Chapter Three : Gay Prince



I passed through those exalted doors of the Diamond Palace for the first time, with Sir Isaac.  Around my head and small wound, The Knight’s colours and crest.  Around my wrist, the ribbon of Topaz.  As we entered the great mirrored hall of the palace, Threes, fours, fives…up to sevens were bowing, well, at Sir Isaac. 
Sir Isaac had found my real work permit and instructions for the day in the purser’s office, while organizing the disposal of Jackson to the crypt.
This was such a day.  My instructions were to proceed to the Queen’s apartments to change all her locks, by order of the king himself, and return the keys only to him.  The Queen!  I might see her, even talk to her.  I wondered seriously if there might be a chance to speak to her about her daughter.  She might get to like me, who knows. 
Sir Isaac gave me quick instructions on how to find the Queen’s apartments and bade me a cordial farewell (but not before flattering my swordsmanship, and courage), before peeling off for the royal rooms and court, while I climbed the stairs to the apartments above.  I was bloated with pride, and a feeling of achievement.
In front of the whole court and Topaz!  I had beaten Jackson, rated the third finest swordsman in Cardland! And the purser, but he wasn’t much.  A matron had run on as we left to stop his bleeding, so I have not killed yet.  To be candid I was relieved.  I do not know how I would cope if I killed someone.  I actually felt sorry for him, when he squealed with pain.  So, now I would be considered number three.  There were several at my level, I had to admit to myself: like Sir Mosswood of Clubland, Sir Isaac, Sir Valentine of Heartland, Sir Leighton of Spadelands, and a few others. Oh yes, and some Colonel Bolt of Heartlands had quite a reputation.  Still, not fucking bad for a Two Club.
And there was the proof, here. As I passed through the maze of corridors and large open porticos, courtiers all nodded respectfully, some even smiled.  The ladies did.
The porticos opened out in to large marble courtrooms, ballrooms, yet more halls, corridors and galleries. In all the galleries there were rows and rows of card tables with people at play.
 Even though my mind was far away, I could not fail to notice the decadent opulence of the palace.  There were large mirrors everywhere, some taking up a whole wall, gallery, or door.  In Clubland no one under a Five could even afford a hand mirror. In between the mirrors were oil paintings by Rembrandt, Vermeer and pointedly Goya’s Los Caprichos, on the cruelty of war. And the chandeliers!  Everywhere.  Rows and rows, all in cut diamonds.
Wherever there were stone or wooden walls, there was the diamond motif, studded with diamonds, intermittently with rubies and topaz.  Topaz!  Oh God, Topaz.  I started to bump into people.  It was her fault, Topaz.  I kept spotting her ribbon on my wrist.  I frequently raised it to my nose.  I could just smell a trace of her scent.  Her scent!  I kept kissing it, only to get curious looks from passing courtiers.  But now, no man would dare make any derisive comments, even though I had handed my sword and daggers back to the Sergeant of the gates.  The Sergeant had given me a ticking off, with a nod and a wink about my hidden dagger.  He also explained that he wanted to throw me my sword, but the likes of him never interfered with the business of gentlemen.  ‘Gentlemen!’  My self-esteem was never so exalted.              
Topaz!  Oh Topaz…
Suddenly I was barging in to a large gentleman.  I heard him exhale air as I bounced off his paunch.  He went tripping backwards and fell on his arse.  I just managed to keep my balance.  Oh God, he was a six!
‘You silly arse!  You’re just a damned Two Club!  I will have you thrashed for…’
Then he seemed to recognize me.  He began to stammer.  ‘Dear God, Sir!  Are you not the fellow who?’…I leant forward and offered him my hand.  ‘A thousand pardons, sir.  My mistake, may I help? This is…’  Before I could finish he was on his feet as if invigorated by instant youth, and walking quickly away muttering - ‘I am only here to trade, sir, but not in swords.  Really, sir, it was my fault.’  ‘No, sir, clearly it was mine,’ I offered. ‘As you please.’ He countenanced and scurried away.  I wondered for a moment what his trade was, there were a lot of businessmen as well as diplomats at court, from all suits.  Obviously this was one of the reasons for all the opulence, to impress visitors.  And yet it occurred to me, as I continued my way, what a tremendous temptation this was to possible invaders.
There were quite a lot of high numbers around walking or sitting patiently, mostly commercial.  I respected Father Ten’s wish for me to be inconspicuous.  Although I suspect it was a little late now.  Still, I gave way to groups of gentlemen, who strutted and paraded around in their fine silks, lace and wigs.  I noticed that some of the waistcoats were beautifully embroidered and coloured, as were some shoes.  I felt envious, in my tatty and worn clothes, even though they were once of good quality, but handed down by Father Ten. 
Because of my recent spectacle, I continued to bathe in the attention of some courtiers and guests who stared at me as I passed, and whispered and nodded.  Including Jokers and midgets who pulled faces as they passed.  Especially, the ladies from behind their pretty fans.  I have to say, some of the faces were not as pretty as the fans.
