they are not considered to be significant.

Hell 9000 (speaking for CyberDyne Systems CPU)