I frequently got lost, but gave up asking the way.  Some would not sink so low as to speak to a mere Two Club.  Some were too scared.
I passed ‘Gossips’ Corner’ several times.  ‘Gossips’ Corner’ was in the corner of a second ballroom, allotted by the Queen, and approved by her, so she could be aware of the situations in court, and, frankly, the love affairs.  There was an uninhibited sign on the wall next to a Holbein painting of the Ambassadors and under it in the corner there was always a huddle whispering and looking slyly about them.
To my chagrin, I qualified for a lot of nods and nudges.  As I passed I heard other nuggets of gossip.  Now I was an official spy, I felt it my duty to listen.
‘The Queen has been caught  flagrante delicto!’  A woman’s voice, behind a fan.  ‘The King is sending that Two Club locksmith, to change the locks,’ she said, dropping her fan slightly so she could flirt with me over it.  Nice eyes.
They all gasped and tittered.  ‘With whom, pray?  This flagrante?’  Asked a dandy behind a silk lace handkerchief that he dabbed his powdered nose with.  ‘The king’s horse!’ A man quipped in a cultivated and affected voice.  They all laughed.  ‘But…,’ He continued.  ‘What is the point of bolting the stable door after the horse has bolted?’  They all laughed like cows on cud.   I could not see who it was at first, then a young face appeared.  A handsome young face, heavily made up; it seemed to cover bruises, even though heavy make with some men was the fashion. He had a pink wig and pink lip gloss.  His costume was of fine coloured silks and lavish embroidery.  Then I noticed his rank and coat of arms on his chest.  It was one of the Heart Princes, and by his mannerisms I thought it a pretty good guess that he was the younger, Gay Prince Rupert.
For a moment he held my eyes and with a delicate flick of his wrist waved his handkerchief, while making a compressed bow of his rouge lips.  I nodded

Courteously, and to my surprise he nodded back.  I had stopped.  I felt awkward.  Once royalty had caught your presence one had to stay until dismissed.  So I hovered and waited and listened.  The prince turned again to listen to the gossip.
‘The King has a hernia,’ said an old lady, who had so much powder on her face that her deep lines were heightened like the newly discovered canals of Mars.
‘What from, lifting up his truss?’ asked a man with a Jewish lilt. ‘Pregnant the queen is not.’  I was becoming worried.  If the prince did not dismiss me soon, I would be late for my appointment at the Queen’s apartments.
I noticed those nice eyes staring at me again, before she said,  ‘No, my dear sir, but I would think Princess Topaz is and we will see her dressmaker trying to disguise it!’
I was shaken as if by a thunderbolt from Zeus.  How dare she!  I glared at her, but then realized that they were all staring at me for a reaction, and remembered Father Ten’s dictum.  So I did something I had seen gentlemen do when angry or aroused.  I placed my left foot forward, put my hands on my hips, and lifted my chin to glare at everyone except the prince.
‘My dears, I am justified in my conviction that she is still a virgin,’ the Prince said. They all coughed, nodded and grunted ingratiatingly. Prince Rupert smiled then dismissed me with a flutter of his handkerchief.  I bowed smartly, walked backwards until I reached the open doors, turned and continued on my way.  But not before I overheard the prince say,  ‘A virgin still, like me.’  I heard them all laugh cautiously.
I was hurt and boiling with anger, but I had a duty to do.  When I was out of sight, I slipped behind one of the large doors that wasn’t completely flush with the wall to listen. 
‘That was the new lowly Two Club locksmith,’ a woman sneered, the woman with nice eyes.  ‘We know,’ the prince said patiently.  ‘Such a pretty boy.  I must have him for tea some day, or have him anyway.’  ‘What, your highness, a Two Club?  Why? He will not survive up in court, especially changing locks for an angry King.   And then there is the unconscionable Black Prince Victor around to court Topaz.  He has hated Two Clubs ever since he was trumped by one.  No, that two club will be down the mines by tomorrow.’ Those nice eyes were not nice at all.  ‘He has an education.  A gentleman,’ the prince objected.  ‘Yes, sire.  They enrol scribes at any work place.  This is what I hear.’   I think that was another dandy.   ‘Apparently Jackson was his lover, and that fight was a love quarrel.’   That was the sweet old lady. I could feel my eyes bulging and it was all I could do to stop myself confronting them in outraged denial.  ‘It was just as well he is accomplished with the sword,’ the dandy said.  ‘So…’ Prince Rupert said, with  speculative pleasure.  ‘Does he lift silk shirts as well as coarse wool?’ There was quite a long pause, while they seemed to deliberate this; until the prince said,  ‘I will take a large wager.  That pretty thing will be around for more than a month.’
I did not stay to find out how much I was worth.  I saw an officer from the household cavalry approaching and before he caught sight of me, I walked quickly away.